bera

Psicologicaly speaking, or at the practice, what are your problems in sex?

Ustwo

Frequency

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Agents of the enemies who hold office in our own government, who attempt to eliminate our "freedoms" and our "right to know" are posting among us, I fear.....on this very forum. - host

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ratbastid

The common practice here is, if you have a question for discussion, you kick things off with your own answer. If you want a discussion to occur, you have to start discussing. Dropping a one-liner question-bomb doesn't do that.

Sage

Hey, everyone was a rookie once, even YOU silly

I shall bestow my wisdom and reveal more about the greatness that is me once s/he who asked the question does do the same (everyone's gotta learn somehow, right?)

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drewpy

i can second the Ustwo post ... it's gotta be frequency by a long shot - everything else pales.

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"Once made equal to a man, woman becomes his superior." Socrates

drewpy

btw - ratbastid - these types of threads are ideal for boosting post count - drop a one liner and move on. not that drewpy would do that ....

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"Once made equal to a man, woman becomes his superior." Socrates

bera

You people can get really agressive... (I didn´t say everyone does!)

Well, my problem is... I don´t konw! All I know is, for some reason, I can´t treat sex normaly anymore. Since the end of my last relationship, it´s beeing kind of a taboo for me.

=/

bera

ps.:

I´m not a book writer. I just can´t write fifty lines here. I just tought you people could go on with the topic algon with me.
Sorry if I bothered anyone...

lurkette

Not bothered, it's just a point of board etiquette. Before you ask people to reveal pretty intimate details of their lives, it's good form to either share something about yourself, or let them know why you're interested. Sorry for harshing on you, we just get a lot of silly one-line "things that make you go hmmm" threads that go nowhere. Not that this is a silly question.

I'll pony up:

Problems with sex:
- Like many women, I have a hard time orgasming without clitoral stimulation, which can make things difficult. It takes me a while to get there, and sometimes getting the timing right for both of us (not talking simultaneous orgasm, just keeping things er...stimulating) is just impossible.

- Ratbastid is a foot taller than I am, which makes shower sex difficult for one or the other of us. If I'm standing up, he has to bend his knees. If I'm up on the edge of the tub, he's comfy but my knees and up getting turned out and dislocated. (I have bad knees).

- I want a girlfriend. One who wouldn't mind occasionally playing with ratbastid, too. It is becoming clearer and clearer to me that the current object of my affections, female-wise, is not really a compatible match for me. I'm so out of practice with dating - I met ratbastid week 1 of college and we've been together ever since - I have no idea how to go about finding someone.

- All of my fantasies seem to be about submission. For some reason this bothers me.

- I get bladder infections very easily, so sometimes sex is just plain painful. Cranberry juice is your friend. Well, my friend anyhow.

- My clitoris seems to bruise easily. Or maybe I'm just extraordinarily aggressive with it or something. Anyhow, sometimes it can be so painful that wearing pants hurts.

I'm sure I could think of more. Overall, I'm pretty happy with my sex life. We've found ways to work around a lot of the things that have been problems in the past, and we have a lot of fun I do wish I had more drive - so does ratbastid - but until I get off b/c and Paxil things are probably going to proceed as they are for a while.

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Siege

I think it's from all the clitoral stimulation

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"Your name's Geek? Do you know the origin of the term? A geek is someone who bites the heads off chickens at a circus. I would never let you suck my dick with a name like Geek"

--Kevin Smith

This part just makes my posts easier to find

tiltedbc

my biggest problem is finding someone I'm honestly attracted to and is available.

Siege

Actually, I find I have that problem too. I didn't really post it because I didn't think it had too much to do with me having sex.

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"Your name's Geek? Do you know the origin of the term? A geek is someone who bites the heads off chickens at a circus. I would never let you suck my dick with a name like Geek"

--Kevin Smith

This part just makes my posts easier to find

bera

Hey lurkette, I loved your answer.

"All of my fantasies seem to be about submission. For some reason this bothers me."

I think geting bothered by your fantasies is a mistakes. If they are your fantasies, just try to live them! I think our fantasies can always make us happy. If realised without blame or something.

Hektore

Well, my parents were 16 and 17 when I was born...So guess what's always in the back of my mind nagging away.

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Acetylene

Lurkette, get one of those stools meant for old or handicapped people that sort of lock onto the tub. Of, do what we did and buy some boots with the highest heels you can find.

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streak_56

Psychologically I have nothing wrong with sex, but I abstain from sex because I know I cannot support a baby, and I do not want to take any risks. My gf agrees with me, hopefully.

Lead543

No sweetheart, I'm carrying your love child. *Rawr*

Like my lovely boyfriend said, neither one of us can support a child, it would jepordize *both* our futures. And bla bla bla use a pill and a condom. I've been on the pill for almost 4 years and I've never been able to take it perfectly month after month. And condoms break. I'd rather be overly cautious and save 3 lives...

We're too young and unstable, that's the only problem here.

and what a problem it is.

Daniel_

Brave of you to admit it though.

My problem is after a long time with a faker and a reluctant partner, I can't get it out of my head that I'm forcing myself on my GF.

It's miserable - I just get these black dog moods that make me think she's pretending to like it, for the sake of shutting me up.

I don't want predatory agressive sex from her, but I get frightened that I'm no better than a rapist at times.

We had a long chat about it recently, and it turns out that she just thought I was beign gentle and considerate, and she liked it.

