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-   -   is it just me? (https://thetfp.com/tfp/tilted-sexuality/49530-just-me.html)

fallenangel 03-18-2004 01:04 PM

is it just me?
 
this one's about female masturbation i guess. Ladies, to your gents have a problem with the fact that on occasion (if you do on occasion that is) you masturbate at all?

gents, does it bug you knowing that your gf does (if she does i guess)?

What i'm getting at is basically i'm irritated because even though i'm incredibly sexually active, on occasion i'd like to fly solo with my good ol b.o.b. and this has always struck a wrong note with my guy. I just didn't know if a lot of guys felt this way too, or if you ladies have experienced issues with your guys as well? Hmm, ridiculous i think.

Mr Jiggyfly 03-18-2004 01:16 PM

I would only be unhappy if I were wanting/expecting to participate and then she said no. But that would be more of a denial issue than an issue with her flying solo. If I'm working late (even though I work from home) or am for some reason unavailable... more power to her. I'll happily do anything I can to make her solo flight more enjoyable.

John Henry 03-18-2004 01:49 PM

Can't say I'd have a problem with it myself, unless it started getting in the way of our relationship. After all, it's not as if she's going to run away with her fingers.

I hope you'll excuse my ignorance, but wtf is a b. o. b.

Bobaphat 03-18-2004 01:52 PM

Hell, I wish she would more often.

Mr Jiggyfly 03-18-2004 01:55 PM

BOB = Battery Operated Boyfriend

Fenton-J-Cool 03-18-2004 01:58 PM

Shit, I'm all for it. Means she has an active sex drive. Better than her needing to fuck my best friend because I wouldn't let her get off at home.

SecretMethod70 03-18-2004 02:12 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Bobaphat
Hell, I wish she would more often.
:thumbsup: :D

Only way I would possibly ever be upset by onodrim masturbating is if I wanted to join in and she said no. And by no I mean no at all, not no not until later.

Nothing would be cooler than to be surprised by my s.o. masturbating when I didn't expect it ;)

FaderMonkey 03-18-2004 02:19 PM

I agree with what's been said so far. I could only see myself being upset if I got the feeling you were no longer interested in me. I've always wished that the girlfriends I've had in the past masturbated more, or at all.

Blackthorn 03-18-2004 02:48 PM

My former gf had several toys that she would use but the one that was her favorite was a little "egg" like thing. Took only one double A. I'll tell ya we never had more fun than when she was on with one of those toys. I'm all for it! :)

ickma 03-18-2004 03:55 PM

As long as your cock is bigger than her index finger then you shouldn't be worried about anything.

insidious_machinae 03-18-2004 04:31 PM

This message has been deleted.

Tomservo 03-18-2004 04:50 PM

I'm of the same opinion as most here- I encourage my wife to indulge herself in whatever kooky solo fantasies she has- but if she refused to let me join in, it would upset me. Granted, I wouldn't ask if it would spoil the moment, and I'd be just as likely to let her watch me, ya know, if it helps.

If she became too preoccupied with the solo act and it affected the quality/enjoyment of the together act, that would be problematic as well. (I think this is the problem with many guys masturbating- too into www.hotbabesinheat.com, they forget about the ACTUAL hot babe in heat in their bed.)

toiletraccoon 03-18-2004 04:52 PM

i wouldn't mind....especially if she'd let me watch

motdakasha 03-18-2004 04:59 PM

If you don't know what gets your going or how to, then how can he expect you to know what you want. Honestly, I feel that every human should be required to masturbate. http://www.masturbateforpeace.com/

redneckdude 03-18-2004 05:17 PM

Great link motdakasha.

Hey man we do so why shouldn't they get to. The other night when I came home from work at the bar, I logged on found my favorite p0rn site, then went to work on it. Well she woke up, which is really unusual for her at that hour, to go to the bathroom. When she came back to bed I was pretty self-absorbed at that time so she let her fingers do the walking. We both got off and went to sleep happy.

