how long should you wait?
 

how long should you wait before having sex with someone?

i'm not asking about how old you should be but how many times you've gone out with the person before you do the deed.

I've found that if i sleep with a girl on the first date i lose respect for her and most likely will never call her again, i dont feel bad in this situation becuase she probably had the same intentions as well.

so back to my question...how many dates before you add another notch on your headboard, and still have mutual respect for each other?

Re: how long should you wait?
 

In that case, you must not have any self respect, because she sure as hell wasn't the only one having sex.

Why the double standard?

Sure - there are such things as meaningless one-night stands, and if it was a mutually decided thing - that's okay. But what's wrong with first-date sex if you hit it off and both feel comfortable with each other?

Hell - I know I'm worth sleeping with on the first date!
(well - at least I <i>was</i> - back when I was single and dated ;) )

I know in half an hour of meeting someone if I will ever consider sleeping with them....therefore if he's up for it on the first date...IT'S ON!! lol

Wow only half an hour huh? ;)

Wait till you find someone you're in love with, it'll make it all the better plus you'll have something nice to remember in the future. Why don't you ask her when she'll be ready? I dunno why she wouldn't tell you.. Just say your interested?

Good luck.

My rule is the third or fourth date. Anything longer then that is a waste of your time and money, and don't let anybody tell you different ;)

i think the double standard thing is a good point, mabee you should learn to respect yourself before you pass judgemnt on others.

I found a month or so to work well if you want a balanced relationship, just make sure your both ready because if you really love and respect the other person you'll wait as long as it takes.

Kudos to yournamehere, for expressing my exact sentiments. I opened this thread only to close it after reading the opening post. I was disgusted, and didn't want to participate in a conversation about how many dates it takes for a guy to have respect for a girl - wtf? As you said, yes, there are such things as one night stands, but there are also people who just mesh and consider themselves ready to express it quickly. The idea of including respectability in sex is from the dark ages, my friend.

a week.

I think you should wait until you read this post.
And then use your judgment. If you think both of you are ok w/ doing the deed, then go for it. If not, wait.

People have *rules* for this shit? Man, like the relationships between men and women aren't complicated enough. I think that people should care about each other before they fuck. It's like in Clerks "If I like someone, I just go down on them. I only sleep with the ones that I love, and I love you, Dante."

So, the moral is, just go down on them :p

Jessica Simpson's boyfriend waited something like 4 years? maybe not quite that long. Anyways...if my wife looked like that I'd say it was worth the wait.