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Old 07-02-2003, 06:04 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Is jesus coming back?

There is this guy that walks around the mall in my area. His name is Jesus. He wears rags as cloths, doesn't shave, and lives at the homeless shelter. He is the nicest man you could ever meet and always has some kind advice. He says he has come back for his children.

Now, my question. If Jesus came back would the Christians know or would society shrug him off as a crazy homeless guy?

Discuss.

Last edited by Darkblack; 07-02-2003 at 06:19 AM..
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Old 07-02-2003, 07:00 AM   #2 (permalink)
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I would find it incredibly amusing if Jesus came back only to be locked away in a looney bin.
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Old 07-02-2003, 07:40 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Going to go the way of the 'crazy homeless guy' side of things, with him either already locked away, or on his way there now. Gotta love it


At any rate, who the hell says Jesus will be returning to any place but his "home" land? Of course with the way things are around there he's just as likely to be revered as he is to die from a suicide bombing.
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Old 07-02-2003, 07:42 AM   #4 (permalink)
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ahh. So why the hell is he in my MALL!

jk.

I see your point though.
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Old 07-02-2003, 07:47 AM   #5 (permalink)
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coming back to where? Isreal? America? The Planet Earth?

no I don't think so. it's be nice if he did... but odds are against it.
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Old 07-02-2003, 07:53 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Well isn't he suppose to come back? I have not read the bible in 15 years or so but I thought he was suppose to come back agian.
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Old 07-02-2003, 08:03 AM   #7 (permalink)
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i'd love to see it.

i bet the christians would dismiss him as fake
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Old 07-02-2003, 08:07 AM   #8 (permalink)
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For this one brief moment in time, the "Is Jesus Coming Back?" thread is appearing contiguously with the "Was Jesus Black?" thread.

This can only lead to the one, true answer to both questions:

He's back, he's black, and he's bad!
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Old 07-02-2003, 09:25 AM   #9 (permalink)
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According to the Bible, when he comes back, it'll be pretty damn obvious.
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Old 07-02-2003, 11:04 AM   #10 (permalink)
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I'm pretty sure that if Jesus came back, he would be expecting not be be believed. Fling about a couple of miracles, and he'll be right as rain!
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Old 07-02-2003, 11:25 AM   #11 (permalink)
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umm the guy died... Last I checked when people die they can't come back... especially after 2000 years or so.
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Old 07-02-2003, 11:29 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Well, Christians believe differently. I was not looking for the opinion of non-Christians really. I am a non-Christian and I know how we feel about it. I was curious to what they think and believe.
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Old 07-02-2003, 11:48 AM   #13 (permalink)
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*Muslims believe that Jesus is coming back too*
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Old 07-02-2003, 12:41 PM   #14 (permalink)
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It depends... is he white? Cause christ wasn't... contrary to popular belief.
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Old 07-02-2003, 02:04 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Who cares? He's not coming back at any rate.
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Old 07-02-2003, 02:08 PM   #16 (permalink)
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if i remember correctly, the Bible does not say he will return physically, he will return spiritually and establish his kingdom and ultimately full reign on earth.
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Old 07-02-2003, 02:09 PM   #17 (permalink)
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Asaris has it very right. The promise that Jesus will return in bodily form to Earth is cocurrant with the prophesy of the apocolypse...which by all accounts will certainly be noticable. So if you see seals being broken, Ned Flanders dissapearing in to thin air, and the armies of Gog and Magog assembling, it may not be the right time to get that new tatoo that everyone is getting....
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Old 07-02-2003, 03:40 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Why would he come back?
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Old 07-02-2003, 04:38 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by duckznutz
Why would he come back?
To tell us how much we all are horrible excuses for living creatures and to bring about our eternal damnation... You know, same ol, same ol.
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Old 07-02-2003, 09:03 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Well, if I was Jesus, and had a look at the world, I'd be back.
I'd be casting level 3 Fireball on a lot of people, like Jerry Falwell.
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Old 07-02-2003, 09:22 PM   #21 (permalink)
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If this topic intrigues you, you should check out the book "The Return" by Joe De Mers. It's fiction and deals with this very same topic. Damn good read, even for the non-religious. Sorry, there are no pictures in it.
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Old 07-02-2003, 09:58 PM   #22 (permalink)
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I dunno it's been what like 1,970 odd some years since he left. It would seem to me he's avoiding us like that crazy uncle nobody likes. Seriously though if he came back in physical form I'd imagine that in some way he would be known fairly well through the media but either no one would realize he was the son of God or those who followed him would be categorized as cultists by mainstream society.
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Old 07-02-2003, 10:03 PM   #23 (permalink)
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I believe if he did come back it would cause too much of a stir and people wouldn't accept him. And it would make alot of people confused/crazy.
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Old 07-02-2003, 10:29 PM   #24 (permalink)
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Today on Geraldo: Jesus.
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Old 07-03-2003, 03:39 AM   #25 (permalink)
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If i understand correctly, he comes back with trumpets blowing, then all those who believe in Him go up to meet him in the sky.
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Old 07-03-2003, 04:58 AM   #26 (permalink)
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"A lot of Christians wear crosses around their necks. You think when Jesus comes back he ever wants to see a fucking cross? It's like going up to Jackie Onassis wearing a rifle pendant."
-bill hicks

