cj22009

Phyz I truly do feel for you I know all of your frustrations and sadness I just went though a divorce it will be final for a month tommrow. I have two kids also 3 and 6 just remember they come first no matter what she does or says. My marriage ended because of her infidelity plus other things it wasnt all her fault but that was the reason I left but remember life does go on and things do get better with time and man if you ever need anyone to talk to shoot me a pm

Dale Kemp

This will sound cold, but in my experience, it is more than likely true. Your wife finds her relationship with you pretty dismal. She has to go to school (because she aspires to better things), work full time, study, take care of two kids, and she doesn't get many emotional strokes from you. But she does get hit on at work and that makes her feel attractive again.

So she wishes she could be free of all the stress and load your marriage means. I don't even know what to suggest to help here. She will miss the kids, and you, after a while at her sister's, but she will also remember how depressing the load of responsibility was. She probably won't come back.

I would recommend that you start preparing to get the kids. Talk to a good lawyer. Hide money, in unknown accounts. Take your photo albums and such and store them somewhere safe.

Then court her. She wants so to be courted. To feel young, attractive, free and happy again. If you can help her with this, then you'll stay married. But she's already 98% out the door, so you are about out of chances.

The kids are hurting by now, becuase they have sensed the stress, depression, and unloving feelings. Try to protect them, if you can.

God bless you.

__________________
Trueheart

theburner

Man.. I have been following this thread since page 1, and my heart goes out to you. It can be extremely painfull to your ego when something like this goes down, and that can hurt your recovery.

Please remember.. This isn't you, it is her. It is her ghosts that need to be exorcised, not yours. Keep your head high and love your kids like nothing else. The rest should fall into place.

__________________
Take Off Eh!

xim

How is her sister? Do you think her sister would take reasonable care of the children if she felt obligated to? Because if you arent worried about them getting mistreated by the sister then I would let this go. When the child (wife) wants to go out and party over and over and keeps leaving the kids with her sister (fluffing responsibility off on her sister that she normally would fluff of on you). Her sister is only going to put up with it for a while, a shorter while than you would, then she is going to let her have it. Moving in with her sister serves the purpose of being free from obligations to you while still having someone to clean up after her and be the grown up. Her sister will not let this last.

And on that note, maybe you should start showing her sister some attention. Dont hit on her, just when you pick up the kids, talk to the sister (maybe even more than you wife). Get to talking personally to her and vent (not angrily) to her about what your wife is doing to you. 1 this will make her fucking jealous as shite. and 2 if you can bring her sister to your side even a little bit, it will be very fruitful. Her sister has heard a totally different side of this and probably has very little concept of how much of an irresponsible child she is being. So right now your sister-in-law is probably trying to be supportive of her and just encouraging her and telling her its okay to be a child.


Maybe you should just print this whole thread out and give it to her. I dont know if that one would do any good, it would at least make her realize how much of a bitch she is being.

__________________
If I could be anyone in the world I would be Britney Spears. Shes in so many commercials about pepsi... www.ximcity.com

kutulu

Good idea. She should see what other people think of how she's acting.

kajagoogoo

Probably not, with all the hiding of the money suggestions!

kutulu

Well if he hasn't actually hid any money he has nothing to worry about!

Irishguy1

Man it is so wild that I read this thread tonight. I normally only logon to look at the titty board, but since it is gone I decided to look around a bit. I to am from Broken Arrow, Oklahoma. I have just gone through an extremely simuliar situation. I have been married for two years and have two children with my wife. She has done many of the things your wife is doing. I just filed for divorce last Friday, my wife signed a deal I offered her just today. I put myself through alot of unnessacery pain trying to make our relationship work and bring her back home ,counseling, church, quit drinking, the works . My advice to you: [B]File for divorce Immediatly![B] The sooner you decide this is not going to work the better you will feel every day. Get your children! If she decides she wants to divorce you and speaks to a lawyer, he will tell her to get physical custody of them and do not let you regain it. There is nothing you can do about this until you can get into court, and she will have an advantage over you. She is cheating on you! I am sorry to tell you this, but it is true. It is over the quicker you move the more chance you have to keep your children safe. She will get tired of this lifestyle and either try to screw you or crawl back home, either way you lose. You have a good chance of getting custody at this point, but that can change in an instant. And if she crawls back home and you take her, she will never respect you, and she will do it all again, maybe in three weeks, maybe in three years, she will feel as if you will always be there to take care of the kids and to take her back no matter what she does, just a fallback for when her "friends" are no longer there for her. PM me if you want I will be happy to tlk to you and support you. I can also give you the number to a very good Lawyer.

