Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community  

Go Back   Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community > The Academy > Tilted Sexuality


 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 08-27-2005, 01:16 AM   #1 (permalink)
Insane
 
I hate my life...

So tonight it happened....guy's worst nightmare.

A little background: I started seeing this girl from work about 3 weeks ago. Aside from the occasional seeing each other at work, we've only been on 3 dates. Well tonight, immediately after getting off work, I went to her house, we rented a movie, and watched it. The movie ends, she puts on some tv, and things progress from there. Now while making out, my boy is ready and willing. We go upstairs, he seems good to go, then it all goes to shit... He won't stay standing. He'll get up after some coaxing, but sit right back down before anything can get started. Whether it be because I was tired from work, because we progressed so quickly (I'm used to taking it slower with girlfriends), or because it's been months since I've had sex. But either way, motherfucker let me down...

Now I feel embarrassed as hell, and when I see her at work tomorrow I'm sure I'll be oozing shame.

So aside from using this thread to vent...Has this ever happened to you? How did it turn out for you?
__________________
Common sense is uncommon. Ironic, isn't it?
Seething is offline  
Old 08-27-2005, 01:43 AM   #2 (permalink)
Hey Now!
 
Johnny Pyro's Avatar
 
Location: Massachusetts (Redneck, white boy town. I hate it here.)
Was she understanding about the problem?
Did she get weirded out by it?

Sounds like performance anxiety. It will pass. You just have to get comfortable with her. If you can get erections and orgasm with no problem through maturbation, its all mental. Just relax and try to enjoy it.

Some girls will assume its them. Their not good enough and thats far from the truth. If she is understanding about it, you can work together.

I learned my lesson in banging girls I worked with. I try not to when I can. It does make it uncomfortable and akward. Good luck.
__________________
"From delusion lead me to truth, from darkness lead me to light, from death lead me to eternal life. - Sheriff John Wydell
Johnny Pyro is offline  
Old 08-27-2005, 05:42 AM   #3 (permalink)
Go faster!
 
DEI37's Avatar
 
Location: Wisconsin
Yup, had it happen before. Her response? "Don't worry 'bout it. It's happened to a lot of guys, even my husband." About 20 minutes later, after kissing, and all that kind of stuff, I was good to go, and we got it on.
__________________
Generally speaking, if you were to get what you really deserve, you might be unpleasantly surprised.
DEI37 is offline  
Old 08-27-2005, 06:22 AM   #4 (permalink)
Degenerate
 
Aladdin Sane's Avatar
 
Location: San Marvelous
I've had it happen four times in my life. Three times it was because of alcohol or pot.
1. A sexy-as-hell lesbian picked me as her once a year male sex partner. I was too drunk to function, and probably suffering from performance anxiety. I was mortified.
2. I ate some pot brownies and was extremely stoned. My girlfriend wanted it bad, but nothing was happinning. Too stoned to fuck.
3. New Years Eve, 1983 (about to be '84). A bunch of us were celebrating at a spa, in a private room with a hot tub. A girl who was a long time friend let me know she wanted to take it to the next level. I was way drunk, the room was way hot, and Mr. Happy was a little noodle with no intention of getting hard. Damn!
4. I flew to Austin for a reunion with an ex. Back at the hotel, she slipped into something more comfortable, and more revealing, and intended to rev my engine, but my motor wouldn't start. Embarrassed? Yes. Terribly. No alcohol or drugs involved. I was able to do the deed a few hours later. That's really too bad, actually, because she ended up pregnant.

So there's my four worst sexual nightmares. I suppose it happens to everyone at least once. If this girl is a good person, and I assume she is, she will be completely understanding.
__________________
Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam.
Aladdin Sane is offline  
Old 08-27-2005, 08:15 AM   #5 (permalink)
Psycho
 
Location: Buffalo, New York
When I was in dating mode, I almost ALWAYS had performance anxiety! Usually it was just an inability to get to orgasm, but on several occasions the best I could manage was a semi-hard state that was of no real use to anyone.

Don't sweat it, and if she seems uncomfortable, you may just want to mention that you are used to taking more time with a new girlfriend on the way to "home plate".
MoonDog is offline  
Old 08-27-2005, 08:26 AM   #6 (permalink)
Insane
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Johnny Pyro
Was she understanding about the problem?
Did she get weirded out by it?

Sounds like performance anxiety. It will pass. You just have to get comfortable with her. If you can get erections and orgasm with no problem through maturbation, its all mental. Just relax and try to enjoy it.

