How long between Significant others? - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Harshaw · 11-29-2003, 07:24 PM

I'm just wondering how long most people go between significant others. I work with someone who seems to have zero turn around time, while I had over 5 years last time. I'm just wondering what is normal for the normal TFPer.

skysooner · 11-29-2003, 08:39 PM

Anywhere from a couple of weeks to up to 2 years. It all depended upon the circumstance of the breakup and how busy I was. The 2 year thing was when I was in graduate school and had absolutely no time for dating. This was the period when I used prostitutes or strippers mainly for sexual gratification and didn't put any emotional time in. A couple of weeks was right after this period when the girl I was dating went nuts on me (she was manic depressive), and I met my wife 2 weeks after we broke up.

OzOz · 12-01-2003, 02:56 AM

For me it was over three years between my first and second, mostly because I'm quite shy and not good at meeting women. Number two only lasted a couple of months before she had to leave due to visa problems. That was eight months ago. Still looking for number three.

mistered · 12-01-2003, 04:16 AM

It was about a year for me. I think it's always good to just step back and not get too serious right away.

rogue49 · 12-01-2003, 04:21 AM

It takes me a few years...
I'm not one to call someone my SO just to do so
and dating for a month doesn't count.

SparklingDot · 12-01-2003, 11:12 PM

Well, it has ranged anywhere between one day and a year. No, I'm not proud of the new-guy-next-day thing, but he and I have been together for over 3 years now. It all depends on what you need to recover. Average rule of thumb is two weeks between boyfriends.

Battlefield · 12-02-2003, 12:56 AM

For me it takes awhile to 'love' someone again, and it depends on how much you loved that person, and also if you meet anyone that can even compare

Bloodslick · 12-02-2003, 05:42 AM

Well, let's see. In the past it has taken a few months for me to find someone interesting again, but for my last two breakups, I was already "involved" with the new woman. Does that count as negative turn around?

anti fishstick · 12-02-2003, 02:33 PM

it took me a year.
but the longest i've been completely single since i've started dating is 4 months.

wilbjammin · 12-02-2003, 02:41 PM

Quote:

Well, let's see. In the past it has taken a few months for me to find someone interesting again, but for my last two breakups, I was already "involved" with the new woman. Does that count as negative turn around?

I think it would count as zero. And one a side note, this reminds me very much of "the rotation method" coined by Kierkegaard.

...Are you a seducer?

As for me. It took a couple weeks after the end of a long-failing relationship with my first girlfriend, and I've been single for about 1 1/2 months after the second girlfriend. And that's it... no idea when I'll have a girlfriend again.

raeanna74 · 12-02-2003, 05:08 PM

Between first boyfriend and second it was Zero time. My first boyfriend was actually abusive. My second one was a huge help in breaking the first guy's hold on me and also chasing him away. Before I got serious with the second guy I was already to the point where I wanted to break things off but wasn't strong enough to do so because number one kept ignoring my statements and calling and basically harrassing my whole family. The second guy I actually got engaged to but he was deaf and I was not it was a difficult adjustment and our 10 year age difference was too much as well. Number 3 was about 3 or 4 years later with only a couple single dates with others in between. That lasted only 3 months. Then another year and I met hubby. I guess the average would be about

1.3 years in between each relationship.

motdakasha · 12-02-2003, 05:10 PM

The first significant other I had was when I was underaged. I have not been with a person long enough to consider them significant, yet. So make that 4 years and counting...

11-29-2003, 07:24 PM	#1 (permalink)
Harshaw Is mad at you. Location: Bored in Sacramento	How long between Significant others? I'm just wondering how long most people go between significant others. I work with someone who seems to have zero turn around time, while I had over 5 years last time. I'm just wondering what is normal for the normal TFPer. __________________ This too shall pass.

12-01-2003, 02:56 AM	#3 (permalink)
OzOz Psycho Location: Right here, right now.	For me it was over three years between my first and second, mostly because I'm quite shy and not good at meeting women. Number two only lasted a couple of months before she had to leave due to visa problems. That was eight months ago. Still looking for number three. __________________ Maybe you should put some shorts on or something, if you wanna keep fighting evil today.

12-01-2003, 11:12 PM	#6 (permalink)
SparklingDot Insane	Well, it has ranged anywhere between one day and a year. No, I'm not proud of the new-guy-next-day thing, but he and I have been together for over 3 years now. It all depends on what you need to recover. Average rule of thumb is two weeks between boyfriends. __________________ 17 seconds is all you really need - Smashing Pumpkins

12-02-2003, 02:33 PM	#9 (permalink)
anti fishstick Post-modernism meets Individualism AKA the Clash Location: oregon	it took me a year. but the longest i've been completely single since i've started dating is 4 months. __________________ And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. ~Anais Nin

12-02-2003, 05:08 PM	#11 (permalink)
raeanna74 I'm not a blonde! I'm knot! I'm knot! I'm knot! Location: Upper Michigan	Between first boyfriend and second it was Zero time. My first boyfriend was actually abusive. My second one was a huge help in breaking the first guy's hold on me and also chasing him away. Before I got serious with the second guy I was already to the point where I wanted to break things off but wasn't strong enough to do so because number one kept ignoring my statements and calling and basically harrassing my whole family. The second guy I actually got engaged to but he was deaf and I was not it was a difficult adjustment and our 10 year age difference was too much as well. Number 3 was about 3 or 4 years later with only a couple single dates with others in between. That lasted only 3 months. Then another year and I met hubby. I guess the average would be about 1.3 years in between each relationship. __________________ "Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama My Karma just ran over your Dogma.

11-29-2003, 08:39 PM	#2 (permalink)
skysooner Registered User Location: Oklahoma	Anywhere from a couple of weeks to up to 2 years. It all depended upon the circumstance of the breakup and how busy I was. The 2 year thing was when I was in graduate school and had absolutely no time for dating. This was the period when I used prostitutes or strippers mainly for sexual gratification and didn't put any emotional time in. A couple of weeks was right after this period when the girl I was dating went nuts on me (she was manic depressive), and I met my wife 2 weeks after we broke up.

12-01-2003, 04:16 AM	#4 (permalink)
mistered Tilted	It was about a year for me. I think it's always good to just step back and not get too serious right away.

12-01-2003, 04:21 AM	#5 (permalink)
rogue49 Loser	It takes me a few years... I'm not one to call someone my SO just to do so and dating for a month doesn't count.

12-02-2003, 12:56 AM	#7 (permalink)
Battlefield Crazy	For me it takes awhile to 'love' someone again, and it depends on how much you loved that person, and also if you meet anyone that can even compare

12-02-2003, 05:42 AM	#8 (permalink)
Bloodslick Loser Location: a darkened back alley	Well, let's see. In the past it has taken a few months for me to find someone interesting again, but for my last two breakups, I was already "involved" with the new woman. Does that count as negative turn around?

12-02-2003, 05:10 PM	#12 (permalink)
motdakasha Hiya Puddin'! Miss me? Location: Silicon Valley, CA	The first significant other I had was when I was underaged. I have not been with a person long enough to consider them significant, yet. So make that 4 years and counting... __________________ =^-^= motdakasha =^-^= Just Google It. BA Psychology & Photography (I'm not going psychoanalyze you nor will I let you cry on my shoulder. Have a nice day.)