mixedmedia

Granted.

Things progress by people talking about them.

And I'm not getting pissy at anyone about a fucking word.

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Most people go through life dreading they'll have a traumatic experience. Freaks were born with their trauma. They've already passed their test in life. They're aristocrats. - Diane Arbus
PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce

abaya

How about a single standard? In my opinion, at some point, both men and women can sleep around too much for their own good. I hold no double standard to that effect... equal-opportunity judgment.

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elydian

I don't think there's anything wrong with the word, in a general sense. I think it being attached to women is a thing of the past. I hear it used evenly between the sexes (maybe a British thing?)

I never use it in a derogatory sense, as I don't feel it's derogatory in this day and age. If you want to screw around, good for you, male or female.

I think when you say that men laugh it off when they're called one, that's merely because of the old notion of men sleeping around being "cool", and women sleeping around being "not cool". That's a taboo of society that is finally beginning to die a deserved death. I look forward to the day that men and women alike can be sluts and proud, and also, not be sluts and be proud, whatever floats their boat.

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Now watch this drive.

pig

see, this is just fucking not right. it used to be that i could sit around, drink beer and whiskey, piss on the floor, break shit and then force conjugal relations on my wife, and it was just called 'friday.' now you're telling me i can't call you a slut? where does the madness end?

women's suffrage...they almost got that right.



one of these days....one of these days...

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blade02

My theory on why the term and the double standard. Whether its society's fault, nature's fault, or whatever... some men feel like sleeping with a woman is an accomplishment. The harder you had to work for it, the bigger your accomplishment. Now if all of the sudden, there is a woman that you slept with, thats letting everyone sleep with her, your accomplishment isn't so great anymore. And if you feel like you put more work into than the others had to, you feel cheated. Hence the negative attitude towards the "easy" woman.

Is this attitude right? I'd say not. But it does explain the ideas behind the term.

mixedmedia

Oh, yes...let the suffrage begin.




slut

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Most people go through life dreading they'll have a traumatic experience. Freaks were born with their trauma. They've already passed their test in life. They're aristocrats. - Diane Arbus
PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce

Nimetic

I guess it implies an indiscriminate woman (sex-wise). At the same time, guys are expected to be fairly indistriminate - taking anything that's on offer.

In terms of the word, I never use it. Also - I've never thought that a guy who's "had" a lot of women is necessarily manly. In fact, I'd probably look down on them if these were public relationships, or if they are discussed publicly (or occur within) a social group. Private encounters I see of as different and ok.

shesus

I'm in the camp of: It's only offensive if you take offense to it. I'm not saying that I go around calling people sluts, but it does happen. I agree that it has a negative connotation. However, no one can control what others say. They can only control how they react to it. If someone is so sensitive about a word then maybe it is hitting close to home and they are stuggling with the issues themselves. For example, if a woman is upset about being called a slut, maybe she feels that she possibly is one according to society standards. I don't know what the magic number is. Actually, I don't think there is one. I think that people just set their own numbers and use that as the judgment for everyone.

Anyway, if we didn't have the word slut, I wouldn't have one of my favorite songs which I was listening to today in fact. Howlin' Maggie: I'm a Slut. I always loved shouting out that song at their concerts...and I did at the last 3 we went to. I died laughing when people who didn't know it was a title of one of their songs gave me a sideways glance. Guess they thought I wanted in the singer's pants or something.

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Judy Taber

True, but how much more offensive a word can a lady be called? I sure can't think of one off the top of my head.

Willravel

I don't use the nigger word, the bitch word, the slut word or the cunt word. I don't kiss and tell or spit in public. I always use deodorant and my feet never stink. I say 'please' and 'thank you' whenever it's appropriate. I smile and make eye contact when I give a firm handshake. I open doors and pull out chairs.

It's about acting like an adult. Adults don't really use language like 'slut' because most adults understand that being sexually active, so long as one isn't a nymphomaniac, is not only normal but common. Adults know how to treat people with respect.

Judy Taber

James couldn't have said it any better, could he?

Willravel

Thanks!