kutulu

I fully agree with that.

el3ment

wow. marriage is scaring me now, i'm soon to be married.. good luck with everything and again 'stay strong'

__________________
-ron

phyzix525

Well folks its been a few days now. To clarify some things, I am moving out also. I cannot stay where I am at and I am packing everything up and putting it into storage. I am moving into my parents house for now.

We have talked about our problems a few times now and what I am getting from her the most is that she is upset that I never went to college and that I am not dependable financially. I have had a lot of jobs in the past and its not like I am lazy, but the jobs just never seem to last. She feels that she will never be able to come back to me cause she cannot trust me and depend on me. She has also said that she just wants to see other people now too. I have made a deal with her that if she will go to counciling with me and it still does not work out I will be willing to get a divorce. But if she does not go, and she just gives up without trying then I am not going to be nice and will not co-operate. She said some things that were really hurtful when we were talking and I have to think that she said them just so I would get mad and want to get divorced too. That way she is not longer the bad guy. But its just so hard being alone. I have only a couple friends cause I was always working or watching the kids that I never went out. the places I have always worked at were with older people so I never met anyone there. So now having someone to go talk to is hard. Seeing her everyother day is really hard too. I just want to hold her and love on her. I don't ever want to go to bed cause I hate sleeping by myself in a cold small bed. Really the only thing keeping me from killing myself is my kids. I love them so much and I want to see them grow up. But I never thought it was going to be like this. I feel like such a pussy. I have not cried in years and now I can't even watch my kids without breaking down. You never really notice how much sex in on TV till your not getting any. I don't even know the last time I got sexually excited. Damn depression sucks.

Everyone says i should leave her and move on, I just don't know how to do that. I am going to have to see her almost every day. I love her so much I don't even care if she is doing this to me. I thought a couple weeks ago that I was prepareing myself for this to happen one day, man was I wrong. But even as I write this I just wonder how much of it is love and how much of it is my not wanting to be alone.

Sometimes I just wonder if I could leave and just walk away from the whole thing. kids and all, just move out of the state and never think about it again. seems sometimes like the only way I could do it.

__________________
It's hard to remember we're alive for the first time
It's hard to remember we're alive for the last time
It's hard to remember to live before you die
It's hard to remember that our lives are such a short time
It's hard to remember when it takes such a long time

denim

I hope you won't do that to your kids. You sound like a good man caught in a meat grinder.

kutulu

I know you feel like that, but you shouldn't. It's a tough time and it's hard to accept change. There is nothing wrong with crying, except for being ashamed about it. Time heals most things. Hopefully this whole experience will make you a stronger person in the long run.

Personally, I'd be planning on ways to get even with her. Things like sleeping with her sister, friends, anyone she knows that would sleep with you. I'd also try to make it as obvious as possible to anyone who would listen that SHE is the bad one here. I'd try to salvage some sort of vengance I could while also making sure that you get the kids and SHE has to pay child support. That's just me and I can be mean when I'm betrayed.

EDIT
I want to amend that a little. What I basically meant was that I'd go for an all out emotional assualt on her. Doing whatever I could do to hurt her emotionally, however, I'd leave the kids out of it.

Maybe some sex would help you out. I konw it's not as easy as it seems but with the internet there are so many easier ways to hook up. It's only temporary comfort but it might make you feel a little better.

