Mile High Club tips?

[Redlemon]

My wife and I are taking late-night coast-to coast flights this weekend, and our toddler is staying with Grandma. This is probably our best chance at gaining membership in the Mile High Club for many many years to come.

So, does anybody have any tips for pulling this off, especially in the highly security-minded post-911 world we live in now?

Also, how far do you have to go for it to "count"? Are handjobs enough? Insertion? Orgasm?

[Church]

How to do it nowadays, I'm not sure, but I think in order to be fully initiated, there has to be some sort of penetration.

[maleficent]

I'm looking really innocent here....

Bathrooms offer the most amount of privacy. However, they are tiny, doesn't offer any freedom of movement. PLus the lighting is atrocious, and there's that whole smell thing. Plus, there's usually a line.

You want to be in the back of the plane - in a three seeater with just the two of you. but not all the way in the back, you'll be too close to where the flight attendents are -- on a 727/737 somewhere around row 27 - make sure it's not an exit row) On a Super 80 -- Row 19 or so works.

It's preferable to not have anyone in the row in front of you for noise reasons.

(if you use the kiosks to check yourself in for the flight, you can pick the perfect seating)

Evening flights the cabin is darkened.

Whatever you do -- do it after the beverage service.

Blankets, at least two.

Blowjob under a blanket is easy.

Best position, seated with woman on top is easiest to pull off.

Be quiet.

For it to count, you have to be at least 25K feet (some will say 10K but -- eh)

[Nunquam_Idem]

Why is it that they would have to be 25K-10K up for it to count? Technically, a "mile high" is 5,280 feet. And how would they know how high up they are? It's not like passenger seating has any altitude equipment :-)

But that's just me being technical. Never having joined the club (and likely never going to) I can't say I have anything more to contribute...

Best of luck if you guys try!

[Charlatan]

I've never been able to join the club despite all the flying I do... but I've given it some thought and would say that maleficent has it just about right...

If you do go for the bathroom for full insertion, I'd suggest to do it during the movie... less likely to get interupted and less likely to have a line forming outside while you are in... Personally, I'd choose the hand or blowjob under the blankets...

[maleficent]

Originally posted by maleficent

Best position, seated with woman on top is easiest to pull off.

Oh, and you also want to be closest to the window while in this position, calls much less attention to yourself.

...and first class -- not a good place to attempt it - the seats are not conducive to more than one person -- plus the fligh attendents are way too attentive.

[Bentley Little]

I am traveling down to Cancun this weekend for my honeymoon and was planning on trying the mile high club. Thanks for the suggestions maleficent. Until now, I was just going to "wing it".

[Blackthorn]

Originally posted by redlemon
My wife and I are taking late-night coast-to coast flights this weekend, and our toddler is staying with Grandma. This is probably our best chance at gaining membership in the Mile High Club for many many years to come.

So, does anybody have any tips for pulling this off, especially in the highly security-minded post-911 world we live in now?

Also, how far do you have to go for it to "count"? Are handjobs enough? Insertion? Orgasm?

Hey redlemon...please do report back and let us know of your success in this quest and if successful how you pulled it off so to speak!! Good luck!!!

[hossified]

i was always under the impression it was penetration till release. None of this handjob / blowjob stuff.......

[maleficent]

Someone had entirely too much time on their hands...

All About the Mile High Club

[amonkie]

Maleficent,

That site is a great piece of Satire! I smell a good April Fool's joke with that site in the future

[RiceGuy]

Just out of curiousity, what would happen if a couple were to be caught?

Obviously they couldn't be thrown off the plane, but would they be fined or banned from flying with the airline again, or would it be more of a slap on the wrist?

May be joining the club at the end of the summer, so I better find these things out now!


Note: Edited for stupid grammar mistakes.

[losthellhound]

Maleficent.. You seem to know way too much about this

[Averett]

Okay, I'm never using an airline blanket again

Yeah, and I'd say that just penetration counts. None of this blow job nonsense. That isn't really sex. Ask Bill Clinton and thousands of high school kids across the country

[maleficent]

It probably depends on how blantant people are being. I would honestly think that if your flight isn't crowded, and you aren't disturbing anyone, the flight attendents are going to let you alone.

If the flight is crowded, then well, it'd be stupid to try it...

Use common sense.

Red eyes were always good for that purpose.

[maleficent]

Originally posted by losthellhound
Maleficent.. You seem to know way too much about this

Ummm -- Uhhh-- Welll -- ya see--- -

I read it in a book! yah, that's it....

[losthellhound]

Originally posted by maleficent
Ummm -- Uhhh-- Welll -- ya see--- -

I read it in a book! yah, that's it....

I'll wait to read it in your journal

[Bentley Little]

Originally posted by maleficent
Someone had entirely too much time on their hands...

All About the Mile High Club

Did anyone read the "tales of the mile club" in the site. they all sound like tales from a porno mag.

edited for stupid error.

[ibis]

Originally posted by losthellhound
Maleficent.. You seem to know way too much about this

That's exactly what I was thinking!

[DEI37]

Sounds like fun to me! Tell us how it goes, and maybe even with visual effects!

[MSD]

Originally posted by Averett
[B] Okay, I'm never using an airline blanket again
[B]

One of my friends was reading some magazine (Cosmo, maybe?can't remember) and they had an article called "Confessions of a Flight Attendant." She said that you should never use an airline blanket, no matter what.

