phunktastic

So theres this girl at work that I've started to like, a lot.. and from what I can tell she thinks the same about me. So great, right? I finally end my too-long singleness!

Only problem is I'm kinda worried about her age. I'm a college freshman (18) and shes a high school junior (16). I know thats not much of a difference (in 10 years we'll be 28 and 26, which sounds fine) , but it seems like it now. There seems to be some kinda stigma about highschool girls when you're out of high school.

So anyway, I don't post here much but this has been on my mind for awhile.. so I figured I'd get some comments/advice here,, you guys seem to have your heads on straight, for the most part

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Mael

i think one of the biggest problems with it would the distance... unless you commute or go to a school close to home. it wouldn't really be "weird" for you two to date, i mean, if you'd met as a high school senior and high school sophomore, and then it were a year later, would you break up? go for it, see if it works.

NewBonk

You may also run into trouble if the two of you mature at different times.

Skettios

This would work fine in my opinion. The only thing that I can think is that you'll get bored with her at school. I mean you're at college with hopefully hot college girls, why would you want a highschool girl?

I think you should do what you want, but I predict in a few months that you will lose interest.

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Sledge

Didn't work for me, but everyone's different.

College made me see that my girlfriend wasn't really what I was looking for.

yellowgowild

If you like her, try it. You'll regret not knowing what it might have been like if you don't. I've been kicking myself in the ass for not dating this one girl when i had the chance only because I was too woried about what people would say.

phredgreen

first off, i've moved this thread to the sexuality board.



now, you're just getting started in what's gonna be the biggest thrill of your life. you're gonna meet so many interesting people, not to mention a great many members of the fairer sex. if it were me, i'd leave her to her high school life and inevitable high school drama, and live my own life, taking advantage of the many oppurtunities you will be presented with. it is ultimately your choice, but i don't see you developing and moving foward in life at the same rate if you still have an anchor to the high school years keeping you from going on.

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IckUber

i did it once.

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motdakasha

(Basically, repeating what everyone else has already said)

Become friends with her. Wait two years. If you're still interested in her, let her know. Reasons why you should wait:
a) You'll meet new people.
b) You'll mature at different rates.
c) Age difference could be an issue, especially depending on her parents. Are they overcontrolling?

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phunktastic

You guys make some good points. I commute to school, but she lives about 40 minutes away from where I live and where I go to school,, kinda the third point on a triangle of all of them I guess,, if that makes any sense.

I definately want to at least be friends with her. I can't remember the last person who's a girl that I've been able to talk to so easily and not be so nervous around.

Her parents aren't really an issue, I met her mom the other day and she seemed to like me.

That said, there are a lot of good ones (visually) at my new school

I think she said she's thinking about going to the same school I am, so maybe it'd be best to stay good friends until she starts going to the same school, and then seeing if it'd work to take it somewhere else.

Anyway, thanks for the input guys and gals,, I needed it!

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"Relax, the world will spin beside itself and suck you in. With threats and hopes beyond compare"

Dale Kemp

Phunktastic,

There's nothing wrong with a 2 year age difference. The problem is that you're pretty young still, and she's just to young.

You're both a couple years to young to form a long term relationship, mostly because you'll both keep maturing, and become "different" people over the next few years.

That said, I think it's great that you be friends. I suggest you write her letters and/or E-mails, and phone her about once a week. Definitely tell her she should date other people, and that you will. You could take her out on a date when you're in her town, but don't let it be exclusive.

Try not to let your relationship with her be sexual. She's still jail bait (in most states), and the reason it's illegal is that society recognizes that she isn't mature enough to make wise choices about sex, or to raise the baby that can be a consequence of it.

If you're still friends when she turns 18, then start dating her more seriously. When she turns 19, if you want to make it permanent, then go to that level.

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Trueheart

lurkette

Just chiming in to reinforce what others have already said.

As you point out, there's a much larger difference between, say, 16 and 18 than between 26 and 28. You are both going through a very formative time, but you're about to embark on a qualitatively different experience that will mature you (hopefully ) in different ways.

And don't forget what Dale Kemp says - statutory rape laws apply in most states, at least for now. Exact ages vary, but, well, cover your ass and wait.

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bermuDa

I was 16 when my last gf was 18, I didn't see anything wrong with that...

But I don't think I'd ever date a girl younger than me.

