tuner

Howdy how. I'd like to know the opinion of the fellow TFPers on this question. Does masturbation cause to you any negative side-effects, such as inability to concentrate, fatique (mental and physical), difficulty in working and even fits of VERY VERY negative thoughts (minor fits of depression?)?

I, being single with a pathetic sex life (a non-existant one actually), have turned to the comfort of self-pleasuring quite a lot recently, talking myself into it since I see a lot of positive remarks when I google the subject ("can relieve depression", "can enhance sex life", etc), or when reading TFP . I don't know what the average frequency of masturbation for most people is, having seen posts here that talk about daily action etc, but I have lately been drawn more and more into porn and frequent masturbation. On an average, I'd say I "spank the monkey" 4 times a week, if I give in to my horniness...

To be honest, I'm not yet sure about the effects of masturbation. Having grown up (I'm 20 now) taught that there is a reason the word "wanker" is derogatory, I must say that I'm ambivalent about the subject. I see people glorifying porn and masturbation, because "it feels good, so it can't be wrong", and I sometimes buy it and well, you know what happens then... On the other hand, I can go without any for a whole month. I have done "one month long wank-free challenges" a couple of times and seen my motivation, clarity of thought and overall mood rise. In other occasions, I have given in and enjoyed it with no side-effects, mostly after prolonged periods of stress.

Unfortunately, lately I have noticed that masturbation is taking its toll in the development of my social life. When I do it, I become unattentive, I start to procrastinate and I generally become a sad, pathetic individual; an apath. Some times I suddenly find myself focusing on all the negative things in my life, I start hating being around people, I despise having work to do and so on. These feelings last for maybe half a day. Then I'm back to a "normal" situation, although I guess that I become a worse person every time, and this is worrying me and makes me mad at myself at the same time. The counter-indicator is that my wank-free days I am in a better mood, so I know that these effects are indeed caused by masturbation.

Soooo... Has anyone else had these "symptoms"? I'm starting to get anxious that continuing this routine could lead to permanent "character damage". I'm also afraid that having established masturbation as the "easy way" of pleasure, I am lowering my chances of meeting girls and making myself more bitter and defiant of intimacy every day... but that's (maybe) a whole other story.

Suave

If I were you, I'd talk to a psychologist about this rather than us. Masturbation has not been correlated to any chronic negative emotional symptoms, but that doesn't mean you couldn't be getting them from it. Everything from here on out will be complete speculation on my part.

-The increase in testosterone levels could be creating a slight quasi-pubescent hormone boost that you're not used to, increasing some of the negative feelings related to testosterone such as aggression (aggression does not mean one can't be apathetic).

-You also might have some sort of negative preconceived notion of masturbation as defining a person to be lacking in worth, self-esteem, or prowess (or of being a shameful act). This could lead to negative emotions after you have performed it, as you might attribute negativity towards yourself for having done so.

__________________
"Few people are capable of expressing with equanimity opinions which differ from the prejudices of their social environment. Most people are even incapable of forming such opinions." - Albert Einstein

"Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something." - Plato

Coppertop

If it did no one would ever be happy. Besides, who doesn't feel good when they come? I mean, seriously? If it does cause depression, something's wrong. My professional opinion* is that you're in a slump and are depressed about that, not the masturbation.

* I'm not a real doctor, I just play one on TFP

tuner

Thanks. To be honest, I'm pretty reluctant to bring this up to psychologist levels. I'm a firm believer in the idea that psychological problems can be solved without professional help, at least in the first stages, so I'm currently thinking over my thoughts and reactions.Exactly... The word I was looking for was exactly that: AGGRESSION. It seems that I get a lot more frustrated than usually and just want everyone to step out of my way, or there will be trouble (although I'd never punch somebody without a very serious reason, I can't help but have such thoughts).This is actually how I have self-diagnosed my problem thus far. As already mentioned, I was always taught that masturbation is a bad thing, and although it gives immense pleasure, I feel bad after doing it most of the time. I feel like I'm giving up a certain subset of the things I was taught as a kid. This is certainly something that makes me unhappy with my behavior, a certain amount of self-loathing being involved in this.

