Am I being overly cautious?
 

Ok, this is probably kind of a silly question, but bear with me.

I met this girl, she is pretty nice. But I don't know how I feel about her. I'm not 100% sure that, in 20 years, I want to wake up with her. This might change, I just don't know her well enough yet. Right now we have decided it is just kind of a fling till I leave the state. With these two things in mind, I have decided I don't want to have sex with her (yet at any rate). I'm willing to do everything else she wants, and I think she is enjoying it. But I have a hard time letting her bring me to orgasm, simply because the end result ends up all over myself and a little bit over her. Now I know its silly, but I'm just a little worried about my chances of getting her pregnant this way.

I know the chances are pretty low, but I guess I need to hear it from you guys. I want to be in a relationship with this girl (even if the future looks shaky). I want her to enjoy herself. But I don't want a family right yet.

If you're not having intercourse, where does the pregnancy concern come in ? You don't want to cum on her ?

I think you are being overly cautious, which at times isn't bad, but geez, have fun. I mean, it's just sounding like you really don't have anything to worry about, and you're creating unnecessary stress for yourself.

It is possible to have children without having intercourse. A "virgin" can become pregnant, even without a miracle.

It is also possible that a meteor will hit you on your head in 30 seconds.

Are you standing on a meteor landing pad? "the white zone is for chodrite meteors only. No tektites in the white zone."

Are you ejaculating all over, or in the region of, her vagina?

she's a heifer, isn't she?
then just do her belly button, now thats safe sex

Harshaw,

I remember what you went through with your last girlfriend, so I know you want to be cautious. The advice above is good. I would just add that it takes more time than just a short bit to be sure about someone. I almost didn't ask my wife out on a second date as she was a virgin and frankly had quite a few dating insecurities that I wasn't sure I wanted to deal with. It took us several dates before we really saw we were just alike.

If the concern is physical, get out now. And by this I mean.. if you think you can "do better" than her physically, then that thought WILL stick with you until the times get tough, and then you'll dump her anyhow.

I am NOT advocating dumping someone for being "unattractive", however. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. BUT... if you don't find her attractive, that may change, but it won't change so radically that you'll never consider her unattractive again. I've fought this demon several times, justifying myself while being with a girl I wasn't particularly physically attracted to, and it's just too difficult to maintain every time you get close to someone you DO find physically attractive. You think "why couldn't she..." or "If only I..." and those thoughts do NOT belong in a relationship.

(This advice covers both sexes, btw. I'm an equal opportunity pig)

That said, if it doesn't involve physicality, you should just apply this same advice to whatever area you're concerned about. If she seems too "dumb", she probably always will. If she seems too "wierd", well, she might always.

Occassionally humans forget it's OKAY to be picky and only have sexual relationships with those we actually ARE crazy about.

Oh, wait.. you were concerned about pregnancy. If that's the case, it's simple... ask her if she'll swallow. Case closed!

I dont think so, she could get pregnant if you are messing around, but like the other guy said, a lot of it would depend on exactly how you are "getting it all over" - I mean, you could just let her give ive you head? Or wear a condom?

I think you are erring too much on the side of caution.
Few suggestions:
Wear a condom
Ask her to swallow
Have her use a contraceptive
Take a bath together in spermicidal lubricant.

swallowing isnt totally safe.... if watermelons can grow in your stomach from swallowing the seeds then babies can grow from swallowed sperm....

a girl i know once said that she would never have anal sex cause she wouldnt want to get pregnant and have an anal baby.

:lol: Imagine that! Wait, don't!

Medically, you don't have to worry about getting her pregnany, unless you are blowing loads around her vaginal region. Sperm can't travel from the mouth to the ovaries...

I'd say just take it slow if you when you get back you realize you want to be with her make that committment and then see where it goes, but that's just my opinion

Its not a physical thing. I think she is good looking. It is more of a "I don't feel like dating because I just got dumped" sort of thing. But she wouldn't listen.

Thanks for all the replies. I feel better.

This gives new definition to "Dropping the kids off at the pool":lol:

There is no way to get pregnant if you are ONLY doing oral. It's lots of fun too!

some of the replies in this thread have made me laugh harder than anything else ever on this board... "she's a heifer" OMG that's funny.... I laughed so much that my wife came over, read the reply and hit ME.. Damn.

Yep. For this one, we're going to have to go all the way back to the civil war.

It seems that at the Battle of Antietam, a bullet pierced the testicle of a Union soldier, and embedded itself in the ovary of an 18-year-old girl who was 100 feet from him at the time.

Well, the baby was fine, she was very happy. Guilt-free. Of course, the soldier was a little pissed off.

If you think about it, it's actually a form of intercourse. But... not for everyone. Those who love action, maybe.

(with thanks to Tom Waits!)

the magic sperm theory, after ejaculating in her mouth, cum dribbles out of her mouth, lands on breast, he rubs her breast, gets sperm on finger, and then places it in her vagina when he starts to finger bang her. boom she's pregnant.

back, and to the left, back, and to the left

Enjoy today. That's all that matters. Don't look upon the future, it will only weigh you down and may confuse you.
And don't worry about now either. And, if you do fear pregnancy, stop it! Seriously, you can be aware and protect yourselves or live in fear. It's your choice. Don't let all of that petty fear weigh you down.

You can never be too careful.

Use an unlubricated condom.

It's not safe to risk getting ejaculate smeared anywhere near her vagina. That includes drops, splashes, if it's on someone's hand and it touches near there, etc. Then there's also the whole health/safety issue... if that's a concern of yours.