Yay for me!

Still feel odd at times though.

I suppose what I need is a LOT of understanding.

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Charlatan

After frequency (a common problem for most men, if not people in general) I would say it is getting my wife to be more experimental... She is very much a "wham, bam, thank you ma'am" type of person when it comes to sex. She likes to get her rocks off and move on... too much more is wasting her percious time.

This isn't to say the sex we have isn't bad... quite on the contrary. I just want more variation...

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"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars."
- Old Man Luedecke

*Rhapsody*

i like it too much.

noodles

frequency, due to a long distance relationship (which i'd like to note is actually doing pretty kickass despite the distance)

i might require a certain type of stimulation to get off (which is a double-edged sword and i won't go into details unless prompted). i'm not 100% sure, since i don't get to test things out very often due to the first problem.

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KingOtter67

I don't like doing all the work ALL the time. It'd be nice if I could lay back and enjoy it more often.

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KingOtter
You can't push on a rope.

superredhead

getting over my own insecurities. worrying about if im doing something right, body image, and other things really kills the mood for me. luckily i've found someone thats definitely helping me work on that

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*yawn*

rmarshall

I agree with Charlatan. I sometime wish she'd get off her back and get on top once in awhile. The frequency is good: just about every morning and some nights. I'd be game for every night too! She gets more aggressive when she's smoked alot of pot. Weekend evenings are good for that. But she's trying to cut back on that and be good.
I think she doesn't like to wake up too much. She goes back to sleep for a bit after I go to work.

maleficent

I'm too fussy... and not even close to being attractive enough or smart enough or a dynamic enough personality to be as fussy as I am... I think my wants are simple... make me laugh... make me think... don't make everything a competition... and please dear god have a backbone... the older I get the more I realize that my wants aren't so simple and they are impossible to find... (three and half years and counting... and nothing in sight.)

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anti fishstick

A lot of mine are similar to lurkette's. It's hard for us to have shower sex since I'm so much shorter and he has to bend his knees as well. BUT on the upside, I'm small and light enough that he can carry me and have sex that way, which is always nice.

I too get bladder infections easily and they are not fun. I think my bladder is weaker overall since my first infection..

My vagina gets sore easily too after 2 or 3 times of sex, or just one really long session.

This may or may not be a "problem", but when I come, it gets very messy. And I often ruin the sheets and mattress

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And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
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rmarshall

That's not a problem! My sweetie is a squirter too and I love it. Now there is something you can't fake!

anti fishstick

yeah but I just haven't mastered the art of blankets to catch my mess. We're often unprepared. :P

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And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
~Anais Nin

rmarshall

It's mostly water. You sleep on a wet spot. You do laundry every week. Big deal!

Charlatan

A gallant man would offer to sleep on the wet spot...

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"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars."
- Old Man Luedecke

Charlatan

I just want to clarify in my wife's defense... she is almost always on top at some point in the event and even initiates sex... all good things.

My issue is that I have an over active fantasy life that i would like to bring to fruition. She sees much of this as a waste of valuable time and much prefers to get down to business... get her rocks off and move on to sleeping or other things...

She behaves much like a stereotypical male in this regard and I think she might be the first to adimit it...

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"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars."
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snowy

This is why I like being on top...then the mess just ends up on him and it's easily mopped up with a towel

My problem? Frequency. Not enough of it. There are other offers on the table, but there is one guy in particular who does all these fantastic things to my body...Suffice it to say, it will be worth the wait.

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Fett56

Frequency and confidence issues.

I've never had sex though.

rmarshall

The wet spot usually is in the center of the bed. That's the cat's spot when the action stops. Hehehe!

Axiom_e

I have emotional hang up with sex.

I like to have some type of emotional connection with my partner.
The emotional connection doesn't need to be love, just that I have to actually care about the person past the act of sex.

So while I desire the one night stand- I just can't do that (trying to change).

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Grasshopper Green

I wish I had more of a sex drive. I'm on an anti-depressant right now, which tends to kill it....but I get depressed easily when I'm not on an anti-depressant, which also kills libido....*sigh*

I have body issues, like a lot of women, but I know my husband finds me sexy anyway, so that's never been an issue while we are together. However, we are dipping our toes into the waters of swinging...and I know that my issues will crop up then. However, I have been going to the gym, so I'm working on this one.

I have difficulty reaching orgasm through penetration alone. And oral does nothing for me...so this is a problem that we definitely have had to work around.

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mokle

Being honest about what I want...

I have sort of a freaky mind, I find the usually "missionary quicky" to be quite boring, and I have to struggle to get off, haha.

My problem I guess, not theirs. I just need to find a kinky girl that's very upfront

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Mokle
"Your hands can't hit what your eyes can't see" -Ali

burnRedDress

I love sex with my current girlfriend, but a problem I've always had is that I always have to be more active than my partner. Maybe I'm just extremely unlucky with partners, but every girl I've slept with hasn't been too into taking the lead.

I'm not talking about tying me down & pulling out whips & chains, just simple little things like changing position or commencing with oral. Such things only happen because I make them happen.

It's always been that way and I'm pretty much over it. I really have the impression that if I don't do anything, then nothing will happen...

bing bing

The only problem i have is the inability to reach orgasm most times. I stop as soon as she's had enough, but some girls really get upset by me not coming and get all paranoid.

ruggerp11

My problem is that my girlfriend is 1200 miles away in another time zone.

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