About working, do you have a realator's license? You mentioned selling model homes. There is huge money in real estate and it doesn't require college. My brother in law went from barely scraping by to a half million dollar house in the span of about a year and a half. How would that be for revenge? Hell, if you had full custody of the kids you could be making a shitload of money AND getting money from her for the kids!!

phyzix525

I was talking to her today and she was saying that my threat of taking the kids is ok with her. She needs her time to get her school work done and so on. She was telling me how she wanted a few things now like the washer and dryer and the king size bed. She said she was talking to her friend who went through a divorce and how she was able to get the things she wanted by trying to go after the things her husband wanted. So I told her I would make it really easy, I said that I will get everything except for what I give her. If she does not like that then I can let her have the kids and I will just pay her child support, which she knows she cannot do and still go to school. Also I said if she wants to let me have the kids that I would file for child support. She has not done very much homework cause she was suprised when I said that and she said well you can't get much from me. I said that you have to pay support before you get anything. So she just changed the subject.

I was doing better today thinking about what it would be like to date again. Kissing a girl for the first time. That feeling you get in your stomach is something I have not felt in a while. But then I had to see her tonight and it all went down hill from there.

Some advice for you all who are not married, think long and hard about it before you do.

__________________
It's hard to remember we're alive for the first time
It's hard to remember we're alive for the last time
It's hard to remember to live before you die
It's hard to remember that our lives are such a short time
It's hard to remember when it takes such a long time

phyzix525

Why not. God damn it. Why can't I been the one who is imature and irresponsible. Fuck why do I have to be the one that gets fucked over? She is ruining my life, why can't I ruin hers?

I picked her up to get the crib from the old house today and I was asking her about when she is planning on moving into the 2bed deplex, and she was complaining about how expensive it all was, and I told her she should move back in and we could get counciling. I said I know you were happy at some point in the last 4 years. And she said something along the lines of no not really. Which pissed me off. She told me how great this past week as been for her and I just lost it. I yelled a her for quite a while about everything that came to mind. I was just pissed. It was kind of nice to finally get it all out. This weekend has just been really really shitty for me. Anyway I was so upset that I walked into out old bedroom where the bed was still there with our sheets still on it and I just broke down crying knowing that i will probably never sleep with her in that bed again.

The thing that really gets me the most is that she does not even miss me. Even her sister has told me she has been in a good mood. She told her that she wishes I would just get a girlfriend so I would just leave her alone. I just don't think she cares about me or the kids, otherwise she would have stayed and tried to work something out.

Well I am off to try and get drunk tonight. thanks for listening

__________________
It's hard to remember we're alive for the first time
It's hard to remember we're alive for the last time
It's hard to remember to live before you die
It's hard to remember that our lives are such a short time
It's hard to remember when it takes such a long time

denim

Just don't take your anger out on your kids. They aren't responsible for her BS.

phyzix525

Fear not good people of the TFP.

I had a good talk with my parents (first time since this all has really happened) and they have talked some sence into me. I am going to get myself back into college, or actually just take a few business administration classes at the local community college. I want to start a coffee shop. It also just so happens that my Dad knows a guy who started one in dayton OH a year ago and has made good money from day one. So I thinking as soon as I get my house cleaned out that I am going to take a drive up to OH for a week or two and work with this guy. I can also see my brothers, a sister and my grandfather while I am there. And see a buckeye game. It would give me a goal to attain and something to look forward to.

For the first time a a few years I really think this is what I am supposed to do. Also I am going to keep the kids, my parents said they will do anything they can to help with them, and my mom said she would practically raise them herself if I would go to school. I think it would be best for the kids to stay here at my parents house at least untill my wife is done with college, and then we can figure it out from there.

Its getting late so off to bed I go, and for the first time in a few weeks I am not depressed thinking about it.

__________________
It's hard to remember we're alive for the first time
It's hard to remember we're alive for the last time
It's hard to remember to live before you die
It's hard to remember that our lives are such a short time
It's hard to remember when it takes such a long time

KirStang

That's good to hear man. Keep your head up. Glad to know that your life is taking a direction

xim

Heres some advice that has been very good to me in the past. While your feeling UP, write down why. Make yourself write like 2 or 3 pages about why things arent so bad and it will really help you keep that mindset. And it is the mindset to keep.

