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Old 05-22-2004, 05:48 PM   #1 (permalink)
Kyp
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Location: Oregon
getting her to orgasm

I can never get my wife to have an orgasm during normal sex. I've tried everything I can that she's willing to try, and still nothing. She's not into doing anything with anything other than ourselves, ie no toys. I've tried using my fingers and my tongue, and both at the same time, and I just can't seem to make her have an orgasm. Any tips on what I could try to help her have an orgasm? She doesn't masturbate so she can't tell me what she likes in that way.
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Old 05-22-2004, 05:50 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by Kyp
I can never get my wife to have an orgasm during normal sex. I've tried everything I can that she's willing to try, and still nothing. She's not into doing anything with anything other than ourselves, ie no toys. I've tried using my fingers and my tongue, and both at the same time, and I just can't seem to make her have an orgasm. Any tips on what I could try to help her have an orgasm? She doesn't masturbate so she can't tell me what she likes in that way.

She knows what feels good brother. Communication is the key. Communication. I know that may sound kinda odd, but talk through it, dirty talk to spice it up until you both educate yourselfs on what she enjoys best.
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Old 05-22-2004, 05:53 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Location: Peetster's house.
I am sorry to say I know that you think this is your problem and indirectly it is.. but if she cant come.. and doesn't masturbate...She has a real real big problem.
Talk to her,Talk to her,Talk to her,Or buy her a vibrator.Use it on her and leave it in her drawer..she'll catch on.
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Old 05-22-2004, 06:08 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Tis tough to get the mind to shut off to relax enough at times.

Getting into that space requires some creativity.

Orgasms for some women, are 99 percent mental 1 percent physical so be a little creative.

If she trusts you -- light some candles, put on some sexy music (Jazz or Barry White or Johnny mathis would do it for me) - blind fold her, clothing is optional, but she doesn't have to. Have her get really comfortable, and read her some erotic stories, penthouse letters, don't touch her, just see where her mind takes her. Patience required.
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Old 05-22-2004, 06:45 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Location: Edinburgh
I hate to be the one to say this, but it sounds like she's not doing her part in bed. I've heard many women complain that their partners don't do enough to give the woman an orgasm, that they just care about themselves. In my experience, and talking to friends, I believe that most guys get an almost bigger thrill out of being able to give their partner an orgasm than out of having one themselves.

Anyway, if she doesn't masturbate (which I don't doubt), and she won't touch herself in bed, and won't tell you what feels good when you do it, how can anyone possibly win? She's got to be more open about this and if she wants an orgasm as much as you want her to, then I think she's got to step out of her comfort zone and just do it. If she wants an orgasm she's got to start touching herself and discover things about herself that most people discover when they're fourteen.
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Old 05-22-2004, 07:14 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Was this a problem before you were married? Has anything changed in your relationship that would affect your sexlife ? Maybe she needs some reinforcement that sex and orgasms with her partner are a good thing heck great thing.
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Old 05-22-2004, 11:51 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Re: getting her to orgasm

Quote:
Originally posted by Kyp
She doesn't masturbate
Yeeeahhhh, riiiiight.



Me neither.
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Old 05-23-2004, 04:35 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Location: Elysium
My dearest Kyp!

I strongly suggest that you make your lovely wife read this book:

Rachel Swift: "How to Have an Orgasm as Often as You Want"

communication is only gonna help like 30%. As most women who can't orgasm during vaginal sex is it because of a mental blocking. This book will help her overcome this and it'll introduce her to exercises that she must do alone in order to practise her orgasms in certain ways. Some of the exercises includes you so be helpful in that part!

Check the book out Kyp and trust me - it works!

And if you decide to give it to her then I strongly urge you to explain to her that the reason why you're giving it to her is not that she is terrible in bed (we don't want to give her the wrong impression and add to the mental blocking, now do we?). You've purchased it because you want to improve your sexlife and her sexual satisfaction
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Last edited by Nancy; 05-23-2004 at 04:37 AM..
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