maybe he'll come back after we get rid of all these crosses!
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Old 07-03-2003, 06:41 AM   #27 (permalink)
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and man, is he pissed.

"Jesus is Coming. Everyone look busy."

I don't remember where I saw that for the first time, but it's still funny to me.

Modern "Christianity" is so far from what Yeshua ben Miriam actually taught his disciples that he'd be appalled at what has been done in his name.

Let's Review:

1) Jesus accepted a bunch of societal outcasts into his group. Lepers, prostitutes, tax collectors, people of all faiths and nationalities. Modern Christianity is all about making people conform to a "Moral Standard" that Christ himself never imposed on anyone.

2) Moneychangers in the temple / "Give to Caeser what is Caeser's. . ." I defy you to name a modern Christian organization that doesn't demand money from you when you attend one of their gatherings. In the ministry of one very famous "healer", a recent HBO special recently exposed that those who donate the most are the most likely to be called up onstage to "receive the spirit".

3) The name and creed of Jesus Christ has been used to justify more torture, oppression, mutilation, and murder than any other factor in the years since he walked the earth. Jesus preached a doctrine (I am loathe to call it that, it was more a philosophy at the time) of inclusive, genuine peace and love. People who claimed to be following his lead have been reponsible for the decimation of entire populations during the European colonial period , the Inquisitions of the middle ages, the Crusades, and many other atrocities too numerous to list.

If Jesus is coming, I expect he'd be here to chew bubble gum and kick the collective ass of those who sought power and abused his name and teachings to gain it.

Hopefully, they're will be a shortage of Bazooka(r) when he arrives. . .
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Old 07-03-2003, 07:11 AM   #28 (permalink)
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I read this thread and realize that a lot of people have been done wrong by religion, and people supposedly representing Jesus. First off, I point people to what Jesus himself said about his return in the book of Revelation (which, by the way is the english translation of the greek word apokolypsis, thus the concept of an apocalypse) He said that he would be coming back to earth in a physical form that would be recognizable in that he still bears the scars of his crusifixion, but he is coming back in power to gather up his people and to rule the nations with a rod of iron. He will cast satan into the pit for a thousand years, and all on their own the nations will rebel, and then he will judge all of creation, wipe out heaven and earth and create and place a new heaven and earth, and a new jerusalem, and will make his dwelling place with man for eternity. Read revelation for all of the cryptic details. He promised that this race (generation for a less than stellar translation) would not pass from the earth before his return. That means that no matter how hard we try to wipe ourselves out, he's coming before that. Alright, to all of those that are rightfully pissed off at money grubbing, misrepresenting, hateful, judgemental so-called christians, I don't blame you. Right now there is a huge movement all over the world that is drawing christians back to the original ideas that Jesus taught, without all of the man made trappings and requirements, and I would encourage anyone interested in finding out about it to email me. No, I am not looking for converts, and I have nothing to sell. Jesus always dealt with people personally, and ignored what others had to say about the situation. And that is where we have to meet him, so if people claiming to be christians are trying to tell you how to act, tell em to shut up and try reading the bible. If you want to know who Jesus is, read the bible yourself, don't ever just believe what you have been told.
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Old 07-03-2003, 06:14 PM   #29 (permalink)
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so all it takes is the complete irradication of humanity to prove christianity wrong? i'll get to work!
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Old 07-04-2003, 10:26 AM   #30 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by bermuDa
so all it takes is the complete irradication of humanity to prove christianity wrong? i'll get to work!

