Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community  

Go Back   Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community > The Academy > Tilted Sexuality


 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 01-02-2004, 08:31 PM   #1 (permalink)
The Original JizzSmacka
 
Jesus Pimp's Avatar
 
How long do you keep mementos of your ex?

I put all my mementos of my ex i.e letters, pictures, movie tickets, postcards, etc.. in a big sealed envelope. I've been wondering how long I should keep it. How long do you keep mementos of your ex? Also I have every email that she has ever written to me stored in an outlook folder. Should I bother keeping that? I'm using Outlook 2003 so it would be a pain to back up. What do you guys think?
__________________
Never date anyone who doesn't make your dick hard.
Jesus Pimp is offline  
Old 01-02-2004, 08:41 PM   #2 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: North of the Border
I keep one or two things from ex's. The reason I do this is so that I remember the good times AND the bad so that I can hopefully do better in the next relationship.

I throw away the rest of the crap...
__________________
Sometimes, you gotta say no to a stripper....
rufgti is offline  
Old 01-02-2004, 08:56 PM   #3 (permalink)
The Original JizzSmacka
 
Jesus Pimp's Avatar
 
So is sending her the shit I don't want, a bad idea?
__________________
Never date anyone who doesn't make your dick hard.
Jesus Pimp is offline  
Old 01-02-2004, 08:59 PM   #4 (permalink)
Junkie
 
cchris's Avatar
 
Location: Sydney
I keep the flammables for special occasions but the rest gets tossed.
__________________
There's a fine line between participation and mockery
cchris is offline  
Old 01-02-2004, 09:17 PM   #5 (permalink)
Junk
 
Any mementos are out the same day as she is. No later.
__________________
" In Canada, you can tell the most blatant lie in a calm voice, and people will believe you over someone who's a little passionate about the truth." David Warren, Western Standard.
OFKU0 is offline  
Old 01-02-2004, 09:20 PM   #6 (permalink)
Is In Love
 
Averett's Avatar
 
Location: I'm workin' on it
When my ex broke up with me I threw everything out. Every gift he gave me, the one card he gave to me. I loved that card too. I thought it was so romantic and sweet. He gave it to me for Christmas. I realized later how fake it was. Cause he was cheatin on me with a 17 year old girl. Anyway, I tossed it all.
__________________
Absence is to love what wind is to fire. It extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.
Averett is offline  
Old 01-02-2004, 09:43 PM   #7 (permalink)
Is mad at you.
 
Location: Bored in Sacramento
Quote:
Originally posted by Averett
I loved that card too. I thought it was so romantic and sweet. He gave it to me for Christmas.
It would be nice to date someone who got attached to the sweet things like that. My girlfriend could care less what I gave to her.

I gave most of her stuff back when she came out to visit for Christmas. We haven't quite broken up, but if I had to put a term to the relationship, it would have to be 'coma'. I still have some of her books, but I can't bring myself to throw out books... they will be assimilated.
__________________
This too shall pass.
Harshaw is offline  
Old 01-02-2004, 10:00 PM   #8 (permalink)
Newlywed
 
sillygirl's Avatar
 
Location: at home
Quote:
Originally posted by cchris
I keep the flammables for special occasions but the rest gets tossed.
Yup. Flammable is fun, isn't it? I usually burn everything flammable from my ex's. But my last ex took everything, so there isn't much left... asshole....

Anyway, I wouldn't mail it all back to her. Burn it. Fire is fun, and building a big one is sure a stress reliever!
__________________

Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly-Rose Franken
....absence makes me miss him more...
sillygirl is offline  
Old 01-02-2004, 10:12 PM   #9 (permalink)
Natalie Portman is sexy.
 
omega2K4's Avatar
 
Location: The Outer Rim
Quote:
Originally posted by Averett
When my ex broke up with me I threw everything out. Every gift he gave me, the one card he gave to me. I loved that card too. I thought it was so romantic and sweet. He gave it to me for Christmas. I realized later how fake it was. Cause he was cheatin on me with a 17 year old girl. Anyway, I tossed it all.

Aw poor Averett, that guy is a dick.

