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#1 (permalink) |
Here
Location: Denver City Denver
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Drunken Sex/The Other Guy
Okay so in a drunken stooper I slept with a very nice girl last night. Yeah... we had great sex on the floor in her kitchen, up against the TV, in the bathroom, half under the bed... Okay you get the idea.
I met her at the bar I hang out in all the time (every night). We talked all night and hit it off right away. Well, she called me today to tell me something that just "slipped her mind" last night. She has a boyfriend that she's been with for a while. He's in Europe on buisness for however long... His name is Rob. So any of you peopel in Europe meet a guy named Rob... beat him up... Anyway. She didn't seem to off about it. She just said that she would understand if I didn't want to see her again but seeing as how we hang out in the same place we are going to see each other. Moral issue here. Do I keep talking to her in hopes that she breaks up with Europe Rob or do I forget about it and thank God I was wearing a condom... I think? What would you do if you were to get housed and do this.... with a girl that was drunk enough to forget she loved someone else? Help. EDIT: If she slept with me after knowing me four hours... her relationship must not be too good.
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heavy is the head that wears the crown Last edited by The Original King; 01-11-2004 at 07:36 PM.. |
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#3 (permalink) |
green
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keep talking to her but don't consider yourself as being in a serious relationship with her if even a relationship at all. if she shows no signs of breaking up with rob make yourself increasingly scarce. if she DOES show signs, come onto her a little bit more and show her you're interested so she has something to go to when she does break up with him.
that is if you are interested...
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Your arms are broken! |
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#4 (permalink) |
don't ignore this-->
Location: CA
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if she really loved this other guy she wouldn't forget something like that. If their relationship was open then it wouldn't matter and she probably would've said so. I'd say keep talking to her if you have to share space with her, but i wouldn't expect anything more out of it.
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I am the very model of a moderator gentleman. |
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#6 (permalink) |
/nɑndəsˈkrɪpt/
Location: LV-426
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To me the key thing here is that you didn't know about Rob until afterwards. Now you do.
Basically, she cheated on her boyfriend and seems like she might do it again. As a general rule of thumb, it's a good idea not to touch a man's woman. You don't know this man, and you have the perfect opportunity to walk away with a good memory and a relatively clear conscience. However, if you DO talk to her again, chances are good she'll put the moves on you again... And this time you'll know there's a boyfriend. I'd skip on the drama that can come as a result of this. She was a good lay, great, time to move on. Even if she ended up breaking up with Rob, would you want to get in a relationship with this girl, who doesn't seem to have qualms about cheating? Like I said...not worth the headache.
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Who is John Galt? |
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#8 (permalink) |
Tilted
Location: EU
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Well I'm from Europe ànd I know a guy named Rob, and if he is your ladies guy, then I wouldn't worry about it - she'll be yours in no time
![]() ![]() What's love got ot do with it? And if it has something to do with it, then I feel sorry that you slept with this woman "on the floor in her kitchen, up against the TV, in the bathroom, half under the bed" after having known her for you're so called edit "four hours" - how and why would you feel to ask advice after you banged a druk woman like that - do you see a future together? ![]() |
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#9 (permalink) | |
beauty in the breakdown
Location: Chapel Hill, NC
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Quote:
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"Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws." --Plato |
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#10 (permalink) | |
Here
Location: Denver City Denver
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Quote:
I used the word love as a joke.
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heavy is the head that wears the crown |
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#11 (permalink) |
Tilted
Location: EU
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ok - well as I said before:
if she has a "Rob" and if she's banging other guys when drunk then she's got a real problem and you may have/get one to whenever you'de have to go on a business trip to Europe ![]() Maybe you're special, maybe Rob is a fool - and she may be "all that" and who knows she may prove to be a fantastic mate, all I'm saying is that you'de beter watch out with this girl - I think that "getting a commitment" will have to be explict on her side if you want to follow this trough - since she just said that she would understand if I didn't want to see her again - it doesn't sound like a person who really is mad about you, and so it's up to you to decide if you want to bet on it or not, the least one could say is that she's not a "sure thing" ![]() |
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#12 (permalink) |
Eccentric insomniac
Location: North Carolina
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You are not responsible for the fidelity of others.
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"Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery." - Winston Churchill "All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act out their dream with open eyes, to make it possible." Seven Pillars of Wisdom, T.E. Lawrence |
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#13 (permalink) |
Registered User
Location: Oklahoma
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You have no problems now, but trying to stick around in hopes she loses the current boyfriend is a losing proposition. This kind of girl (one who would sleep with someone after 4 hours and one who did it while knowingly having a boyfriend) is someone you don't want to get involved with.
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#14 (permalink) | |
Hiya Puddin'! Miss me?
Location: Silicon Valley, CA
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(Worst thing you could do is try to persuade or pressure her because if anything goes wrong she can run back to Rob or blame you.)
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=^-^= motdakasha =^-^= Just Google It. BA Psychology & Photography (I'm not going psychoanalyze you nor will I let you cry on my shoulder. Have a nice day.) |
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#15 (permalink) | |
Insane
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Quote:
What you have to ask yourself is this: "what do I want from this girl?" If the answer is hot non-committed sex, then she may be right for you. If the answer is you would like to replace her boyfriend and have a relationship with her, then I suspect you would be making a big mistake. Once a cheater, always a cheater and all that jazz. |
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#16 (permalink) |
Upright
Location: Vermont
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I met my wife under similar circumstances. She had a boyfriend in CO. and was living in Montreal. We didn't do the one night stand drunken stupor sex binge but we did hit it off right away. If she seems interested in you go for it....if she doesn't ditch Euorob within thr first couple dates back off and hope Rob isn't some kind of prize fighting champion.
