New to Sex but can't unload - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

match000 · 03-23-2007, 10:05 AM

Hey guys

Yesterday night was my first time ever having sex, and it was with my (new) girlfriend..

She's only had sex with 1 other guy before, and probably not many times since she didn't know what to do.

My problem is I know roughly what to do (from watching porn / reading forums like this), and I can keep my hard-on, but I can't actually get off inside her or even when she gives me a BJ. I even tried hand-jobbing myself in front of her, and I got soft and couldn't get off..!

I felt bad and said its cuz I was nervous and my first time.. but what gives??

Any tips or advice?

Thanks!!

Glory's Sun · 03-23-2007, 10:12 AM

What's wrong?? Nothing. You were nervous. It happens to guys all the time.

You say she doesn't know what to do. How do you know that?? If she isn't doing it the way you like it then you need to tell her how you like it. The same goes for her.

One more piece of advice... porn really doesn't teach you a whole lot. Pick up a book such as Super Hot Sex by Tracey Cox or something similar to really get a grasp on the mental side and fun bits.

So just relax and explore together.. you'll get your nut soon enough.

oFia · 03-23-2007, 10:17 AM

Sex isn't about performing and doing it right. It's about having fun.

I'd second the book by Tracey Cox - if it's what I'm thinking of. You should even be able to find it in a regular book store.

JStrider · 03-23-2007, 10:55 AM

yah... dont expect it to be like porn...

and as for cumming on the first time... I dont think I came untill my 4 or 5 time...

just relax, do what feels good, talk to each other about what feels good during and after. dont worry about the difficulty you had this time... worrying too much will make the next time harder.

oh and don't forget. USE PROTECTION!

absorbentishe · 03-23-2007, 10:58 AM

You had performance anxiety, that's all. No big deal, just work through it.

analog · 03-23-2007, 11:07 AM

You were nervous. Nerves can kill an erection faster than Bea Arthur. Don't sweat it, just keep calm and enjoy, it'll happen.

Ourcrazymodern? · 03-23-2007, 04:23 PM

The little head's connected to the big head. Relax & feel good about it.

MEAD · 03-23-2007, 04:26 PM

Nerves, man.
Happened to me my first (and second) time. Pretty common, really. It takes time to really get comfortable/ in the moment. Also the condom we were using was one of those extended pleasure ones (super thick and has some sorta numbing liquid) so make sure you are using the right condom for you too.

Julius · 03-24-2007, 03:40 PM

The first (and second and third and fourth) time I had sex nothing happened, but then suddenly BOOM! and then it was on... No worries dude. It'll come (pun partially intended :P)

World's King · 03-24-2007, 03:49 PM

Really...? I came twice my first time.

I guess I'm the weird one.

pig · 03-24-2007, 03:50 PM

well match, the problem is that your junk is broke.

seriously, i dated a girl a while back who was hot and who knew exactly what she was doing. for whatever reason, it took a while until i actually lost my froth, so to speak. when things chill out, all will be well. trust me: her special purpose is made to work with your special purpose. with time and practice, the magic will reveal itself.

go forth and multiply.

match000 · 03-27-2007, 09:47 PM

ahh cool. thanks for the tips everyone

been a lil busy as u can see, but no, i dont mean sex, i mean the other relationship stuff

03-23-2007, 10:05 AM	#1 (permalink)
match000 Psycho	New to Sex but can't unload Hey guys Yesterday night was my first time ever having sex, and it was with my (new) girlfriend.. She's only had sex with 1 other guy before, and probably not many times since she didn't know what to do. My problem is I know roughly what to do (from watching porn / reading forums like this), and I can keep my hard-on, but I can't actually get off inside her or even when she gives me a BJ. I even tried hand-jobbing myself in front of her, and I got soft and couldn't get off..! I felt bad and said its cuz I was nervous and my first time.. but what gives?? Any tips or advice? Thanks!!

03-23-2007, 10:12 AM	#2 (permalink)
Glory's Sun Registered User	What's wrong?? Nothing. You were nervous. It happens to guys all the time. You say she doesn't know what to do. How do you know that?? If she isn't doing it the way you like it then you need to tell her how you like it. The same goes for her. One more piece of advice... porn really doesn't teach you a whole lot. Pick up a book such as Super Hot Sex by Tracey Cox or something similar to really get a grasp on the mental side and fun bits. So just relax and explore together.. you'll get your nut soon enough. Last edited by Glory's Sun; 03-23-2007 at 06:59 PM..

03-23-2007, 10:55 AM	#4 (permalink)
JStrider Poo-tee-weet? Location: The Woodlands, TX	yah... dont expect it to be like porn... and as for cumming on the first time... I dont think I came untill my 4 or 5 time... just relax, do what feels good, talk to each other about what feels good during and after. dont worry about the difficulty you had this time... worrying too much will make the next time harder. oh and don't forget. USE PROTECTION! __________________ -=JStrider=- ~Clatto Verata Nicto

03-23-2007, 04:23 PM	#7 (permalink)
Ourcrazymodern? still, wondering. Location: South Minneapolis, somewhere near the gorgeous gorge	The little head's connected to the big head. Relax & feel good about it. __________________ BE JUST AND FEAR NOT

03-23-2007, 04:26 PM	#8 (permalink)
MEAD Insane Location: South Florida	Nerves, man. Happened to me my first (and second) time. Pretty common, really. It takes time to really get comfortable/ in the moment. Also the condom we were using was one of those extended pleasure ones (super thick and has some sorta numbing liquid) so make sure you are using the right condom for you too. __________________ Here are some phrases I'd like to be able to say, in all honesty, before I die. "That's it, send out the ninjas!" "So then I had to kill my way to the second floor."

03-23-2007, 10:17 AM	#3 (permalink)
oFia Tilted Location: Texas	Sex isn't about performing and doing it right. It's about having fun. I'd second the book by Tracey Cox - if it's what I'm thinking of. You should even be able to find it in a regular book store.

03-23-2007, 10:58 AM	#5 (permalink)
absorbentishe Boy am I horny today Location: T O L E D O, Toledo!!	You had performance anxiety, that's all. No big deal, just work through it.

03-23-2007, 11:07 AM	#6 (permalink)
analog Banned	You were nervous. Nerves can kill an erection faster than Bea Arthur. Don't sweat it, just keep calm and enjoy, it'll happen.

03-24-2007, 03:40 PM	#9 (permalink)
Julius Upright	The first (and second and third and fourth) time I had sex nothing happened, but then suddenly BOOM! and then it was on... No worries dude. It'll come (pun partially intended :P)

03-24-2007, 03:49 PM	#10 (permalink)
World's King Here Location: Denver City Denver	Really...? I came twice my first time. I guess I'm the weird one. __________________ heavy is the head that wears the crown

03-24-2007, 03:50 PM	#11 (permalink)
pig pigglet pigglet Location: Locash	well match, the problem is that your junk is broke. seriously, i dated a girl a while back who was hot and who knew exactly what she was doing. for whatever reason, it took a while until i actually lost my froth, so to speak. when things chill out, all will be well. trust me: her special purpose is made to work with your special purpose. with time and practice, the magic will reveal itself. go forth and multiply. __________________ You don't love me, you just love my piggy style

03-27-2007, 09:47 PM	#12 (permalink)
match000 Psycho	ahh cool. thanks for the tips everyone been a lil busy as u can see, but no, i dont mean sex, i mean the other relationship stuff