clavus

The cold reality is that I could die before my kids grow up. I wrote some things down for them, in case I am not around to teach thme this stuff. Has anyone else done something like this?
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One voice can make a difference.

Avoid violence. If you must fight, hit first, hit hard, and fight dirty.

Never refuse an offered breath mint.

Don’t pray for patience, you may have to learn it.

Government will lie to you.

Brake before the turn. Accelerate through it.

Respect nature. She is bigger and stronger than you are. She is as beautiful as she is merciless.

Always cut away from yourself.

Life is not fair. The left hand pays for the mistakes of the right. (see above)

Gravity is a cruel mistress

Everything fun involves risk. True peace is found when the risks are deemed acceptable. True happiness occurs every time you get away without paying the price.

In shooting, be sure of your target and what lies beyond your target.

Naked is good.

Those with greater skill can be beaten by those who work harder.

Religious fanatics tend to have limited actual knowledge of their religion.

Eloquent words may not be true; nor true words eloquent.

Get in good physical condition in your teen years. The effects will last a long time.

A vocal minority can rule a silent majority.

Pray to communicate with God; not to demonstrate to others how you communicate with God.

Be kind to those weaker than you.

Keep your promises.

When in doubt, keep you mouth closed.

Our military treats its officers one-hundred fold better than it treats the enlisted men and women. If the military is in your future, do everything in your power to be an officer... And don't invade Russia in the Winter. That never works.

It is better to undercook fish and overcook pork than the other way around.

Learn the religion of your community, even if you do not practice it.

If you do not know how, ask.

People love to talk about themselves. Ask a person about himself, and an awkward silence is chased from the room.

Vote.

There is no greater force than love.

Make your point, then shut up.

If you listen closely enough, many women will actually tell you what they want.

Some girls like boys who mistreat them. These same girls will want to be your friend, but nothing more. It makes no sense. Push them hard enough and they will break your heart.

You must love yourself before you can enjoy a loving relationship.

I love you.

Pour acid into water, not the other way around.

Keep all your options open long enough, and you won’t have any left. There comes a time when you must commit.

Fanaticism is the most dangerous of all evils.

The lust for power is the single greatest human vice.

90% of everything is crap. Just because something is popular doesn't mean it is good, and it doesn;t mean that you have to like it.

Don’t play with mercury.

Don’t try to be popular. Be yourself – your friends will be true friends and their respect will be genuine.

You can not be friends with everybody. Some people will not like you. Their loss.

If you whack your fingernail with a hammer, pinch the injured nail down hard and hold it for a while. It will hurt a lot, but you will probably save the nail and prevent a lot of future discomfort).

Be polite to cops. This gives respect to those who deserve it, and the ones who don’t will be more likely to pick on somebody else.

Be brief in your dealings with the police.

Pay your taxes.

Use exclamation points like profanity – sparingly, for effect.

Nothing beats a direct quote.

Encourage cats. Discipline dogs.

The most powerful thing you can be is yourself.

Sometimes it is enough to know that you are right. You don’t always have to prove it.

Learn how to give a good massage.

Admit your mistake and move on to the next one.

When you appreciate how little you really know, then you begin to truly learn.

If it seems too good to be true, it probably is.

Be kind to your mother.

Do what you enjoy, not what others think you should enjoy.

Things always get better. Given time, today’s overwhelming problem will be a mere footnote in your conscience. This is the most important piece of advice I can give you. Remember this above all else. Throughout my life, I was prone to dark moods and entertained a host of schemes for self-destruction. But there were so many great times in my life when I looked back and thanked God that I didn’t kill myself.

If you are reading this, then I am most likely dead. I hope that you know that I love you both more than I love myself. I will do everything in my power to watch over you.

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(to my 4-year old)
– you are an incredibly special person. In your first days in this world, you comforted a woman who had just lost her father. You befriended a cat which did not tolerate any other children. You have a tremendous kindness within you, a soothing nature and wisdom beyond your years. The world can be hard on people like you. Remember who you are.