However, there are also other (psychosomatical) side-effects, most notably fatique, difficulty of concentration etc. For a couple of hours after masturbation, it feels as if my head is full of air and (I'm not kidding you here) I tend to lose focus after looking at things. It's like running at half cycles or something... really worrying. The day I have masturbated, I am also less attentive to things going on around me; I feel out of tune with people; I don't feel as nervous (or snappy) around girls as usual (which can be a good thing, if you're cool, but too cool/distant looks plain dumb).

TexanAvenger

Alright, I'm taking a shot with the same disclaimer as Coppertop...

You say you've turned to mastubation a lot lately... Masturbation, or rather, orgasm, releases endorphins, hormones that bind to opiate receptors in the brain. When you have a lot of build up of any chemical in your brain, it creates more receptors, and that same amount of a chemical does not cause the same rush it used to. (This is, if you haven't already seen it, the backing to a lot of addiction problems)

What this means is that, while the orgasm still causes a surge of endorphins, and thus the characteristic opiate effect, the magnitude of the effect is lessened. What's more, the level of endorphins your body releases throughout the natural course of the day may now only have a negligable effect due to an intense increase in receptors. This could result in the depression you seem to feel since your brain is becoming accustomed to having a much larger amount of endorphins... like a kind of pleasure withdrawl.

Please, some medical person correct me on this and tell me I didn't actually just correctly analyze why masturbation could lead to depression... It seems like such an uncharacteristic thing for me to do... (being right, that is)

tuner

Oh no sire, thou hast misunderstood me I didn't say I don't enjoy the process... I said it makes me feel weird afterwards, both mentally and physically.Well, yeah, that's also quite possible, that the weariness experienced after masturbation makes me mentally exaggerate my situation...

tuner

I am not a doctor either, but I find your explanation quite logical. I don't know about the hard facts though, and having never been addicted to anything serious (except music ) I can't really say anything to back up your hypothesis.

I have a couple of questions for you however... You say that an orgasm releases endorphins. If I recall correctly, training also does the same thing. This would then mean that intensive physical training (apart from aerobic wrist workout ) would also have the same effects. I've also read stuff about people masturbating to get to sleep faster, but this has seemingly no effect on me; quite the contrary I'd say, as it actually makes me stay up (not a pun) longer.

I must admit to not getting so great a "kick" from various happenings lately though (thus my self-description as an apath, sometimes).

Val_1

NOT masterbating makes me depressed.

__________________

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.

-Frank Sinatra

tuner

So, it doesn't make tou tired/weary/bored etc? Especially the tired part.

skinnymofo

i know it wasnt pointed at me but, to answer your question i personally dont get tired bored or weary.
Its often a thing ill do before going to do something important to relieve stress levels and bring in a calm happy relaxed mood.
I think you just may be thinking way too hard about it.

moonbelka

you are all going to laugh at this, but i actually did a class project to find out the answer to this question. the results?
the more men masturbate the happier they are.
the more women masturbate the less happy they are.

note, no causal inference implied, it's just a correlation.

Suave

Oh, as far as feeling tired afterwards, that's normal. Just beat off late at night instead of early in the day.

__________________
"Few people are capable of expressing with equanimity opinions which differ from the prejudices of their social environment. Most people are even incapable of forming such opinions." - Albert Einstein

"Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something." - Plato

snowy

See...when I masturbate I get energized.

However, orgasms during sex exhaust me.

Weird, I know.

But no, feelings of tiredness are completely normal after orgasm. And masturbation should never be anything to be ashamed of--it's certainly a better alternative than unsafe sex.

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If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau

Suave

To clarify snowy's point though, don't go taking pictures of yourself in the act and using them as Christmas cards or anything.

