sex during pregnancy
 

Has anyone here had a hard time wanting sex while your wife is pregnant? This is our first chile and all I can think about is that I am invading his "space". I love sex and have not had any desire for the past 3 months since she has begun to show. Am I crazy???

Yes, you are crazy. Pregnant women are sexy! Afaik, theres no harm or danger to the child until very late in the pregnancy, so go ahead, odds are you won't be able to get too many more chances like that.

I've heard that some women lose all interest in sex once thay have the child. I hope this doesn't happen to you.

Your attitude is not crazy, it's quite common from things I've read. Now that your wife is showing, it changes how you are seeing her, from a sexual being, to a mom...

Check with her doctor if you want your mind put at ease, but sex during pregnancy is perfectly safe even up til the 9th month (in fact then it's been said that orgasms can reduce both the amount of time in labor and the intensity of the contractions)

(THere's a line in Sex and the City about sex during pregnancy, and well, what if he's really huge, won't he hurt the baby - -the response back was- well where do you think dimples come from? - -Not exactly true - but dimples are very cute :)

My wife has not yet started to show she just ended her 3rd month but I would like to say I am a fan of her pregnancy hormones sex has been much more frequent and much more intense. I do not think I will have a problem once she starts to show but I will find out for my self in a couple of months.

After about 5 months I lost all interest in sex, even in porn. Of course that probably had something to do with stress and anxiety of being a dad. If my wife were to get pregnant again I'm not sure how I would react, probably not as badly. I still don't find pregnant women sexy though.

Don't worry about it from a physical standpoint; you won't be poking the baby in the head or anything. It is a common mental reaction to have your libido drop; you can get past it if you want to. Spoon position could work for you at first, since you won't be 'face to face' with her abdomen. Personally, I liked to rub her swollen belly at the same time.

I hope you are still showing her plenty of non-sexual affection?

OMG the sex was great for the first month - all the time - the the sicness came in and the sex stopped for 10 months - then blue balls set it - But yea its great and no problems with sex during prego. Some say towards the end sex with orgasim (hers) can induces labor. so go for it.....

I don't think he's worried about the physical aspects of having sex with her while he's pregnant, it's the psychological hurdle that he's trying to get over.

I'm right there with ya. It's like having sex for the first time with the dog in the room...it's just...strange. While I doubt that your son will come up to you one day when he's 12 and say "hey Pop, thanks for the scary visual while I was baking in mom's womb", I can understand your trepidation. (ooohhh..."trepidation". triple word score)

"The cirvex is tightly shut, the penis never goes in there... or else the baby would fll out."

- My SO... she's so usefull

True, very true... I guess that's why we're all only childs... :rolleyes:

Fortunately, before a child is born, he can't develop memories, and therefore won't come back at you later in life and kill you with a machete becasue you spooged on his head before he was born.

Sex is fine as long as she's comfortable. Seems about 50/50 on the hormones - my wife was a machine, whereas some friends of ours, the wife shut down when she was pregnant.

And your semen contains a hormone that will soften the cervix, making birthing easier.

Yes I know that I cannot hurt the baby, and all of the physical stuff, but just knowing that she is carrying my son in there and that soon, I will be a first time father, just freaks me out. I have tried to get past it but it is not happening. Thanks for the advice though, I really appreciate it.

And Yes I have been giving her ALOT of non sexual contact and Love!

If it makes you feel any better, your dad more than likely was banging your mom when you were in the womb. Pass on the family tradition.

Never wanted sex more than when I was pregnant.

same here.. i wa sa lil nympho the entire time i was pregnant...i couldnt get enough of it.. ill never forget wanting to hurry up and have sex b4 i went into be induced because i knew i wouldnt get any for a while... i practically raped my man the morning of the doctors visit..lol

and both my kids are fine.. except my oldest.. his forehead has a slight dent.. i knew i shouldnt have had sex with that black guy.. kidding!!!!!!

LOL that was funny
Also it tastes a little diferent when your wife is pregnant.

Its all good until you feel a little hand in there!!!

Sex during pregnancy is awesome. My wife became an animal during the second trimester. Plus, women get enlarged/engorged in all the right places and it makes sex all the more intense. Take advantage of it while you can. After baby, it'll be a long time until either of you wants or gets any!

I'm sure you're not long enough to put a dent in the child's head. =P

Me and my fiance had sex up until my 6th month of pregnancy. And our baby turned out just fine.

Yeah, there's really no risk to the baby. However, after the baby is born you will be sleep-deprived for a while and your sex life will suffer for a bit.

My wife is 8 months pregnant now and she's had absolutely NO interest in sex during all of her pregnancy. Problem is I have :-(. First three months she was sick as a parrot all the time, next three she just wasn't interested. We did it a couple of times but it wasn't much of a success. And now she's a bit too big for it to be practical. After the birth you shouldn't do it for a couple of months either. I might as well become a monk.

