help. cant finish off when recieving oral
 

esentially, the title says it all....

ok, basic outline of the situation...been with my girl around 2 and a bit weeks now, she gives, without doubt, the best oral i have ever recieved in my life. despite this, no matter how long she spends, i cant finish off.
ive never had this problem with girls ive been with previously, whose oral skills pale in comparison to my current girlfriend.
i feel really guilty, coz she puts in a lot of effort, and i can tell she gets frustrated when i simply wont finish, no matter how long she goes for...

performance anxiety? maybe.....
any advice?

Good question... I don't know, put some music on and try not to worry about it. If it happens, then it happens, if not, then oh well...

If you are truly comfortable and caring towards each other, then you'll both know that being together isn't about whether you have an orgasm or not. It's bound to happen eventually...

what works for me is thinking about sex with the girl if she's giving me head, this way it helps cause she is right there, and you don't feel guilty cause you are honestly thinking about her.

sometimes i cant seem to quite get all the way there... but if i think about the details... her lips around it the motion etc... and about what a hottie is doing it... usually that will be enough to send me over the edge on those days...

think: bucket of water / shotgun.

You could also try holding your breath. Not for extremely long times of course, you dont want to pass out =P. But for 10-15 seconds at a time rather than rapid breating. Sometimes that can help speed things up.

haha, i have found that if you want to pass out from an orgasm, try to hyperventilate with LONG deep, rapid breaths about 20 seconds before you cum. It seriously pushes me over the edge and afterwards, i am so drained, it feels like she sucked my toes out through..there

But i've often had the problem of not finishing from oral. I find it amazing and i've never had a bad bj, but it takes me forever...and worse, it takes me longer when she's awesome bc i don't want it to end, so i find i'm clenching the PC muscle more and it's just not letting anything through and if i loosen it much, then everything feels WAAAAYYYY too sensitive and i want to crawl out of my skin...


mmm, what a day

I have the same problem, except i have never had a girl get me off so i think there are at least some other people who have problems like this. maybe

Same issue here. Only the girls who suck like hoovers could get me off. The vast majority could not. I still have the same problem with intercourse on occasion. It feels so good that I don't want it to stop, so I mentally slow it down and then I can't orgasm.

Yeah, especially when i'm used to getting it regularly and it's really good.

used to drive my ex nuts bc she seemed to base her own performance off my orgasm, which didn't always occur...
SSOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...
we'd go at it for hours, she'd try oral, i would be too sensitive to touch by then, and we'd start over...

sooo much fun

I don't know about your particular situation, but it helps if there's other interaction going on while she's giving head. I know it helps me to also focus in on what's going on and for her to play with the balls or touch me somewhere else. The more she touches or plays with, the better and more aroused I get. So you might want to suggest she get more into it like that...?

Never came from a blowjob in my life.

Been deep throated, hoovered, licked, sucked, nibbled, chewed, munched, brunched and lightly drizzled in maple syrup.

Nowt works.

Not that I dont love receiving, like. In fact, i think the non-cumming thing is a bit of an advantage... It means i get my cock sucked for longer, and get to finish off inside her after a longer period of, err, stimulation (better orgasms IMHO).

Hay ho.

ok..im thinking of it
mind is still blank

A buttplug mate! Seriously!

Can't say as I've ever had this problem

Or her finger in your bottom, either way.

quote from Road Trip:

"Did I say two fingers? I meant three!" :crazy: :crazy: :lol: :crazy: :lol:

This took me a second but then the light bulb came on. Good advice!

speaking from a woman's point of view....(and I'm not bragging I promise I'm not) Fellatio is what I was born to do, its an art to me (yeah yeah, Iknow.... the guy doesnt care he just wants his dick sucked lol) I honestly have never had a guy, no matter how much he tried to say he couldnt, NOT get off. The trick...and a lot of women dont really realize this...is that you cant do all guys the same way...just like a guy cannot go down on every woman in existance the same way and get them off, because women all like it differently.

With guys like you (and I'm not trying to imply at all that your girl isnt good) the girl needs to take the time and find out the combination of things that work on the guy she's with...some guys get off just from the sucking, some guys from sucking and finger insertion, other guys from stroking while sucking, and the stroking varies too....all guys like the grip differently in varying degrees.

Communication is the key, if your girl is doing something that you KNOW is not going to get you anywhere then you need to let her know that so that she doesnt wear herself out and so that she can try something different.

BINGO! We have a winner here folks.

Up to this point, i've never come from a woman sucking me off.
However, i have when a guy has. Yeah, i know familiarity with the equipment (has any gay guy, lesbian or bi person will tell you)
Of course, i would concider a queer girl telling me that i 'eat pussy like a dyke' to be a high compliment :)

Maybe you've tried this already, but try working your way up to the 100%-from-her oral-gasm. Given that it's early in the "relationship", maybe the communication part hasn't taken hold yet, so you can't really tell her how you'd really love to "get over the hill" from the bj, and have her rise to the challenge...

...so when you're getting really close, just casually pull out and finish yourself off (you can do that, right?)...maybe she likes it somewhere special? Do that a few times, then move to having her finish you off with wet hands, and eventually you'll get to the point where you can do it just by thinking of your/her hands while no hands are being used.

...my 2¢

edit: Oh! I nearly forgot to say "congratulations, now stop complaining that your gf gives wicked head" ;)

hehe...im not complaining about that, believe me.
i am complaining that in 3 days, she's moving 1000km away for university though :( (see my post in the long distance relationships thread)

try some flavor lube might help

I have had that problem before. One thing I found that helps to get off is if you do some stroking while she is sucking on the head. It gets both of you involved, you get off and shes not disappointed.

i used to have the same problem, then i started getting it less often and that problem went away because it became a little more special i guess

Try this: stop receiving any kind of penile stimulation for a few weeks. No sex, no hand/blow-jobs, no masturbating, nothing. Naturally, it's perfectly okay to get her off in the meantime. But after a few weeks of denial, try it again, and watch what happens after all of fifteen seconds.

Of course, if you get blueballs (I don't, thank God), you might not want to do this.

oh god, if i went more than 4 days w/out some form of release, you'd be seeing headlines like:

"Beautiful lady drowns in unfortunate sex act"

seriously, if you're accustomed to getting something daily or more than once a day and you just cut it out cold turkey for more than a week, ther is going to be some major sprayage going on..

not to mention, it will take a few more times before you get the feeling back to normal...


but you'll come from oral...maybe from just putting on clothes...

I really couldn't imagine a month or more..


Ooo, even better is to have her tease you for a week or so, like giving a bit, stopping or having sex but not letting you finish. after a week of that...yeah