Baz

My wife and I decided that we're interested in trying some anal play, but neither of us have ever done anything of the sort, and we don't even know where to begin. I've searched the forum on "anal" and gotten quite a few tips regarding lube, etc., but nothing on position.

Sooo, what position is good for learning? Should we even be starting with proper intercourse, or would it be better to start out with fingers or toys? Any tips are appreciated.

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- Baz

MSD

Finger first, then small toys, then penis. Go slow, use twice as much lube as you need, and lie on your sides so you have more control over the depth of penetration.

soma

all you need is a bit of lube and a running start.

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Plan9

Position = spooning. Let her do the moving.

Dude, you're not breaching a castle! (could end this with a clever rhyme, though)

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Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

PonyPotato

blah

Tophat665

.(book) Very very good for this sort of thing.

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Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns.
Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

Craven Morehead

Icy Hot.....ummmmm, probably not.

have fun

World's King

Ball gag and some lube.


It doesn't really matter who wears the ball gag.

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heavy is the head that wears the crown

Plan9

Okay... I'll bite. Why would the person giving the wang also be wearing the gag?

...

Oh, it's late.

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

World's King

You're not doing it right.

__________________
heavy is the head that wears the crown

Plan9

HAHAHAH!

Hell, I've always felt like that, brother... but ya know what?

I keep on going!

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

Baz

Wow, that was quick response time! Thanks, everybody, though I might take soma's advice a little carefully

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- Baz

awanderingsoul

Spooning would be a good start; letting her be on top would also work well. The best advice I can give is lots of lube (as already mentioned), and tell her to "bear down" while you are trying to enter her.

Tophat665

The real trick is for the person who is catching, I assume her, to get control of their sphincters; there are two to worry about. Until she does that, it will hurt a bit no matter how much lube. Most of the advice has been to go easy at first, building the size of insertion, and that's the retail method of giving her control of the sphincters unconsciously. If she were to actually work by herself or with your help to get conscious control over them (the outer one is easy, the inner a bitch) then 1) She'll enjoy it a lot more, 2) You won't have to use so much lube, 3) you won't have so much prep time, and 4) she'll never have problems with hemorrhoids or constipation.

Shoot for no pain ever.

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Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns.
Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

Kaimi

Lay her on her back and press her legs to her chest. Standing you could have good access to stimulate her as well. Also, for the first time I would recommend a enema or anal douche a couple hours prior. It would be awful to build it up have the night come and end up stimulating a bowel movement. Leaving her horribly embarrassed(having no control over the situation) and refusing to try it again.

Sultana

I recommend against the douching/enemas. That can actually make things bad.

As far as positions go, I find the most "comfortable" is me on my back and him sideways behind me (of course, where else would he be?). But yes, first of all start with fingers (nails very short and filed, pls) and assorted small toys. Work your way up (no pun intended).


I always wonder how it works out for two people new at it. Good Luck there!

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"Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath.
At night, the ice weasels come." -

Matt Groening

My goal? To fulfill my potential.

Plan9

Hot Tip:

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

Acetylene

Give her a massage and an orgasm first and she will have no trouble relaxing.

LUBE LUBE LUBE LUBE

Eros is the best brand ever, by FAR, and I have tried, like, all of them. It's worth the money: it stays where you put it and it never dries out or needs reapplication (which is gross). Just don't put it on toys since it is silicone-based and will ruin silicone toys.

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There's no justice. There's just us.

RolandGilead

Maybe try doing her from behind (vaginal) and start massaging her anus with your finger. Don't insert it yet, she should tell you when she's ready...

Mantus

Her, on her back would be the most relaxing for her. Doggy style also works.

Just get the tip of your penis in and no more. From here it's important for you to NOT THRUST. Allow her to control the penetration. Once she is comfortable and feels good about the sensation try some strokes of your own. If she still feels good take over the reigns and fuck her silly.

PS. NEVER GO FROM BROWN TO PINK.

abaya

I've always liked it from behind (while laying on my stomach on the bed), after a half bottle of wine and an orgasm, some rimming and finger-play to warm up the area. Spooning is also a good way to go, I think.

