dirty talk. funny ones, really good ones that got you aroused, and anything else
 

:thumbsup:

.....so -mia, what ones got YOU aroused?
Best if the thread author starts with an experience or example.
Yup - (this is how we roll)

Don't have anything from my personal experience to contribute at present, but probably the funniest lines from Nick & Noras Infinite Playlist were from the couple getting it on in the back of his car...

"I love you so much it's retarded... You smell so good, you smell like soap."

"I like the way you taste."

On a first date: "I appreciate the thought; but I'm not really in the mood for a fancy restaurant. How about we fuck now and just go to Burger King later?"

"Let's go."

:eek: you're going to put all THAT in there?

"I don't care, I'm going to sleep anyway."

"Fine, just don't tell anyone. NO ONE."

"Hey, if I passout after drinking tonight, feel free to still fuck me.... Don't worry most of the time it will wake me up."

"Don't worry, my husband is in jail for a LOOOOONG time. He won't be showing up anytime soon."

"Stop laughing, you shouldn't laugh when you are inside of me... I don't care how funny it is that I'm fucking you, STOP IT."

Geez, if this was a contest LordEden wins hands down!!!

You are a funny dude and I love your posts!!! / Still laughing outloud.... !!WOW!

After the second hook-up with this girl we're lying in bed. She turns to me and says:

"I hope you're not looking for a relationship. All I want is no strings and a good dick, and you have a great one."

All I could stammer out was, "I can do that".

In my life, the men who said this always got special treatment. It's always a turn on to know that you taste good! And when your man says so, that's especially titillating and a great turn. Then you're ready to do the wild stuff because he appreciates the "wild honey."

"101 Things Not To Say During Sex"

101 things not to say during sex

"Wow, I'd thought you would be as small as you are short."

"Wait, you wanted to get off too?" (Said by her, not me)

[Friend comes into the room during sex and starts talking to the girl]
"No, No, don't stop. She will eventually leave the room after she finishes her drink."

"I can't believe my bf hasn't noticed how loose I am, you are a lot bigger than he is."

*****

Cinn says I'm allowed to post things I've said with her (or said by her) in bed. This one is one of my favorites. I'll post more when I think of them.

"My nose is NOT an approved orifice!"

haha ok then
so i have this guys cock in my mouth and i really enjoy giving blowjobs. i didnt want to come up for air and eventually i had to. all i could think about was how
i wish i didn't have to breathe. so i told him that and he had a big grin on his face
it got me really aroused to for some reason

Man, I fucking snorted. I've actually used one similar to Ms. Cinna, there.


I personally like "Now."

Last night's was pretty great, too....

Me: "Close the door, hey, close the..."
S: "No, NOW."

Works every time.

You have no idea how much this reminds me of losing my V card!