madcow

It all makes sense now!

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dylanmarsh

Aside from the Red Sox failing and taxes, the one constant in my brief 28 years has been gay guys hitting on me. I'm not sure exactly what "it" is about my appearance or my personality but I would guesstimate that I'm approached or flirted with at least once a month.

Now, I normally take it as a compliment and quickly defuse the situation but there have been times where the guy will get aggressive. Case in point: My sister and her new baby came into town a few weeks ago and I decided to take her to restaurant in downtown Phoenix. I work at the state capitol and one of the senators owns a restaurant near-by, so I decided to take her there. I was dressed up for work (suit, silk tie, polished shoes, etc) and met my sister down at the restaurant. Unfortunately, I was the first to arrive down there and asked to be seated while I waited for her to show up. Immediately after I sat down, the waiter comes runnning over take my drink order and then lingers there for a moment, trying to make eye contact with me and then left. Before he could get back with the drink, my sister shows up. Now, one would think that if a guy is there with a woman and she has a newborn in tow that that guy is probably not gay. Nope, for some odd reason he kept making passes at me, so obvious that my sister started poking fun at me. Finally, after eating, I get the check, pay with a credit card and get a copy of the CC receipt complete with the waiter's phone number on it. I suppose I wouldn't mind this attention if, A) I was gay, or B) some girl, any girl would be this friendly/aggressive towards me.

The one thing I can take away from this constant is that I have learned to truly sympathize with our lady friends who probably have to deal with this sort of harrassment nearly every day.

Any how, that's my story.

Val_1

Well, I wound up at an after-bar party this weekend and... after I looked around, I noticed there weren't really any girls there. Boy, did I get hit on alot. "Are you SURE you're not gay." I was asked about 6 times. Funny. I guess I'll have to ask more questions about the next party I get invited to.

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I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.

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dX927

I never have but my friend came close one time...no it really was my friend, not me saying "my friend" and meaning me lol. My friend visited me at school to work security at this event and somehow wound up arm wrestling this gay guy. I don't remember which one of them won but my friend said "Yeah, I've got a big cock," to the gay guy and he sorta just made a weird face and then walked away. I was seriously waiting for the gay guy to start flirting with my friend even just jokingly but didn't. My friend had no idea the guy was gay lol.

Eight

Yep, well I think so, by a old work collegue, was never quite sure if he was serious or just messing around.

MoonDog

I was actually sexually assaulted by another man when I was a freshman in college. I did something that was bad enough to get my ass bounced from school and got caught by a student patrol. The guy was probably a junior or senior. When he and his partner caught me, the other guy was told to go away, that he'd "handle it". Then he calmly explained that I had some options, and I could let him blow me or get kicked from school.

Well, by the time my pants were dropped, I kicked him in the stomach with the point of my foot and told him that we could forget that this ever happened, or I could go to public safety and file assault charges, then go to the university to file harassment charges. He told me to get the fuck away while he was gasping for air...glad I had pants around my ankles, cuz I would have probably driven my foot right through him otherwise. I don't think I've been horribly scarred because of that experience...but it was scary as hell for a 17-yr old guy from a rural community.

On a much lighter note, I was a cheerleader in college. As luck would have it, a cheerleader that had left the squad looked a lot like me, and shared the same name. He was widely reputed to be gay, or at least bi. There were often cases of mistaken identity. The best of those was when I was at a fraternity party. There I was with all my friends, wearing my cheerleading squad jacket and drinking my face off. A girl across the room caught my eye because she had on a very tight shirt with many buttons up the front, and it accentuated a VERY large chest.

Well, I was quite entranced for the whole party because every time I caught site of her again, she had unbuttoned a button, until a very generous amount of cleavage was exposed. After a couple hours of this, I was standing with my friends when she came over and started dancing pretty close to me. Pretty soon, her dancing became more of a "standing lap dance" on my crotch, at which point it dawned on me that she might be interested in me. I should point out that I was always very clueless with the ladies - they always had to hit me over the head, because I would miss all the "signals".

Anyhow, we ended up having sex at her place, then walking to my place for more sex. Then we hooked up the next night for more sex. Then we broke it off. Turns out she had seen me and mentioned to her friends that I was cute, only to hear that I was that "gay cheerleader" and that she had no chance. She then bet her friends that she could get me interested, which leads to the events I described above with her magically unbuttoning shirt!

That was one experience where being identified as gay really helped me out!

K-Wise

^ You lucky lucky lucky bastard! Was it everything I've dreamed about?

Asta!!

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lindseylatch

I had my brother's friend say he thought I was gay cause I had short hair...and I never got hit on with the short hair, so I guess some other people might have assumed the same thing...but I don't think a girl ever actually hit on me.
Then, the minute my hair reaches shoulder lenth, bam, I get a b/f.

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"If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him."
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MoonDog

Yea, that actually was a good story from my college years. I have a bunch of them, although 99.9% don't involve me getting laid, because I spent most of my time in relationships.

Of course, I would have lots more stories to tell if I hadn't passed out so often while drinking...

MoonDog

She was also on the university's student council during the next year. It was funny reading about her in the paper and thinking, "Yea, I've been there, done that."

But enough thread hijacking - this is about non-hetero encounters, or near-encounters :-P

jay-g

MeltedMetalGlob

I have a story to contribute: I was hit on once way back in college. This guy, who was black and weighed about 250 pounds invited me to a gay & lesbian film festival. I declined, saying that didn't interest me. Then he wanted to know if I had a girlfriend, and at the time I didn't, therefore he thought it was open season!

Apparently he thought homosexuality was like religion, and could "convert" people if he could present it logically. He tried explaining that if the room is dark, and you can't tell if a girl or guy is blowing you, then it doesn't make a difference. He was somewhat aggressive in pushing the fact that it shouldn't be knocked if it hasn't been tried.