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And think not you can direct the course of Love;
for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
--Khalil Gibran

ENolaReve

Heh. Great tip Crompsin.

bobby

from behind in the shower....w/lube.....!!!

xoxoxoo

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"Life goes on,within you,and...with out you !" xoxoxoo

kel

I have to agree with Acetylene here. Eros is key. Sphincter control is next and to avoid learning bad habits you need to go slow. If you have to apply more force to get it to go in then you are doing it wrong. Focus on aim and angle and then apply a small amount of steady pressure. What you want to avoid is overpowering the sphincter quickly. The tip of the penis does not taper along with the shaft so it feels uncomfortable on the sphincter if you pull out too far while thrusting. Once you are in it is mostly a function of how much and what quality lube you have.

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"It better be funny"

Kaimi

When I hear the comments about massive amounts of lube it cracks me up. I always think of the story on tuckermax.com "Tucker tries buttsex; hilarity does not ensue." I don't wish to paste the entire story in there(it is incredibly long), but there is a lesson to be learned about using too much lube. Just imagine a large amount to be equal to an enema. You get the idea.

Barstool

Why the hell would you *NOT* douche first? The LAST thing I want is shit dick....

mixedmedia

If the woman has regular bowel movements, there's no reason for an enema. But if you're going to get icked out over a little poo then you might want to forego anal sex altogether.

I have found lying flat on my stomach to be the most comfortable position whether it's the first time, or the first time in a long while.

Classic missionary style is just plain hot because you can look at each other...nize!

Doggie-style is, of course, the raunchiest...therefore, the most fun.

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PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce

Shaindra

Get her a small dildo and let her experiment a bit before trying with the real thing.

And just remember, porn movies are not instructional videos on this sort of thing.

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"Never regret something that once made you smile."

Tophat665

A person who has 1) been eating right and 2) figured out how to relax both sphincters of their anus should be able to assure that they have no significant amount of poop in the chute. The rectum is not normally used for long term poop storage. That said, if they're not getting enough fiber then an enema and a brief shower with a small buttplug deployed to make sure that everything has come out might be in order.

Not that you'd get shitdick anyway. You are wrapping that rascal, nu?

__________________
Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns.
Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

Ishmal

Massage is recommended!
But it depends on your partner for the orgasm.
My ex would be up for almost anything until she had her orgasm, then she just got sleepy.

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Willravel

An anal massage?

Plan9

The kind they offer in prison, huh?

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

Ishmal

You mean this story???

Tucker Max

__________________
"Despite the high cost of living, it remains popular."

Willravel

I don't think penis in anus would be considered a massage.

Ishmal

Anal acupuncture maybe???

__________________
"Despite the high cost of living, it remains popular."

Plan9

In this case, the part getting inserted would be benefiting from the massage action.

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

doncalypso

Although the stereotypical image of anal sex consists of the receptive partner receiving the dick in the doggie-style position I've heard that missionary is actually better because it allows for face-to-face contact and allows the woman to stimulate her clitoris while being penetrated.

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Doncalypso... the one and only Haitian Sensation

blahblah454

While doing it doggy style the man can also play with her clit if she just wanted to hold on for dear life with both hands.

Bees

We like missionary position best especially with me standing on the floor and with my girl's butt right up to the edge of the bed with her legs raised up.

My girl likes to be double penetrated whenever possible and this position allows me to finger her pussy while I fully penetrate her ass. On top of all that she likes to rub her clit to bring on the fireworks.

From this position I also get a good view of the action.

We've never needed lube just a little saliva and finger to get things started.

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reesespiecespbc

You're going to want to start with laying on your sides. The first 5-6 times, he needs to understand that you are going to be in COMPLETE control. He needs to take cues from you and only do what you want.

Take it slow and use toys on yourself a day or 2 before you have anal, to loosen things up a bit.

Once you get oveer the initial uncomfortable phase and enjoy it....you're gonna go WILD. Nothing beats anal....I SWEAR!