Some girls will assume its them. Their not good enough and thats far from the truth. If she is understanding about it, you can work together.

I learned my lesson in banging girls I worked with. I try not to when I can. It does make it uncomfortable and akward. Good luck.
She was pretty understanding about it, thankfully. Even joking about it, saying in my wang's perspective, "You've ignored me for a while, then want me to use me all at once? It's not happening." Hopefully I can get past this and try again.
__________________
Common sense is uncommon. Ironic, isn't it?
Seething is offline  
Old 08-27-2005, 10:12 AM   #7 (permalink)
Non-smokers die everyday
 
Location: Montreal
It helps if you know that a part of your body (aside from your dick) is particularly responsive to stimuli. For me, it's my nipples; any attention there will get me hard instantly. Whenever I feel myself going soft, I just tell the girl to lick/play with them for a bit. Works every time. For other guys, it's earlobes, neck, etc. One of my friends even gets very turned on when a girl licks the inside of his elbow! Different strokes and all that...

As for the captain bailing on me, yeah it's happened before. Alcohol is the worst, since it slows down your bloodflow. As we all know, a lot of people get very frisky when on the sauce, so this can get frustrating. Therefore, I never try to have sex when I drink. Sure, I can make out and do some heavy petting, but if the girl wants to take it up a notch, I just tell her that I'd rather be sober, so that I can give her all the attention she deserves. Most girls have never been put off by that (in fact, they're flattered), and the rare one that does ain't worth your time anyway. Hell, if you still want to make her feel good and she wants it, then just go down on her or something, I don't think she'll mind that!

Bottom line is: girls usually understand. Whether it's psychological or purely mechanical, the trouble your having happens to pretty much every guy at least once. Just be honest about it (too drunk/high/tired/nervous) and play it cool.
__________________
A plan is just a list of things that don't happen.

Last edited by Bob Biter; 08-27-2005 at 10:20 AM..
Bob Biter is offline  
Old 08-27-2005, 10:32 AM   #8 (permalink)
Lover - Protector - Teacher
 
Jinn's Avatar
 
Location: Seattle, WA
.. try having it 9 outta 10 times with your beautiful girlfriend. We're talkin 15+ times now.. yeaaaaaaaaaaaaa.. be glad its only once.

/in pain...
__________________
"I'm typing on a computer of science, which is being sent by science wires to a little science server where you can access it. I'm not typing on a computer of philosophy or religion or whatever other thing you think can be used to understand the universe because they're a poor substitute in the role of understanding the universe which exists independent from ourselves." - Willravel
Jinn is offline  
Old 08-27-2005, 02:01 PM   #9 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Once, I think it was some combination of fatigue, substances, and having been well-used many times in the previous 24 hours.
vautrain is offline  
Old 08-28-2005, 07:09 AM   #10 (permalink)
Devoted
 
Redlemon's Avatar
 
Donor
Location: New England
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aladdin Sane
3. New Years Eve, 1983 (about to be '84). A bunch of us were celebrating at a spa, in a private room with a hot tub. A girl who was a long time friend let me know she wanted to take it to the next level. I was way drunk, the room was way hot, and Mr. Happy was a little noodle with no intention of getting hard. Damn!
I don't think it is possible to keep it up in a hot tub. We bought a waterproof vibrator for that very reason.
__________________
I can't read your signature. Sorry.
Redlemon is offline  
Old 08-28-2005, 05:21 PM   #11 (permalink)
Upright
 
just a quick point reallly -- don't feel bad - it happens to everybody.

If however it keeps on happening, you may need to do some reasurring for her too. In my experience women can get a bit paranoid if you can't get/maintain wood, or cum.

I think she's reacted the right way though... joking about it a little will help break the tension. I don't know how much you want to talk about it with her, I suggest you discuss why you feel (if you feel) pressure or tension.

Good luck.

MrT
Mr_Tickles is offline  
Old 08-28-2005, 09:50 PM   #12 (permalink)
Upright
 
maybe you were tired.
this_is_vince is offline  
Old 08-29-2005, 03:22 PM   #13 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: on the road to where I want to be...
It happened to me once, probably because I pulled a Something About Mary and unloaded the gun before I went out for the night.

Bad, Bad idea. The less you jerk off, the easier it is to get sir willy up when it matters.

My story has a happy ending though...that was the first time that ever happened to me, and I was embarassed as hell. So I got some Viagra from one of my friends.

