Need anal sex advice.
 

Ok, heres my situtation. My GF and i have tried to have anal for quite a while now. The thing is that i have a hell of a time getting in there. The inital peneration is a laborous process and out of 10 attempts or so i only managed to get in once. I take it slow and slap on loads of lube.
The main question is, when you guys tried anal for the first couple times, how did you go about it? What techinques did you use and what works for successful anal sex?

Tell her to relax, make sure she went to the bathroom before, and get the lube inside as well as outside.

Are you giving her enough foreplay?
You probably need to spend quite a while using your finger first, then working your way up to two, etc. In my experience, the first several times at anal, are a lot of work. it takes a lot of preperation.

try telling her to contract her muscles as if she is taking a shit. That should open up the outer sphincter muscle (there are 2 rings of muscles in the anus, one voluntary, the outer one, and one involuntary, the inner one. ).

I agree with Bamrak work toise fingers in for a wile till she loses'n up good. then go real sloooooww..

Patience is key. Took me many tries before it worked. And even though my girlfriend wants it, it doesn't mean it's always going to work. I'd say the most succesful of times come naturally. Things always seem to go wrong when we plan on doing it.

Best of luck!
-T

Get her a strapon and have her do you. This way she can see it isn't a problem and can relax.

just ram it up there. a small kink in the boner is a small price to pay for the smiting of her anal cavity

My advice to you would be to get her clitoris stimulated first... The closer she is to orgasm the more receptive her anus should be to taking in your penis.

Also, I'd recommend that you manually stimulate her anus with a lubricated finger so she can get used to the sensation of having something in there before you try pushing in your penis.

I've heard that stimulating a clit while inserting can actually bad as it can cause pleasure-based contractions and can tighten thigns up down there.

"push harder it ALWAYS goes in"

;)

just a funny saying, cept its true! lol

Okay, do not follow the push it harder advice. As a girl, I know that doesn't work, and you will just leave her in a painful, teary mess, which could cause HUGE problems for her later.

Anyhow, do it standing- in the shower. Somehow, it always goes in like no one's business in the shower, but we have trouble every other time we try it.

It's true. It's just a bad idea. One of the first times we did anal, I misunderstood what lurkette was telling me and I went harder and faster than was comfortable for her. It was bad. Don't do that.

Here's how it is with anal sex: When you're hot, you're hot. When you're not, you're not.

Actually, it's pretty much like that with any kind of sex.

Sometimes anal works, sometimes it doesn't. No biggie. With practice, it'll get easier and easier.

One at a time: Pinky, ring, middle... then thumb... all very slowly, lots of lube, get it ready. After thumb, go to two fingers if need be. If you take your time, it will stretch for you. Take your time...

Take your time. :)

that made me laugh out loud

I have to agreewith analog on this one..
Another thing I find helpful is if I just hold a finger or two against her anus and let her push ata rate that is comfortable for her.. or use a small dildo (made for anal) and let her insert it and get used to it while the two of you do other things.. Once she's comfortable with something else in there you can hold yourself against her and let her push until it's in.. then go slow.. slower then you ever thought necessary..

First off, try a hot bath or shower - this relaxes the muscles. Never done it but a warm enema also helps. Then, general stimulation, and gradual loosening of her ass - tongues, fingers, lots of lube. Have her push against you as you enter and try different positions.

Having said all that, some women are really too small to acomodate some sized dicks and you shouldn't force it.

I have to agree with this...as much as I love fingers and SMALL toys, I have yet to have a dick that didnt cause EXTREME discomfort.

Thats what you get for going after thoes big packed guys :p

Rubyee, I hope you (and everyone else) know that I was totally kidding.

I agree with all of this. Try going down on her while playing with it too, or even licking, and stimulating "it" with your tongue. It takes a while to get used to the feeling of something going in, so plenty of stimulation is a good practice. Lots and lots of lube. I highly recommend trying small dildos, or other toys for anal stimulation. Although, the bigger the toy, the better the joy. ;) (I just made that up!)

