Promise rings - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

im2smrt4u · 08-30-2003, 01:35 PM

What do you think of the idea of a promise ring? Is it a stupid, rediculous idea, or a loving gesture of commitment?

ktthequeen · 08-30-2003, 01:45 PM

It seems very junior high-ish.

cheerios · 08-30-2003, 01:52 PM

i think they're cute, personally, but it doesnt matter what WE think, it matters what you and her think. :P

Quietus · 08-30-2003, 02:29 PM

My girlfriend and I are at colleges which are extremely far apart, and before we left for college, we exchanged "promise rings." I know for me at least, it serves as a constant reminder of her, and has a little extra meaning for me than if it were just a ring. Promise rings can be rediculous when they're exchanged between people who don't mean it or who just recently started dating, but they can also be very meaningful tokens of affection.

wry1 · 08-30-2003, 02:31 PM

You wanted the truth, right? Okay.....

I think that any ring signifying a promise to make another promise to make yet another vow is incredibly ridiculous.

There's no reason why you should go out and buy a ring to show that you plan to buy two more rings later on. Do something truly nice for this person instead. Take whatever money you were willing to spend on that promise ring and give her an evening she'll remember far more fondly.

But that's just my opinion....I could be wrong.

goof7ball · 08-30-2003, 02:51 PM

I think it depends on why you are giving it to her. If it is because you are trying to delay buying the real thing, then it sounds failrly lame. However, I like what somebody said else said about buying one while their sig. other was far away. Since you can't show each other your commitment everyday, then the ring is a good symbol.

BigDonkey2 · 08-30-2003, 04:06 PM

i think promise rings are fucking waste....my neighbor, who is 19, is dating the girl down the street, who is 16, and they both wear em. i think they are stupid as fuck. whats the sense in getting a promise ring? its like commiting yourself to a lesser form of marraige. i really dont see the point in them especially in younger couples. they always say "we'll be together forever" what a crock of shit. once the fork in the road comes one of you is going to have to make a decision on whether or not to stay together. just my $0.02. sorry for the rant

Slims · 08-30-2003, 04:36 PM

I think they are silly. If you both want to pledge to stay together forever, then get married, or engaged, which is a promise to get married.

bermuDa · 08-30-2003, 04:49 PM

a little of both, so i won't vote.

Fallon · 08-30-2003, 05:31 PM

If ya don't call them promise rings, they work for me. My fiancee got me a ring while she was at another school.
I can see the point to them because we only spent twenty bucks on the two of them. Good engagement rings are $100+. So price wise, they're better. Oh well though, it's a matter of opinion.

more fire · 08-30-2003, 07:21 PM

I think there stupid, personally.

siryn · 08-30-2003, 08:45 PM

Promise rings are one of those things that have just popped up lately. They remind me of Secretary's Day, and Grandparents Day: that is, they were created in order to further commercialism, in this case, sell rings. If a representation of commitment is important to someone, then that's cool by me, but personally, I don't choose to buy in.

punx1325 · 08-30-2003, 11:00 PM

I think its complete bull, but my mom was one of those religious people. Well, she got one for my sister, and 2 days later it broke. My mom thought it was some type of sign, and accused her of being a whore. Funny part is, my sister is an innocent girl. The idea of a promise ring is just a cheap knockoff of a wedding ring.

im2smrt4u · 08-30-2003, 11:15 PM

Thanks for all the tips everyone. I think I will invest my money in something else.

FYI, we are a young couple, both 18, almost 19.

tikki · 08-31-2003, 01:59 AM

Promise Rings: dumbest idea ever. You don't need a frigging ring to promise you will get engaged later. Just get engaged, or don't worry about it. simple as that.

World's King · 08-31-2003, 02:04 AM

I have a nice sized box of rings from random girls...

Screw 'em.

Spidey · 08-31-2003, 04:16 AM

Yet again it depends on your personality, if you both treasure these items then it will come to great effect, however if you use it as a way of getting into her pants then surely not.

JBX · 08-31-2003, 04:26 AM

Nope, not for me. It's like passing a note in gym class.

tikki · 08-31-2003, 10:29 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by JBX
Nope, not for me. It's like passing a note in gym class.

Except a lot more expensive

Exodus · 08-31-2003, 03:18 PM

to me a peice of metal isnt gonna make a difference if the other person isnt a faithful person. ive been there done that and to me its just a little silly... but thats just IMHO.

coke babies · 08-31-2003, 03:43 PM

Eh, it kind of strikes me as a junior year of high school type gesture, but if you really mean something with it, it could be a good thing.