__________________
"Few people are capable of expressing with equanimity opinions which differ from the prejudices of their social environment. Most people are even incapable of forming such opinions." - Albert Einstein

"Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something." - Plato

Anomaly_

I'd have to say you're wrong on this count, but it's pretty common that people think they can "will" their way through psychological problems (especially with blowhards like Dr. Phil distilling these problems into a simple matter of choice.) The rational mind is not very helpful in rectifying these problems; it really takes long, intensive interpersonal contact (usually therapy) to work your way through entrenched thought patterns and behaviors. It is only humorous now to look back at Freud and his auto-psychoanalysis.

Anyway, it may be something worth considering.

abaya

^^ I very much second Anomaly's statement. Usually those who believe they are doing okay without therapy are those who would benefit the most from it. It sounds like you have some serious patterns that need an outside, objective opinion... and really, the only thing to be lost is one's pride (if that's what's holding you back, which is what holds most people back). Please, do yourself and your relationships (now and in the future) a favor and give counseling a try... take it from someone who overthinks EVERYTHING.

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And think not you can direct the course of Love;
for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
--Khalil Gibran

doncalypso

I think the point Tuner is trying to make is that he's starting to have negative feelings about masturbation because to him it means he's unable to get any pussy by his own merit if he has to resort to his man-to-hand relationship. I completely understand because I felt the same way when I was single and couldn't get sex even if my life depended on it. I would masturbate to relieve the sexual tension, but it left me feeling like an idiot because in the end I still couldn't get any even if my life depended on it.

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tuner

True that. Unfortunately it's also a lame alternative to safe sex.

tuner

Exactly my thoughts, although I'm also worried about the psychosomatical aspects of the "sport" too.

hrandani

I feel the need to make my first post here by stating that what TexanAvenger has said is highly misleading, while factually accurate.

We typically associate the feeling of needing more and more of a certain drug or action to get 'high' with drugs like cocaine or heroin. This is completely accurate in that context. However, these drugs produce a neurotransmitter overload somewhere in the neighborhood of several hundred thousand times what an orgasm releases. So you can't get 'addicted' to sex like you can cocaine - physilogically.

So it's about the difference between me pissing off a cliff and the Niagra Falls. Excessive sex and masturbation cannot, in fact, produce a neurological imbalance in the way described. The difference that say, porn stars, or old married couples, feel towards sex before their career and during is completely psychological.

nukeu666

i would say depression makes u masterbate...at least it did me

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K-Wise

I look at masturbation as a fun activity when I'm bored. And a before sleep ritual. Honestly though if it did cause depression I'd probably have pulled the plug by now...seriously you do not know lol. Of course I don't have a girl right now and a lot of free time so that could be why I do it so often haha .

Asta!!

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ngdawg

Perhaps your feelings stem from the fact that you said you were 'taught' it's bad...you were taught wrong.
Then you feed on those thoughts that, since you're such a bad person, no one will ever want you. You can see where this is going-you're building negative thought upon another. It has NOTHING to do with your pasttime and everything to do with the subconscious trying to make you feel guilty over it. You need to get rid of those wrongful teachings.
Every animal masturbates at some level. It's normal.
And don't hesitate to seek professional help for those times you need it. We go to doctors for physical ailments-we really need to stop this train of thought that tells us mental ailments need no fixing.

cowudders14

I masturbate when I'm depressed - The rush and release it gives me means I can't help but feel good - It's a good anti-depressant for me.

Also, I've been to councelling in the past - they are very good people, and the streotypical view of councellors being scary is plain wrong. Do go - you'll really find the experiance useful.

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Cimarron29414

Tuner,

Are you overweight or do you suffer from any health issues? You could have a blood pressure issue causing your vision and light-headed issues. I would DEFINITELY go to a doctor and tell him. You don't have to tell him how you discovered the issue. You can say it's when you walk a flight of stairs, or jog. He will stress test your heart. Don't screw around with heart related issues. Ever heard of strokes?

