The Ladder Theory
 

I did a search and couldn't find a ref... so I'll post it.

The Ladder Theory

Oh, this makes me happy. :thumbsup: Goes along well with Henry Rollins' Mekanik.

I think that ladder theory applies to a subset of humanity, and i don't mind saying that i wouldn't want to be romantically involved with any of those people. But if your goal is fucking shallow people from the club scene, by all means, watch out for the sti's though.

^That is 100000000% true >_>

That's almost word for word what went through my mind when I read this.

As in "Wow, a social model for the shallow people I meet in clubs. This is why they act like fucking morons!"

this is why I hate dating.

and upon discussing this with women that I know. all I gotta say is wow, it's fucking true.

so uh... I guess I should go get a real job or settle for my palm, cuz I think im an alright looking guy with a good personality, I just suck with money.

This has been discussed pretty in depth here before, I'm a pretty firm believer in the theory on an extremely large scale of the population, but as with all theories, there are exceptions.

if you actually look at the theory, most will find the same conclusion.

Of course, the women around here won't see it that way I assure you :)

uh yeah, you're right, I don't see it that way, because I am not that way and I have the relationships to prove it

Try being and dating, oh, I don't know...adults, for a change. Now that's a novel concept, isn't it?

and you misspelled insensitive in your title...

Hear, hear, MM.

Yeah, I love how these guys keep whining about how girls won't go out with them, but then we get threads upon threads by the same guys talking about their wives and girlfriends....

DAMN RIGHT!

[QUOTE:]Says: I want a man who is motivated and has goals.
Means: I want a rich man

Says: I want a man who knows how to treat a woman.
Means: I want a rich man

Says: He's from a really good family.
Means: He's from a really rich family.[/QUOTE]

what we really mean is we don't want men who sit on their asses and do jack shit all day and expect the dough/food/luxury of having a roof over your head to just be provided by the WOMAN!

we want a man who is not going to get drunk and beat us, throw us around, cheat on us. we want a man who is not going to be insensitive. we want a caring man who will love us for who we are and in turn we will love them just the same despite the amount of money they earn, despite their family being rich....treat us right does not mean buy us stuff.

we want a man with a family who will accept us and even that isn't as important just as long as the man accepts us. rich family my ASS!!!

who the fuck cares about a rich family. if your family is rich...good for them.well done to them for making it happen for themselves and maybe grab some of their initiative to make it happen for ourselves.

if i want to be rich...i'll get rich on my own thank you kindly.

and MM is so completely on the button...try being and dating adults for a change...i think you might find it a breath of fresh air. WOMEN who actually don't give a damn about all this shite.

dont put me in a box. thank you very much.

try it...i dare ya...you'll thank me :thumbsup:

yeah, cause you know only rich handsome men get married :rolleyes:

what they really mean, is, 'wah! I can't have my pick!'

The thing I've found about pigeon-holing people is that it's impossible. No one ever completely conforms to the norm. Behaviors change. People learn better and more effective social skills.

It was an amusing read, though. It reminds me of a younger Jazz with too much time on his hands and experimenting with celebacy as a training technique to improve his 5k times.

and that's just it Jazzy...you get some men who actually don't find it amusing, they find it absolutely true. and that pisses me the hell off!

fine, i'll admit...some parts were funny and that actually warranted a smile which i gave...

but then you have people who actually believe that ALL women are that way.

Heh.

On a larger scale, any time anyone says "ALL (insert descriptive noun here) are (insert adjective here)", they've mispoken. It really doesn't matter if the subject of the sentence is "women", "men", "Arabs", "rich" or "Radiohead fans". Within that subset are sure to be exceptions to whatever rule is being constructed.

Women find confident good looking rich males attractive :eek:

I for one am shocked!

Seriously its a silly theory that seems to be based more around bitterness.

Most of these things tend to 'work' often because the guys who rely on them are completely incompetent around women so any change is positive.

:lol: So true, so true... :)

This is one of those things that all guys know are true and all women deny.

No, this is one of those things that some guys wish was true for all guys and all women. T'aint.

I think most people appreciate self confidence, beyond that, if you have to diagram out all your relationships into different zones based on whether you can put your penis somewhere, you're over thinking things.

Ladder theory is very popular among certain circles, especially those that can be defined by the "intellectual whore" and "cuddle bitch" terms. I mean why wouldn't it be? You take a bunch of guys who aren't getting laid and tell them that it isn't their fault. The reason they aren't getting any is that all women are shallow/lying bitches and the men they are sleeping with are dirtbag/rich assholes.