"Broken Promise Ring" by the Ataris is good, though.

dannoxxxx · 08-31-2003, 03:56 PM

yeah, i wouldnt buy a ring for a girl and call it a promiose ring. but i have bought rings for girlfriends after i had dated them for a while and started to really like them.....as a show of affetion and appreciation for them being who they are...etc etc.

motdakasha · 08-31-2003, 05:27 PM

I don't like the idea of marking a person as your personal property or territory. I don't like the idea of jewelry (promise, engagement, wedding, necklace, whatever), visible hickeys, lipstick marks, PDA, etc. If you can't trust your S.O. to take responsibility in making it known when necessary that s/he's taken, then why are you dating her/him?

I think these are as tasteless as visible thongs.

SexyCat · 08-31-2003, 05:43 PM

I guess it all depends on what you are promising.

im2smrt4u · 08-31-2003, 11:18 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by motdakasha
I don't like the idea of marking a person as your personal property or territory. I don't like the idea of jewelry (promise, engagement, wedding, necklace, whatever), visible hickeys, lipstick marks, PDA, etc. If you can't trust your S.O. to take responsibility in making it known when necessary that s/he's taken, then why are you dating her/him? I think these are as tasteless as visible thongs.

Well, that wouldn't be the intent. She already wears some rings, but this would be from me, and have a special meaning, just to her.

soxsfans · 09-01-2003, 05:22 AM

They already have something like that, its call an engagement ring!

Cynthetiq · 09-08-2003, 10:42 AM

buy her some OTHER personal jewelry esp. since you mentioned that she's got other rings on... buy her a locket put your picture in it. buy her an id bracelet inscribe your name and some words on it....

but stay away from a promise ring...

Thraeryn · 09-08-2003, 11:13 AM

I'm miffed that I couldn't pick both options.

I think that anything you do to show your commitment to another person is sweet. I also have given a promise ring, been engaged, and been married, and I don't believe in any of them now.

The best advice: don't hesitate to jump in when you're unsure, but ALWAYS BE SURE before you find that you can't jump back out!

PredeconInferno · 09-08-2003, 03:29 PM

I have NEVER heard of a good instance with someone giving a promise ring.

STUPID idea, in my opinion.

Leviathan[NCV] · 09-08-2003, 03:53 PM

Get your name tattoo'd on her ass.

im just a girl · 09-08-2003, 05:29 PM

i think its stupid. what the fuck does it promise, anyway? its a waste of money. just screw and forgo the ring

thats better anyway

starbum · 09-08-2003, 06:42 PM

Cant afford engagement ring right now. college life. I like the promice rings we have because because it shows we're almost ready for the commitment of marriage without perposing it yet. when its affordable and viable to get married, we'll move onto engagement. But the $20 ring showing that we're almost to that stage is meaningful and special to me and her. I see alot of negativity towards it...sure, it can be immature, but anything can be immature to its use. If you really have meaning, emotion, and love behind the gesture then I say do it. I just cant afford a engagment ring so this is a good placeholder. (im working on it, jobs are hard to come by)

so overall, engagment has a hefty pricetag. I heard some comments like "why promice engagment when you can just skip that and get engaged" or stuff of the sort...just remember, there's a price to that...and you cant just go "Here, I want to marry you." and hand her a $50 engagement ring. It HAS to be special. just my .02

StormBerlin · 09-08-2003, 09:42 PM

I myself have a promise ring. I got it for Christmas a couple years ago and it is a beautiful token of love. I'll move it to my other hand when I get engaged. It's just kind of like a prequel... in myopinion.

GrayWolf · 09-08-2003, 09:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by cheerios
i think they're cute, personally, but it doesnt matter what WE think, it matters what you and her think. :P

BINGO.

legolas · 09-09-2003, 08:37 AM

I've really only heard of them on TV and stuff. I don't think I'd ever give my girl a ring unless I'm proposing. It makes it more special.

skysooner · 09-09-2003, 09:18 AM

If your relationship needs a promise ring to survive, it isn't a strong enough relationship imho. When it is right to get engaged you will know it. I completely loved my wife when we were dating, but I moved away from college to start work for another company. We had talked marriage, but it wasn't until I couldn't see her every day that I realized I couldn't live without her. That's when we bought the engagement ring.

