Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community (https://thetfp.com/tfp/)
-   Tilted Sexuality (https://thetfp.com/tfp/tilted-sexuality/)
-   -   How do you masturbate? (https://thetfp.com/tfp/tilted-sexuality/45469-how-do-you-masturbate.html)

forecheck 02-22-2004 10:48 PM

Over the webcam while the girl who is watching tells me how she wants me to grab the back of her head and whip the precum on her lips so they are all shiny. Then stick it into her mouth and push it...

In the next week or so I will go over to her house and watch her while she reciprocates...

iceburn 02-22-2004 11:00 PM

I thought someone was asking because they didn't know how to do it... I was like "how the fuck do you need to ask that shit...." um yea. I'm still confused about why that guy needed to jizz into a cup "so his mom wouldn't find out". That actually is nonsense. How is jacking off into a cup MORE discreet than into a kleenex or paper towel. What's going on here?

And also I'm freaked by anyone sticking anything near my ass. It's got to do with being tickle-tortured as a child, I naturally freak when my gf's hands touch anything below the balls (Not that my parents tickle-tortured my balls...whatever) . My body convulses violently. It's embarrassing.

fatboss 02-23-2004 07:55 AM

As fast as possible so nobody walks into our bedroom and catches me!!!!

I find a copy of Men Only or Club International helps. :)

Years ago I had to rely on raiding my younger Brothers stash of mags because I didn't have the guts to go and buy them. These days I don't give a shit!

Oh, and into anything I can find in the dirty laundry basket is good to deposit my goods!

LordEden 02-24-2004 11:07 PM

Porn... lots of porn. I spend to much time finding new porn it's not even funny. Oh and I use my hand and toliet paper.
I've had friends who have done it in the dorm showers, but I couldn't bring myself to do it, I'll just jack off in my own room, fuck the roommate. Not really, but I wouldn't care if he was there.

runawayfetus 02-25-2004 04:48 PM

yea... pretty much exact same thing goes for me ^^

beejay 02-26-2004 02:48 PM

Quite often in the shower (ala American Beauty), but also frequently at the computer (I have also learned to keep the mouse in the right hand and take care of business with the left!)

Also like to have mutual masturbation sessions with the wife. She REALLY gets turned on watching me. We never make it to solo happy endings as she always jumps on top of me and rides me until I scream (& cream)!

emphant 02-26-2004 09:11 PM

Anyone ever just go on their hand, then just take off their sock and wipe it there?

No one? Uhh....me neither then.

Oh, and how do those artificial vaginas works? Or what about blowup dolls? Always been curious, never found out.

jazzwyld 02-26-2004 10:41 PM

Baby Oil or Hand Lotion, in my inverted right hand. I just put a towel down

mr.montreal 02-26-2004 11:27 PM

i pin my penis between my legs, like if im trying to tuck away my penis (guys would know what i mean)....i apply some lube to my inner thighs, and lay in the fetul position, while i move my legs toward and against me very quickly.

ARTelevision 02-27-2004 06:31 AM

I always mastubate with the girls and never, ever, do it alone.
That would be no fun at all.

Jim Kata 02-27-2004 12:34 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by mr.montreal
i pin my penis between my legs, like if im trying to tuck away my penis (guys would know what i mean)....i apply some lube to my inner thighs, and lay in the fetul position, while i move my legs toward and against me very quickly.
You, my friend, are a genius! HAHAHAHAHAHHA

HYEHORSE 02-27-2004 01:36 PM

as little as possible. but sometimes, a man's got to do what a man's got to do.

runawayfetus 02-29-2004 02:58 PM

interesting technique... hah id feel very awkward trying it

RoboBlaster 02-29-2004 05:31 PM

It would be absolutely ego crushing to be caught spazzing naked in the fetal position.

cait987 03-02-2004 03:23 PM

May sound crazy, but just now I did it with a banana, not sure where I got the idea but I have a broken wrist and was desperate so I go upstairs looking for something and see a banana, ate some of it and then cut some out, taped it a few times heated for 15 seconds and well ... best mastrabation ever, well acctaully its the best because it was the most odd, hands get old after a while!

ritzboi 03-02-2004 05:43 PM

Towel, toilet, shower.. wherever I can aim..

Evil Milkman 03-02-2004 06:15 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by RoboBlaster
It would be absolutely ego crushing to be caught spazzing naked in the fetal position.
:lol:

God... I can't even begin to imagine! :crazy: I wouldn't be able to look whoever caught me in the eye again!

Shady 03-02-2004 06:20 PM

i gave up masturbation for Lent...

i hope i don't die. :(

runawayfetus 03-02-2004 09:33 PM

i hate bananas.. i barf when i eat them... if i put one on my penis id cry and never go into the public again

water_boy1999 03-04-2004 11:19 AM

Anyone ever tried a cantaloupe or honeydew melon......Holy shit it feels like the real thing, and cheaper in some cases. Ok, that's only on special occasions.

Regularly just pop in some hardcore porn, two times a day usually. DVD is the best because you can get right to the good stuff without the ridiculous dialogue.

Slacks_01 03-04-2004 11:50 AM

i use a napkin, one hand, and lots of imagination

mastboyx 03-06-2004 12:20 PM

with my haand :D

Skettios 03-06-2004 07:10 PM

With my hand. I like to alternate days, I can hardly ever wait more than three or four days, or I walk around permanently erect.

Mantus 03-06-2004 09:19 PM

Warm up with the left, finish with the right, thank you.