I find in enticing. I had a gf that after both of us had cum and were lying there relaxing, she would lightly stroke her clit. I found this an incredible turn on, and likewise she found it to be a big turn on to watch me stroke mine.

dude i'm cool with it
Scoty

zfleebin 03-18-2004 05:20 PM

I love it when my fiancee masturbates. She doesnt do it often but she tends to do it when I am out of town and makes me beg to hear about it after the fact. I think its wonderful and I would love to get her a sybian even if she wouldnt let me watch.

Amano 03-18-2004 05:22 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Fenton-J-Cool
Shit, I'm all for it. Means she has an active sex drive. Better than her needing to fuck my best friend because I wouldn't let her get off at home.

I think the fear against female masturbation is that it *lowers* the woman's sex drive, but I strongly believe it does quite the opposite. Or maybe it's a chicken and the egg thing, and the fact that she masturbates is indicative of her stronger sex drive.

Whichever way, I'm all for it. Like motdaksha said, it gives her familiarity with her body and what she wants, and assuming communication is there, it lets you know how to please her better

VF19 03-18-2004 09:07 PM

I am with SM70 here. As long as I can join in :)

fallenangel 03-19-2004 12:03 AM

so then there's no logical reason for him to have any sort of an issue with the chick masturbating, and by chick i mean myself... especially if my sex drive is already sky high, and i don't have a problem at all if he watches, and i go with OR without toy also... damnit all this confuses me...

thanks for the feedback though! greatly appreciated, makes me feel like i'm not blowing my thoughts out of proportion.

tisonlyi 03-19-2004 01:09 AM

In my experience, the more one has the more one wants.

She flicks the bean, she wants more attention for her bean - attention i am only too willing to supply.

:D

Doos 03-19-2004 02:26 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by ickma
As long as your cock is bigger than her index finger then you shouldn't be worried about anything.
:lol: :lol: :lol: Right on. You should be happy that she shares this info with you. More info = good.

qtpye4u84 03-19-2004 02:28 AM

well it would not bother me if my man wacked off
When hes at work i do it while watching porno while using my viberator. My man has not and does not wack off and to me that is strange we have been together for 3 years and still to this day i shower with him so he has no time to he could make time but he never does it im serious! I give him head but never a hand job unless im giving him head and using my hand.
And no he does not have another girl friend, but his sex drive went down cause he gets to lazy, he will get a hard on but he will be to lazy so i give him head or get him in the mood I have a very high sex drive i am talking 3 orgsm in one hour with masterbation and stll wanting my honey when he comes home we Use to do it like 6 times a day but now like 2 times or once in a day or head then sex

Doos 03-19-2004 02:49 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by qtpye4u84
well it would not bother me if my man wacked off
When hes at work i do it while watching porno while using my viberator. My man has not and does not wack off and to me that is strange we have been together for 3 years and still to this day i shower with him so he has no time to he could make time but he never does it im serious! I give him head but never a hand job unless im giving him head and using my hand.
And no he does not have another girl friend, but his sex drive went down cause he gets to lazy, he will get a hard on but he will be to lazy so i give him head or get him in the mood I have a very high sex drive i am talking 3 orgsm in one hour with masterbation and stll wanting my honey when he comes home we Use to do it like 6 times a day but now like 2 times or once in a day or head then sex

Conclusion: your man is lazy as hell. Imagine neglecting your cock like that.... And you are amazing. Do you have a sister in South Africa?

ratbastid 03-19-2004 09:11 AM

I've invested big bux in masturbatory toys for lurkette. It's fun using them together. It's fun knowing she uses them by herself. In short, it's all gooooood.

World's King 03-19-2004 11:07 AM

No.

I wish she would be touching herself all the time. I want her to have a random orgasm in the bar or at dinner one night... just all of a sudden her pants get really wet... and...


I'll be back.

bender 03-19-2004 11:16 AM

If you didn't have a S.O you would be doing it anyway so whats the big deal with the fact that you are when you have one.
Sometimes you just get there faster when you fly solo, so why not.

Charlatan 03-19-2004 11:49 AM

Put me in the column marked... "Doesn't Bother Me, in fact I encourage it"

Motdakasha put it best... "I feel that every human should be required to masturbate."

trwasmer 03-19-2004 09:08 PM

I wish my wife WOULD do it. Heck she is just not into self pleasure. I have told her it is a great release and very liberating.