Holo · 09-09-2003, 12:01 PM

Relationships aren't gonna be airtight with rings..that's for plumbing

It realy depends on what you both want...if you like it and makes you absent heart fonder go fo it. I wouldn't waste $ on it personally but I'm not you.

analog · 09-10-2003, 12:17 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by motdakasha
I don't like the idea of marking a person as your personal property or territory... ~~ ...If you can't trust your S.O. to take responsibility in making it known when necessary that s/he's taken, then why are you dating her/him?

I actually kind of take pride when I'm wearing a hickey or other similar badge, and when I'm married to her, I'll feel even more proud to wear the ring. I'm not ashamed of loving her, I'm proud to have her and happy to display it. Call it ownership if you like, but I personally like being considered "someone's".

Like when a guy or girl gets married and has that ring on, some other person- maybe a random, total stranger- will look and say, "they're special to someone. They're someone's special love." and that's a very cool thing.

As for the ring itself, I think it's nice as a gesture only (not used to get a bad relationship back off the ground), definitely more of a "younger" thing, and it's power is derived from the person it's given to.

Thraeryn · 09-10-2003, 12:26 AM

That reminds me, sometime when we get some more cash, I gotta see if Jinya can put some semi-meaningless jewelry on my fingers! I like jewelry.

Captain Canada · 09-11-2003, 01:59 PM

I dont see any problem with promise rings. My girlfriend and I exchanged them before I left for college. Its a constant reminder of her being there, waiting for me to come home when I can.

View Poll Results: What do you think of promise rings?
They are stupid and rediculous	48	69.57%
They are a loving sign of commitment	21	30.43%
Voters: 69. You may not vote on this poll

08-30-2003, 01:35 PM	#1 (permalink)
im2smrt4u Beer Aficionado Location: Rancho Cucamonga, CA	Promise rings What do you think of the idea of a promise ring? Is it a stupid, rediculous idea, or a loving gesture of commitment?

08-30-2003, 02:29 PM	#4 (permalink)
Quietus Tilted Location: Tempe, AZ	My girlfriend and I are at colleges which are extremely far apart, and before we left for college, we exchanged "promise rings." I know for me at least, it serves as a constant reminder of her, and has a little extra meaning for me than if it were just a ring. Promise rings can be rediculous when they're exchanged between people who don't mean it or who just recently started dating, but they can also be very meaningful tokens of affection. __________________ "And I think it’s gonna be a long long time 'Till touchdown brings me 'round again to find I’m not the man they think I am at home Oh, no, no, no, I’m a rocket man, Rocket man, burning out his fuse up here alone..."

08-30-2003, 04:36 PM	#8 (permalink)
Slims Eccentric insomniac Location: North Carolina	I think they are silly. If you both want to pledge to stay together forever, then get married, or engaged, which is a promise to get married. __________________ "Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery." - Winston Churchill "All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act out their dream with open eyes, to make it possible." Seven Pillars of Wisdom, T.E. Lawrence

08-30-2003, 04:49 PM	#9 (permalink)
bermuDa don't ignore this--> Location: CA	a little of both, so i won't vote. __________________ I am the very model of a moderator gentleman.

08-30-2003, 01:45 PM	#2 (permalink)
ktthequeen Insane Location: Earth	It seems very junior high-ish.

08-30-2003, 01:52 PM	#3 (permalink)
cheerios Banned Location: 'bout 2 feet from my iMac	i think they're cute, personally, but it doesnt matter what WE think, it matters what you and her think. :P

08-30-2003, 02:31 PM	#5 (permalink)
wry1 Loser Location: Far too far from my Angel....	You wanted the truth, right? Okay..... I think that any ring signifying a promise to make another promise to make yet another vow is incredibly ridiculous. There's no reason why you should go out and buy a ring to show that you plan to buy two more rings later on. Do something truly nice for this person instead. Take whatever money you were willing to spend on that promise ring and give her an evening she'll remember far more fondly. But that's just my opinion....I could be wrong.

08-30-2003, 02:51 PM	#6 (permalink)
goof7ball Tilted	I think it depends on why you are giving it to her. If it is because you are trying to delay buying the real thing, then it sounds failrly lame. However, I like what somebody said else said about buying one while their sig. other was far away. Since you can't show each other your commitment everyday, then the ring is a good symbol.