__________________
If I could be anyone in the world I would be Britney Spears. Shes in so many commercials about pepsi... www.ximcity.com

adam

I am overjoyed to hear that your parents can help you out... keep up your support network! You will make it. Going back to school is a good idea. Best wishes!

wvmoose

Not much I can add, except to love those babies, and best of luck to you friend. It is true that it is always darkest before the dawn. I have a good feeling you are going to get through this. Many, many others have. It is part of the human condition. Godspeed to you and the babies....

el3ment

wow, thats good.. going back to school should also help keep your head off things.. you might find that new someone too anyways good to hear your parents are holding your back.. props to them. just take all that love that should have been for your wife and give it all to the kids.. it will help a great deal. keep us updated

__________________
-ron

imkeen

Yeah, its absolutely fantastic your parents are going to help you out with your kids and emotionally. That is the best for the kids and for you. Bravo!

phyzix525

UPDATE:

Almost moved out, A few boxes and odds and end type stuff left.

We celebrated my birthday (the family) by going out to eat last night and she came along. It was the first time since all this started happening that she was nice. She actually sat down on the chair with me and touched me some. It was nice, but I was able not to freak out after she was gone like I was doing a couple days ago every time I saw her.

I am leaving tomorrow for OH. I am going to take my camera and get as many pics of coffee shops as I can to get some ideas for mine.

Let me run an idea by you all. What do you think of having a table or two in the cafe that tilts up so you can use it to draw or sketch. My brother is an art student and he said he would like a place where he could go take his stuff and do some school work. Also I want to get these chairs that are like the ones at Barnes and noble, but in leather, that have a stainless steal thing that comes out from the arm and sits over your lap so you can use your laptop without it sitting in your lap. Just a few ideas, but I want something that could set me out from all the other cafes.

__________________
It's hard to remember we're alive for the first time
It's hard to remember we're alive for the last time
It's hard to remember to live before you die
It's hard to remember that our lives are such a short time
It's hard to remember when it takes such a long time

denim

The chairs and tables sound like Good Things, but pricey.

bonehed1

Get the chairs and tables...so many coffee shops I have been to have those and they are busy as hell and they just set the mood for relaxation in the place and do so much more business then starcraps, I mean starbucks. GL with your woman but if it was me I would say to take her down and make her ass suffer. I am going through a divorce now and she took off with my daughter without me knowing. Now she will fill the wrath of a man who wants his daughter back (1 yrd old) and she will be crying till the cow's come home. BRING ON THE PAIN!!!!!!!!

__________________
Stuff is Good

el3ment

woohoo, it's been a long ride.. hope better things are ahead for you

__________________
-ron

Schwan

How are things going, I wonder? I hope all's well.

phyzix525

Well I am back from Ohio, and I started my new job with Sprint PCS Tech support. So I have been training nights and its alot to learn, so I have kinda not had to deal with anything other then that for the most part. But things are still right where they were, just sitting in limbo waiting to get with a decent therapist. Its still hard and I still want things to work out, but things are looking bleak. Trying now to concentrate on the things I did not like about her so I am not so depressed.

I am almost to the point of just wanting some closure so I know whether or not I can move on. Right now I feel if I were to go out and hook up with someone it would ruin my chances of getting back with her.

__________________
It's hard to remember we're alive for the first time
It's hard to remember we're alive for the last time
It's hard to remember to live before you die
It's hard to remember that our lives are such a short time
It's hard to remember when it takes such a long time

dksuddeth

phyzix, I couldn't find where it said how old your kids might be in this but I'll give you a point of view that you might need. If your kids are old enough to see whats happening and be affected by all this then you have the only reason you need to be the mature and responsible one in this. I'm a stepfather of two kids right now who dealt with their parents divorce at the age of 6 and 8. They remember everything and when they truly need something important then they come to their mother and I, we were the responsible and mature people.

