Just an update, last night we had a kind of breakthrough, she came to bed nude (this never happens she is a wollen PJ's kind of girl) and she initiated a lovemaking session that lasted over two hours. She had about an hour of nervous chatter before she worked up the nerve to kiss me but I didn't push, I let her do everything, I made it totally clear that she was in control. I think the thought of going to counselling is making her realize that she CAN trust me, because instead of running away, I am working with her to help solve her problems. Thank you all so much for your wonderful support, I dont know how much longer I could have gone without someone to talk to.

This is a wonderful community, and if any of you ever need help, do not hesitate to email me or ask here.

thanks again

Well Hot diggity dog!!! That is so completely awesome...

Yay for you!!! and your missus...

/me for a moment, feels slightly less cynical than usual...

I'm right there with ya, Mal.

*sniffle*
Sometimes, a person tests the boundaries, and pushes, waiting to see if you really love them enough to stick with them through heavy duty shit. They don't even realize that's what they're doing, but it is.

I admire your stick-to-it-iveness. You are proving daily that she can trust you and you will love her anyway. It's a hard education to give, but trust me, it's even harder to receive it. I'm really happy for you both!

Nicely put, Jess. I fully agree, mostly because that was a big part of ktspktsp's and my relationship so far and it really does just take time, and ultimately, grace.

To the OP: Congratulations, man. :thumbsup: I am with Mal in saying that this knocks my often cynical attitude right on its back. I am very glad for the steps you and your wife are taking together... this is what being intimate is all about. Not necessarily the sex (which is great) :) but what it takes to be physically and emotionally vulnerable with another human being, over a long period of time. It takes work, and letting go, all at once. :)

Please keep us updated! We love to hear GOOD stories like this. :D

YAY! *does the happy dance*

I am so amazingly happy for you! I'm so amazingly happy period! Hooray for sex, hooray for great relationships, HOORAY FOR COMMUNICATION! I totally agree with what JustJess said about testing a relationship's limits- good for you for being proactive!

*cheers*

I'm so glad that you're taking the first step for you both to take control of your marriage and keep it on the right track.

I firmly believe that every newly married/married-to-be couple should attend couples counseling either before or after (or both) the wedding. Couples counseling is not for crazies its for helping two entirely different entities form a joint entity and function well as a team.

I wish you both the best.

yay!! i'm very happy for you both, hopefully even more good things will come of it, and good luck still with counseling, i bet it will help even more than "just the idea of counseling" :) good for you, you are a really good man :)

I was more watching this thread, as I didn't have anything decent to say lol, but kick arse :D that's awesome, well done dude :D g'luck for monday.


And

agreed lol ;<

hey all, sorry for the lag between updates, but we went to the counsellor on monday and things are going to be ok, I hope. We agreed to see her once a week together and once a month seperately (her idea) I want to thank you all for your support once again
love
-Brian

That's just awesome - I'm glad it's appearing to have a happy ending... well done...

well, Im a day late and a dollar short, but congratulations anyway! its good to see a bad situation turn for the better