What's wrong with polygamy? - Page 3 - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Rodney · 11-27-2004, 05:48 PM

It's not for me, but I have no problem with it as long as everybody goes in as a consenting adult.

In the case of the Utah Mormon-derived cults, the husbands were actually given power over their wives in excess of what is normally deemed acceptable. The women weren't considered equal. Moreover, one of the cult-leaders was arranging a marriage between his 14-year-old daughter and his 45-year-old friend. She had no say in it.

That said, anything that works between consenting adults and makes them happy and healthy is okay by me. I don't think that monogamy or polygamy are in themselves more or less selfish than one another. Selfish of whom? About what?

The major advantage of legal, monogamous marriage in our culture is that, as a legal institution, it comes with a package of rights and protections that are denied to other types of marriage, even male/female relationships in which no ceremony or piece of paper has been proferred.

For a non-legal marriage, you can build your own safety net out of legal agreements, powers of attorney, and trusts. But you really have to make sure that you have all the bases covered, and even then a vengeful relative can always try to throw a monkey wrench into the works in case of serious illness or accident (take guardianship of the injured party away from the partner, etc.)

TexanAvenger · 11-27-2004, 06:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScottKuma

But would it work? I can see a few problems:

How to handle jealousy within the group, especially where sexuality is concerned.
How to handle those who wish to leave the family group, both from an emotional and an economic standpoint.

#1 is probably the toughest -- jealousy is an inescapable part of being human. Having Joe sleeping exclusively with Emma, for example, might cause another member of the group to harbor resentment towards the offending couple.

#2 is probably the easier -- have strict contractual agreements from the onset with regards to joining / leaving the group. Since these agreements are inevitably about money, you either leave with a share of the group's total assets, or you leave with nothing. Either way, spell it out contractually and there shouldn't be a problem.

The way I see it, any relationship between a group of people who honestly care about each other and want to be in the relationship in the first place can handle situations such as these just like any monogamous couple would. Honestly, I'm surprised more polygamy hasn't occured in the United States. I don't mean the forementioned "cult" polygamy which is basically results in a man with multiple wives. I'd honestly like to see groups of people who honestly care for and love each other be able to be married as a group without being looked upon as abnormal.

kd4 · 11-28-2004, 02:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by filtherton

Why don't you support polygamy in any form?

Well I guess I should have said that I don't condemn polygamy but neither do I condone it.

11-27-2004, 05:48 PM	#81 (permalink)
Rodney Observant Ruminant Location: Rich Wannabe Hippie Town	It's not for me, but I have no problem with it as long as everybody goes in as a consenting adult. In the case of the Utah Mormon-derived cults, the husbands were actually given power over their wives in excess of what is normally deemed acceptable. The women weren't considered equal. Moreover, one of the cult-leaders was arranging a marriage between his 14-year-old daughter and his 45-year-old friend. She had no say in it. That said, anything that works between consenting adults and makes them happy and healthy is okay by me. I don't think that monogamy or polygamy are in themselves more or less selfish than one another. Selfish of whom? About what? The major advantage of legal, monogamous marriage in our culture is that, as a legal institution, it comes with a package of rights and protections that are denied to other types of marriage, even male/female relationships in which no ceremony or piece of paper has been proferred. For a non-legal marriage, you can build your own safety net out of legal agreements, powers of attorney, and trusts. But you really have to make sure that you have all the bases covered, and even then a vengeful relative can always try to throw a monkey wrench into the works in case of serious illness or accident (take guardianship of the injured party away from the partner, etc.) Last edited by Rodney; 11-27-2004 at 05:54 PM..