08-30-2003, 04:06 PM	#7 (permalink)
BigDonkey2 Insane Location: California	i think promise rings are fucking waste....my neighbor, who is 19, is dating the girl down the street, who is 16, and they both wear em. i think they are stupid as fuck. whats the sense in getting a promise ring? its like commiting yourself to a lesser form of marraige. i really dont see the point in them especially in younger couples. they always say "we'll be together forever" what a crock of shit. once the fork in the road comes one of you is going to have to make a decision on whether or not to stay together. just my $0.02. sorry for the rant

08-30-2003, 05:31 PM	#10 (permalink)
Fallon Junkie Location: RI	If ya don't call them promise rings, they work for me. My fiancee got me a ring while she was at another school. I can see the point to them because we only spent twenty bucks on the two of them. Good engagement rings are $100+. So price wise, they're better. Oh well though, it's a matter of opinion.

08-30-2003, 07:21 PM	#11 (permalink)
more fire Psycho Location: London	I think there stupid, personally.

08-30-2003, 08:45 PM	#12 (permalink)
siryn Tilted Location: Long Beach CA	Promise rings are one of those things that have just popped up lately. They remind me of Secretary's Day, and Grandparents Day: that is, they were created in order to further commercialism, in this case, sell rings. If a representation of commitment is important to someone, then that's cool by me, but personally, I don't choose to buy in.

08-30-2003, 11:00 PM	#13 (permalink)
punx1325 Junkie Location: San Diego	I think its complete bull, but my mom was one of those religious people. Well, she got one for my sister, and 2 days later it broke. My mom thought it was some type of sign, and accused her of being a whore. Funny part is, my sister is an innocent girl. The idea of a promise ring is just a cheap knockoff of a wedding ring. __________________ If something seems too good to be true, then it probably is....

08-30-2003, 11:15 PM	#14 (permalink)
im2smrt4u Beer Aficionado Location: Rancho Cucamonga, CA	Thanks for all the tips everyone. I think I will invest my money in something else. FYI, we are a young couple, both 18, almost 19. __________________ Starkizzer Fan Club - President & Founder

09-08-2003, 10:42 AM	#27 (permalink)
Cynthetiq Tilted Cat Head Administrator Location: Manhattan, NY	buy her some OTHER personal jewelry esp. since you mentioned that she's got other rings on... buy her a locket put your picture in it. buy her an id bracelet inscribe your name and some words on it.... but stay away from a promise ring... __________________ I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not. What's the best nation in the world? DO-NATION!

08-31-2003, 01:59 AM	#15 (permalink)
tikki Justified Location: West Lafayette, IN	Promise Rings: dumbest idea ever. You don't need a frigging ring to promise you will get engaged later. Just get engaged, or don't worry about it. simple as that. __________________ Take notice. Take interest. Take me with you.

08-31-2003, 02:04 AM	#16 (permalink)
World's King Here Location: Denver City Denver	I have a nice sized box of rings from random girls... Screw 'em. __________________ heavy is the head that wears the crown

08-31-2003, 04:16 AM	#17 (permalink)
Spidey Crazy Location: Wellington, New Zealand	Yet again it depends on your personality, if you both treasure these items then it will come to great effect, however if you use it as a way of getting into her pants then surely not.

08-31-2003, 04:26 AM	#18 (permalink)
JBX Unfair and Imbalanced Location: Upstate, NY	Nope, not for me. It's like passing a note in gym class. __________________ "Youth and Strength is no match for Age and Treachery"

08-31-2003, 03:18 PM	#20 (permalink)
Exodus Psycho	to me a peice of metal isnt gonna make a difference if the other person isnt a faithful person. ive been there done that and to me its just a little silly... but thats just IMHO.

08-31-2003, 03:43 PM	#21 (permalink)
coke babies Crazy	Eh, it kind of strikes me as a junior year of high school type gesture, but if you really mean something with it, it could be a good thing. "Broken Promise Ring" by the Ataris is good, though.

08-31-2003, 03:56 PM	#22 (permalink)
dannoxxxx Insane Location: Toronto	yeah, i wouldnt buy a ring for a girl and call it a promiose ring. but i have bought rings for girlfriends after i had dated them for a while and started to really like them.....as a show of affetion and appreciation for them being who they are...etc etc.