Chris Last edited by spazaddict; 01-12-2004 at 05:40 AM.. |
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#17 (permalink) |
Tilted
Location: Texas
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It seems like this relationship can go several different directions. It is important for you to be careful though, and not invest too much until you know what her plans are.
If you get hung up on her and are still side tail, she'll be lying and sneaking around to see you. This can be very frustrating if you want more than sex from her. But, if she is wanting to move on from the old relationship she'll let you know. As long as you know what you want from her you'll know how to protect yourself. |
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#18 (permalink) |
Addict
Location: Harlem
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You owe Rob nothing. Sex is sex and is often best left as such. Getting into a relationship with this girl is just going to get your feelings all hurt when you leave town for a couple weeks and she shacks up with another bar guy.
Theres nothing wrong with being fuckbuddies as long as you use a condom. Nothing at all.
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I know Nietzsche doesnt rhyme with peachy, but you sound like a pretentious prick when you correct me. |
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#19 (permalink) |
Loser
Location: ski town
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I'd do her up against the car, in the back door, anywhere and everyway possible foir as long as possible. You don't get drunk and forget you have a boyfriend. She was horney and needed it. If you can fulfill her needs good for you. Just try not to become too attached to her until she decided where her and her BF are going. Even then if you do get attached to her remember she cheated on her BF to be with you and she will likely do it again.
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#20 (permalink) |
Over caffeinated
Location: One Step Closer to the Edge
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What comes to mind for me is RUN she sounds like she is bad news. What stops her from doing the same thing to you this chick sounds like bad news just thank her for the lovin but leave her be.
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Zer010giC |
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#21 (permalink) |
Crazy
Location: Missouri
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When I met my wife we hit it off so well if we would have been with other people I think we would have broken up. But we were already single so we will never know.
But for us it was an instant thing. She came back to my apartment the first night we met. We talked until late in the morning. I slept on the couch and gave her my bed. (STUDIO)... We stuck together like glue. We had sex a couple weeks later. She moved in a couple weeks after that. We we married a couple years later. Moral of the story: When its right, its right no matter whats wrong.
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If its not broke I'm prolly not done yet. |
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#22 (permalink) |
hovering in the distance
Location: the land of milk and honey
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ahhh, i love the way everyone (meaning her, this time) blames alchohol for there own misadventures. -oh, i was drunk so you must forgive me- bullshit. obviously the guy in europe means nothing, and she would probably do the same to you if you were out of town. glad the sex was good, but i would probably move on.
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#23 (permalink) |
Boy am I horny today
Location: T O L E D O, Toledo!!
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Okay, here's my take. She needed a little lovin' and you just happened to be the guy, albeit she may find you more than just a lay, esp. since she contacted you again. Personally, if I had a this happen, I think I would talk to her again, and again, but try to keep anything phyiscal out, until you know it's right.
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#24 (permalink) | |
Crazy
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Quote:
I always said I would never date a girl who cheats. But I did. And 5 years later I married her. We recently passed the 7 year itch milestone...still goin' strong! |
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#28 (permalink) | |
Junkie
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Quote:
![]() I would also like to add that we males suck too, in the same sense. Being human is sucky business I'm afraid ![]()
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The most important thing in this world is love. |
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#29 (permalink) |
Warrior Smith
Location: missouri
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RUN- one, I have to agree with the whole "slut" take of other people- for another, its one thing when the girl doesn't tell you about another guy- surely not your fault- another thing entirely when you fuck her knowing that she is with someone else- also- what keeps her from using you as a "dick in a jar" and stringing you along painfully/ using you- doesn't sound too good/healthy a proposition to me.
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Thought the harder, Heart the bolder, Mood the more as our might lessens |
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#31 (permalink) |
Junkie
Location: Up yonder
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I don't care how drunk you are - you don't "forget" you have a boyfriend! I mean please!
![]() The general thought here seems to be that if she screwed around on her boyfriend, then she would do the same to you. I agree.
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You've been a naughty boy....go to my room! |
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#32 (permalink) | |
Tone.
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#33 (permalink) |
Upright
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i don't get the judgmentalism of these posts. if you want to be with her some more (until the other Unit comes back).. i would.. i have... it worked out as okay as anything (nothing ever is perfect).
Maybe it supposed to be you and she. maybe she got horny waiting for Rob and just scratched the itch... let' see.. Europe... oh yeah they have women there too, and .. i would, i did... So now she told you, so as someone else wrote now its different. If you want to know how it is, talk to her about it and see. I dont' think you owe Rob anything, but actually trying to "break them up" would be bad form and bad karma. enjoying some more of what's hot with her while she is in the mood is what I would do, if it's what i wanted to do. |
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#34 (permalink) | |
Crazy
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Should have made a poll here ...
I'm with the "Hit it" crowd here. You don't owe Rob squat, and you're getting good (great?) sex. Just make sure that you both understand the terms of the relationship, whatever they may be. Give her one for me. ![]()
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#38 (permalink) | |
Insane
Location: Arlington, VA
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Re: Drunken Sex/The Other Guy
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If that is the case, you should keep her around, so if she does break up with Rob you can take care of the physical without the relationship part. Plus it is always nice to have a buddy at the bar you hang out in just in case. ![]() |
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#39 (permalink) | |
TFP Mad Scientist
Location: Philadelphia, PA
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Re: Drunken Sex/The Other Guy
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I'd recommend you just forget about her and leave her be.... If she gets with you by betraying another man, who says she won't do the same to you if you two ever do get together?
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Doncalypso... the one and only Haitian Sensation |
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Tags |
drunken, guy, sex or the |
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