Anyways, I still keep in touch with a few of my exs, we were always really good friends. There is 1 of my exs I try to avoid like the plague, she's a fucking lunatic.
__________________
"While the State exists there can be no freedom. When there is freedom there will be no State." - Vladimir Ilyich Lenin

"Reason has always existed, but not always in a reasonable form."- Karl Marx
omega2K4 is offline  
Old 01-02-2004, 10:51 PM   #10 (permalink)
Junkie
 
Seaver's Avatar
 
Location: Fort Worth, TX
I never threw anything away. Just put into a box in the back of the closet.

For me though its kinda different, I've stayed friends with every single ex of mine, even with those that cheated on me or treated me like shit.

I guess I'm different because no matter what they put me through I always see why I origionally liked them, so even though I'd never go back to dating them, I've always remained friends. So the objects are kinda like old HS photos, you pull them out once a year or so, think back, smile, and get on with your life.

If you think destroying things will help you... go for it. Many of my friends never got over the girl until they threw out/destroyed everything their ex left, only you know whats best for you.
Seaver is offline  
Old 01-02-2004, 10:54 PM   #11 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: Sydney, Australia
I printed every e-mail out, and her letters and stuck em into a folder, I'm prolly never gotta open it, but if I ever just wanna read about it, then I can !! (email was a pretty big way of communication, even though we saw each other about 3-4 times a week).

I can see where keeping the stuff can be, bad.. but where it can be good too I spose.. I guess in the early stages up break up you don't wanna be reminded.... but I guess once you've moved on and stuff it'd be okay..
Zorvox is offline  
Old 01-03-2004, 12:54 AM   #12 (permalink)
Insane
 
I keep the best. I'll remember what happened, but I prefer to have reminders (tucked safely in the back of the closet, rarely seeing the light of day) of the good times.
__________________

17 seconds is all you really need
- Smashing Pumpkins
SparklingDot is offline  
Old 01-03-2004, 01:15 AM   #13 (permalink)
Upright
 
The general rule is

If they pissed you off or screwed you over you sell anaything of value and burn the rest. If it was a mutual split return their stuff and keep a few of the naked pics for your own personal thrills hehehehehe..............
Enzomat is offline  
Old 01-03-2004, 02:26 AM   #14 (permalink)
Insane
 
I've kept momentos of all of them. Hell, I still have stuff from the girl I fooled around with when I was in the sixth grade. Most of it is boxed up, but I've no inclination to get rid of any of it. Is this bad?

How many people would be bothered if the S.O. kept momentos of their exs? I could imagine some people being bothered by the panty collection or the old love letters, but I wonder for how many it would be an issue.
phaedrus is offline  
Old 01-03-2004, 02:47 AM   #15 (permalink)
Banned
 
Quote:
Originally posted by cchris
I keep the flammables for special occasions but the rest gets tossed.
Stole my answer... except EVERYTHING is flammable when you're me.

I like using this old army ammo box... dump some gas in there over top anything, drop in match, watch happily.
analog is offline  
Old 01-03-2004, 04:52 AM   #16 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: Ottawa...the greatest city in Canada...down the road from silentjay!
Try to think of it logically...keep all of the cool stuff,like watches,cd,dvd playersand whatever....the rest just throw out,you don't need love letters and movie tickets.

Sometimes its better to act like a stupid guy and try to be less emotional about these things.
__________________
i may or may not be on acid right now....
rideough is offline  
Old 01-03-2004, 06:24 AM   #17 (permalink)
Nothing
 
tisonlyi's Avatar
 
Forever.

Why would I throw them out?

The pain is more than cancelled out by the good memories.

But then, i'm a freak.
__________________
"I do not agree that the dog in a manger has the final right to the manger even though he may have lain there for a very long time. I do not admit that right. I do not admit for instance, that a great wrong has been done to the Red Indians of America or the black people of Australia. I do not admit that a wrong has been done to these people by the fact that a stronger race, a higher-grade race, a more worldly wise race to put it that way, has come in and taken their place." - Winston Churchill, 1937 --{ORLY?}--
tisonlyi is offline  
Old 01-03-2004, 06:26 AM   #18 (permalink)
Nothing
 
tisonlyi's Avatar
 
Quote:
Try to think of it logically...keep all of the cool stuff,like watches,cd,dvd playersand whatever
EXACTLY.

