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Old 06-01-2007, 01:22 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Tightest vag ever

Story - I've been with this girl for about 3 months, we haven't had sex yet but we've done hands, and oral, etc.. She is a virgin, I am not. I've had 2 other partners, they were both virgins as well.

Anyway, This girl is so tight, I can use one finger on her pretty easily, but when I use 2 fingers it is painful for her, she likes the pain a little, she gets off really quick like this.

The thing is 2 fingers is no where near the size of a erect cock...


I really think its gonna tear the fuck out of her, I mean... I'm not naive enough to not understand, its supposed to be pretty tight, I understand that, but to be honest, there is no fucking way my shits gonna fit without some 'serious' tearing involved.

her cherry is popped, so that isn't the problem either.

I know the problem is she is a tiny girl, and obviously everything is proportionate.



I'm not really sure what to do here, there is no way I'm gonna get in there even with a whole bottle of KY without her fainting.
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Old 06-01-2007, 03:09 AM   #2 (permalink)
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She may have a medical issue - some women truly cannot, without therapy, unclench themselves, as it were, no matter how much lube and foreplay you use.

If one finger is painful while she is lubricated, this might be the issue.
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Old 06-01-2007, 04:17 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Ladies and gentlemen, it's time to LEARN!

Firstly, let's do away with the concept that a girl is "tight" or "loose" because we have to realize that women are meant to bear children, who are much much thicker than your (and, yes, even my) dick. Their vagina can expand to fit its contents, it all depends on whether the woman is willing to do it or not. A woman clenching up to prevent penetration is very rarely considered a medical condition... in fact it's quite normal.

She doesn't need therapy, she needs foreplay. She doesn't need muscle relaxants, she needs comfort. She's a virgin; she is facing the great unknown and she more than likely (in this country) had a childhood filled with authorities instilling the fear of sex in her. Not only that, she's got her boyfriend who is more experienced than her and she thinks he's going to judge her if she's not a good fuck.

What I'm trying to say is the reason for this girl being "too tight" to penetrate is something you have to work with. It's not something you just throw a bottle of lube at. You have to develop some maturity and realize your role in this situation. You cant chalk it up to therapy or anatomy. You have to put in some quality time making your girl feel right.
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Old 06-01-2007, 04:31 AM   #4 (permalink)
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But 2 fingers have more of an oval shape. The penis is more like a circle. Maybe it is the larger diameter of the oval that is causing problems? I am just assuming that the 2 fingers are wider than the penis diameter.
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Old 06-01-2007, 05:13 AM   #5 (permalink)
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While Hal's right in general, there are specific cases where the vaginal opening is simply too small. It's a genetic abnormality, and it's relatively rare. I think he's right in this case, but I do want to point out the exception to the rule. I'm "intimately" familiar with it since I have a former girlfriend with the condition, and I had to go meet with her doctor when we started talking about sex so that we could figure out what would and wouldn't work.

One other thing - it's entirely possible that consciously she wants to have sex but unconsciously she doesn't. I've been in that situation too, and it was very frustrating for both of us.

Take things very slow. It might help to bring her to orgasm manually before attempting intercourse (it was one of the recommendations from the doctor). If she can have multiple orgasms, even better. As we all know, there's nothing like a good orgasm to relieve stress.
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Old 06-01-2007, 04:32 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bajingo
Story - I've been with this girl for about 3 months, we haven't had sex yet but we've done hands, and oral, etc.. She is a virgin, I am not. I've had 2 other partners, they were both virgins as well.

Anyway, This girl is so tight, I can use one finger on her pretty easily, but when I use 2 fingers it is painful for her, she likes the pain a little, she gets off really quick like this.

The thing is 2 fingers is no where near the size of a erect cock...


I really think its gonna tear the fuck out of her, I mean... I'm not naive enough to not understand, its supposed to be pretty tight, I understand that, but to be honest, there is no fucking way my shits gonna fit without some 'serious' tearing involved.

her cherry is popped, so that isn't the problem either.

I know the problem is she is a tiny girl, and obviously everything is proportionate.



