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#1 (permalink) |
On the lam
Location: northern va
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why guys are so quiet in bed
Perhaps this explains it (CLICK ME!)...
would be curious to hear reactions from women--do men do all the work, while women lay back and see what the guy has to offer? in my experience too, it's been that way. very generally speaking.
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oh baby oh baby, i like gravy. |
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#2 (permalink) |
Addict
Location: Amish-land, PA
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I blame it on porn.
Basic masculine reaction - don't let on that you enjoy it, or else she owns you.
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"I've made only one mistake in my life. But I made it over and over and over. That was saying 'yes' when I meant 'no'. Forgive me." |
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#5 (permalink) |
Upright
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i constantly catch myself acting totally based on the feedback i get from the lady.
but maybe it works the other way round -- if men actually gave as much feedback as women, then women would also fall into the realtime analysis and preemptive execution trap. and, hell, how does this keep you from moaning? |
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#6 (permalink) |
Is mad at you.
Location: Bored in Sacramento
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Its true enough. I figure, as a guy, I will probably end up having an orgasm simply because intercourse has started. I don't need to worry about getting off... if we are having sex, very little is going to stop me. This means I'm good. Well, kind of good... if I want to keep doing this, she needs to have fun. So I spend A LOT of time trying to make sure this is an activity she is going to enjoy and want to do again.
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This too shall pass. |
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#7 (permalink) |
Natalie Portman is sexy.
Location: The Outer Rim
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I don't think I'm quiet, but then again I don't talk non-stop. I try to make sure she has her fun before I finish.
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"While the State exists there can be no freedom. When there is freedom there will be no State." - Vladimir Ilyich Lenin "Reason has always existed, but not always in a reasonable form."- Karl Marx |
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#9 (permalink) |
The Pusher
Location: Edinburgh
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I'm always quiet in bed, but that's because it doesn't come naturally to me to go 'Ahh, ooh, mmm". If I do it sounds very forced and I feel like an idiot for doing it!
And my partners have always let/made me do all the work. My most recent partner hated being on top because it was too much work for her to move for more than thirty seconds. Instead I was always on top and had to do ALL the work. And if she didn't come she'd say 'It's ok! It's no big deal!' and towards the end I began to think 'Of course it's ok. If you aren't helping at all then of course it's ok if you don't come." |
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#10 (permalink) |
The Northern Ward
Location: Columbus, Ohio
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I'm a dervish of comedic genius myself. I have fun with it.
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"I went shopping last night at like 1am. The place was empty and this old woman just making polite conversation said to me, 'where is everyone??' I replied, 'In bed, same place you and I should be!' Took me ten minutes to figure out why she gave me a dirty look." --Some guy |
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#13 (permalink) |
Psycho
Location: The capital of the free world??
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I hate it how guys are so quiet, until they orgasm, then they usually start moaning a little bit. But I think its true that they sorta are concentrated on other things. Whenever I´m on top I´m not as noisy because I´m doing all the work.
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Go Kool Aid. OH YEAAHH http://www.retrocrush.com/archive2003/koolaid/ |
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#14 (permalink) |
Addict
Location: Texas
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I'm quiet mostly, because I am typically enthralled and focused on the moment, the sensation and the intimacy.. I always kind of feel like anything I say might just be stupid... I know what my orgasm face looks like, who KNOWS what I'd sound like. :-D but try humming a merry tune while performing cunnilingus, you might find you have spider-woman who can climb the walls!!!
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Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana. |
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#15 (permalink) |
Desert Rat
Location: Arizona
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I consider sex to be more like talking with emotion and body language. No need to open my mouth and fuck things up.
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"This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is it vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished, as the once vital voice of the verisimilitude now venerates what they once vilified. However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose vis-à-vis an introduction, and so it is my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V." - V |
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#16 (permalink) |
big damn hero
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I think it's part concentration and part conditioning.
Guys masturbate. A lot. We have to lest our head explodes ![]() Because we learn at such a young age and because there is a little bit of embarassment and shame in the act we learn to do it quietly. Do it in the shower; can't let 'em know what I'm doing. Do it in bed at night; can't let 'em know what I'm doing. et cetera et cetera. I think that habit of just being quiet carries over when we start having sex. Mix that in with fierce concentration and it's a wonder we relax enough to get anything done at all.
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No signature. None. Seriously. |
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#18 (permalink) | |
Minion of the scaléd ones
Location: Northeast Jesusland
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Quote:
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Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life. |
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#19 (permalink) |
Here
Location: Denver City Denver
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I had an X tell me I looked like I was doin' my taxes while we had sex.
I guess I used to take it really serious and never smile. That's all changed... I'm to the point of laughter during orgasm.
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heavy is the head that wears the crown |
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#21 (permalink) |
Free Mars!
Location: I dunno, there's white people around me saying "eh" all the time
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Lets put it this way...
Would it be better if us guys moan and scream and go "Oh yeah Oh yeah!!! Oh fuckin yea!" Sorry but I think I would prefer to be quiet... Although guthmund's comments got some merit
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Looking out the window, that's an act of war. Staring at my shoes, that's an act of war. Committing an act of war? Oh you better believe that's an act of war |
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#22 (permalink) |
Psycho
Location: Down Under
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That link is true in many ways. I'm always busy making sure that my girl is happy and I'm doing all the right things. I've had other women in the past that were prepared to drive more often but they are rare, and even then. It's up to us guys to look after things.. just my 2 cents worth!
