MooseMan3000

So, here's the situation.

I ended up by circumstance more than choice attending the same college as my high school girlfriend, who I had been with more or less four years. We stayed together while we were there, but in November or so I met another girl who I really liked. (She was actually attracted to my girlfriend, first, which is how I met her... heh)

So after a lot of emotional wrangling, I ended up with the new girl. She wanted to make it clear to me that it wasn't going to be an overly attached relationship, because she was afraid. She'd had a string of bad relationships, and she had been hurt a lot recently. She *said* that she wouldn't let herself get jealous if I were interested in other girls... but you can see where this is going.

Anyhow, I'm home now, and I'm finding myself attracted still to my old girlfriend. I know anything with her is out of the question, though, because we're strictly remaining just friends for the moment. I'm still with my new girlfriend, because she lives close enough that we can see each other weekly, usually. The problem is, I just talked to another female friend of mine, who I was always attracted to, and never really got the chance to act on it, because I was always with said old girlfriend. Now this other friend has expressed interest in me, and we left an indefinite plan to get together at least a few times over the summer, before we're both off at school again.


I probably don't really need to explain my dilemma (I'm sure you've heard it before ), but I will anyway. I really like being with my current girlfriend. She enjoys doing the same things as me (we play video games together... how cool is that?), and I think she might even like sex more than I do. My problem is, I'm getting into my "restless" phase, being at home in a small town, after my first year of college... I don't want to hurt my girlfriend, and I certainly don't want to hurt our relationship. The only problem is, I think the relationship might be hurt if I don't satisfy my curiosity, as well as if I do.

Bah.

So I just keep coming back to my thread title. I'm a horny jackass. I want to go fool around with other girls and still leave my current options open. It's not really fair to anyone involved, but I just can't get the silly thoughts out of my head. Damn me and my immaturity.

Well, anyway. I don't know what advice anyone can give. I'm not sure if I even need it necessarily, but I certainly needed to tell someone. And at the moment, nobody I mentioned in the thread is an option, unfortunately. Well, we'll see what happens. Maybe I'll just sleep on it. For like a month.

wilbjammin

You need to answer this question for yourself - "what is your goal in your relationships?"

It sounds to me that you don't really care about either of them that much, it is more like a mathematical game. If you're looking for something of substance you should approach the situation in a way that will give you substance.

You know exactly what you're doing, else you wouldn't say "Damn me and my immaturity". Take ownership of it, you are choosing to be immature. It isn't something that is happening to you. This is all in your hands. You need to decide for yourself what you really want and you shouldn't jerk people around in the process.

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Innominate.

MooseMan3000

I know that all. I honestly and truly love my girlfriend. I think she's fabulous to no end. And I truly want a good, honest, solid relationship with her. Which is why I don't think I'll act on my other impulses.

I'm sorry if it sounded like I didn't care about them. I truly care about them both. I don't want to hurt anyone, and I think I know how that can be done, but I can't help having my impulses. I've just been known to make bad decisions in the past, so I'm doing my absolute best to make the right decision here.

I know this isn't happening to me. Believe me, I know that this is entirely up to me. (Why do you think I'm having such a hard time with it? Heh) I just am having a terribly difficult time keeping my meandering, uncertain, probably shallow desires from invading my real ones.


Thanks for your honesty, though. I'm trying to keep honest, too.

doncalypso

MooseMan3000, it sounds to me like you're on a mission to sleep with as many women as possible rather than the fact that you're too horny for your own good.

If it was just a case of being too horny then you'd have reached a point where your current girlfriend couldn't take it anymore because she'd feel you sex her up too much. But the way it's looking (from my perspective of what you initially wrote) it seems like you're trying to make up for some perceived lack of experience with women or something...

When I first came to college I was on a mission as well. My goal was to compensate for all the experience I never got to have back home in high school, but in the end I only ended up getting played and having my pride and self-esteem shot to the ground in a million pieces.

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Sawfmonkey

Mooseman3000~ What's happening with you sounds EXACTLY like one of my friends. So I kinda know what's going through your mind. Just one thing of advice, decide by yourself how its going to play out. Don't bring your girls into it to make a decision...it will only create drama. ::hugs::

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Nova_Dust

Imagine your gf as someone else. That should bring out the fun.

Make sure you don't yell out the wrong name.

hossified

hey....id you can handle the guilt of cheating...or don't feel it's cheating.....than by all means go ahead. In all reality you're not gonna end up with a chick you met in first year university....and if you're having these feelings now...they are only gonna magnify.

Cosmo Girl

i think you need to think about whether getting experience with other girls is worth losing your girlfriend over. The fact that you are even thinking about it shows that you arn't completely satisfied with your current girlfriend. But if she is completely serious about being ok with you fooling around with other girls (i highly doubt it!) then i guess it's a possibility for you (if you wanna be a jerk). I'm curious whether or not you are on the rebound from your first girlfriend or if you are truely over her....4 years is a long time to be with someone. If that is the case it explains your urge to be with a lot of different girls....or maybe it's too soon for you to make a comitment after the end of such a long relationship? ....just a thought. After all....." I want to go fool around with other girls and still leave my current options open" doesn't seem like a person who is ready for a relationship or a person who even deserves to have such a great girlfriend in the first place! :P i mean seriously! think about what you have with this girl...don't mess it up....but if you do, she deserves better then you anyway :P ..." She'd had a string of bad relationships, and she had been hurt a lot recently"....hmmm maybe fooling around with other girls while you LOVE HER is not the greatest idea in the world huh? ugh men...:P

thespian86

Man, welcome to the club. You already passed the membership requirements so... well I guess you've done more then us. We bow to the king of RESTLESSNESS. Dude, this needs to pass or you need to show some restraint. Either or, stick with what you have an put the others in the spank bank.

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ratbastid

I ended up with the chick I met in first year of university. And it turned out I couldn't live with the guilt of cheating on her, though evidently I thought I could at the time. Don't cheat. It's a bad idea.

The only solution that works is the obvious one. You mentioned that you found your new girl by way of her attraction to your old girl. That should make the answer tantalizingly simple. One word: THREESOME!

Johnny Rotten

Good idea.

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Tuffy_McGee

LOL if you don't know which one you want then I don't think anyone can help you.

I'm suprised you think these ladies will let you go back and forth.