met another couple... safe sex - STD testing?
 

My wife and I met another couple while on vacation and we all hit it off sexually.

We both were intamate with the other's spouse and did not use condoms (both men are sterile).

Now back at home we question our moral decision to not have "safer sex" with the couple.... We are going to visit them in a 2 months and we will of course have some wild times again.

Is it the time to ask them to take STD testing and the same for us so that we can all be sure we are disease free?

We have not been with anyone else for over 10 years.... but the other couple are members of a swing club although they tell us that they "don't do much there".

How does one bring up this subject to someone.... aren't you saying to them "that you want to make sure you are not going to give me a disease?"

Thanks...

Gosh, I love your lifestyle, It's the stuff I can only dream of.

So while I'm still dreaming of mine, the answer is yes, it is time. Go ahead and ask them if they're "safe". Yes, you are saying to them, "I dont wanna get a disease!!"

As to how to bring up the conversation, I've not been the most tactful person.

Even they test and you test and all disease free..... no one knows what future holds. You should definitely switch to safe sex from next time!

Perhaps something tactful & direct.

"We had blast with you guys, and we're really looking forward to getting together with you again. There's something that we need to discuss, and we're not sure how to say it, so here goes--how do you feel about STD testing?"

If you didn't catch 'something extra' during your last encounter, I doubt you are likely to catch something during your next.

reallyyy????

you saying that people always catch diseases the first time round?

my advice..wait 3 months and get a STD test done on yourselves. dont take your lives for granted.

and anyone who tells you that they are part of a swingers club and 'dont do much' is full of it. so i would take their word about being disease free with a grain of salt

Seconded. You're playing with fire, here... your encounter would be no different than having a one-night stand with someone you had just met, when you were single... would you have been any less careful, then? Personally, if they are responsible swingers, they ought to be totally comfortable and used to being asked about STD checks and the like... I mean, that just seems like obvious common sense to me. I find it strange that they did not ask you about STD's in the first place... I don't know if I would meet up with them if all 4 of you did not agree that it was a priority to get tested and discuss the results before anything further went on.

My two cents. I'm not a risk-taker when it comes to my body... there's too many things that could go wrong and severely impact my quality of life, just because of a careless romp or two.

Show them YOUR clean bill of health first (the letter you got from the doctor) and tell them you got yourself tested out of respect for them to make sure you wouldn't pass anything on to them. Hopefully they will then volunteer to test themselves but if they don't volunteer, you can just ask them to do the same for you. Set the good example.

While I agree with the others that tact is needed, and safe sex should ALWAYS be practiced, I DO take offense to your comment. just because someone is a MEMBER of a swing club, does not mean that they are constantly having wild sex with people al the time. When I was with my last SO, we were frequent visitors to a local club that we loved, yet we RARELY coupled up with others.

Somewhere on another message board the other couple has started the exact same thread. Just talk to them about it.

It's no good taking risks with your health. I think you should get yourselves tested, even if you have no symptoms, for your own peace of mind. Then make it a rule to only engage in safe sex.

The hooking up seems hot -- but being uptight about asking about STD's and a clean
bill of health ?

If person "A" has sex w/ 100 other people,
and then has sex with person "B",
EVERYONE DOES realize that the person "B" has the
EXACT same possibility of acquiring each disease from all 100 other people -
via their only one sexual contact with Person "A" - ?

Don't You ?
Hello - AIDS ?
Epidemic,
Pandemic -

DC - no offense meant, but if it anything like the OP has said it is, and the swinging couple have had ANY action whatsoever (when they said they dont do much - i can only assume they do a bit) then my comment stands.

per contact transmission rates are not 100 percent, and therefore your statement is not correct.