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(to my 1-year old)
– you too are an incredibly special person. You are a force of nature; relentless like the tide and joyful in abundance. You jump into new experiences with both feet and grab life with both hands and shake it. Never forget the tremendous inner joy that lights you. Be aware of those quieter souls whom you pull into your orbit. Watch over your brother.

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Ass, gas or grass. Nobody rides for free.

dirtyrascal7

that's an awesome idea. i'm only 22 and don't have kids (and hopefully won't for quite a while), but i think i'm going to start a list right now.

by the way... didn't you forget one?

Always keep a spare key hidden outside.

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"Tie yourself to your limitless potential, rather than your limiting past."

"Every man I meet is my superior in some way. In that, I learn of him."

Averett

clavus, can you be my dad?

That was really very touching. Please be sure to save this list for your sons. They will love it.

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Absence is to love what wind is to fire. It extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.

clavus

Some things they must learn for themselves.

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Ass, gas or grass. Nobody rides for free.

gar1976

ha! Experience is the best teacher for that one.

cj22009

Clavus that was a very good idea Im going to do that for my 6yr old and 3yr old thanks man

Yakk

Thanks clavus.

Along the same lines as "gravity is a harsh mistress":

Not all machines are safe.

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Last edited by JHVH : 10-29-4004 BC at 09:00 PM. Reason: Time for a rest.

PayUp

Very nice. Some good advice for a lot people in that list.

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Born to Lose.

fairsquare

Primum non nocere

sexymama

Inspiring -- thank you!

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If you can go deeply into lovemaking, the ego disappears. That is the beauty of lovemaking, that it is another source of a glimpse of god

It's not about being perfect; it's about developing some skill at managing imperfection.

analog

The best three pieces of advice, ever, as far as I'm concerned. Great list.

agball

Excellent, but too depressing for me to think about. I have a 3 year old & one year old as well. Hope I don't go anywhere soon!!

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"A friend with weed is a friend indeed"

Spanxxx

nice words clavus.

I'll have two sons....soon. One is about to pop out soon, and the other is 2.5. I'll have to keep this list in mind.

Here's one for your list that my dad told me when he and I bought motorcycles to ride together, but it applies to all driving situations.

"Remember son, no matter who you think was right or wrong, the bigger car wins."

When riding a motorcycle, these words are invaluable, but they carry over in to all forms of driving as well. Of course, my wife won't let me have a motorcycle now. Bah, growing up stinks man! =).

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I think that's what they mean by "nickels a day can feed a child." I thought, "How could food be so cheap over there?" It's not, they just eat nickels. - (supposedly) Peter Nguyen, internet hero

irseg

That's why I have a motorcycle and a 4000-pound Lincoln. I figure if you average the safety of the two together, it ends up about the same as driving something like a Civic.

My dad's driving advice was to always be careful around bars. That's definitely come in handy a few times.

matteo101

Clavus, that was truelly inspiring. I mean, that was good advice for anyone. I pray that your kids never have to read that. Thankyou for that.

gonadman

I like the personal messages most of all

Here's the best single advice on driving:

Always assume every other driver on the road is an idiot.

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For me there is only the traveling on paths that have heart, on any path that may have heart. There I travel, and the only worthwhile challenge is to traverse its full length. And there I travel, looking, looking, ...breathlessly.
-Carlos Castaneda

ZodGilla

What an awesome list! Reading this gave me goosebumps...

And this gave me a giggle:

mingusfingers

Brake before the turn. Accelerate through it.
In shooting, be sure of your target and what lies beyond your target.
Arg! Why didn't I have these.

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Still Looking

dieseldog

Make sure to hand-write it for them, so they know it's not just an e-mail forward you got

Damn good advice.

raeanna74

Thanks for sharing. Mind if I borrow some of it.

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"Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama
My Karma just ran over your Dogma.

etla

Like: "Always have a backup" People don't until they needed one and didn't have it.

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Subvert the Dominant Paradigm