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"Here lies The_Jazz: Killed by an ambitious, sparkly, pink butterfly."

tuner

I now realize I might have given you the wrong impression. I am not overweight, I have a normal BMI. I have no problem with running, I actually do quite a lot of walking every day. I also have (apparently) no health problems, at least not since the last time I checked with a doctor (a month ago). I consider my self a pretty normal person in comparison with my surrounding people, don't see me as an out-sider, and seriously I sometimes have more self-esteem than I probably should (unfortunately only on authenticity and not on sexual/relationship issues). The "vision issue" is something that's happening because of my un-focusing on everything by simply staring. Thanks for the concern though. I hope this clears some things up.

I really appreciate all of your responses and I must say that I begin to see that some things I thought I only saw, are pretty straightforward. ngdawg's reply was pretty thought-provoking for me, but I have to admit that changing one's upbringing beliefs is one of the hardest things to do, and as I said, it doesn't feel bad ALWAYS, but only when I think too much about it.

doncalypso's post also rings very true to me. It's definitely not THE reason (as far as I can tell) I feel bad after masturbation, but it sure takes up a lot of my meta-thinking time.

Thanks for your time. Keep the replies coming.

Val_1

Nope, not in the least. After sex I get tired, though. Go figure.

__________________

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-Frank Sinatra

tillzen

As an older male who has splashed, spilled and flung his seed for 37 of his 48 years I will offer this perspective. Chi is key and masterbation depletes chi. The older one gets, the more pronounced this becomes though those who exercize and yoga will tell you how these workouts slow this process. I refrain from masterbating when I'm bluer (depressed) and the longer I go without, the better I feel. The opposite is true for if I give in and masterbate once twice or even 3 times in a day, my depression is palpable. (Plus after 45 when you cum more than twice a puff of dust replaces the sperm @ orgasm <g>) The endorphin folks are correct but the loss of chi that goes with aging is pronounced. The good news is that aging is a major joy as everything becomes clearer and this planet (even on it's worse days) makes much more sense. I strongly recommend aging to all who live well and honor the greater good.
paz y luz cb

braindamage351

The feeling of orgasm is not that strong. Sex is the ultimate symbol of being successful enough to breed. The feeling you get from having sex in general is better than the feeling of orgasm (at least for guys). Not being able to have that can have a strong psychological effect.


Sperm never runs out. It always refills (eventually) no matter how much you masturbate. The only reason it doesn't work at an older age is because your body has slowed down and lost the ability to produce it so easily. Excersize and yoga just keep the body healthy, alloweing you to do this for a longer time. There's nothing magical about it, and there isn't a big well of seed that you drain every time you wax the weasel. The depression happens because older people can't handle much stimulation anymore.

akito

There could be some more psychological affects to masturbation than people think. I study psychology and sociology a little, and I've gathered some thoughts on it from personal experience as well as from what other people tell me.

First off, I do believe that there CAN BE a connection between masturbation and depression. I'm not saying one causes the other, but that they have the ability to be linked. Allow me to attempt to explain:

psychology, as a man or woman, you desire sex, that's just natural. When you can't have sex, yet you're horny, what do you do? Odds are you masturbate, because getting yourself off is the next best thing. What >>I believe<< can happen there is when you masturbate you realize how much you want sex, you kind of crave it more, because a part of you thinks "wow, this feels great, the real thing would feel so much better", but when you think of the real thing, you also realize you don't have it. That then causes a series of events in your mind leading you to realize that you aren't getting laid.

I hope that makes sense. It's basic, and I could go into more depth, but I think that essentially covers it.

Cimarron29414

Since you say you have no health issues, I will agree with others that your problem seems to be psychological.

Masturbation is not shameful - period.