People will throw non-valuable memntos straight away.

I doubt they'll throw the ford out with the gift tags.

(though maybe they should, evil Fords.)
__________________
"I do not agree that the dog in a manger has the final right to the manger even though he may have lain there for a very long time. I do not admit that right. I do not admit for instance, that a great wrong has been done to the Red Indians of America or the black people of Australia. I do not admit that a wrong has been done to these people by the fact that a stronger race, a higher-grade race, a more worldly wise race to put it that way, has come in and taken their place." - Winston Churchill, 1937 --{ORLY?}--
tisonlyi is offline  
Old 01-03-2004, 07:12 AM   #19 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: At the Casino
I have way more good and great happy memories of the x than bad ones. I have kept everything. I don't pull it out every day or every month, but I am not going to trash the last 7 years of my life. Althogh I totaly agree with keeping the nudie pics. My x was once in a photography class in college. She took some realy awesome nudes of her self using a timer and tripod. They she developed the pics her self and used some really awesome developing methods on them to get some cool effects. I really like them a lot and some times when I feel down I pul them out and remember that some one did care about me. Then I wank it.

Once I was talking to the x and she asked if I would ever send out her pics or use them for black mail. I told her I never would, and I ment it. To me they are my pics and only my pics. Even if I never am with her again they are something that her current BF or future BF will never have.

Wow, that was a little longer than it started out to be.
__________________
Did I mention that I can't spell or type?
Oh yeah, check out my car
www.cardomain.com/member_pages/view_page.pl?page_id=275916
tfin is offline  
Old 01-03-2004, 08:32 AM   #20 (permalink)
Fast'n'Bulbous
 
Location: Australia, Perth
i still have a lot of thingas girls have given me in the apst. It's probably a little sad, but i like stuff liek that
although i avenv't had any kind of long term relationship with all the pain of breaking up and stfuf anyway
Sleepyjack is offline  
Old 01-03-2004, 08:52 AM   #21 (permalink)
Addict
 
Location: watching from the treeline
I tossed all of my stuff into the garbage can.

It sucked when we got back together and I had to explain myself though.
timalkin is offline  
Old 01-03-2004, 09:17 AM   #22 (permalink)
Observant Ruminant
 
Location: Rich Wannabe Hippie Town
If it doesn't mean anything to you, trash it. If it still does, keep it -- if you don't mind your future wife wondering about it, and if you don't mind your kids finding it and giggling over it in 20 years.

On the other hand, 20 years from now, might not be bad to have the stuff to look at for a little perspective. Like, if you have kids and they're in their late teens and having goofy relationships that worry you, you can revisit your old relationship at that age and see how much difference there is between you at that age, and them. It's just an envelope, easy to store.

As for sending her stuff back to her, I wouldn't; I've had it done to me, and the message I get from it is "Here, I'm cleaning you out of my life." Well, I didn't really need an announcement, thanks; if you don't want it, trash it silently and move on.

Last edited by Rodney; 01-03-2004 at 09:22 AM..
Rodney is offline  
Old 01-03-2004, 09:42 AM   #23 (permalink)
Junkie
 
james t kirk's Avatar
 
Location: Toronto
He he,

A long time ago, in a galaxy far away, i was dating my first love (3 years. It started at 20 and ended around 23)

Anyway, we had given each other many gifts, cards, etc, and i truly cherished those she gave me.

When we broke up, and it became obvious that we weren't going to get back together, I went off the deep end and threw everything she ever gave to me away.

I had bought her a "promise ring" which back then cost me a fair heap of money for a poor university student. She had returned it to me when i so arrogantly demanded it back. (I won't bore you with details about why our relationship ended, just let's say it was not my doing.)

Anyway, all the clothes she ever bought me went into the salvation army bin. Some tools that she had bought me were given away / discarded. The cards and letters went into the trash.

The ring??

Well, I heaved that off a pier into Lake Ontario one summer's night. That along with a gold pen set and this crystal thing she bought me.

Regrets???

You bet. I regret ever asking her for that ring back regardless, and I regret everything else that was tossed.