Not being swayed by his sense of logic, I remained loyal to being heterosexual. He finally ended the conversation by asking if I wanted to know if he found me attractive. I declined once more, because:

1- If he said I was attractive, I'd feel even more creeped out.

2- On the flip side, if he said I wasn't his type, then I'd feel insulted at having been rejected by the other 50% of the population.

The shame of it is that he was a decent fellow, really. As soon as the conversation went THAT way, though, it made me glad I wasn't in prison.

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Ourcrazymodern?

Oh, I thought that said "sans huevos". Good idea, bumping this thread. Crazy & not at all logical. I'm not qualified to comment here.

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BE JUST AND FEAR NOT

Shadowex3

Once or twice, never got further than a surprisingly non-awkward "Not gay - my bad" exchange. Personally I usually just took it as a compliment.

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levite

Great thread bump!

I've actually been hit on way more by guys than by girls. Apparently there is a type of gay subculture that calls big, kind of hairy guys like me "bears," and thinks they are the bomb.

I found this out many years ago, during college, when I had a summer job at a bookstore on the Third Street Promenade in Santa Monica. I used to take my dinner breaks out on the Promenade, to watch the buskers and whatnot, and almost every day without fail, I'd get hit on by some guy, usually kinda ripped and blond, surfer types. I'm sure if I were gay they'd be awesome. And I took it as a compliment, and was always polite when I told them I wasn't interested. But it did kind of get to me that there was this stream of dudes, and I couldn't seem to get a chick to look at me.

Finally, toward the end of the summer, this one dude hit on me and I actually said, "Look, man, I'm really flattered, but I'm not gay. But listen-- you see that girl over there, with the red hair and the tight jeans? Whatever it is that you see in me...could you go tell her about it?"

He laughed, and took it in good form. I wish he'd told that girl, though. She was smokin' hot.

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Dull sublunary lovers love,
Whose soul is sense, cannot admit
Absence, because it doth remove
That thing which elemented it.

(From "A Valediction: Forbidding Mourning" by John Donne)

cj2112

I grew up Long Beach, CA, I was a teenager in the 80's. Long Beach has and had a very large gay population. It also apparently has a very large gay pedophile population as well. I got hit on, by middle aged men at least 3 or 4 times a year from the time I was 12 until I left when I was 21.That was pretty creepy. The guys my age that hit on me didn't creep me out in the least, I wasn't interested, but that didn't mean I couldn't be that persons friend.

Plan9

My self esteem!

This has never happened to me. I don't know... is that bad?

I assume it is because women generally don't find me attractive.

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Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

Sheepy

i's be more interested in gay people talking about being hit on by straight people. reckon there would be a lot better stories in that

Shadowex3

Having a non-trivial number of gay friends the answer is not really. With them it's more sad at how disrespectful some people can be, most interesting stories are just asshole stories about people that are convinced they can "convert" or "fix" them.

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Chumley

In this day and age, I think if you characterize it as anything more than someone you're not attracted to hitting on you, it's kind of... old-fashioned. Can I gently suggest: if you think it somehow denigrates your masculinity, or is some kind of insult, well, you're not really getting where it's coming from - that response is all about you and your stereotypes and has nothing to do with where the impulse came from to make the comment in the first place. Attraction works the same for straights and gays, for the most part. The same people are often hot to both. Hence it's pretty much a compliment and it's good to be nice and polite about it as you decline, or indicate a lack of reciprocation, what-have-you.

I've had gay friends of many stripes, and have been hit on various times by members of the pink team (I'm apparently the "bear" type <guffaw>), and I'm comfortable enough with my own identity to have fun and even tease a little, just for fun, while maintaining a 100% confidence in my sexuality. It takes a while to get there, but you need to start opening your mind, if it makes you really uncomfortable.

For your consideration, respectfully.

EDIT: Plah, so I'm responding to a 6-yr-old thread? LOL, gotta stop doing my reading here at 1 in the morning. Also didn't see p.2. Retiring....
EDIT 2: On Sheepy's angle, I have actually successfully hit on an avowed lesbian (she was surprised she responded), and recently found out the girl I had a crush on in junior high wound up coming out later for the pink team -- that explains her indifference <holds head in hands>.

chinese crested

A bi-sexual woman tried it on with me at a party - can I borrow your lighter (which was on my lap) and she picked it up with a brush of the hand. I was uncomfortable - I was in the middle of skinning up - and she did try everyone of every gender - nobody finds the desperate attractive I think.
We did know a chap who was so far in denial..... he told us when he went to the states he got picked up by a football coach who shoved a dildo up his arse and it hurt. My friend said how much did he shove in. answer All of it. BUT he insisted he was straight. His denial about who he was may have prompted his alcohol fueled woman beating. He could take on papillions - kicked his girlfriends one across the room. Thankfully she dumped him - which is more than she did when a beating left her peeing blood. Nice lady, deserved better. Whatever you are, you should be true to yourself. A wonderfull compliment from a gay friend when we were on the tube in a group, I had been nodding off and he thought I was asleep. He said to one of his friends (who had a crush on him) 'If I was straight, I would marry her'. I took that as a compliment. Never told him I had heard it.
Had a chap in the pub I worked in who couldnt work out why when he was being friendly and playing pool with guys and drinking with them, they got upset when he said he was going home to his wife and his dinner.
Well, we said. You are wearing a lumberjack shirt, have a flat top. Man comes over to you, offers you a drink, spends the next couple of hours playing and watching you lean over a pool table buying you more drinks - of course they are upset - you have been leading them on. hee hee
It wasnt that it was a one off - it was a regular occurance. Pretty boy, but not totaly bright.

Sheepy

Short and simple. I like it.