Went two rounds, and was till poking the chick in her back the entire night.

__________________
Dont be afraid to change who you are for what you could become
kangaeru is offline  
Old 08-29-2005, 03:39 PM   #14 (permalink)
Getting Medieval on your ass
 
Coppertop's Avatar
 
Location: 13th century Europe
Quote:
Originally Posted by Redlemon
I don't think it is possible to keep it up in a hot tub. We bought a waterproof vibrator for that very reason.
Speak for yourself there, buddy. Hot tubs have never proven to be insurmountable for me. Now, weed, on the other hand...

Diff'rent strokes, indeed.
Coppertop is offline  
Old 08-29-2005, 04:41 PM   #15 (permalink)
... a sort of licensed troubleshooter.
 
Willravel's Avatar
 
Just don't pop those pills. Speaking as someone who knew the '24-hour-hard-on-guy' (my buddy took ONE and he was ready to go long after he passed out), it's an unnecessary risk. Kangaeru, you're lucky.
Willravel is offline  
Old 08-29-2005, 07:11 PM   #16 (permalink)
Insane
 
If all goes well, I should get another chance tomorrow night. I've already put a hold on masturbating and I'll definitely try relaxing a bit more. Thanks for the advice, guys.
__________________
Common sense is uncommon. Ironic, isn't it?
Seething is offline  
Old 08-30-2005, 05:13 AM   #17 (permalink)
Devoted
 
Redlemon's Avatar
 
Donor
Location: New England
Quote:
Originally Posted by Coppertop
Speak for yourself there, buddy. Hot tubs have never proven to be insurmountable for me. Now, weed, on the other hand...

Diff'rent strokes, indeed.
I also have pretty low blood pressure; I'm thinking that, at least for me, heat = blood vessel dilation = less pressure = soft dick.
__________________
I can't read your signature. Sorry.
Redlemon is offline  
Old 08-30-2005, 05:53 AM   #18 (permalink)
face f$cker
 
Location: canada
well its sounds mental....but now you have even MORE pressure on you for the next time! She may have to roll her sleeves up and help out a little more.....maybe a little oral, or whatever turns your crank.....sounds like your best bet may be to have a couple drinks to take the nervousness off!
hossified is offline  
Old 08-30-2005, 06:25 AM   #19 (permalink)
Here
 
World's King's Avatar
 
Location: Denver City Denver
I'm pretty much always hard.
__________________
heavy is the head that wears the crown
World's King is offline  
Old 08-30-2005, 08:45 AM   #20 (permalink)
Banned
 
Location: Massachusetts, USA
Quote:
Originally Posted by World's King
I'm pretty much always hard.
What are you, young or sumthin'??
denim is offline  
Old 08-30-2005, 11:17 AM   #21 (permalink)
MSD
The sky calls to us ...
 
MSD's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: CT
When you do get it up tonight, you need to do your best imitation of Anakin during the Episode 1 pod race, "It's working ... It's wooorrrrkiiiinnnnng!!!
MSD is offline  
Old 08-30-2005, 11:48 AM   #22 (permalink)
Getting Medieval on your ass
 
Coppertop's Avatar
 
Location: 13th century Europe
Quote:
Originally Posted by MrSelfDestruct
When you do get it up tonight, you need to do your best imitation of Anakin during the Episode 1 pod race, "It's working ... It's wooorrrrkiiiinnnnng!!!
Thus ensuring her departure from his life forever.
Coppertop is offline  
Old 08-30-2005, 12:18 PM   #23 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: on the road to where I want to be...
yeah get drunk, thats also a VERY good suggestion.
__________________
Dont be afraid to change who you are for what you could become
kangaeru is offline  
Old 08-30-2005, 12:30 PM   #24 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: Colorado Springs, Colorado
Not TOO drunk though... then it might be even more of a disaster.


Ummm my only suggestion is to do it when you're not really tired.

<--- knows from experience. Tiredness sucks... on both ends.
__________________
"You must be the change you wish to see in the world." - Gandhi
eMOTIONal20 is offline  
 

Tags
hate, life

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 12:09 AM.

Tilted Forum Project

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
© 2002-2012 Tilted Forum Project

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311 312 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 320 321 322 323 324 325 326 327 328 329 330 331 332 333 334 335 336 337 338 339 340 341 342 343 344 345 346 347 348 349 350 351 352 353 354 355 356 357 358 359 360