Catmandu

The wife and I finally talked to our daughter about the math class issue. The kid was adamantly opposed to 2 things: taking the class again, and us talking with her teacher to see where she stands. She didn't do a very good job of convincing us that she should move forward. She said the class was a chapter behind, and so had to move at double-time to catch up over the last 3 weeks. She says everyone in the class had a problem with the increased quantity of material. So, my wife IS going to talk it out with the teacher. I'm too confrontational, so I'm staying away. We told the kid that we will never do anything without telling her first. She's not happy about it, but at least she knows that we have to sometimes act like real parents. We've always had more of a friend/friend kind of relationship instead of parent/child.

astrahl

You have to make her believe that and understand that she cannot blame poor teachers and classroom size for poor performance. I sat in college with 300-500 other students in one room - the professors look right through you and it is up to YOU to read and study to make the grade. If she wants to get into college, she must have more pride in her future than that, get-by attitude.

That is the issue here. As a freshman, she is probably still under the impression that good grades are just keep your parents off your ass. The truth, which we all know, is that those grades are all steps, the stronger the steps you build up to college the easier that threshold is to cross.

If she insists on taking things as easy as they will come - sure, she may pass her courses, but no college worth its reputation wants a half-ass, do-it-to-get-by student.

Her grades should become a source of pride and self-motivation. I would not make her retake the course. I faltered in my freshman year too. I came from a private elementary school that pushed grades and classwork so hard - I thought I'd BREEEZE through high school. I sobered up and ended up with 5 semesters of 3.7 or better and got into a great university.

Do praise her for the excellent showing in the other courses. Make sure that you don't focus on her weaknesses...celebrate her strengths too. That may help with that sense of pride too.

In all this, I have to say, i DO NOT miss school! LOL

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Catmandu

Astrahl, you made a very good point. I think she DOES feel that good grades are what keeps your parents off your back. The pride of accomplishment just isn't there for her yet. I think it will over time.

Blue Fish

Maybe look into some outside help to reinforce the school work. If you live near a college you might be able to find students who tutor. When my wife was in grad school she tutored high school students 3 nights a week and it was all arranged by the grad department. Where I live there are a few 'companies' that offer tutoring. The one-on-one help may her focus more on the areas that are giving her problems rather then spending another semester sitting through all the same material.

Derwood

A few points:

- Just because your daughter does well in other advanced courses (history, english, etc.) doesn't mean she will do well in advanced math. This is a trap many students fall into because of over zealous parents and/or lazy counsellors.

- I basically got straight B's in high school because I got A's on the tests and didn't do the homework. Math, in particular, annoyed me because I grasped it very quickly, and I felt that if I understood the concept after doing 4 problems, why should I have to do 50 more for homework?

- Some things aren't rleated to intelligence/ability. My brother in law just barely graduated high school despite being extremely bright. For whatever reason, he had no motivation in school, didn't study, didn't do homework, and his grades were horrible. No reflection on his ability or smarts.

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Catmandu

I feel humbly educated by all of the good advice and stories related in this thread. Thanks to all of you.

Lasereth

I made two C's in high school. Both of them were in math classes. Other than two other abysmally bad teachers, I made A's and B's the rest of the time. In college, my GPA is hovering at 3.5 cumulative. That's <I>much</I> better than the average college student at my school. I can honestly say that high school algebra is the toughest subject I ever had, mainly because the teachers are NOT willing to go over material that you don't understand for lengths of time. It holds up the class and makes you be made fun of during class. In college, I had an excellent teacher that would go over anything I didn't understand. I took a college algebra class that was basically all high school maths combined into one and made a 97 in it.

A "C" is not a bad grade in high school algebra. Like I mentioned, the only two C's I made in high school were both in algebra classes. I wouldn't make her retake the class. Hell, I wouldn't even be angry at her. Algebra is a really rough subject for most people. One C will not damage your transcript so bad that you couldn't get into a university unless she plans on going to a high-end, Ivy League school. I made those two C's trying my absolute hardest in the classes, studying each night and doing the homework. If it were any other class I might be concerned, but algebra is just tough unless you have a teacher that can cater to your every question until you "get it."

I never did well in high school with algebra, and then in college blew away the course with an A+. The C's didn't hurt me or my mathematical knowledge. I'm sure your daughter would have did better with a different teacher, but it doesn't mean she hasn't learned concepts that will be useful later on.

-Lasereth

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mystmarimatt

The funny thing about my schooling, or, perhaps, the sad thing, is that in high school, I breezed by all of the math classes, getting B's and A's without ever really learning anything from them. It wasn't that I didn't try...although that may have been part, but just that the teachers I had were bad, and not able to see how often kids didn't get it. I got most of it, mind you, but I never really 'picked up' anything that I didn't already know, mostly because my best friend was a mathematical whiz kid, and had been showing me how to do advanced stuff since we were little. Those classes were pretty much a waste to me, I just lucked out by having a useful friend.

See what happens with a different teacher, though, If she really feels the need to retake it.

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EULA

Ah, yes. The wonders of school. I'm going to guess that the teacher was protecting his/her job instead of minding the needs of the students. There's a big reason why Socrates refused to be paid for his teaching.

What's your daughter doing in high school anyway? If she's going to college, she'll have to take those classes all over again. Unless she plans on taking a bunch of AP courses and testing out of her college classes, then she would better be served by being declared homeschooled and start working. What's even better is she could be declared homeschooled, start working, and study at her own pace for the AP exams.

Colleges love homschooled students.

Catmandu

Well, that's a different take on the situation... I will say that we live in an area where homeschooling is quite common. My daughter hangs out with at least 6 kids who are homeschooled. It's not an option for us, however. I'm not trying to create a little Einstein. I just need to know she's trying her best and getting something out of it.