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Old 02-23-2005, 07:04 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Location: Long Island, NY
How often do you have sex?

How often do you all have sex?

I'm interested to see how often married people have sex. Everyone says it slows down alot once you get married. How many times is average?
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Old 02-23-2005, 07:37 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Me and my wife have a young child, but I would say that we probably have sex about 2-3 times a week. I think we are around the average, sometimes we will be a little above that mark but I think we at the average. So I'm not complaining at all.
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Old 02-23-2005, 07:39 AM   #3 (permalink)
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not married yet (7 months to go), but have lived together for 1 1/2 years, but we engage in some form of sexual activity about 4 times a week
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Old 02-23-2005, 07:49 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Hello,

While talking about another issue, I referenced this survey by Durex, which has some stats on frequency of sex.

Durex link
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Old 02-23-2005, 09:17 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Location: canada
been together 5 years now (some may say might as well be married)....and I'm looking at about once a month. That's not by my choice though......just the gf has no interest what-so-ever. This is a definite decline though from when we first started dating.

...and yes I do accept pity!.....haha
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Old 02-23-2005, 09:23 AM   #6 (permalink)
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it varies. sometimes we go for weeks without. then sometimes, once or twice a night for a week straight.

it could be a hormonal thing.
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Old 02-23-2005, 09:34 AM   #7 (permalink)
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ebbs and flows. we have been married for a little over year, and together for more than 3 years. we seem to have a pretty good natural rhythm in our sex life, in that sometimes we have sex everyday, sometimes twice a week, but we always have ENOUGH sex, and it is always very high quality.

what i will say, is that we have a very very good relationship that sex is only part of. we do a lot of other things such as eating out, weekends away, going out drinking / casino nights, shopping together, hell just sitting around talking about things until 3 in the morning. what i am trying to say is dont confuse frequency of sex with intimacy, its only a small part of what makes up this interesting road of living your life jointly with another person... i think to assess a marriage, or your marriage, you have to look at the whole package.
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Old 02-23-2005, 10:05 AM   #8 (permalink)
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if your SO has no interest in sex, TAKE HER OFF OF BIRTH CONTROL FOR A WHILE! geez, you guys, you're SUPPOSED to be shagging your brains out while you're young!

anyway... oh... four times a week engaging in sexual activity is pretty normal for me and Martel. sometimes more, sometimes less, but we always make sure it's fun and loving! suscribing to porn-by-mail helps too!
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Old 02-23-2005, 10:07 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Location: Long Island, NY
Quote:
Originally Posted by nowthen
ebbs and flows. we have been married for a little over year, and together for more than 3 years. we seem to have a pretty good natural rhythm in our sex life, in that sometimes we have sex everyday, sometimes twice a week, but we always have ENOUGH sex, and it is always very high quality.

what i will say, is that we have a very very good relationship that sex is only part of. we do a lot of other things such as eating out, weekends away, going out drinking / casino nights, shopping together, hell just sitting around talking about things until 3 in the morning. what i am trying to say is dont confuse frequency of sex with intimacy, its only a small part of what makes up this interesting road of living your life jointly with another person... i think to assess a marriage, or your marriage, you have to look at the whole package.
very well said. and very true!
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Old 02-23-2005, 10:08 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Location: Long Island, NY
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sage
if your SO has no interest in sex, TAKE HER OFF OF BIRTH CONTROL FOR A WHILE! geez, you guys, you're SUPPOSED to be shagging your brains out while you're young!

anyway... oh... four times a week engaging in sexual activity is pretty normal for me and Martel. sometimes more, sometimes less, but we always make sure it's fun and loving! suscribing to porn-by-mail helps too!

hmm...sure you don't know me?? lol... that exactly our problem..that god Da**D B/C patch... she used to be into it like... daily.. now..she wants it in her head, but can't get her body into it...
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Old 02-23-2005, 10:11 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tres
How often do you all have sex?

I'm interested to see how often married people have sex. Everyone says it slows down alot once you get married. How many times is average?
Married about 2 years.

Has gone down significantly, from 10-15 times a 7-day week to about twice every two weeks. I think it's been close to 2 weeks since the last time.

The progression is gradual. You may not detect it at first.