Oh well

iccky 03-19-2004 11:23 PM

I think some partners view sexual activity as something special that should be shared exclusivly between them. So in a way he's jelous... of you, sort of you cheating on him with yourself.

My girlfriend used to sort of have a problem with me masturbating, she doesn't mind now so long as she's "involved in some way", either being told I'm doing it, or knowing i'm doing it while watching our home videos or at least thinking about her. It makes her happy.

2kids1headache 03-20-2004 09:05 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by iccky
I think some partners view sexual activity as something special that should be shared exclusivly between them. So in a way he's jelous... of you, sort of you cheating on him with yourself.
That's it exactly. Think about it and ask yourself what other things he gets jealous about.

I hate sounding fatalistic, but the jealousy problem only gets worse as time goes by. Every time you assert the part of yourself that makes him jealous, the jealousy gets just a little bigger for your nonconformity. Think, seriously, about finding someone who isn't jealous when you play with yourself.

doncalypso 03-20-2004 12:24 PM

I'm all for female masturbation.... The only way a woman can teach a man how to please her is if she know what pleases herself through masturbation.

Hell... if there's one thing I'd love more than anything is if my girlfriend would play with her clitoris while we're having sex (but she refuses because she claims she's not comfortable masturbating in front of me or while she's on top).

Actually, I bought her two vibrators for Christimas: a small white one with multiple detacheable heads, and a 7-inch glow-in-the-dark vibrating dildo. She uses them once in a while, and I do not feel threatened by that in any way.

Eugeni 03-20-2004 12:28 PM

I agree with Iccky. Do you have lower sex drive than him?

Maybe he can feel that you sometimes refuse him when he's in the mood and so he thinks that playing solo is mean of you. It is only a possible hypothesis.

diddagirl 03-20-2004 01:11 PM

Well I am in a long term relationship.... so my b/f doesnt mind if I masturbate while we are having phone sex. But I know he does seem a bit bothered if I were to use a vibrator. I think maybe he gets a bit jealous... and doesnt want me to enjoyt the vibrator more then him (which would never happen)!

guthmund 03-20-2004 08:52 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ickma
As long as your cock is bigger than her index finger then you shouldn't be worried about anything.
You mean like the whole finger? :(

Quote:

Originally posted by toiletraccoon
i wouldn't mind....especially if she'd let me watch
EXACTLY! I like it when a woman takes a hands on approach. Especially when I'm in the same room. :)

blindawg 03-21-2004 02:31 PM

If I can do it, why can't she. Hell I love it when she IM's me at work to tell me she just got off.. More power to her..

Bleed Me Dry 03-21-2004 05:27 PM

As far as I know...most men would appreciate it if you masterbated, as long as they get to watch. And if you're doing it at home he never has to know and never has to get mad.

Apache 03-23-2004 12:35 PM

My husband loves to watch me masturbate and he certainly doesn't care that i do it while he's at work. In fact when i tell him that I did it he just gets turned on. It's not like by masturbating I'm not going to want him anymore so why should it bother him? It's not like i have ever turned him down.
For me the feeling of an orgasm I have from masturbating with a vibrator is different from the one I have from sex. I like the feeling of the orgasm I have from sex a whole lot more, it feels a lot better (hope that made sense) but I agree sometimes its just fun to do it solo.

wubbawubba 03-23-2004 12:53 PM

As long as I'm getting some it's cool. I mean I masterbate daily and I know that I'm not doing it cuz I'm not satisfied with my girl.
However if she is turning me down, and still masterbating, I would be upset.

Cherry 03-24-2004 01:43 AM

I'm all about the self pleasure, baby. As long as we're both getting what we need, it's all good. :thumbsup:

alpha 03-24-2004 09:10 AM

I'd only like it if my gf masturbated so she wouldn't learn more about herself and what turns her on.. she's tried it only a few times I think. So no, it wouldn't bother me at all.. after all, I mastubate quite often myself and she doesn't seem to mind.


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