I'm not really sure what to do here, there is no way I'm gonna get in there even with a whole bottle of KY without her fainting.
Being a 'tiny girl' has nothing to do with it. So, big girls have caverns? No...
Halx is basically right as is The Jazz...she is probably clamping shut out of fear and/or nerves. If she was truly ok with it all and ready, she'd be self-lubed and inviting.
'Cherry popped' has nothing to do with it either-I popped on a bicycle handle; it has nothing to do with allowing (and that's what it all is) a penis to be there.
Don't be pushy, first off. Let her call the shots and get rid of her anxiety when she's ready. Intercourse is a huge deal; even some of us more experienced practitioners have to be totally into the idea of having it, willing to give it and receive it, otherwise it's a lesson in futility for all involved.
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Old 06-01-2007, 04:37 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Halx
Firstly, let's do away with the concept that a girl is "tight" or "loose" because we have to realize that women are meant to bear children, who are much much thicker than your (and, yes, even my) dick.
THANK YOU. I don't believe how often I have to remind people that babies squeeze through there. A penis that has a 1-3" inch diameter isn't going to do shit compared to the 6" head of a baby. While the RARE genetic abnormality may change that, odds are that this is a case involving a lack of experience.
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Old 06-01-2007, 04:49 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ngdawg
Being a 'tiny girl' has nothing to do with it. So, big girls have caverns? No...
Agreed.
In fact the converse almost seems to be true. The women I've encountered that seemed to have the most problems with size were around 5'5" to 5'7" in height. (The "problems" arose because I'm a thick 8" ... and I'm Chinese - so let's sink another myth) In fact the 4'11" tall and 5'2" tall ex-gfs had no problems whatsoever.

It's a funny thing about genitalia - I'm a doctor and the smallest penises I've seen belonged to some of the tallest, bulkiest men. (Maybe that explains Dudley Moore with Susan Anton).

But she probably has a condition called, vaginismus. Google it and you'll see.
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Old 06-01-2007, 05:06 PM   #9 (permalink)
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I'm generally against diagnosing problems like vaginismus across the internet. The most likely explanation for all of this is anxiety and anxiety alone.
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Old 06-01-2007, 05:11 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Old 06-01-2007, 05:25 PM   #11 (permalink)
 
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I agree with the general sentiment about the girl's (possible) subconscious, or even conscious, explanations for her clamped vagina.

However, the statement, "Hey, a baby can fit, why not my penis?" neglects the fact that a baby doesn't just pop out of a normal ol' vagina. The symphysis pubis (cartilage separating two parts of the pelvis, directly in front of the vagina) expands a great deal thanks to pregnancy hormones, in order to fit the baby's head through there. If this physiological change did not take place, there is no way that a baby's head would fit. Now, I know that is more of a structural thing than a tissue thing, but still... babies don't just fly out of vaginas without a lot of stuff happening first.

Just wanted to add that semi-non-relevant fact to the discussion.
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Old 06-01-2007, 05:34 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Halx
I'm generally against diagnosing problems like vaginismus across the internet. The most likely explanation for all of this is anxiety and anxiety alone.
yeah, i usually don't like to diagnose this on the internet either. I much prefer to do it in person! kidding, kidding. Several people, esp. Hal have come through with excellent advice. Take it easy, let things happen naturally. i assure you, at some point she will be ready.
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Old 06-01-2007, 07:12 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Halx
I'm generally against diagnosing problems like vaginismus across the internet. The most likely explanation for all of this is anxiety and anxiety alone.
What you've described is, by definition, vaginismus.
I encountered this with one ex-gf. Hers was so severe that penetration was impossible - like trying to penetrate a closed fist.
If you read up on it you'll understand that vaginismus is a physiologic manifestation directly linked with anxiety.

The cycle of vaginismus:


http://www.vaginismus.com/vaginismus-causes/

Trust me.
I'm a doctor.
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Last edited by longbough; 06-01-2007 at 07:16 PM..
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Old 06-01-2007, 07:41 PM   #14 (permalink)
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I thought you drove an ambulance....
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Old 06-01-2007, 07:56 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by willravel
I thought you drove an ambulance....
Where the heck did you get that idea?

I'm a physician of internal medicine.
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Old 06-01-2007, 08:11 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by longbough
Where the heck did you get that idea?