Hmmm.... I think you are wrong Mr. SelfDestruct. There have been several cases where fetal memory has been proved.

Ok - this is not on topic:

My wife is studying ...(hm... have no good word for child support services) -and read a paper on a mother who was abused by her man during pregnancy. To calm her self down the mother listened to "Pan pipe moods". She got away, gave birth. When the child was 9 months old she (the mother, not the child) was upset by something and put on her "Pan pipe moods". The child immediatly got terrified and crawled for shelter in a corner.

So... I don't believe the child is disturbed in any (bad) way during sex - but fetal memory can be proven.

(I talket a lot to my daughter before she arrived - after a tough birth she relaxed immediately when she heard my voice...she stole my heart that moment)

Oh.. I had plenty of sex with my wife during her pregnancy - I loved the way she looked.... I find most pregnant ladies more attractive than non-pregnant ladies.

As stated before, sex was great while pregnant. Just think you don't need to worry about BC! We have 4 children and had sex while she was preggers each time. We had sex the day before one of them were born, one of the nurses said it would help the contractions along, don't know if it did or not. You just can't move around as much the further along she gets, but it's all good.

Unfortunately, my wife lost all interest in sex while she was pregnant. Sad, since I found her so intensely sexy. :|

I'm eight months along and still having sex. :)

The problem is finding a good position with my big belly, otherwise its great. :p

My wife and I had sex literally up until I took her into the hospital for a (scheduled) induction (2nd child actually....baby was 2 weeks late). She was a machine with all 3 of our kids during pregnancy and I dont know why but I just loved going at it with the basketball in the way :)

Sammy

I share your pain. My wife is only 6 mo pregnant, but it's with twins. No sex at all because she is afraid of going into labor. I have two other boys and have gone through the same thing every time. The wife loses all interest in sex when she is pregnant. I unfortunately don't and it can be rather frustrating. :(

I too am in the same boat. My wife is 8 months prego, and already has a ripe cervix. Baby on the way SOON!

my question is, how long have most waited till they were up and at it again? (assume there is no c-section or episeotomy

With my first son, it was a good bit longer than the second. My wife had a very hard time adjusting to being a mother and wife on top of the depression. By the second round, she knew what to expect, so she started the anti-depressants earlier. With my first son, it was about 3 months after he was born before we had sex. I was a real jerk about it and put pressure on her. That made things much worse, even after we started up again.

The second son, I completely backed off and said to let me know when you want to. That was the smartest move I ever made. My second son was born July 27 and while we were on vacation the second week of August, she basically jumped me. She isn’t much of one to initiate and that was one of her most aggressive times with me.

I’m playing it cool again with the twins, but don’t have the same expectations of the time frame, as I’m sure labor will be much harder.

Most doctors want you to wait at least 6 months before having sex. Tears or episiotomies can make it take longer. We just had a baby and we had sex up until about a week before.

Although I still enjoyed it, I had trouble getting as turned on as I normally would. I just didn't find her as attractive at that size. It helped if I bent her over though because the pregancy wasn't as obvious. Of course I never let her know that.

Are you sure it's six months? That seems a bit long for a normal vaginal delivery. I do have to say that my wife is a baby machine. First boy, labor was 1 hour. Second boy she got up in the middle of the night and had him 45 min later. No tears or trouble. She is really amazing. I don't know how she does it. I'm afraid we won't make it to the hospital for the twins.

I hope you're being funny. Myself, I found my wife to be more attractive the bigger she got. Pregnancy really made her shine. And a lot of women look really good pregnant for that fact. I find myself looking closer at women that are showing, to see the "glow", it turns me on.

Sex is not only based on looks! My wife is great looking pregnant or not. Don't really see how it could be wrong.

An old friend of mine wouldn't do it either, as he considered it "feeding the kid"

My wife had sex throughout both pregnancies. She was quite eager towards the end when she learned that semen contains some prostaglandin , which is a lipid used by doctors to induce labor.

I find pregnant women pretty attractive. Maybe it's the primal instinct that they have already been found suitable by another male as a good mother, maybe it's because they were attractive before and I just don't see her pregnancy as detracting from that, I don't know. If it bugs you, don't concentrate on the belly, concentrate on the woman. Also, keep in mind that there's no better way to boost your wife's self-image than to continue to have sex with her during a time she feels she's getting fat, unattractive, feels like crap, etc.

My wife is usually on top anyway, but she carried low with our boys and found she didn't get the penetration she liked during the last few months, so we found a new position. She lays on her side and raises her top leg, you straddle her lower leg and enter her sideways.

As far as waiting until after birth to resume sex, I was born vaginally and with an episiotomy, and my younger brother was born 11 months later. You do the math.

Let me also echo what others have said about inducing labor with sex. For our first son, we took the Bradley classes (I highly recommend them, above Lamaze). They advocated it as a way to relieve stress and start the ball rolling if she goes past her due date and is up for it.

-Mikey