[Redlemon]

I'll let everyone know how it goes, don't worry.

I'm surprised that no one on TFP stepped up and admitted joining the club. If it weren't for maleficent's fondness for books , there'd be no real responses. Thanks M!

[maleficent]

That's my story and I'm sticking with it...

[Rlyss]

I had two chances at joining the Mile High Club. My girlfriend and I went on an interstate vacation and took a plane. On the way there we tried but were constantly nagged and observed by a middle-aged flight attendent who knew exactly what we were trying to do in the bathrooms, and kept an eye out whenever one of us went in there.

And on the flight home we were both too exhausted from our holiday that she slept the whole hour of the flight, and I watched the in-flight television.

But that would have been the greatest experience ever, joining the Mile High Club at age eighteen

[Pragma]

I haven't yet had a chance - I haven't been on a plane in several years, and was too young to know about it then. Nowadays, if I ever had the chance, I'd jump at it. That's something that I'd be very proud of joining.

[Dawson70]

I do not belong to the club, however, I was able to wittness another couple.
It was a redeye from DC to Milwaukee. The plane was only 1/3 full and I enjoy sitting in the tail section if I have my way. After we reached crusing altitude, people began shuffling around to the seats they wanted. Because so many where empty, the airline crew didn't seem to care.
The couple came back by me and were 2 rows across and down from were I sat.
To tell ya the least, the air crew did not seemed a bit fazed. They would walk back and forth and never said a word to them. I knew they saw them, because I would see the stewards laugh to themselves everytime they walked past.
The event took only about 10 minutes and most of that was preparing and building up the nerve I can imagine.
So my suggestion? If the plane is somewhat empty, GO for it!
I believe (this is my opinion) that the airlines have probably conceeded to the fact, that the Mile High Club has become an icon of our society. I can't imagine them turning you in at the gate, unless someone complains. SO keep your distance. Unless of course, you are sitting close to me........

[Captain Nemo]

If it is a red eye flight it is incredibly easy (especially if your girl has good kiegel control). Just lift up the armrest and assume the spoon position (obviously not lying down all the way). Insert and just go real slow and the motion won't even be detectable.

Been there, done that.

[Nunquam_Idem]

Wow. It would take more guts than I have to pull something like that off.

That and I don't think I could ever talk Milady into it ;-)

[maleficent]

Originally posted by UlteriorMotives
Wow. It would take more guts than I have to pull something like that off.

Putting on my innocent face:

Naw, guts aren't required, when I've (read in a book that it's been) done, it was an "in the moment" kind of thing. The plane is dimly lit, the engines are humming, it's quiet, you don't quite feel like sleeping.... soooo...

Doing it in the bathroom is what requires guts - cause that's just way up there on my nasty-o-meter... (it's all about the lighting)

[Captain Nemo]

I would think doing it in the bathroom would be extremely difficult these days, as that is one of the areas that the airline personnel watch like hawks in our new heightened security world

[Nunquam_Idem]

I tend to agree with Captain Nemo, security is just really high any more. No lines to the bathroom and multiple people/that sort of thing.

You'd really have to be really sneaky to get in :-)

I think we'll have to work on having our first 'out of the house' experience on the ground somewhere before we'll be trying while collecting our frequent flyer miles

[Nunquam_Idem]

Although I meant to mention, that URL that was given earlier had a bunch of airlines that were MHC friendly, so maybe check them out...

Mile High Club

[StickODynomite]

Hmm i'd love to join the mile high club I'll have to make sure to do that next time we fly during evening/night hours.

[Rinndalir]

Second the spoon position, it works great on a bus, it should be just the same on a plane

[Dawson70]

Ha ha ha ha....I'm glad someone else mentioned the bus. I didn't have the courage to do it. But what would you call Bus sex?
The Greyhound Grove?

[DEI37]

That's funny. The Greyhound Groove...gonna have to remember that one.

[Flyguy]

Originally posted by RiceGuy
Just out of curiousity, what would happen if a couple were to be caught?

Obviously they couldn't be thrown off the plane, but would they be fined or banned from flying with the airline again, or would it be more of a slap on the wrist?

May be joining the club at the end of the summer, so I better find these things out now!


Note: Edited for stupid grammar mistakes.

Coming from a pilot, it all depends on who catches you. If it's an old bat of a flight attendant who hasn't had sex in 10 years or so then she may get jealous and have the both of you arrested upon landing. If it's a younger one then she might let it go becuase she's probably done it herself. Again, it all depends.

[maleficent]

Originally posted by StickODynomite
Hmm i'd love to join the mile high club I'll have to make sure to do that next time we fly during evening/night hours.

Evening hours aren't going to get you an empty flight, the only really empty flights anymore, are the coast to coast red eyes -- where they have to get the plane back to the opposite coast for the next morning, so it will go with 3 people on it if needed.

[Redlemon]

Well, just to report back in, the closest I got was being fucked over by America West. I'm pretty sure that doesn't count.

All the flights were packed, and we were exhausted, and with a missed flight due to a late connection, we didn't even sit together on one of the legs. Thanks for the advice, though, maybe someday...

[Charlatan]

Ahhh the real truth of flying... sorry to hear it didn't work out...

I was just thinking... you could join the Mile High Club by going to Denver and having sex just about anywhere...