On the topic of missing her and stuff, its alright to feel that way. You loved her, still do most likely, and missing her is quite natural. What you will have to do is acknowledge that its over and grieve about it. Theres absolutely nothing wrong or crazy about feeling that way. The sooner you accept that its over and that its ok to be upset about not being married to her anymore then the sooner that you can go on with your life WITH your children.

You will need to move forward and take care of your emotions and mental state quickly, because if you are not ok with yourself, you will not be ok with your children and your children will start being 'not ok with you'.

I wish you the best of luck in moving forward and getting your business together. take care of those kids. You will be amazed at how much more important they become to you.

phyzix525

UPDATE:

Kinda made a mistake last night. I was at a party and I ended hooking up with this chick there. I am not sure that it was a good idea, but I was just sick of everything and just wanted to reasure myself that I still have it, ya know? But really I think it was all about getting back at Jessica. She told me that she has her eye on some guy from work and that she has a crush on him or whatnot. I don't even know why she told me. But now if we do get back together, I kinda doubt that I will ever tell her about this.

__________________
It's hard to remember we're alive for the first time
It's hard to remember we're alive for the last time
It's hard to remember to live before you die
It's hard to remember that our lives are such a short time
It's hard to remember when it takes such a long time

Flyguy

She told you to piss you off, plain and simple. Not to rain down on you or anything, but hasn't she already slept with this guy she supposedly has a crush on? If she keeps going on and on about how she had a crush on him, she's already slept with him dude. (I'll tell you if my wife comes home night after night talking about how she has a crush on some other guy while she was living with me and being supported by me her ass would be out on the street so she can be with her special guy.) She just doesn't have the balls to come out and say it. And from what you've been writing in this thread, (and please tell me if you think I'm wrong because I don't know you personally) I don't think you two will be getting back together. So in that retrospect, I would'nt worry about you hooking up with a girl at some party. I'm willing to bet it made you forget about her and it helped you to realize that you have to move on and this chick made it a little easier for you. Personally, I wouldn't lead her on or anything because you're still on the rebound but I'm still willing to bet it did make you feel better.

Echodork

Ok, I need to get all of this straight. Your wife has done the following:

- Admitted to you that she is not attracted to you, yet she feels attracted to men she meets at the bar.

If you needed a place to start raising the red flag, this is it. Relationships are about attraction. You haven't had sex but 10 times in 6 months, yet your wife is fantasizing about other men when she masturbates. You don't need a therapist to see that there's something wrong with that.

- Dumped the kids off on you on multiple occasions so she can go out and drink with her "friends."

You're being used. You're a convenience, a babysitter. You're like her free ticket out of responsibility. She doesn't need to be a mommy, because daddy is willing to shoulder the burden while she goes out and downs daquiris with the guys from work.

- Made out with another guy on at least one occasion, and admitted to wanting to fuck him.

If my wife did this, she wouldn't be my wife anymore. There wouldn't be any forum posts or marriage counselling. She'd be on the curb with the kids and whatever she brought into the relationship, and no jury in the land would take her side.

- Lied to you about her whereabouts on more than one occasion.

Not even the most severe of her transgressions, but certainly a warning sign that your relationship is in trouble.

- Discouraged you from hanging out with (or meeting?) her friends in their natural environment (the bar).

Let me tell you what this means in plain English. It means "I want you to remain a concept, a vague footnote who I can blame for my sadness. I don't want my friends making a connection between 'my husband' and a real person, because then they will see that I am not as sympathetic as I make myself out to be in front of them." However, maybe I'm overanalyzing. Maybe it just means "The man I want to fuck is going to be there." Can you think of any acceptable reason why your wife wouldn't want you to hang out with her friends? I can't.

