I think Ustwo gave some great advice. If you're not happy with yourself you're not going to be happy with anyone or anything else. Work on your own problems first and see if that has a positive impact on your marriage. You do have a LOT of issues to work through--I would highly recommend starting a good diet/exercise regimen AND getting yourself some personal counseling. Those things can make all the difference in the world.

-gone-

I have removed this post.

I wanted to point out that I think it's very brave of you to post like this and make yourself vulnerable, and to be open to advice. Acknowledging that there is a problem is the first positive step to correcting it. Doing it in a public forum must be difficult, but often revealing posts like these can really be beneficial to others as well.
Thank you. Good luck, and *please* take action soon and keep us updated.

I think realizing you have a problem is the first step to fixing it
ignore everyone here who bashes you, I think you're being honest and truthful with your feelings.

I don't think there's an easy answer to how you feel. I would say definitely try talking to your wife, try being active with her physically so that you both can lose some weight and even that might be enough to imrpove your sex life.

If you think divorce is still the answer, I would try a temporary seperation, take an extended vacation away from the house and just be by yourself for a bit to let your feelings sink in.

Clear out the distractions and what other people are saying and just focus on yourself. Think about what you really want, and what makes you happy, and then go for it.