ooohh oooooh...can I help? It'll give me something constructive to do over the summer months, before I start back into college, seeing as how I can't get a job.
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Old 07-04-2003, 10:43 AM   #31 (permalink)
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good at chemistry? start working on a serum that'll render men sterile. I'll draw up plans for mass distribution
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Old 07-04-2003, 12:59 PM   #32 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by bermuDa
so all it takes is the complete irradication of humanity to prove christianity wrong? i'll get to work!
Count me in!
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Old 07-07-2003, 03:02 PM   #33 (permalink)
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Jesus was a Jew and Jews are generally light skinned but Jesus was not an Anglo Saxon as many painting and such depict him. As for returning, yeah, I say he is returning. I doubt he will return in the way like alot of Southern Baptist in America say he will return. I have never read and direct or indirect reference to a Rapture that they think and lot of churches claim will Happen. But, one thing is for certain, we he does get here, lot of Bastards on Trinty Broadcast Network are going to have to answer for the crap they spit out to the entire friggin world.
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Old 07-07-2003, 03:56 PM   #34 (permalink)
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Recognizing Jesus would probably have to do more with humility than anything else. Jesus mentioned in the Bible that whatever we do for those less fortunate than us, we do for him. I definitely think that even a lot of Christians would at least initially miss Jesus if he were to come back physically, I mean just look at what the religious experts of his day did to him! He fulfilled their prophecies and they tortured and killed him. If Jesus were to return physically and not spiritually as the Bible says, I think it would be in a form so lowly that the proud would never notice him.

Hell, I'll even go out on a limb and say there is a slim-to-none possibility that Darkblack hangs out with Jesus at his mall.
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Old 07-07-2003, 07:40 PM   #35 (permalink)
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Yeah, He's coming back.


(though, if you're up for destructive plans, styrofoam and gasoline make great napalm...........so I've heard )
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Old 07-07-2003, 11:43 PM   #36 (permalink)
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Maybe he already came back and everyone was too busy playing EQ to realize it. Boy, wouldn't that suck if we all missed out on eternal salvation because we were obbsessed with the glowing phosphors in our computer/TV screens.
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Old 07-08-2003, 04:43 AM   #37 (permalink)
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The guy looks just like the pictures!!! It could be him!
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Old 07-10-2003, 03:49 AM   #38 (permalink)
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Here's the answer according to Islam, taken from islam-online.net - Personally I think it's a bunch of bullshit.

[question] - What are the signs of the coming of the Antichrist Dajjal? Are there any signs whatsoever of the coming of the Prophet Jesus, peace and blessings be upon him? If so, what are those signs? Name of Mufti Islam Online Fatwa Committee Content of Reply
Wa`laykum As-Salaamu Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh.

[reply] - In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.

All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

Dear sister in Islam, thank you very much for having confidence in us and we implore Allah to guide you to the straight path and to strengthen your steps along the path of truth, Amen.

Answering a similar question on the characteristics of the Antichrist, Sheikh Muhammad `Ali Al-Hanooti, member of the Fiqh council, states the following:

“The appearance of Al-Massih Ad-Dajjal or Antichrist is part of big trials that would herald the end of the world. All of the Prophets of Allah, may Allah be pleased with them all, gave warning to their peoples against the Antichrist. He is called Dajjal because he is a liar and called Massiah because he happens to be one-eyed. He will claim Lordship (Rububiyyah) by performing many miraculous acts to attract people.

The Dajjal has a writing on his face between his eyes that reads “Kafir” or disbeliever. Also, he can travel very fast and will have with him something that looks similar to heaven and similar to hell. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, says, "His fire is a Paradise and his Paradise is a Hell-Fire.". It stands to reason that the Antichrist will seek help from the Satans.

Part of the trials that will follow the appearance of the Antichrist is that by ordering for rain, it’ll rains, by ordering for the earth to be covered by plantation and plants, it will be, he will make all the beasts to follow him; by ordering the buried treasures to be uncovered, they will be brought forth to the surface.”

Shedding more light on the issue, we would like to cite for you this Fatwa, which we find relevant to this point:

“Indeed, the appearance of Antichrist is confirmed by authentic Hadiths from the Prophetic Sunnah, but no one knows the exact time of his appearance as it is part of the Unseen and knowing the Unseen is something related to Allah alone.

A Muslim should seek refuge with Allah from the tribulations in general, and from the torments of the Antichrist in particular; he should pray to Allah, openly and in secret, to help him remain steadfast both in this world and in the Hereafter.