I'm sorry you've had to deal with all of this. There's a lot of good advice in this thread, and a lot of it involves ways you can move on with your life. Look, it sucks shit, it really does. But if what you're saying is true, then your wife does not want to be with you. Your wife is the one laying down all the terms of your relationship... you're always accessible to her, she's never there for you. You take the kids when she wants to go get drunk. You pack up her stuff for her. You agreed to switch jobs to one with a schedule that would accommodate HER job. I mean... come on, man. This woman has your balls in a vice grip. Are you getting anything at all out of this relationship? Maybe you're only telling us the negatives, but from where we're sitting, it looks like you're just being stupid by refusing to see the truth.

Talk to your lawyer, get things in writing, sign papers, get the process moving. If things stay on course, the day will not be long before she comes to you and says that either she has met someone else, or that she wants to sever the connection completely. The best thing you can do at that point is reach into your briefcase and hand her the papers, already documented, already signed. You need to be the one to take the first move. She already dictates the terms of the marriage... if you let her dictate the terms of the divorce too, you'll be working three jobs and eating ramen until your kids are 18.

phyzix525

Well she is now planning on a trip out of town with some "friends" on the weekend. which is her only time she works, so there is got to be a good reason for her to be going, like some guy. Well unfortunatly it looks like this thing is over. I guess its time to get lawyers involved.

As for only telling you the negatives, well to be honest I tried come up with positives about her and all I got was that she was my kids mother and she was my wife, those were about the only things about her I like right now.

The frustrating thing about her going away for the weekend is that I asked her for some help cause I did not do very well the last time I was by myself with the kids for the weekend and I just wanted a little help. She said it would be fine and then all of a sudden she is going to give up all her shifts to go away for the weekend. Oh well I guess I will just have that girl over for the weekend instead.

__________________
It's hard to remember we're alive for the first time
It's hard to remember we're alive for the last time
It's hard to remember to live before you die
It's hard to remember that our lives are such a short time
It's hard to remember when it takes such a long time

theburner

Phyzix.. She is using you plain and simple. My assumption is because you are such a nice guy that she feels she can get away with it. Also, it seems like she goes out of her way to hurt you to make herself feel better.

1) Get a lawyer. FIGHT tooth and nail for custody, and I mean FIGHT DIRTY. If you get custody, she has to pay child support. That is a win/win for you.
2) Immerse yourself in your child. Don't think of her as a painful reminder of what could/should have been, think of her as part of your support. I don't know about you, but when I hold my son NOTHING is wrong in the world.
3) Don't be used any longer. If you need help with your child ask your parents. They have been there, done that. Nobody loves children like grandparents. BTW, while the first couple of times can seem daunting, once you have a routine for your daughter is gets 100 times easier.

Keep your chin up and and put your back to this whole situation. It is time to move on. Your ex seems to get off on playing with your emotions, and you are allowing this to happen. DON"T.

__________________
Take Off Eh!

avhg1

Couldn't have said it better myself. If your parents don't live close, try to find another support net that doesn't include her.

__________________
I shake the devil's hand daily... I'd do it hourly, but my hand gets tired.

DaDictionaryBoy

Okay, so I wrote something else based on stuff you wrote in post 30-something but changed my whole post because a lot has happened to you. And I am really sorry for you--it's about as shitty as it gets. Whoever said you're a great guy in a meat grinder was spot on.

Some advice:

1) Get on the divorce papers. And get the children. You are a responsible forward-thinking guy with a drive to succeed. And your children need a role model like that in their lives. You have a great set of parents and a great support network. The offer is out there for your mom to care for her grandkids. Take her up on it. Your two daughters (?) are the most important thing in the world, not something to stick with each other as a punishment. You mentioned wanting to love and protect them--this is how to do it.

2) Don't hook up with anyone until all this is over. If you get caught or word gets back to her that you're with someone that will come back to haunt you in the divorce. (Unless OK is a no-fault state...) Even if OK is, if you want the kids, you want to be as squeeky clean as you can be. She's already admitted to you, your sister, her sister and who knows who else that she's after other guys, doesn't want to be with you, etc. She moved out on you. She left. That's a strong legal position to be in. It's less strong to ALSO be guilty of breaking your marriage vows.