Bond...James Bond

mixedmedia

I've said about five times now on this thread that it's not the word, it's the intent. If you use the word slut as a means of inserting your moral superiority or finer character over a woman then there's not much question of how that person should react to it. The same way one might react if they are unfairly called a liar. To place the burden of "dealing with it" on the accused is typical.

I've no doubt that there have been times in my life when the "societal standards" would consider me to be a slut. Ironically, the only time I was ever actually called a slut, I wasn't acting like one, lol. But luckily for me, I've pretty much been an active observer and critic of the hypocrisy of "societal standards" since about the time I first entered jr. high school and saw them in action. Particularly in regards to the expectations of women's behavior and in the veritably brutal way these expectations are perpetuated by women themselves.

So calling me a slut doesn't hurt me, in fact, sometimes I enjoy it very, very much. But that doesn't absolve someone who looks down on me or any other woman for being promiscuous or kinky or dressed provocatively from being an asshole. Nor does it disguise the fact that they react that way because they are quite threatened by it.

__________________
Most people go through life dreading they'll have a traumatic experience. Freaks were born with their trauma. They've already passed their test in life. They're aristocrats. - Diane Arbus
PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce

shesus

That's a personal opinion, but I think cunt is worse.

MM: You seem to be trying to prove a point. I get that it's not the word. However, you seem to be trying to make it very clear that you don't care. Who are you trying to prove it to?

It sounds like you do care what people think. This is normal. Society is riddled with a guilt complex...especially around sex. I'm working with a friend of mine right now who is feeling a lot of self-hate towards himself for his sexual choices. It is sad that people have trouble being themselves because they take what other people think and say too seriously.

So, we're going to counter-attack with the word asshole? This is why the issue will never be resolved. People who truly don't care just shrug their shoulders and move on. Those who take offense take part in a name-calling war that never ends.

I'm so tired of the 'their just jealous' or as you put threatened stance as the main reason. My mom fed me that when I was little and I called bullshit. I still do usually. Some do pick on people because they are jealous, but it's not the only reason. Some pick on others to make themselves feel superior. And then there are those who just pick on everyone for the fun of seeing the reactions.

I will agree on making a personal moral call. But everyone is a judge of something. If you don't judge the morals, you judge the people who are making moral judgments. We are critical creatures by nature.

As I said before we can't control what others say, but we can control our reactions. Why let the namecallers of America who don't know me from Eve make me miserable? I know who I am and I'm happy with it. If everyone could accept their choices and be happy with who they are the connotations wouldn't bother them either. Too many people are out to prove that they are a certain way to people who don't matter to them. I have yet to understand why.

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Whatever did happen to your soul?
I heard you sold it

Choose Heaven for the weather and Hell for the company

mixedmedia

It's more the intolerance I have for intolerance. It runs through most of my strongest opinions, especially regarding the way people behave with each other. I am aware that that makes me somewhat of an asshole, too. I am well aware of the hypocrisy and it bothers me, too. I am far from perfect, but I'm pretty sure that behind all the pretention and insufferability, that my ideas are right.

__________________
Most people go through life dreading they'll have a traumatic experience. Freaks were born with their trauma. They've already passed their test in life. They're aristocrats. - Diane Arbus
PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce

shesus

*applause*
If I ever make it down to Florida, I'm buying you a beer my friend. This is one of the most refreshing sentences I have read. This is why I like having discussions with you.

OK, return to the regularly scheduled slut talk...

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Whatever did happen to your soul?
I heard you sold it

Choose Heaven for the weather and Hell for the company

Halx

Any of you sluts feel like making it to NY?

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mixedmedia

Ditto.

Last time I checked there was no lack of sluts in NY.

But that said, I would love to make it in NY.

__________________
Most people go through life dreading they'll have a traumatic experience. Freaks were born with their trauma. They've already passed their test in life. They're aristocrats. - Diane Arbus
PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce

Sultana

Make it *in* NY, eh?

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At night, the ice weasels come." -

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My goal? To fulfill my potential.

Glory's Sun

That's funny.. I hear adults using "Bitch", "Slut" "Cunt" all the time. I don't see how using a grouping of words makes one person less adult than another. Perhaps it makes them their own person who doesn't feel like they have to cater to society's dillusion of moral.

