Not talking..... - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

prince_albert · 10-26-2003, 07:14 AM

Right, I met someone on another forum, we like eachother allot. Anyway, to the point, she never really talks about her. Like, nothing, I try to talk about myself, I have told her all my personal stuff, but she never, ever talks to me...I don't know, I mean, not even worthy someone's trust can be be pretty harsh

I don't know what to do, I don't want to be pushy and ask her to talk all the time, on the other hand it really hurts me, the fact that she never talks to me.

....

Harshaw · 10-26-2003, 07:25 AM

I had this problem with my GF. This was before we were dating, but it was pretty obvious that we had clicked. I think it is a trust thing, I trused her about 100 times more than she trusted me. It is a problem that is solved by time and gentle pressure. Just ask her what she things about things that you have told her etc.. You have to kind of pull her into telling you things.

It sucks, its annoying that she knows all your secrets and you know none of hers. But if she begins to realize she can trust you, things will happen.

prince_albert · 10-26-2003, 07:30 AM

Well, in that forum she had posted about things she has never told me about, I found that out by mistake actually so I stop reading her post because I wanted her to tell me.
Its like, she trusts anyone that goes in the forum but not me.

Harshaw · 10-26-2003, 07:38 AM

That could be because most forums give a feeling of anonymity. I mean, I have an alias instead of a name, I could go into stuff here that I wouldn't want to confess to anyone I know in real life. In forums, it is harder for people to judge you.

prince_albert · 10-26-2003, 07:39 AM

I don't know, we haven't even met, we live in different countries, if she tells me that she wants to be with someone else I will understand.

I just need to know.

arch13 · 10-26-2003, 09:52 AM

There can be almost a comfort for some in the format of the forum post.
Perhaps what you two should do if your both interested is move the conversation to someplace like AIM (though i'm not big on instant messaging since it's still anon) or real email. Real email seems good since it requires you two to reveal at least somethings about each other in order to have each others address's and gives an ability for contact not regularly found in the forums since they KNOW you recieve their posts. It's a lot less casual than a forum post.
Just my .02 though, Since you haven't said the dynamics of how you two currently communicate.
And as for her forum posts, i wouldn't feel a need to stop reading them. She knows your part of that community and by proxy knows you will read her posts.

prince_albert · 10-26-2003, 04:27 PM

We use msn messenger, I am going to, well hopefully, get a job and have stuff to do at uni so maybe I won't spent so much time at the coputer and use email anyway. If she's not going to tell me in msn she won't in any way of communication, I mean, being open to people about specific things requires you to trust them...but she doesn't I dont know.

10-26-2003, 07:14 AM	#1 (permalink)
prince_albert Banned Location: Bradford, UK	Not talking..... Right, I met someone on another forum, we like eachother allot. Anyway, to the point, she never really talks about her. Like, nothing, I try to talk about myself, I have told her all my personal stuff, but she never, ever talks to me...I don't know, I mean, not even worthy someone's trust can be be pretty harsh I don't know what to do, I don't want to be pushy and ask her to talk all the time, on the other hand it really hurts me, the fact that she never talks to me. ....

10-26-2003, 07:25 AM	#2 (permalink)
Harshaw Is mad at you. Location: Bored in Sacramento	I had this problem with my GF. This was before we were dating, but it was pretty obvious that we had clicked. I think it is a trust thing, I trused her about 100 times more than she trusted me. It is a problem that is solved by time and gentle pressure. Just ask her what she things about things that you have told her etc.. You have to kind of pull her into telling you things. It sucks, its annoying that she knows all your secrets and you know none of hers. But if she begins to realize she can trust you, things will happen. __________________ This too shall pass.

10-26-2003, 07:38 AM	#4 (permalink)
Harshaw Is mad at you. Location: Bored in Sacramento	That could be because most forums give a feeling of anonymity. I mean, I have an alias instead of a name, I could go into stuff here that I wouldn't want to confess to anyone I know in real life. In forums, it is harder for people to judge you. __________________ This too shall pass.

10-26-2003, 09:52 AM	#6 (permalink)
arch13 Loves my girl in thongs Location: North of Mexico, South of Canada	There can be almost a comfort for some in the format of the forum post. Perhaps what you two should do if your both interested is move the conversation to someplace like AIM (though i'm not big on instant messaging since it's still anon) or real email. Real email seems good since it requires you two to reveal at least somethings about each other in order to have each others address's and gives an ability for contact not regularly found in the forums since they KNOW you recieve their posts. It's a lot less casual than a forum post. Just my .02 though, Since you haven't said the dynamics of how you two currently communicate. And as for her forum posts, i wouldn't feel a need to stop reading them. She knows your part of that community and by proxy knows you will read her posts. __________________ Seen on an employer evaluation: "The wheel is turning but the hamsters dead" ____________________________ Is arch13 really a porn diety ? find out after the film at 11. -Nanofever

10-26-2003, 07:30 AM	#3 (permalink)
prince_albert Banned Location: Bradford, UK	Well, in that forum she had posted about things she has never told me about, I found that out by mistake actually so I stop reading her post because I wanted her to tell me. Its like, she trusts anyone that goes in the forum but not me.

10-26-2003, 07:39 AM	#5 (permalink)
prince_albert Banned Location: Bradford, UK	I don't know, we haven't even met, we live in different countries, if she tells me that she wants to be with someone else I will understand. I just need to know.

10-26-2003, 04:27 PM	#7 (permalink)
prince_albert Banned Location: Bradford, UK	We use msn messenger, I am going to, well hopefully, get a job and have stuff to do at uni so maybe I won't spent so much time at the coputer and use email anyway. If she's not going to tell me in msn she won't in any way of communication, I mean, being open to people about specific things requires you to trust them...but she doesn't I dont know.