3) Work on this coffee shop idea. Put your energy into it. It will give you something to do to occupy your brain and will give you something completely your own when you're done. When you start to lose motivation, think about how she said she didn't like you because you didn't go to college and couldn't keep a job (big words for someone still in school, btw)--use your anger to motivate you to prove her wrong. Make sure you research the market in the area you want to start your business in. A little shop opened up right next to my office just outside of the downtown core of Denver and they are going gangbusters. They set up free wireless internet access and there are ALWAYS people in there. And it's a tiny place with maybe 5-6 tables and chairs. They managed to get into a space in the bottom of a new loft building and they have built-in clients. Another shop 4 blocks away changes hands and goes out of business every 4-6 months because they are on a one-way, 4-lane street with crap visibility. And by the way, the tilting tables sound like a great idea--think about a rim or a little indent to allow the people to rest their pencils/brushes there. Try the local vocational school or community college and see if you can get a fabrication class to build them. Gives them a project and you'll get a custom table for WAY less $$$$.

Okay...this post is getting out of hand.

You're a REALLY strong person in a really shitty place and I admire the heck out of you for owning up to the maturity required as a husband and a parent. It's too bad your child-bride couldn't see what she had. Her loss. Someone else will.

phyzix525

I live with my parents. The only thing about getting full custody is having to take care of them all by myself, without her help anyway. I cannot rely on my parents for very long. I just don't know if I could do it. I want to be that 21 year old that goes out to bars too ya know? I was only 21 when I met her, and i did not get it all out of my system either I don't think. So having to kids all on my own is something I don't know if I can handle. Also taking them away from their mother may not be the best thing for them either, no matter how much I want to make her suffer or whatever. So I think that for now this is just going to have to be the way its gonna be.

Get this, she is thinking about quitting her job at the bar and she wants to get a job where I am working vause it pays well. She asked if it would be to weird, and I did not really care cause I think she is going to be better off here then there, but i think it might get weird if she finds a boyfriend here or something. I would hate to loose my job for kicking someones ass.

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It's hard to remember we're alive for the first time
It's hard to remember we're alive for the last time
It's hard to remember to live before you die
It's hard to remember that our lives are such a short time
It's hard to remember when it takes such a long time

xim

That-fucking-bitch
I dont even want touch on that.


But it just hit me that (from my uneducated opinion) it seems like this forum thread would be great court evidence against her. A few pages of Clear, dated documentation of everything she has been putting you through on a day by day basis, what more could you ask for?

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If I could be anyone in the world I would be Britney Spears. Shes in so many commercials about pepsi... www.ximcity.com

theburner

Phyzix.. You seem like a really nice guy, so I am going to be real blunt here.

1) By having kids at this stage in your life you will never be the 21 year old kid that goes out and gets hammered. You signed that right away the second your child/children were born. This isn't tough love, and I am not trying to be a dick. Face facts.. Your main responsibility is to your children/child. If your parents can watch the kids (prearrange this) then go have fun. Otherwise, YOUR ONLY responsibility is to them. You should have thought that you can't handle kids before you did the horizontal shuffle. Too late pal, YOU HAVE TO HANDLE THEM NOW.
2) WAKE THE FUCK UP! I know you love this girl, but EVERYONE else that has replied has told you she is the anti-christ. If you want to give her your sack and whipped and cuckolded for the rest of your life stay with her. If you want to have a healthy relationship and mental state, RUN LIKE YOUR BALL HAIRS ARE ON FIRE.
3) File for divorce, state her comments about not loving you and going after other guys as the reason the marriage is disolving. Fight for custody of the kids. You sound like you are the responsible one, so take your kids. By the sounds of this woman, taking the kids away from the mother IS THE RIGHT THING TO DO. Adoption is your only other choice.
4) DO NOT LET HER GET A JOB WHERE YOU ARE. She is trying to torture you or control you. Either way this is bad.

Man, I am not trying to be a dick, but by the tone of your emails you just don't seem to get it. I understand fully that emotions can clog your rational thought processes, and that is why I am being as blunt as I can.

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Take Off Eh!