Sure I can treat people with respect, and I do, however if I choose to call you a stupid Bitch Slut with a dirty Cunt.. I haven't lost any maturity.. it's just my reaction to you. People will call people what they will and will continue to do so. So to say that adults don't really use words like "slut, bitch, cunt, nigger etc" is pretty bold on your part and perhaps you need to spend some time outside of your own protected world.

mixedmedia

you did mean this to be funny, didn't you?

__________________
Most people go through life dreading they'll have a traumatic experience. Freaks were born with their trauma. They've already passed their test in life. They're aristocrats. - Diane Arbus
PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce

Ourcrazymodern?

Would it offend anybody if I characterized myself as a slut?

"I just fucking love people"

People are so queer.

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BE JUST AND FEAR NOT

RenaissanceII

I am with mixedmedia on this one... Words and phrases that one would not use in normal daily communications, provided the SO(s) are comfortable with their use, and the context in which they are used (not in anger, fer instance), should be okay.

Of course this requires more Communication...

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And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
Anais Nin


I Wish You Well.

Willravel

Can we add NSFW to the title because of the imagery?

Thank you very much! People might owe you their jobs!

mixedmedia

Done.

__________________
Most people go through life dreading they'll have a traumatic experience. Freaks were born with their trauma. They've already passed their test in life. They're aristocrats. - Diane Arbus
PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce

pig

by the way babe, fantastic pic. and for you, i just might let you get away with it.

god, i'm such a slut

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You don't love me, you just love my piggy style

mixedmedia

and for you, precious pigglet, I just might get into it

gawd, I'm such an irrepressible slut.

__________________
Most people go through life dreading they'll have a traumatic experience. Freaks were born with their trauma. They've already passed their test in life. They're aristocrats. - Diane Arbus
PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce

pig

Puh Puh Puh Pleaaaasseeee mixed

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You don't love me, you just love my piggy style

tenniels

I wish the word wasn't used so liberally. Like everyone is getting called a slut. Girls that are virgins get called sluts, which totally bugs me, as does using any word outside of it's meaning. I think that guys can be sluts too, and I find that more recently I am hearing it used to describe guys and girls more equally.

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Philangicality

In general, a sucessful man, in the eyes of other men, uses his sexuality to fuck as many women as possible in his life, and a sucessful woman, in the eyes of other women, is one who fucks one man and conrolls him with her sexuallity. It is healthy to be somewhere in between, but it is more fun to be on the ends.

IT2002

Do you know what Tulsa is backwards?

A slut



Do you know what a slut is backwards?

50 bucks.


I'm sorry, I couldn't stop myself.

But really, I don't advocate the banning of words. If you ban one derogatory word, you have to ban them all. As Mixed has said, we can object to the intent behind how a word is used.

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It doesn't even feel like whatever time it is.

vanblah

A quick glance at the OED says that the word first appeared around 1402:

A "slattern" means basically the same thing.

I hope that this has helped clear things up ... or not.

Ourcrazymodern?

slut has one syllable
and fits poorly in haikus
though nicely elsewhere.

Hell, we might all be sluts if we thought about it.

no, I didn't edit this twice. Yes, I did.

Give a slut a break.

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BE JUST AND FEAR NOT

KungFuGuy

People use words like fuck,bitch,cunt, and slut in anger situations much like Gorillas holler scream and beat the ground before a confrontation.

I found it interesting that you mentioned "society's dillusion of moral", because while the wording was awkward, I think I agree with you.

Harsh language is really just a way for people to vent, much like gorillas and their beating the ground and their chest. Society just kind of makes people deny their inner animal instincts with a layer of "nice-ness" and "morals" on top of tens of thousands of years of instinct.

You know how a male gorilla will chase around a female gorilla in season to mate, even if she's not all that into it? There's a reason why rough sex is so much fun. It's awesome if both partners are into it. I see nothing wrong with using slut or cunt in the bedroom.

I haven't really thought out the rest of this, I just get tired of people hiding their animalistic instincts through things like chivalry, morals, and polite society. It's one thing to be polite and well mannered, it's another to deny yourself for the sake being those.