For serious anal play, I'd recommend an enema first.

You mean there really are women out there that have or like to have anal sex? I've never been with a woman that's into that.

It's always "Ewww, that's just so nasty" or "That's a one way highway!"

I have been with a woman who loved it and woman who don't and a couple that of the stars the moon and the barometric presser just so dig it.

The thing as I see it is if it is to work and be enjoyable all around the woman has to be in to it. If she is doing it just for you and is not feeling it herself it can only lead to trouble down the road.

Now to get there the hole pinky on plan is the way to go but know that on a given night you might not get passed the pinky.

Anal sex isn't spontaneous. You need to be prepared for it. I think toys are the way to go, and you definitely have to want to do it. No one likes to have his or her butthole surprised by something jamming into in unexpectedly.

Anal sex is one of the most pleasurable kinds of extended sexual stimulation, in my opinion, the more you practice, the better it gets.

It can be fun alone too. With the right toys. ;)

Go slow. Lube helps. Don't expect too much. It's more a mental turn-on than anything else.

UM... NO IT'S NOT.

the one time i tried it I only lasted the "instroke" so i have no words of wisdom.

wife no likey butt play.

If it ever happens to us, chances are it will happen by accident. Milady very likely does not like the butt play too.

I don't think it will ever be 'clean' enough of an endeavor to pursue- it just sounds kinda nasty to deal with the brown stuff and the smell. And I'm pretty certain we'll never be doing enemas, so that pretty much isn't something I can see us going for.

Best of luck for those who try it and like it though, I guess :rolleyes:

Shouldn't there be an 'Anal Sex' sticky by now?

I've tried it twice. Both times hurt like a bitch. Never again. I just dont get anything out of it at all.

what i really dont get is why keep doing it if its painful ? lol

no pain, no mess
all pleasure
never had it bad :)

Helpful link:
 

Ten Rules of Anal Sex

1. Anal intercourse is the least practiced form of anal sex
2. Anal stimulation, including intercourse, is not painful if done properly.
3. Anal sex can be enjoyed even if it has been consistently uncomfortable in the past
4. Two muscle rings called sphincters surround the anal opening. Each functions independently.
5. Anal stimulation provides many kinds of pleasure
6. Anal stimulation can lead to orgasm
7. Diet contributes to the enjoyment of anal sex
8. Different rules of hygiene apply to the vagina and rectum
9. Anal intercourse is not necessarily an act of dominance and submission.
10. Anal sex can be perfectly safe, even beneficial.

Seen some good advice here, foreplay foreplay foreplay is the key, using a finger..then maybe a second helps a ton... do her from behind for awhile and work a finger in her ass to get her ready for it... too much lube can make it too slippery to get in, some spit works better to get it started, you can always lube up after getting it in there for a bit.

My GF and I actually got a toy called the 'anal tool' it's a kinda stepped toy, slowly work it in step by step while doing other stuff and she's good to go come getting busy time.

Let her stick a finger up there, even if it's only the pinky, up to the first knuckle. That's enough to give you an idea of how good/strange anal feels.
Then, keep that feeling in mind whenever you try to put anything in there.

CHECK OUT NEED ANAL ADVICE A FEW SPOTS UP THE PAGE. I POSTED ONE THERE.

I didn't find a problem at all the first time my g/f and I had anal sex, which I attribute to her being used to the idea. I'd have a couple of months of introducing some light anal play before I even thought about intercourse, and she came to enjoy the anal play quite a bit. When we actually went for intercourse we took alot of time, had some slow "regular" sex first, lubed up, and did it laying on our sides so she could control alot of it.

I drugged her first.

I agree with the original king...

Hey Just take it Slow... If ya go too fast and it hurts then she will say no way... Lube is the other thing that ya need the most of and play there a lot get it ready to play.. it's like your first piece... Go slow... I can't say that enough...! As for some of the other advice... well take it for what its worth..

Low and Slow
Deep and Hard

Two words: Muscle. Relaxers. ;)