I was very very hurt and acting emotionally thinking that it would help erase the pain. I don't think that it did to tell you the truth.
james t kirk is offline  
Old 01-03-2004, 11:44 PM   #24 (permalink)
Warrior Smith
 
Fire's Avatar
 
Location: missouri
coolest thing I ever heard of doing in this situ came to me from a good friend- found out his fiancee was cheating on him and they broke up- he took every thing she had given him ( and I mean everything) - boxed it up in a big t.v. box and labled it in marker "BOX OF LIES" and sent it to her.... Yes he was very bitter- and imho he had every right to be- anyhoo he is much better now , and in a great relationship.
__________________
Thought the harder, Heart the bolder,
Mood the more as our might lessens
Fire is offline  
Old 01-04-2004, 12:15 AM   #25 (permalink)
Pissing in the cornflakes
 
Ustwo's Avatar
 
Naked pictures - Keep for internet posting.

Rest - Toss, it doesn't help having a constant reminder, and by the time you can be nostalgic, most of it will be worthless anyways.

But thats me, I was never big on gift giving or gift getting, so its not like any relationships I was in gave me piles of stuff to deal with. In fact thats one of the issues I settled pretty quickly with the women I was with, and it always seemed to work out well.
__________________
Agents of the enemies who hold office in our own government, who attempt to eliminate our "freedoms" and our "right to know" are posting among us, I fear.....on this very forum. - host

Obama - Know a Man by the friends he keeps.
Ustwo is offline  
Old 01-04-2004, 06:53 AM   #26 (permalink)
Psycho
 
Location: northern california
I had a boyfriend several years ago who made a mold of his erection and created a dildo from it... I've kept that memento for years.. Frankly I dont miss him at all now that i have,,, hehehehehe never mind...
__________________
...We find ourselves in a struggle for our very right to exsist... We will not go quietly into the night... We will not give up without a fight...
vveronica is offline  
Old 01-04-2004, 10:46 AM   #27 (permalink)
Enter Title Here
 
Location: Tennessee
Toss it. I never keep the stuff unless I forget about it. If you moved on, why keep it?
Bamrak is offline  
Old 01-04-2004, 10:52 AM   #28 (permalink)
Tilted
 
Just found one from 15 years ago just before logging on. It was a permission slip to abuse her body anyway I saw fit. She was an aerobics instructor! Too bad she was nuts. It's going to the county archive this wednesday.
tdoc is offline  
Old 01-04-2004, 06:03 PM   #29 (permalink)
Upright
 
I think that keeping the shit is a good idea. Maybe not everything, but some things. Things that remind you of good times, things that remind you of who you used to be.

you can't lose touch with your past, you can learn from it and grow though.

I still have stuff in my basement from my first serious relationship. Letters that were passed back and forth during Algebra class, lots of them infact. Every once in a while it's nice to look at them and see the conversations we had on paper, some of the odd remarks that were made.
Man, good times.

I actually get along and still communicate with my X's though. When i find stuff from peole i no lnoger talk to, most of it gets tossed, but a few momentos stay.
grouchie is offline  
Old 01-04-2004, 07:24 PM   #30 (permalink)
Here
 
World's King's Avatar
 
Location: Denver City Denver
Oddly I don't have anything from my X-fiance... she took it all back. But the girl I dated before her made me keep everything. Even the shit I gave her. It's all in a box in my closet where it belongs. Covered in dust. And utterly worthless... just like she is.
__________________
heavy is the head that wears the crown
World's King is offline  
Old 01-15-2004, 05:23 PM   #31 (permalink)
narcissist
 
Location: looking in a mirror
I actually have kept most of the notes, pictures, etc from my only two serious relationships.

The first one was a total storybook "16, blah blah blah, innocent, yada yada yada" kinda thing (okay, it wasn't, but I chose to live in denial). Keeping that stuff has reminded me of my "first love".

The other relationship was a HUGE part of my life for a long time, so I've kept a lot of that stuff. Plus, it was pretty recent.


The way I see it, those are the true momentos of highschool. And I'd like to look back on the relationships based on those love letters and smiling pictures instead of the "great guy from the pretzel store" that my recent ex ran off with or "hey, remember when I was secretly entertaining prospective boyfriends at hush-hush pool parties while we dated?" Actually they weren't so secretive...seems I was the only one that didn't know.