__________________
Gives a man a halo, does mead.

"Here lies The_Jazz: Killed by an ambitious, sparkly, pink butterfly."

ironmaiden7o7

I doubt that masterbation would cause depression atall. If anything, I would like to think that it relieves the negativity in our lives. You definitely need to speak to a professional here, we can give you all the advice in the world but we're no doctors. I hope you get better. *hug*

tuner

I'd like to thank everyone for their replies. I'm currently feeling ok with everything, whether I do it or not. My best guess after hearing your opinions is that sometimes I think too much about it, which is what causes all those problematic thoughts that bring me in the "depressive" mindset. If I "fire and forget" I don't think it even affects anything, besides my having a bit of a clouded mind for an hour or so.

Just to keep some credibility though (since my mood swings are not *THAT* often), I'd like to notice that although masturbating itself isn't shameful (ejaculation is ejaculation, whether it's after intercourse with someone or with my hand), in my opinion it's kind of a cheap thrill that puts a stop to my horniness which should put me in a psychological opinion to sotring out the girlfriend problem in my life. That's my only regret and why I'm a bit cautious about declaring masturbation as the ultimate thing to do in your spare time.

todd

Yes, I have experienced depression like symptoms after masturbation.

At times, masturbation shows symptoms similar to a sugar high. After I finish I feel absolutly great for a while, maybe an hour or two. More often than not, the high gradually just wears off and all is fine. But every once in a while, maybe 1/5th of the time, as the high wears off I get very drowsy and in a bad/grumpy mood. I often feel pissed off about something, though not sure what. I find myself just sitting and staring, feeling very bored and not wanting to do really anything at all.

Maybe I just get tired from all that excitement. But if that were the case, i'd think it would kick in right away, not several hours later. Sometimes it starts much sooner, like a half hour after I masturbate. That phase doesn't last long either though, maybe a half hour or so. I really have no idea what causes this, but it hasn't ever been that big of a deal to me.

Jay You Dee

If I didn't masturbate, my life would be just like yours when you do. I used to kind of feel that way when I would masturbate to get the day started. The best thing is to get home, watch a little porn, play with the purple headed pope, then cash out. It also helps to make sure you wear clean socks the next day... I mean the cum has to go somewhere, am I right? Slather it on a sock, then you'll remember to wear clean socks the next day, and you'll be feelin' refreshed because you cleaned the pipes out the night before!

Okay, so I'm a sick fuck, but masturbation owns... with or without a girlfriend. It's also fun to masturbate while your girlfriend is laying beside you (well if she doesn't care, hell I've known mine since kindergarten, nothing freaks either one of us out "

Okay I'm rattling on. Mainly don't masturbate of the morning, jack-off at night before you cash out, and you'll get along much better.

wolf

I think most of what you are feeling is psychological, rather than the physical effects. The physical effects are not very long lasting. They include: a "high" feeling (this is from the endorphins released at climax). Lethargic/tired (many males feel this because after orgasm seratonin is released into the blood stream by the brain. This is also why so many men fall asleep after sex).

The psychological effects can vary depending on how you view yourself, and masturbation. Some people feel wonderful afterwards, in fact people can find that masturbation is the only way they can get through the day. They need that "high" in order to stay normal. Others feel terrible, sometimes men in relationships feel this way. They know that they should be having sex with their SO, but masturbation is the quick fix. Porn addiction is also similar.

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danbiles

I think you are depressed and you jack off because you have a bad sex life, not depressed because you jack off. You might be suicidal if you weren't Firing the Surgeon General. I mean think about it, what else gives you so much amusement for such a small time and money investment. Fire away!

danbiles

On second thought, perhaps you are falling in love with your hand and you are depressed that it all about sex. Use your opposite hand just to show the normal hand that you won't be taken for granted!

tuner

Hahahahaha! If I wasn't embarassed, I'd put this up as my signature

GentleDeer319

[QUOTE=moonbelka]you are all going to laugh at this, but i actually did a class project to find out the answer to this question. the results?
the more men masturbate the happier they are.
the more women masturbate the less happy they are.

That's so intersting! I would have never known that. I would think it be the same thing for both men and women. I know at the begining of my psych class they asked that same question of us and they in the end said no. Being that they were teaching that in a class I'd assume that would be correct.