You're a nice, gentlemenly fellow and it's not your fault; it's the system and you're just a victim.

Says the insurance man. :rolleyes:

Ah, the beauty of self-reinforcing beliefs. Let us know how your relationships work out in a few years, eh?

And this is the sort of thing that all people say who don't really have anything productive to say. :rolleyes:

wah. :p

Nice point. Insurance, though, is about taking known behaviors, assigning a risk factor to them, then gambling that those factors will hold true about the individual. After all, not all teenage boys will get in car wrecks. If they did, they'd be uninsurable. Since they don't but still get in proportionally more, they pay a higher price for the coverage since they represent a higher risk.

I think that my theory still fits with the realities of my life. I like to think so, anyway.

*Crompsin dons his new t-shirt*

I <3 Generalizations

Always? :D

It makes sense to me, but I'm a social scientist. I think there's a big fat line between making generalizations/stereotypes based on a few anecdotal experiences, and actually looking at statistically robust, scientifically-sound evidence of a normal curve of human behavior. The first makes for novels and self-help books, the second makes for studies that can be applied to the real world and to (hopefully) effect real behavior change. And, apparently, insurance policies. :)

would this be a bad time to mention that my band only rides motorcycles, we're all filthy rich, and the biggest bunch of assholes any of you has ever met?

ladies???

This is the typical "battle of the sexes" zero-sum competitive crap that a certain segment of the population buys into because they believe that it is more important to win than be happy. It is also the same pseudo-sociological crap that gives the humanities field a bad name. As several respondents have already mentioned, there is a shallow portion of the population who seems to be more than happy to use "tools" to increase their sociability, rather than being genuine and authentic. This is often somewhat effective because there is a corresponding portion of the opposite sex (whichever one) who is also playing the "game." Often as people become more mature they find that they do not want the same things that they did when they were younger (i.e. someone who is "rich" or beautiful or whatever) and seek a partner with attributes that go beyond physical characteristics or bank statements. Some people never mature. It should also be noted that there is a big difference in people who want actual relationships, versus people who just want to date and screw. I personally prefer the depth and intimacy of a relationship.

Hey! You with the finger! No advertising!

...

(posts pictures of himself sitting on his shiny chrome Shadow Sabre with a fat wad of $100s tucked in his waistband, smoking a Cuban cigar and punching a nun)

Hey no fair....you know we all love you for your piggy style. ;)

Sure thing! Make sure you do the same :D

Right or wrong, society likes systems. We like building walls, closing doors, pushing buttons.

I like examining them. The grand Us vs. Them mentality always rocks my socks.

Humans are naturally hierarchy prone. We have to have status and "enemies."

...

Oh, we've all got assholes... why isn't that enough to aid in complete social unity?

I know :P

Seriously, though, these types are arguments usually go nowhere. Why? Because women, in general, no matter how wrong they are or how much evidence proves otherwise, will always believe that they do no wrong or they're 'above the curve', so to speak. So ummm... Yeah. You can think you're right, and I'll do the manly thing and let you think you're right :D

Chances are that if you don't agree with the ladder theory on some level you're either:

1.) A woman or
2.) One of those asshole guys which women are always attracted to.

:)

I'm happily married, hon... have been for a while, and plan to be for a long time into the future. I'll certainly let TFP know if that changes, but I can assure you, the health of our marriage has jack shit to do with the ladder theory. :)

HAHAHA...

"1.) A woman."

Damn, man... I should buy you a drink.

...

*phone rings* Captain Obvious called... he wants his job back.

Really...? I had NO idea...

I never said that women do no wrong.

My point has been that the guys who believe this theory are immature and are only going after immature women. And, I strongly suspect, the problem isn't that girls won't go out with them, it's that the girls they want to go out with won't go out with them. It is truly a self-fulfilling prophecy, but you want to blame it on all women. It's fucking ridiculous.

And, personally, I think if you believe something like the ladder theory you'll never get anywhere in a relationship because you'll continually throw the baby out with the bathwater with your closed-minded assumptions.

If this is what you truly believe then enjoy your life alone. It's hardly any woman's responsibility to disprove your stupid convictions about who she is. *shrug*

Assuming that that's true, the inverse of it is that if you believe in ladder theory you are an unattractive man. Maybe if you worked on your unattractiveness, instead of blaming women for not being attracted to you, you wouldn't need a formal theory to vindicate your for you inability to be attractive. :)

A good friend pointed me towards it years ago, and I have since had it bookmarked on every computer I've ever owned....At first I thought it was a nasty joke by some cynical bastard....but I've since accepted it as truth.

-Will