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Old 04-26-2004, 09:19 AM   #1 (permalink)
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long distance

i've heard both sides to the long distance argument of whether it works or not. i'm curious to know if anyone out there has had a successful long distance relationship, or why they didn't work out. i'm considering going into one myself, and i could use some reassurance that it might work
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Old 04-26-2004, 09:25 AM   #2 (permalink)
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I've been in 2 failed ones, but I have seen people pull them off. Most of the ones that work are where the distance is only time limited, if its going to be going for quite a while, chances dwindle.

It all depends on how strong the bond between the people are. Only the strong ones survive.
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Old 04-26-2004, 09:28 AM   #3 (permalink)
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I've been burned once.

It might work. Like wraithhibn said you've got to have a good strong relationship. And there has to be a light at the end of the tunnel. No point getting into a long distance relationship with somebody unless you're planning on being in the same area eventually.

But like I said, burned once so I'm just a bit sour on these things...
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Old 04-26-2004, 09:45 AM   #4 (permalink)
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I agree that I think it all depends on you guys and how strong your bond is. I did a long distance relationship once and it worked, though we were able to see each other almost every other weekend. I have a feeling that if we weren't able to see each other for months at a time that it wouldn't have worked. I don't see how it could. If you've already been together for awhile and you have a strong relationship, then it all depends, but if you are just starting out, then I don't see how there would be a relationship to maintain.
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Old 04-26-2004, 01:11 PM   #5 (permalink)
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My boyfriend and I have been in a long distance relationship 8 months out of the 11 and a half we've been dating. We see each other every other weekend, but talk to each other constantly.
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Old 04-26-2004, 03:24 PM   #6 (permalink)
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be wary, the temptation of cheating is all to great *Sigh*... however, i'm at a point now, where i need to look at it from the point of view that, things may not work out at the time, however, if you two really love each other, things will find a way of working out, eventually...

I had a lot of people telling me it wouldn't work, and I'm a stubborn one, but it still wares on you. Just keep yourself busy and cherish the time you do have with that person.
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Old 04-26-2004, 04:16 PM   #7 (permalink)
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I had a long distance relationship that probably would have worked if I had been older. I started dating this guy when I was 16 and we dated until I was 19. I really loved the guy but he started talking about marriage and it freaked me out (being so young). Eventually we broke up...not because of the distance (he was in Arizona and I was in California) but because I was too immature to handle the next stage.
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Old 04-26-2004, 07:19 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Was the worst breakup I've ever had, and the pain/implications are still dragging on. The breakup helped trigger an onset into deep depression and anxiety. I'll always avoid LD relationships like the plague.
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Old 04-26-2004, 07:29 PM   #9 (permalink)
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my boy friend was in college like 19 hour drive away, 3 states away, but we were apart for 9 months and now we are living together and are happy.
We would call each other every night or at least tryed too.
A lot of calling card but he had free min. after 8 on his cell phone.
I was one hour behinde so it was only seven for me so it worked out great.
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Old 04-26-2004, 08:21 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Old 04-27-2004, 06:19 AM   #11 (permalink)
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I've been in a long distance relationship for the past 6 months. The next 4, he's home from school, so we'll be closer, but I'm not looking forward to September...

Like jay-g said, if you think its worth it, then by all means you should go for it. It's a lot of work sometimes, and its difficult all of the time, but its very much worth it. It makes all the time you get to spend with that person that much more special.

Best of luck to you
 
Old 04-27-2004, 09:53 AM   #12 (permalink)
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i think it all depends on how dedicated you both are and how much commitment you have. it's important to get these things straightened out right away and know that you're (hopefully) on the same page. my boyfriend and i live 2 1/2 hours away, if you'd call that long distance. but we try to visit every weekend. it works because we're committed, we love eachother and we're passionate about it.
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Old 04-27-2004, 03:54 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Maybe I can offer some encouragement through my experience. Me and my girlfriend just celebrated our 7 yr anniversary together. Everything is going great and we have now been living together for just a little over a year. So according to the math, we did the long distance thing for over 5 years. Personally, I didn't think it was all that hard, but I'm sure my girlfriend would have to disagree. We started dating about a month before leaving for college, so we went into it with a brand new realationship. We were only able to see eachother on major holidays and such, but we had a strict routine of calling eachother every other day, writing and emailing. We both stayed very committed and neither of us cheated. People are always amazed at how well it worked for us, but like others here have stated, it totally depends on the couple and how much they value their relationship. If you think it's worth it, why not give it a try. Hope this helps.
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Old 04-28-2004, 05:58 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by im just a girl
i've heard both sides to the long distance argument of whether it works or not. i'm curious to know if anyone out there has had a successful long distance relationship, or why they didn't work out. i'm considering going into one myself, and i could use some reassurance that it might work

Never been in one, and in all honesty I don't see how a long-distance relationship can survive the test of time (especially if you hadn't been with that person for at least a few years before the spacial separation).
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Old 04-28-2004, 09:20 AM   #15 (permalink)
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doncalypso, you probably don't understand how it can survive the test of time because you've never done it. It works because you make it work. It's hard but it shows each other that you're loyal and faithful, and it really is a test of your love for that person.

Now personally, I've been in my relationship for nearly a year. Nine months of that will have been long distance. I get to see him every two weeks usually, and trust me, it gets tough. Lately yeah, I've been in nonstop fights with him. We get on each other's nerves because when we're away from each other we lose sight of who we love so much (and our personalities kind of change from lovey-dovey to no-nonsense schooltime). I've had my doubts this will work; so has he.

But in the end...we always end up still together and stronger because of all we've had to go through.

Last edited by la petite moi; 04-28-2004 at 09:22 AM..
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Old 04-29-2004, 05:47 AM   #16 (permalink)
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Lebell and I live over 1,000 miles apart. He moves here in two weeks after 10 months of long distance. It worked for us because we communicate constantly! It all depends on the level of commitment, desire, and communication with both parties. I figure, if you don't try, you won't know.
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Old 04-29-2004, 06:13 AM   #17 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by racer986s
So according to the math, we did the long distance thing for over 5 years.
This is extremely encouraging news that it was possible for such a long time. I'm currently in an overseas long distance relationship which looks like it will continue for another 2 years (total 2 and a half years). So far, for one reason or another, it's affordable for us two poor students to see each other every 3-6 months for the next year (and a half possibly), but the idea of being in a long distance relationship for soooo darn long is just sooo daunting!!

I hope everything works out well. I know that if it weren't for the distance, I'd have absolutely no doubts that it would just be a matter of time that we would move in and maybe even get engaged.
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