Just makes it easier to glaze over the pain...one of my specialties.
__________________
it's all about self-indulgence
majik_6 is offline  
Old 01-15-2004, 05:26 PM   #32 (permalink)
Psycho
 
Location: California
I still have the momentos from my girl friend of 8 years ago...they are in some box somewhere
__________________
Stuff is Good
bonehed1 is offline  
Old 01-16-2004, 08:50 PM   #33 (permalink)
Crazy
 
I burned pretty much all of it.

The nekkid pics I'm saving for when she gets married, just so I can use the famous line ...

Me: "Got any naked pictures of your wife?"
Him: "No."
Me: "Want some?"
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by analog
Just ask her why the hell she got rid of all the meat... and then tell her you'd rather die young with a cheeseburger in your hand and a smile on your face than old with a grimace and a refrigerator full of rabbit food.
AlCap0wn is offline  
Old 01-17-2004, 07:17 AM   #34 (permalink)
Banned
 
Location: Massachusetts, USA
Mementos of ex's? I have a few, but they're usable on their own, and not gifts per se. One turned me on to a particular musical performer, for instance. I'm NOT tossing the CDs.
denim is offline  
Old 01-17-2004, 07:46 AM   #35 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: Arlington, VA
I keep a few momentos around.

Even though I am no longer with that person, they were still very much a part of my life.

Its good to look back every now and again and realise how silly we really were.
aintyoboyfriend is offline  
Old 01-17-2004, 10:33 AM   #36 (permalink)
Degenerate
 
Aladdin Sane's Avatar
 
Location: San Marvelous
I had a very nice collection of naked pics from every serious gf, and then some. When I got married, I threw them all away. I wish I still had them now. That's not to say I'm not happily married, 'cause I am. I would just like to have them for masturbation.
__________________
Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam.
Aladdin Sane is offline  
Old 01-17-2004, 10:45 AM   #37 (permalink)
Dreams In Digital
 
SiNai's Avatar
 
Location: Iowa
Weird.

I have a few pictures of past girlfriends I keep around in out-of-the-way places just to remind me of the good times, but not more than the pictures of everything else that has happened to me. Besides that, I've kept all the emails I've been sent from girls interested in me just because I have no heart to press the 'delete' button, and it's interesting to go through them sometimes.
__________________
I can't seem to remember now
What it was like- to live life, before you.. symbiont
SiNai is offline  
Old 01-17-2004, 11:59 AM   #38 (permalink)
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
 
*Nikki*'s Avatar
 
Location: Charleston, SC
After my ex and I broke up a I got rid of a lot of stuff. After six years with someone that is a lot of memories.

I still have all the cards and pictures though.

I don't want to throw those away bc they were a large part of my life and I do believe that at one time he was completely in love with me.

That is all I need.
*Nikki* is offline  
Old 01-17-2004, 03:56 PM   #39 (permalink)
Psycho
 
Location: wisCONsin
I recently moved into a house that my girlfriend and i bought. I was going thru my pictures that i have accumulated over the years including ex's and i decided to put them to bed....ie the trash can. enuf was enuf. i will probably never see any of them ever again and that is just fine. Time to let it go.

mr b
__________________
"There's an old saying in Tennessee -- I know it's in Texas, it's probably in Tennessee --that says, fool me once, shame on ... shame on you. Fool me ... You can't get fooled again." - G.W. Bush quoted by the Baltimore Sun - Oct 6, 2002
mrbuck12000 is offline  
Old 01-18-2004, 12:33 PM   #40 (permalink)
Junkie
 
SabrinaFair's Avatar
 
Location: Louisville, KY
I have a lot of mementos from former relationships...I do a lot of scrapbooking type stuff, so that's one reason. Another is that I've never really parted on bad terms with a former lover. Might as well keep that stuff for a few laughs when you're reminiscing. I don't know...I find my old relationships to be hillarious, but that's just me.
__________________
"With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful. Strive to be happy."
-Desiderata
SabrinaFair is offline  
 

Tags
long, mementos


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 01:38 AM.

Tilted Forum Project

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
© 2002-2012 Tilted Forum Project

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36