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Old 10-26-2006, 04:45 PM   #1 (permalink)
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I would like your opinion

I had the usual crush on the girl next door but she had a girlfriend. I respected that for about 4 months, but then, for whatever reason, she started to stay the night. We never had sex but we would sleep next to each other at least 5 out of 7 nights of the week. So then after a month of that I decided I would make my move. So it started off as just fingering and she was giving me a hand job. Then I wanted to go further but she said no because she had a girlfriend. I thought that was wierd but maybe her morals kicked it and realized that what she was doing was wrong. She would still spend the night and sleep in the same bed as me but she didnt let me start anything. Then all of the sudden she said she was engaged!!! At first I thought it was the girlfriend, but it turned out to be an old boyfriend that came back from the army. Even though she now had a boyfriend and the girlfriend (who didnt know about each other), she would still end up sleeping over at my house. Then about 2 weeks into the engagement she realized that she wanted to have sex with me before she got married to the army guy. Of course being a guy, I thought with the wrong head...
And from that point on it was a total downfall. She ended up coming over and we would just have sex ontop of sex. I even ended up going to a club with this girl and her fiance, and she got up enough nerve to start making out with me while the guy was in the bathroom. But now things are settling down. She broke it off with the girlfriend and fiance. But due to the way we started this relationship, I have a hard time trusting her. She says that she is faithful but something in my gut is turning and I cant tell if I am paranoid or crazy for continuing a relationship built on an affair.
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Old 10-26-2006, 05:42 PM   #2 (permalink)
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That sounds totally crazy. Move on and write a short novel about the ridiculousness you were jsut involved with.
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Old 10-26-2006, 05:44 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Dude, get out. If she can't keep a steady relationship and make sudden dramatic big chances, then you're in for trouble if you try to pursue her.
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Old 10-26-2006, 06:08 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Run away, and write the hilarious tale of your whirlwind craziness with this woman. That's the kinda story a person is hard-pressed to make up- so capitalize on the truth of it. lol
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Old 10-26-2006, 08:25 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Don't those stories always start out:

Dear Penthouse,
I never thought something like this would happen to me, but... ?


Anyway, this girl sounds like she's a jumper. Jumping from one thing to the next. Now, it could very well be that you are the one she really does want to be with and because of that she won't fool around anymore, but the chances of that being the case are pretty slim. If you enjoy hanging out with her, then by all means continue, just make sure you know what you're getting into and don't be surprised if she suddenly tells you that she's engaged to some random guy she ran into.

You could also go the honest route and tell her how you feel and never get to have sex with her again, but at least you'll still be able to respect yourself.
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Old 10-26-2006, 09:06 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Location: in love
well, honestly, it sounds like she doesn't know what she wants. This is always dangerous foundation to build a lasting relationship on.

I would be honest with her about how you feel.

And if you decide to really make this work, perhaps a bit of couples therapy might be helpful in starting this relationship out on more stable footing and understanding her actions and your feelings about them better.

sweetpea
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Old 10-26-2006, 10:19 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Yeah I really do need to have a serious talk with her. It is so hard to vent to my friends because they are tied up in the lies too. Thanks for your advice.
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Old 10-26-2006, 11:49 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Location: in love
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnyOtherDay
Yeah I really do need to have a serious talk with her. It is so hard to vent to my friends because they are tied up in the lies too. Thanks for your advice.
Well, we are here to listen.

But in the end, it's you who knows how you truly feel about the situation. Good luck and most of all, be true to yourself when you do end up having the discussion with her, hopefully sooner than later.

sweetpea
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Old 10-27-2006, 05:48 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Location: T O L E D O, Toledo!!
Well, I guess if you chock it up to a fun relationship, then just have all the sex you can while she is still willing. Try to meet other women, but keep on tapping while available. You obviously can't "settle" down with this chick, so have fun.
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Old 10-27-2006, 08:18 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Location: Spring, Texas
1: how old are the two of you? Sometimes age and all has an important part

2: how long has she been having sex? is she new to it?

3: how long have you two known each other? been friends for a long time?

4: do YOU have feeling for her? (be honest with yourself and us, we don't judge)

Quote:
Then about 2 weeks into the engagement she realized that she wanted to have sex with me before she got married to the army guy. Of course being a guy, I thought with the wrong head...
Sounds to me like she might have been looking for a final "fling", MANY people do that.

5: Whats her number?...lmao (just kidding!!!!)
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Old 10-27-2006, 08:29 AM   #11 (permalink)
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jummmmpperrrrrrrrrr
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Old 10-27-2006, 09:26 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Any chance you can work a threeway out of the deal before you get away?
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Old 10-27-2006, 09:55 AM   #13 (permalink)
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You're gut instinct is usually right. Cut bait and sail away.
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