I'm a physician of internal medicine.
Honestly, I have no idea where I got that idea from. My bad.

So you're a bit of a diagnostician, then, right? The 'I've got a non-surgical solution' guy. Very, very cool. I'm still thinking about going into medicine (cardiology).

Do you carry a gun in with your patients?
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Old 06-01-2007, 09:28 PM   #17 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by willravel
I'm still thinking about going into medicine (cardiology).
It's a looong road, son. How badly do you want to study cardiology?

I was going to do cardiology myself but I just got too tired of residency and fellowship and just wanted to work. I had worked in heart-lung perfusion research while taking my pre-med and had references from one of the top 10 cardiothoracic surgeons in the country. A friend of the family used to be one of the directors of the American Heart Association and he taught me all I know about EKG interpretation and his brand of cardiac auscultation. Even so, it was a tough, looooong road.

Have you taken your MCAT yet? If you live in California your grades and scores need to be top tier in order to stay in the state. You'll likely have to move for schooling and again for residency. Does your wife work, too? I hope she can work out of the house. Especially if you have a child your relationship with your family will be taxed to its limits because you'll never be around and you'll be stressed from studies all the time. I've seen the tightest marriages get close to divorce because of medical school and its demands.

Then there's residency - Imagine some months with 80-90 hour work weeks with chronic sleep deprivation. On top of that you need to study for the three US Medical Licensing Exams. After that there's the Board Exams - the toughest 2 day exam you'll ever face in your life.

Presuming you pass you then apply for fellowship. Time to uproot the family again ... and so it goes.

If you want it badly then it's something you have to fight for NOW and aggressively. If you're "thinking" about it then it will never happen - and don't even try because a half-attempt just makes you a med-school dropout with no job skills and a mountain of new debt.


Quote:
Originally Posted by willravel
Do you carry a gun in with your patients?
no.
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Old 06-01-2007, 11:02 PM   #18 (permalink)
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To most women, I've found that foreplay does not start when you hit the sack, it's an all day thing.

Help her cook, help her clean up after a meal, help her with the laundry, take her for a walk and hold her hand. Whisper sweet nothings in her ear. Maybe bring her a bouqet of wild flowers. Be a friend of hers before you expect her to be your lover.

Take a day to do these things and I can predict with almost absolute certainty that things in bed that night will go much smoother.
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Old 06-01-2007, 11:31 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by longbough
It's a looong road, son. How badly do you want to study cardiology?

I was going to do cardiology myself but I just got too tired of residency and fellowship and just wanted to work. I had worked in heart-lung perfusion research while taking my pre-med and had references from one of the top 10 cardiothoracic surgeons in the country. A friend of the family used to be one of the directors of the American Heart Association and he taught me all I know about EKG interpretation and his brand of cardiac auscultation. Even so, it was a tough, looooong road.

Have you taken your MCAT yet? If you live in California your grades and scores need to be top tier in order to stay in the state. You'll likely have to move for schooling and again for residency. Does your wife work, too? I hope she can work out of the house. Especially if you have a child your relationship with your family will be taxed to its limits because you'll never be around and you'll be stressed from studies all the time. I've seen the tightest marriages get close to divorce because of medical school and its demands.

Then there's residency - Imagine some months with 80-90 hour work weeks with chronic sleep deprivation. On top of that you need to study for the three US Medical Licensing Exams. After that there's the Board Exams - the toughest 2 day exam you'll ever face in your life.

Presuming you pass you then apply for fellowship. Time to uproot the family again ... and so it goes.

If you want it badly then it's something you have to fight for NOW and aggressively. If you're "thinking" about it then it will never happen - and don't even try because a half-attempt just makes you a med-school dropout with no job skills and a mountain of new debt.


no.

I just don't know how you people get into health, as doctors or nurses. It's horrific.

My Country's health system is on the verge of collapse, and my mother works as a psych nurse, it's heart breaking what it puts people through. As a doctor you work this job that requires you to be A1 fucking smart, costs the earth in education, and then as thanks puts you through living hell to gain anything resembling a career.