Cant stand the shower, my cum turns very sticky the moment water touches it, then for some reason cum+water+soap make my head really really sensitive which causes further problem...so no shower for me.

dfence 03-06-2004 10:06 PM

furiously

santafe5000 03-07-2004 08:55 PM

BANANA MAN
Simply peel a banana (you can eat it later), slip the peel over your penis, and masturbate with it. The banana slime is a great lubricant. You can warm up the peel in the microwave for added sensations. Also, you might have better results if you peel the banana by making just one cut in the peel and removing the fruit through the single cut; you can then cut off the end of the banana peel and insert your penis through that end.


Now, I haven't tried this myself, But it does sound interesting.
Myself, i just use the ol HAND METHOD into a wad of Kleenex.

zfleebin 03-07-2004 11:26 PM

with zest and determination

paulskinback 05-25-2005 07:07 AM

Do You Masturbate in the Shower?
 
You know, you're all soaped up and slippery and wet, you got to clean it properly haven't you?

Question is, how many of you wank in the shower?



I do... but not every time

Axiom_e 05-25-2005 08:39 AM

Well, I masturbate once a night. It helps me go to sleep. I rather masturbate in my room then in the shower. I don't come as hard in the shower the orgasms are much more intense when I am in my bed. The orgasms I have been haveing recently are much more intense then any I have had. That or either I forgot what it is like to be with a girl. But hey if I forget then there isn't as much desire to get a female.

This is critical. Buy lube and use it to masterbate. Soap dries you and even with lotion you can still chafe yourself. Chafing sucks. Buy lube it is the greatest stuff in existence. Buy lube! Trust me it will change your sex life even if you are getting it regularly.

boredom 05-25-2005 08:44 AM

Using right or left hand (raising dexterity!)

some hotel tissue

black94lt1 05-25-2005 09:09 AM

Into the bathroom sink while "reading" one of the finer publications in my possession!

ruggerp11 05-25-2005 04:59 PM

"by myself"

Had too

I read somewhere once someone who said

"I jerk off in the shower so much that every time it rains I get a hard on"

Totally me

oberon 05-25-2005 11:05 PM

Cue the "Every Sperm Is Sacred" song...

Suave 05-25-2005 11:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by alec
crying while listening to the cure, and its valentines day

Hahaha. That's fantublous.

mandy 05-26-2005 01:45 AM

well, this is really strange.because i've reading through all of these two pages and not once did i see a GIRL comenting or giving her take on masturbation or how she does it.

ok, so its very hard for us to squirt but its still as much fun and sometimes we end up having some of our most powerful orgasms when we do it alone.

it was much fun reading how all you guys do it but none of you talk about "doing it" with a partner which is ten times more fun than doing it alone.to listen to the breathing of the other person(in that i'm talking about 2partners, not some random person, that would just be wierd and totally disgusting).and just listening to them pleasure themselves is enough to send you straight over the edge.

and in saying that, firstly i never used to masturbate until i met my bf(about two years ago)now...i cant imagine that i never used to do it before because its absolutely amazing.and doing it with him there makes it soooooooooooooo much better.

secondly, when he and i maturbate together, i like it when he just cums, nothing there(as in no toilet paper, no tissues)and i just use my hand to "catch it".then i'll go and get a nice warm face cloth to clean us both up.

Cedak 05-26-2005 08:05 PM

Sometimes while watching porn, sometimes lying down. Lying down is the easiest for me to come, followed by sitting, standing up can be very difficult at times, but the orgasm is often VERY intense. Sometimes actually better-intense, sometimes just different-intense. Sometimes in the shower, standing up of course, it can take me like a half hour...it's annoying, because the water gets cold, and my arms get tired. Oh yeah, I used to always use righty, I learned to use lefty, although he usually can't go as fast.

And as far as dorms go...well, I have done it there, usually late at night. But keep in mind it washes down easily and the bathrooms are scrubbed daily.

Oh, creepy dorm story though. Two showers per bathroom, two bathrooms per gender per floor. The dividers between the showers have gaps at the bottom about a foot tall...one time this guy was like, leaned up against the adjoining wall, so I could see his feet even in my periphreal vision. His feet never moved the entire time he was in the shower. If that wasn't enough, the way the lights above were positioned projected a faint shadow onto my side. Gee, what's that rectangular object rhymically moving back and forth? You could SO tell he was jerkin'. Man, not with another dude showering next to you!

slushi999 05-30-2005 04:33 PM

used to do squirt in a toilet paper, but after i clean up around the tip with the tissue paper, i notice that some of the tissue paper stays on underneath the tip of my penis after a few days when folding the skin back, why is this, when after cleanup - i dont see anything? and is this unhealthy - like i forget to check? maybe i should start using a towel - but really wanna keep things clean and easy to deal with

drewpy 06-04-2005 03:41 AM

with dermalogic shaving oil, during the daily shower shave sac attak ... its actually a moisturizing program - my skin so supple afterwards :)

M0oMo0Man 06-12-2005 02:09 PM

You take a cold shower...

Luckless 06-12-2005 02:20 PM

with good ol' lefty


All times are GMT -8. The time now is 06:30 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2025, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
© 2002-2012 Tilted Forum Project


1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311 312 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 320 321 322 323 324 325 326 327 328 329 330 331 332 333 334 335 336 337 338 339 340 341 342 343 344 345 346 347 348 349 350 351 352 353 354 355 356 357 358 359 360