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#23 (permalink) |
Upright
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The reason were quite during sex is
its hard to imagine doing your mom or sister or jillian barberie if were moaning or groaning so we keep quiet to keep the illusion going lol.......that and its not manly to make noise and if you do it once youre expected to do it every time after whether the sex is moan worthy or not.
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#24 (permalink) | |
My own person -- his by choice
Location: Lebell's arms
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Quote:
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If you can go deeply into lovemaking, the ego disappears. That is the beauty of lovemaking, that it is another source of a glimpse of god It's not about being perfect; it's about developing some skill at managing imperfection. |
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#26 (permalink) |
Insane
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I talk some, make sure shes getting exactly what she wants, make sure she's yay close from touching heaven so I can bring her back down and work her up again and I dont keep anything inside in terms of moaning, etc. No this doesnt mean I exaggerate anything, I just do what I do, dont think about it.
Every time you make love to someone,a little piece of you sould die in the attempt. If it doesnt you're either not doing something right or you're just not in love. I know a little piece of me dies every time. ![]() |
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#29 (permalink) |
Surviving Hurricanes
Location: Miami, Florida
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I think with lots of practice you get more vocal... at least that was the case with me... the first several times i did it i wasnt vocal at all, but as i got more comfortable with the girl(s) i became more vocal and well, i dont hold back... it feels better that way
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#30 (permalink) |
Crazy
Location: Tacoma, WA
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I 'think' part of the quietness of guys is that our orgasms aren't as intense and pleasurable as female orgasms.
Also men have to try and postpone there orgasm to last longer which equals less pleasure, while women can cum as much as they want multiple times without worrying about being embarrased cumming too quickly. Sorry for the late post |
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#32 (permalink) |
Beware the Mad Irish
Location: Wish I was on the N17...
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I think blaming it on porn is like blaming mashed potatos on the mixer.
At least part of the reason is that from a very early age when men learn to masturbate they are doing so secretly to avoid being caught, embarrased, etc so they do so in quiet and it just becomes a learned thing. The good part is that you can unlearn that and get your howl & growl on!
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What are you willing to give up in order to get what you want? |
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#33 (permalink) |
follower of the child's crusade?
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I think it would be quite cool to sing patriotic songs during sex. But I never have.
I think, just personally, I would agree with TM... although I dont think porn has a lot to do with it in my case. It's just a personal, I dont know if it is also a masculine, instinct for me to try and contain my emotions, never to show any more signs of feeling something than you can help. I mean, the same reason as men cry less than women I would think... somewhere you are conditioned to hold it all down, and keep your feelings inside.
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"Do not tell lies, and do not do what you hate, for all things are plain in the sight of Heaven. For nothing hidden will not become manifest, and nothing covered will remain without being uncovered." The Gospel of Thomas |
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#34 (permalink) |
Über-Rookie
Location: No longer, D.C
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I am extremely quiet in bed, so much so that a girlfriend who deemed herself quiet thought she was loud when compared to me.
very funny link, by the way ![]()
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"All that we can do is just survive. .All that we can do to help ourselves is stay alive." - Rush |
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#35 (permalink) |
Tilted
Location: Washington
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Wow, this is so spot on.
The comments get right to the point too. Learned behaviour from masturbation and deep thought make perfect sense. I'm going to try Strange Famous' suggestion of singing patriotic songs though.
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It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. -Aristotle |
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#37 (permalink) | |
Loser
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Quote:
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#39 (permalink) |
A Real American
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Luckily my gf has a hair trigger. I can literally make her orgasm with a simple change in angle and about 20-30 strokes scraping her super sensitive gspot. I do hold off so I can give her about 6-10 orgasms per fuck tho. I make noise when I hit a good spot for me, but since it's a lot harder for me to get off I have to concentrate so I don't say much.
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I happen to like the words "fuck", "cock", "pussy", "tits", "cunt", "twat", "shit" and even "bitch". As long as I am not using them to describe you, don't go telling me whether or not I can/should use them...that is, if you want me to continue refraining from using them to describe you. ~Prince |
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#40 (permalink) |
Hiya Puddin'! Miss me?
Location: Silicon Valley, CA
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Ok, so I'm pretty sure we all recognize that women are much more complex when it comes to sex. There's all these places you have to pay attention to like the clitoris and boobs and ears and the neck and the list keeps going. Well, that's just one of the senses! We (generally speaking, now) need stimulus from the other ones, too! Sight and hearing are one of the two most important sense next to touch. (Don't believe me? Check out my Human Sexuality textbook, Sight and Hearing are listed *before* Touch.)
Every wonder why candlelight and rose petals are a cliché? Well, now you know. Make noises, guys! (Of course, if she tells you to shut up, then by all means listen to her. However, I doubt any woman will tell you to be quiet.) P.S. And by noises, I don't mean sleazy cheap porn noises like, "Oh baby, that's the way Daddy likes it." Unless, of course, she asks you to sound like that! We're all different. :P
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=^-^= motdakasha =^-^= Just Google It. BA Psychology & Photography (I'm not going psychoanalyze you nor will I let you cry on my shoulder. Have a nice day.) Last edited by motdakasha; 01-25-2004 at 02:31 PM.. |
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bed, guys, quiet |
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