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The.Lunatic

sounds to me like its not worth your time. Girls like older guys because they always think that they are more mature, more situatied in life that kind of thing, but the maturity level from college to highschool is vastly diffrent. I say don't do it, but thats never stopped anyone before. 4 months from now i'll see a post about how it all went wrong

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jbrooks544

The only thing I would worry about is if you are breaking the law. What is the age of consent, etc. in your state. If her dad gets pissed at you can you be brought up on charges since you are over 18 and her under? Otherwise, 2 years, big whoop.

legolas

Na, one of my friends does that. I think it's alright, just a few years.

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amge

If she is mature for her age, then I think it might work. But I noticed when I was a freshman, I could not stand majority of the younger kids from my old high school. I knew a lot of them before I left for collage, but only remained friends with around 5 of them after words.

I messed around with several of the younger girls because I was a "college guy", but it was just for sex. No relationship thing.

analog

Yeah man, high school drama is fucking weak as shit. You wanna be out on a date and hear her drone on about how sally is getting fucked by 2 guys and they're fighting and jimmy stole johnny's backpack in the cafeteria and how jennifer gave head to some guy she doesn't know and now she has lockjaw...etc., etc. Just leave it be, find yourself a nice SMART, MATURE college girl.

emidew22

I agree with everyone else's reasons for why you shouldn't be with her, but i wanted to point out that if you did date her, she could base her choice of colleges on you, and if things don't work out between you two in the end that would really suck. And if she had you when she got there, she might not make many friends, cause she'd have you and wouldn't need them as much. So that's just one more on the list of reasons why you shouldn't be together. Having said that, if you feel like she's really something special, and not just some cute girl you have a few things in common with, then all these reasons are meaningless. Just don't end up spending all your free time with her and missing out on the "college experience"

anleja

"That's what I like about high school girls. I get older and they stay the same age."

Dilbert1234567

I don’t know it seems fine at first (I’m 18 and my gf is 15)

the only problem is the parents, you have to abide by there rules, she has to be home by a certain time etc. I’m hoping to earn their trust so that i can spend even more time with her. and if you truely love her, you can deal with the problems.

Basically you have to be careful, polite and a perfect gentleman.

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"Love is not finding the perfect person, but learning to see an imperfect person perfectly." -Sam Keen

World's King

I've been with more then my fair share of girls that by all definition were too young... I'm not saying like 12... They were all with in two or three years of me. When I was 16 I dated a 19yr old. They have stayed 19... I'm now 22. It's all well and good if you can make it work. 18 to 16 isn't bad at all... it's possible that the two of you could have been in high school together and then it wouldn't have been weird... I'm rambling here.

Sorry.

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wry1

I've always been a firm believer in regretting the things I've done, rather than the things I wished I'd done.

Go for it. You might regret it in the end (life has a way of doing that to folks), but then again.....

Jedbeck

My freshman year of college I was dating a high school sophomore. We were together for just under 2 years. We actually started dating when I was a senior and she was a freshman.

It's not creepy unless you allow it to be. You just have to remember sometimes these relationships will not last because one or both of you may be curious as to what it is like with other people. But then again some of these relationships do last forever.

Good luck.

InTeGrA77

i'ma girl...but i just thought that i would give you my imput as well.

if it makes you feel any better, my best friend is dating a guy thats 7 years older than her...so you have nothing to worry about with only 2 years!

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Woody182

I was a soph. in college and dated a junior in high school. I thought it was the greatest idea in the world and that she was just as mature as I was. Over time, I sort of grew up..we ended up breaking up and staying friends. Now I'm a senior and she's a freshmen at the same school. I feel like I'm 15 years older than she is at this point. I say if you think it feels right, go for it, but don't throw all your eggs into the basket.

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taliendo

age is a state of mind. If you two seem compatible, then I find no reason that you shouldn't give it a shot. hell, its only two years.

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brandon11983

I say, who gives a fuck about ages? If you two like each other and get along good, then I say go for it. My girlfriend from a few months ago was 15/16 (turned 16 maybe a month before we broke up). She was extremely mature for her age too, more so than others my age. We saw nothing wrong with the age difference, and both our parents were fine with it too. Do whatever the fuck makes you two happy.

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sigma1042

have her bring her friends to party with you on the weekend
you will be a god among men to your college friends

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ratbastid

"Now that I'm in college, I can do stuff I couldn't do back in High School. Like... date High School girls!"

james t kirk

And right now there are about a million horny 50 year old perverts saying, "ya boy, you date those college girls and leave sweet 16 to me!"

Jesus Pimp

Dude don't date high school chicks. When you're in college you should go after older girls.

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