08-31-2003, 05:27 PM	#23 (permalink)
motdakasha Hiya Puddin'! Miss me? Location: Silicon Valley, CA	I don't like the idea of marking a person as your personal property or territory. I don't like the idea of jewelry (promise, engagement, wedding, necklace, whatever), visible hickeys, lipstick marks, PDA, etc. If you can't trust your S.O. to take responsibility in making it known when necessary that s/he's taken, then why are you dating her/him? I think these are as tasteless as visible thongs. __________________ =^-^= motdakasha =^-^= Just Google It. BA Psychology & Photography (I'm not going psychoanalyze you nor will I let you cry on my shoulder. Have a nice day.)

08-31-2003, 05:43 PM	#24 (permalink)
SexyCat Meow Location: Michigan	I guess it all depends on what you are promising.

09-01-2003, 05:22 AM	#26 (permalink)
soxsfans Junkie	They already have something like that, its call an engagement ring!

09-08-2003, 11:13 AM	#28 (permalink)
Thraeryn Loser	I'm miffed that I couldn't pick both options. I think that anything you do to show your commitment to another person is sweet. I also have given a promise ring, been engaged, and been married, and I don't believe in any of them now. The best advice: don't hesitate to jump in when you're unsure, but ALWAYS BE SURE before you find that you can't jump back out!

09-08-2003, 03:29 PM	#29 (permalink)
PredeconInferno Reclusiarch Location: Unfortunately Houston, TX	I have NEVER heard of a good instance with someone giving a promise ring. STUPID idea, in my opinion. __________________ Samurai in Training Knowledge is power. Guard it well.

09-08-2003, 03:53 PM	#30 (permalink)
Leviathan[NCV] Well... Location: afk	Get your name tattoo'd on her ass.

09-08-2003, 05:29 PM	#31 (permalink)
im just a girl Upright	i think its stupid. what the fuck does it promise, anyway? its a waste of money. just screw and forgo the ring thats better anyway

09-08-2003, 06:42 PM	#32 (permalink)
starbum Tilted	Cant afford engagement ring right now. college life. I like the promice rings we have because because it shows we're almost ready for the commitment of marriage without perposing it yet. when its affordable and viable to get married, we'll move onto engagement. But the $20 ring showing that we're almost to that stage is meaningful and special to me and her. I see alot of negativity towards it...sure, it can be immature, but anything can be immature to its use. If you really have meaning, emotion, and love behind the gesture then I say do it. I just cant afford a engagment ring so this is a good placeholder. (im working on it, jobs are hard to come by) so overall, engagment has a hefty pricetag. I heard some comments like "why promice engagment when you can just skip that and get engaged" or stuff of the sort...just remember, there's a price to that...and you cant just go "Here, I want to marry you." and hand her a $50 engagement ring. It HAS to be special. just my .02 Last edited by starbum; 09-08-2003 at 06:45 PM..

09-08-2003, 09:42 PM	#33 (permalink)
StormBerlin Happy as a hippo Location: Southern California	I myself have a promise ring. I got it for Christmas a couple years ago and it is a beautiful token of love. I'll move it to my other hand when I get engaged. It's just kind of like a prequel... in myopinion. __________________ "if anal sex could get a girl pregnant i'd be tits deep in child support" Arcane

09-09-2003, 08:37 AM	#35 (permalink)
legolas shit faced cockmaster Location: CT	I've really only heard of them on TV and stuff. I don't think I'd ever give my girl a ring unless I'm proposing. It makes it more special. __________________ "To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems."

09-09-2003, 09:18 AM	#36 (permalink)
skysooner Registered User Location: Oklahoma	If your relationship needs a promise ring to survive, it isn't a strong enough relationship imho. When it is right to get engaged you will know it. I completely loved my wife when we were dating, but I moved away from college to start work for another company. We had talked marriage, but it wasn't until I couldn't see her every day that I realized I couldn't live without her. That's when we bought the engagement ring.

09-09-2003, 12:01 PM	#37 (permalink)
Holo A Real American	Relationships aren't gonna be airtight with rings..that's for plumbing It realy depends on what you both want...if you like it and makes you absent heart fonder go fo it. I wouldn't waste $ on it personally but I'm not you. __________________ I happen to like the words "fuck", "cock", "pussy", "tits", "cunt", "twat", "shit" and even "bitch". As long as I am not using them to describe you, don't go telling me whether or not I can/should use them...that is, if you want me to continue refraining from using them to describe you. ~Prince

09-10-2003, 12:26 AM	#39 (permalink)
Thraeryn Loser	That reminds me, sometime when we get some more cash, I gotta see if Jinya can put some semi-meaningless jewelry on my fingers! I like jewelry.