How do you stop an erection? (old title: strange)
 

how do you stop boners because i get them way too often. =\

Think about hot steamy lesbian sex between Janet Reno and Linda Tripp.

The question was how to STOP them...

Happens to everyone, sometimes at awkward times. Can't really do anything about it, just know that you're not alone in your problem.

If you feel horney, I think it best(in my personal experiance) is to stand up. I dunno it's just whenever I stand up I begin to calm down. Also "rubbing on out" often makes you less horney during the day etc

Funny story
 

My friend's sister is a nurse. They had to put a catheter in a teenage boy. Well, two young nurses was too much for this boy, and his soldier was saluting. You can't put a catheter in like that, so the boy said hold on, picked up the phone, and called his mother. Problem solved.

Damn... I thought your friend's sister was going to give the guy a handjob... That would have made mine go down. :eek:

Erections are normal. Get used to them and don't let them bother you. If a woman calls attention to an erection, suggest that she help you with it. :) Best case, she will. Worst case, she'll get upset and show herself to be immature. You can laugh at her if she does that. You have my permission.

Get married.

:D I think the comment above this one is the funniest I've read on this site so far... Great work fhqwhgads! :D

LOL great comments above.

Easiest way to stop them if you cant get away for a min. is to think about other things, I think about football.

If you can get away go take a piss, it's physically impossible to hold a rigid boner if you're pee'ing. Plus that tends to be a partial cause of them (morning wood anyways), your body knows it has to hold it in, and an easy way to do that is to get hard, as said above you cant piss with a boner. It's just natures way of making sure you dont piss inside a girl instead of ejaculating.

i always just think really hard and tell it "not now go back down" if i do it hard enough before its hard enough itll go back down.

I think that would stop my erection.

To quote Austin Powers:

"Margaret Thatcher nude on a cold day."
"Margaret Thatcher nude on a cold day."
"Margaret Thatcher nude on a cold day."

:lol:

This oughta do it:
http://epguides.com/HeyVernItsErnest/cast.jpg

Roseanne Barr nekkid. [insert Pac-Man 'Game Over' jingle]

thank you for making my day
:thumbsup:

Wait a tick... so that time I was groped at my old job by a coworker pressing his boner up against me and I told him to fuck off when he asked me if I wanted to "help him with it," I was just being immature? Gee, I thought I was being sexually harassed... shows what I know!!

Oh, and to end your erections, think of her:
http://au.geocities.com/shgames/fat-woman.jpg

if you're a medic, i think you just violated your hypocratic oath... i'm blind!!!!!!! (and yet strangely, my palms aren't hairy... go figure. <shrug>)

When i was younger, and firing guns scared me, i used to think about shooting guns, and the sort of fear that was associated with it...boner went away quick :)

I think there's a slight difference between a light joke and actually pressing it up against a girl. Denim never said to announce and press a boner against people, but to just make a joke if it's called to attention.

Let me try that paragraph again...

[SARCASM]Wait a tick... so that time I was groped at my old job by a coworker pressing his boner up against me and I told him to fuck off when he asked me if I wanted to "help him with it," I was just being immature? Gee, I thought I was being sexually harassed... shows what I know!![/SARCASM]

Better? :D

well if you're in a hallway and it happens instantly, do the 'lean-and-feel-sick' bit. Just place a hand against the wall, lean a bit (this conceals it), and just keep your mind clear for a moment. If someone asks, just say you got a cramp in your foot or something.

There's no real way to get rid of them. Just have to live with it.

Out of curiosity, what's sparring these 'tent-poles' ?

Sar... casm? :confused:

This is by far the most amusing thread I've read this week. One way to make 'em go down if you can't control it mentally, is exercise. When I used to get random uncontrollable erections, I'd find a private area (haha private) and do maybe 10 pushups (not always feasbile depending where you are). It diverted the blood flow elsewhere, and voila. Also healthy.

Boners are cool, he heh he heh

/Beavis

I can't believe I'm saying this... pull your penis up and tuck it under your belt/waistband. It won't hurt and it'll disappear in a minute or so, and until then it's invisible.

just make sure your tshirt doesnt get lifted for any reason...

Sorry Suave, but I found this funnier than FHQ's quip about getting married!

I can't mentally rid myself of the image of a man doing pushups in a store room with a whacking great erection!

Look Ma no hands!! :lol:

Glad to be of service. ;) (it's true though ^^)

I haven't had one in about 10 minutes, is there something wrong?

Dude, we all get them, and there's nothing you can do other than moving it, or taking care of it!

Sex change?

This thread is full of awesome and deserves to be bumped.

Personally, I think I risk permanent impotence with mine - thinking of Dick Cheney rubbing one out with Kim Jong Il watching.

hahahahaha zing.

Just crank one out a couple of times a day. That usually does it for me.

Find yourself a Congolese sorcerer.

http://www.leafpile.com/TravelLog/Ro...g/Extruded.jpg
Don't forget the fennel.

watch out for WK...

he's on a tear about bumping older threads...