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Nepenthes 11-16-2010 07:33 PM

Owner of a lonely heart is better than
 
To re-word a quote from the lyrics of Yes's "Owner of a Lonely Heart" song:

An owner of a lonely heart is better off than the owner of a broken heart.
I see a person with a lonely heart has a chance to improve their situation and has a more neutral situation compared to those with a broken heart. A person with a broken heart feels more pain as it is can be like a wound than cannot completely heal.

This is in contrast to "It is better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all."

Which do you find is generally more true?

A few related observations are:

I find a theme of "Ignorance is bliss" in the lonely heart.
I think that "Time heals all wounds" is false.

amonkie 11-16-2010 10:11 PM

My favorite quote along these lines is probably "out of the darkest of nights, always comes the brightest days"

Pain is educational. It gives you a point of reference you didn't have before.

fresnelly 11-17-2010 06:40 AM

The trick is not to get addicted to the high of being lonely or broken-hearted.

That's right. I said "high".

Not to make light of real depression and misery but there's a state of wallow (familial to the quantum "Does she like me or does she not?" Zone) that can be addicting.

If you live a dull life, (sleep, eat, work, sleep...) broken heartedness and loneliness can add some comforting drama and story that's safer than actually pursuing another mate or forgetting a past one that defined you.

Moving on means a clean slate but also a lack of boundary and anchor. Uncharted Territory in other words that is a lot less comfortable than a warm bed with the shades drawn and Ron Sexsmith on the stereo.

jewels 11-17-2010 06:57 AM

Totally disagree.

'Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all


- Lord ALfred Tennyson

I've never regretted a relationship that has given me such joy, no matter how brief the moment. There may have been one that has left my heart unhealed, but a small wound was so worth the time we had.

Some are never fortunate enough to know that level of passion. I would welcome it again with arms wide open.

L_Driver 11-17-2010 03:35 PM

I don't know which i would rather have. Broken hearts are no fun and I make pains not to let that happen again, but I don't think I would ever want a lonely heart.

I will go for former.

spindles 11-17-2010 03:54 PM

You learn from the bad things that happen, even the relationships that ended badly. People crave interactions with other people. Being lonely is bad. Note that Lonely is not the same as Alone. I like to spend time alone at times.

Charlatan 11-17-2010 04:04 PM

If you don't risk it all, what is the point? I am with Tennyson.

Zeraph 11-21-2010 07:31 PM

At least the broken heart guy got a chance. The lonely heart never even knew.

Plan9 11-21-2010 08:35 PM

Use whatever experiences you have to shape your interactions with others in a positive way and avoid falling into the hurt or be hurt mentality.

ASU2003 11-22-2010 09:12 PM

As a lonely person, I don't really feel emotionally damaged. Things could be worse, and I would not be able to handle some situations (accidental death of girlfriend, catching her cheating, etc...)

Plan9 11-22-2010 09:27 PM

Lonely or alone?

ZombieSquirrel 11-22-2010 10:38 PM

My heart was broken by the loss of my parents at such an early age. I am glad that I had a warm heart to break. I couldn't imagine living a life where I wasn't loved by such awesome people. I feel sorry for those who do not have a close relationship with their parents. The absence of that love seems so lonely.

So in this case, it truly is better to have loved and loss than to have never have loved at all.

bagatelle 12-02-2010 08:36 AM

What would life be without love and losses? :confused: It takes time to recover and this time for mourning needs to be spent, but I don't like people dwelling in this state of loneliness without handling the issues properly, if there's a chance.

I agree with fresnelly; one should not get high with the feeling. I have noticed some people may even use the loneliness (when been left) as a shield of sorts - the relationship ended ages ago, but they can't get over it and move on.

Some people yearn to experience the falling in love over and over again. They don't even take time to have a broken heart, they try to mend it with another experience asap.


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