Anyone who works in health, especially in America, my hat goes off to you.
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Old 06-02-2007, 02:50 AM   #20 (permalink)
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I think mastubation helps. I know if I've gone through a dry spell, well hell, even if I haven't been playing with my toys in awhile, things feel a little tighter than usual, but once I get going, everything gets back to normal. It could just be the muscles are tighter than usual from not being relaxed in awhile if that makes sense. Maybe if she started playing with dildo's that have a range of sizes to work up to something comfortable. It's a win win situation! And she'll learn more about what pleasures her
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Old 06-02-2007, 10:34 AM   #21 (permalink)
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So I've only had 1 partner and she was not a virgin.

My friend tells me that virgins feel really good cuz they are so tight.. is that true?? He said "its like a vice on your penis"

So umm yeah.. is it really that good a feeling or is my friend just exaggerating ?
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Old 06-02-2007, 10:50 AM   #22 (permalink)
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Just fuck her till she bleeds...




What? Someone had to say it.
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Old 06-02-2007, 11:33 AM   #23 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by match000
So I've only had 1 partner and she was not a virgin.

My friend tells me that virgins feel really good cuz they are so tight.. is that true?? He said "its like a vice on your penis"

So umm yeah.. is it really that good a feeling or is my friend just exaggerating ?
A virgin is no 'tighter' than anyone else, technically speaking, unless that anyone else had a few kids naturally....the extreme tightness is from anxiety.
I could get into bragging, but I won't
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Old 06-02-2007, 03:41 PM   #24 (permalink)
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Quote:
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A virgin is no 'tighter' than anyone else, technically speaking, unless that anyone else had a few kids naturally....the extreme tightness is from anxiety.
I could get into bragging, but I won't
Really?! I see.. so how 'loose' or 'tight' a girl is doesn't really change much?
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Old 06-02-2007, 04:06 PM   #25 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by match000
Really?! I see.. so how 'loose' or 'tight' a girl is doesn't really change much?

For the most part...


But after years of getting fisted and shoving large objects up there, I'm sure some pornstars aren't as 'petite' as they use to be.
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Old 06-02-2007, 09:34 PM   #26 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by match000
Really?! I see.. so how 'loose' or 'tight' a girl is doesn't really change much?
Nope...except for constant childbirth, which can stretch and tear the muscle fibers, size doesn't change much at all. And, if she knows what she's doing, even that won't matter. A vagina is a muscle and can voluntarily contract. It ain't the size, it's the grip
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Old 06-03-2007, 01:30 AM   #27 (permalink)
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Quote:
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Nope...except for constant childbirth, which can stretch and tear the muscle fibers, size doesn't change much at all. And, if she knows what she's doing, even that won't matter. A vagina is a muscle and can voluntarily contract. It ain't the size, it's the grip
So I asked my buddy who is a first year med student.. he told me that "sure, it can get loose.. its a muscle, and so why can't the muscle fibres relax and get more flexible and loose over time, just like any other muscle?" And then he pointed out that, for example, older women are looser (of course he's guessing he doesn't have this experience)...
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Old 06-03-2007, 05:08 AM   #28 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by match000
So I asked my buddy who is a first year med student.. he told me that "sure, it can get loose.. its a muscle, and so why can't the muscle fibres relax and get more flexible and loose over time, just like any other muscle?" And then he pointed out that, for example, older women are looser (of course he's guessing he doesn't have this experience)...
I'm a doctor and your friend is incorrect. Muscles don't "get loose" over time - By that rationale bodybuilders ought to be soft and limber. Connective tissue stretches and gets more flexible, but muscle can be exercised (e.g. kegel exercises) to hypertrophy and tighten.
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Last edited by longbough; 06-03-2007 at 05:10 AM..
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Old 06-03-2007, 05:08 AM   #29 (permalink)
 
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You want it guaranteed tight?

Go for anal.
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Old 06-03-2007, 05:13 AM   #30 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by abaya
You want it guaranteed tight?