I don't have much sex, but the emotional bond is stronger by the day.
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Old 02-23-2005, 11:12 AM   #12 (permalink)
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I've been living with my g/f for about 2.5 years or so. Long term relationship for sure. I think we average out to about 3-4 times a month right now. But like others said, that's just one part of the intimacy in a relationship.
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Old 02-23-2005, 11:18 AM   #13 (permalink)
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Not enough. 1-2 times a week, married, 1 kid, both work full time with different schedules. We both want it more frequently, her probably even more than me, but its difficult to find the time.
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Old 02-23-2005, 12:31 PM   #14 (permalink)
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My wife and I have been married for a little over 4 years. We no pattern or regularity to our sex life. Some months we may have sex 8 or 10 times, and others we may only have sex once or twice. Most of the time it's just spontaneous and depends on our moods and how tired we are.
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Old 02-23-2005, 12:36 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Location: Yonder
Married 9 years (coming up on the ol' decade pretty fast there!) together for 13.

We probably have sex of some sort a couple times a week. When we first met it was an every-chance-we-get sort of thing, but we've mellowed.

Look, let me put this in perspective: When we met I was a 17-year-old college freshman. She was an 18-year-old college freshman. We don't do ANYTHING as much as we did back then, INCLUDING sex.
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Old 02-23-2005, 12:52 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Location: West Linn, OR
well, since i'm single, and don't get out much, i have sex about once in a blue moon. with a g/f, it usually starts off with having sex everyday/every time we see each other, then drops to a couple times a week. i don't really know what "normal" would be considered. having too much sex is practically impossible, and not having enough sex is more of a personal/relationship issue where it will vary from person to person.
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Old 02-23-2005, 12:56 PM   #17 (permalink)
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We probably average about 4 or 5 times a month. Been married about 12 years.
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Old 02-23-2005, 01:11 PM   #18 (permalink)
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1-2 times per week... usually.
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Old 02-23-2005, 01:11 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Last edited by insidious_machinae; 03-20-2010 at 10:31 AM..
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Old 02-23-2005, 02:01 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Location: Michigan
Married ten years, dated for three before that. At least twice a week, regularly more than that. Our jar with the pennies or whatever they say about being married doesn't apply. I'm still VERY attracted sexually to my wife, and plan to be for the next 10 or 20.
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Old 02-23-2005, 02:19 PM   #21 (permalink)
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Location: Philadelphia, PA
I've been with my girlfriend for three years, four months, and five days now.... We don't live together and we're both seniors in college so we're too busy to have much sex nowadays. Add to this the fact that our schedules are totally different and she also has an off-campus job.

I think if on average we have sex twice a week we're very lucky.
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Old 02-23-2005, 02:39 PM   #22 (permalink)
 
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Been with ktspktsp for going on 11 months now, and whenever we're around each other with any regularity (e.g. when we lived together for 5 months before he got a job), we had sex pretty much every night. It probably averaged out to 5-6 times a week. Now that we are three hours apart and only see each other on weekends, we still average about 5 times a week!!

But I guess this will decrease over time, as it seems that most long-term couples (married or not) experience this phenomenon. I enjoy all the sex that we do have right now, but I understand that with increasing obligations of work and/or family, we'll have to limit ourselves as time goes on.

I have a question for all you married folks, though: how often do you have quickies? ktsptktsp and I find that we can have pretty good sex in the span of a few minutes sometimes, which keeps us going when things are busy... but maybe this isn't practical with a family?
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Old 02-23-2005, 04:47 PM   #23 (permalink)
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Location: Charlotte, NC
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sage
if your SO has no interest in sex, TAKE HER OFF OF BIRTH CONTROL FOR A WHILE! geez, you guys, you're SUPPOSED to be shagging your brains out while you're young!