Go for anal.
Soooo.... what are you doing tonight?
Can I buy you dinner?
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Old 06-03-2007, 06:07 AM   #31 (permalink)
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There's a lot of advice for him, but I would like to echo the advice for her: she needs to be playing with her own action, both to learn what she likes so she can share with her partner, and to calm the hell down about sex and things in the vag.
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Old 06-03-2007, 10:33 AM   #32 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by longbough
Soooo.... what are you doing tonight?
Can I buy you dinner?
Well I was gonna cook dinner for her and myself. Unless I'm invited too?
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Old 06-03-2007, 10:48 AM   #33 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by longbough
I'm a doctor and your friend is incorrect. Muscles don't "get loose" over time - By that rationale bodybuilders ought to be soft and limber. Connective tissue stretches and gets more flexible, but muscle can be exercised (e.g. kegel exercises) to hypertrophy and tighten.
So I guess since the vagina doesn't get "tighter", by inference from what you said, there is little to no connective tissue down there?


So if a virgin is not any tighter, what explains the bleeding that occurs?!
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Old 06-03-2007, 11:00 AM   #34 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by match000
So if a virgin is not any tighter, what explains the bleeding that occurs?!
Regardless of whether virgins are tighter or not, the bleeding is from the breaking of the hymen, not from the tightness. Bleeding from tightness would mean that the vagina is getting tears from the stretching... Now THAT would be bad.
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Old 06-03-2007, 11:01 AM   #35 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by match000
So if a virgin is not any tighter, what explains the bleeding that occurs?!
Bleeding is usually caused by:

1) The breaking of the hymen.
2) The girl being too nervous/anxious, and/or the guy being too rough.
3) Having an infection (e.g. yeast) that causes tears in the vaginal walls/tissues.

EDIT: My astute husband knows his junk... and mine as well.
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Last edited by abaya; 06-03-2007 at 11:05 AM..
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Old 06-03-2007, 11:05 AM   #36 (permalink)
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So if it is torn from streching or being too rough.. does that make it permanently less tight?
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Old 06-03-2007, 11:13 AM   #37 (permalink)
 
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Okay... dude, why are you so concerned with the "tightness" factor?

If you're so concerned about feeling a "vice on your dick," as you mentioned previously, then head down to the hardware store and have yourself some fun.

But for the love of god, please stay away from virgins until you grow up a little more and stop caring how good your dick might feel while you rip someone's hymen apart for the first time.

EDIT: Btw, did you actually read what Longbough wrote above? Kegel exercises, hmm?
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Old 06-03-2007, 11:37 AM   #38 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by abaya
Okay... dude, why are you so concerned with the "tightness" factor?

If you're so concerned about feeling a "vice on your dick," as you mentioned previously, then head down to the hardware store and have yourself some fun.

But for the love of god, please stay away from virgins until you grow up a little more and stop caring how good your dick might feel while you rip someone's hymen apart for the first time.

EDIT: Btw, did you actually read what Longbough wrote above? Kegel exercises, hmm?
lol chill. sheesh

no, i dont know what kegel are
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Old 06-03-2007, 11:49 AM   #39 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by match000
So I guess since the vagina doesn't get "tighter", by inference from what you said, there is little to no connective tissue down there?
*sigh* this reminds me of those discussions where heterosexuals explain how homosexuality is a pure choice.
The vagina is a muscular organ - Ask your med student friend for a copy of Netter's Human Anatomy if you want to understand this concept.

Next time you are intimate with your girlfriend - pause for a second and ask her to give you a couple of good kegel squeezes so you can see for yourself. My gf's vaginal muscles are well developed (no, she doesn't have a big, muscular crotch) which was a delight to discover and made sex that much more fun.

Quote:
Originally Posted by match000
So if a virgin is not any tighter, what explains the bleeding that occurs?!
I hope your "first year med student" friend didn't leave you with that rationale. Haven't you ever heard of a hymen?
Quote:
Originally Posted by match000
no, i dont know what kegel are
Do you know what Google is?
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Old 06-03-2007, 11:55 AM   #40 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by longbough
I hope your "first year med student" friend didn't leave you with that rationale. Haven't you ever heard of a hymen?
Do you know what Google is?
Lol, Good ol' wiki: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kegel_exercise

Yeah, i have heard of a hymen but i've only ever had 1 sexual partner and she wasnt a virgin. So i am super inexperienced regarding these things.
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