anyway... oh... four times a week engaging in sexual activity is pretty normal for me and Martel. sometimes more, sometimes less, but we always make sure it's fun and loving! suscribing to porn-by-mail helps too!
Birth control isn't always the culprit and going off of it isn't always the answer. I'm on birth control, I want sex daily and yet my significant other doesn't. So I guess my answer to the original question is: not often enough.
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Old 02-23-2005, 05:17 PM   #24 (permalink)
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Wow, I love being young I guess, I would say at least 10 times a week. Sometimes more.
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Old 02-23-2005, 05:30 PM   #25 (permalink)
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Location: Prince George, British Columbia
2~3 times a week here with my wife and I. Sometimes less sometimes more, so ya average. As a man I always want more and more... but my hands can take care of that problem!
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Old 02-23-2005, 06:08 PM   #26 (permalink)
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my girlfriend and i have sex 3-4 times a week. i'm not sure how that ranges on the normality scale
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Old 02-23-2005, 06:13 PM   #27 (permalink)
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it will be three years soon and now we have couple month old baby, so i would have to say no enough. she is still trying to get over that i dont look good after having the baby thing.
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Old 02-23-2005, 07:01 PM   #28 (permalink)
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We've been together for a little over a year now and I'd say on average we have sex about 5 times a week. Except for when we are both really busy with classes and such then it goes down to about two times a week.
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Old 02-23-2005, 08:55 PM   #29 (permalink)
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Married for almost 9 years and I would say we have sex about 3-4 times a week. That's when she's off birth control. On birth control it averages about 2-3 times a week.
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Old 02-23-2005, 10:20 PM   #30 (permalink)
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1-2 times a day, unless one of us isn't feeling well.
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Old 02-24-2005, 12:01 AM   #31 (permalink)
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My wife and I have been married for 10 years and were having sex for a year before that. When we are together it's 3-4 times a week. Right now we have spent 15 months apart and only see each other every 3 weeks (for a week at a time) and we go it at it like rabbits.
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Old 02-24-2005, 12:35 AM   #32 (permalink)
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With my last girl, it was about 1-3 times a week depending on if we saw eachother on the weekend, but now that I'm single...ZIP!
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Old 02-24-2005, 03:49 AM   #33 (permalink)
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I'm single now so the answer is as often as possible, though still not enough. If possible I would have sex at least once a day (usually more).

When I had a long term girlfriend I would often have sex once every other week or once a month. For some reason it just wasn't a big deal then, but I guess I have been sexually liberated now lol.
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Old 02-24-2005, 08:11 AM   #34 (permalink)
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Location: Regina, sk, Canada
in the last 6 months since the baby was born, 2.5 times. It technically could be 3 but since she had to end it short before either of us could climax I consider it only a .5 time.

It's been almost 2 months since last now
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Old 02-24-2005, 08:51 AM   #35 (permalink)
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Location: Long Island, NY
Quote:
Originally Posted by angeltek
in the last 6 months since the baby was born, 2.5 times. It technically could be 3 but since she had to end it short before either of us could climax I consider it only a .5 time.

It's been almost 2 months since last now
that certainly puts alot of peoples frequency in perspective huh?
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Old 02-24-2005, 09:42 AM   #36 (permalink)
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Lets see.. we've been together almost 10 years. 4 years dating 5 years married. During the first 4 years she would get bummed out if we didn't have sex at least 3 to 5 times a week. We got married and had a child right away. For the last 5 years I'm lucky if I get it once every month or two. We both work and now have 2 kids so a lot of it is a time issue. Plus she's had a hard time loosing the baby weight. She's not big, but not small either and it's something she's very self consious of. I tell her all the time I think she's sexy and beautiful, but until she can loose the weight I think it will always cause a problem.
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Old 02-24-2005, 10:08 AM   #37 (permalink)
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Location: Over Yonder
Been married for 8 years. We have 4 children. As someone so eloquently put it. (ratbastid)...We don't do anything with the frequency we used to. I liked that, and it is so true.

It just depends on so many factors. I feel fortunate to have sex at all. It is just not easy to work 50+ hrs a week, take care of 4 kids, do projects on a 100 year old house, homeschool, plus all the other family obligations. Hell.. who has time for sex?

I think about it a lot more than I get to do it.

When it happens.. it happens.

To answer your question...some times twice a week. But most of the times once a week is the avg. lately.

It's all good!!
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Old 02-24-2005, 10:10 AM   #38 (permalink)
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I'm single and not in any kind of committed relationship but even so I do pretty well--once a week or so. I have a regular lover and the two of us have lots of fun together. I'm very much into casual serial monogamy--meaning monogamous sexual relationships without any other strings attached. It's become quite handy as an outlet. I've got another possibility lined up if/when this one goes to the wayside.
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Old 02-24-2005, 10:34 AM   #39 (permalink)
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I hate to be the first, perhaps only person to say this, but...

not often enough...
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Old 02-24-2005, 10:43 AM   #40 (permalink)
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Not often enough. This is my fault of course because I'm the girl. I wish we had sex more then once a month. Although it can't be that bad, but it feels like a month. He's always ready to have sex, but I'm usually not in the mood.

I don't know, I guess I'm destined to not have sex often.
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