Here are some few facts about the Antichrist:

1. “We believe that every Prophet has warned his people about this person.


2. The Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, stated that mankind will never experience a greater trial than that of the trial of the Antichrist.

3. He will make his emergence from Iran or its precincts.

4. A large number of his followers will be the Jews.

5. When he comes, he will come at a time when there is famine and starvation and war, and he will amplify his authority by manipulating people because of the great need of food and peace on the earth at that time.

6. Before he arrives, the earth will suffer from an unprecedented drought that will cause vegetables and cattle to die off. At this time, he will come with huge amounts of food and water and other means.

7. He will first declare that he is a prophet, and then eventually claim Divinity. Those who accept him as their lord, he will cause rain to fall on their land and supply with food and other essentials. Those who reject him, he will forbid rain from falling on their land and will prevent food and other means from being supplied to them.

8. His powers will be so great that he will rule the earth for a few years. Then when he gathers an army together to fight against those that reject him, Jesus, peace and blessings be upon him, will descend and eventually destroy him.

9. Jesus will unite the world under one Government, one religion.(Of course we Muslims believe that he will unite the world under the banner of Islam).

10. Jesus will live on the earth for a time, marry, have children and then eventually die a natural death.”

The above ten facts are excerpted with slight modifications from this URL:

http://www.unsolvedmysteries.com/usm172058.html

As for the issue of the second coming of Jesus, peace and blessings be upon him, as well as the signs that coincide with his return, we would like to cite for you the following fatwa issued by Dr. Muzzamil Siddiqui, president of the Islamic Society of North America. The Fatwa goes as follows:

“Imam Al-Bukhari and Imam Muslim quoted the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, as saying: “Soon the Son of Mary will descend among you as a just judge. He will break the cross, kill the pig, remove the Jizyah and the wealth will overflow to the extent that people will get disinterested in it, and until the prostration (al-Sajdah) will be better than the world and whatever is in it. Then Abu Hurayrah said, 'Read if you wish, 'And there is none of the People of the Book but must believe in him before his death and on the Day of Judgment he will be a witness on them." (An-Nisa' 4:159)

The second coming of Jesus is clearly a well- established fact, according to the Qur'an and authentic Sunnah. We Muslims should not have any doubt about this matter. The Hadiths make it very clear that:

1. Jesus' coming will be "a sign of the approaching Day of Judgment". If any one makes a claim of being the Messi`ah during the approach of the Day of Judgment, neither in his life nor soon after him, then it is proved that he was a false pretender and not a true Messi`ah.

2. Jesus will not come to add or subtract anything from Islam. He will not claim himself to be a new Prophet or Messenger. He will not even lead a prayer of Muslims, he will follow in prayers the Imam of Muslims.

3. Jesus will fight the Dajjal and will kill him near Jerusalem.
We do not know when Jesus will come, but he will surely come. It is important to believe whatever Allah has said in the Qur'an and whatever is explained in the authentic Sunnah of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him.”

Dearest sister, Do keep in touch!

May Allah guide you to the straight path and direct you to that which pleases Him, Amen.

Allah Almighty knows best.
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Old 07-10-2003, 01:02 PM   #39 (permalink)
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"Modern Christianity"

As a Christian, I believe Christ is returning.

But, I just read this thread and was frustrated by what it revealed. One of the posts refered to "Modern Christianity" and some perceived negative opinions about Christianity. I will not deny that in SOME Christian circles a lot of what was written had a grain of truth, but it does not define the entire religion.

Comments:

1) "Modern Christianity is all about making people conform to a "Moral Standard" that Christ himself never imposed on anyone."

> Christ may never have imposed it as condemningly as some churches, but he definately taught the "Moral Standard" as asked His followers to strive toward it. But he knew we would all fail. It's the journey and heart that matters. Many churches live by this. I attend a conservative pentacostal church, but everyone is welcome and we have curious gang members, retired bikers, and more disfunctional families than you can shake a stick at. The difference is they are striving for the goal and lives are changing with the Word.

2) Moneychangers in the temple and "Give to Caesar what is Caesars" have absolutely nothing to do with giving to your church. The moneychangers were selling "offerings" to the people and cutting profit and the Caesar scripture was Jesus teaching the people that they had to submit to their governing authorities by paying taxes to Caesar. Most churches do not do the pulpit pounding, shame filled, giving and my experience has been that those churches a) don't last long, b) become extremely unhealthy, materialistic and human focused.

3) I have not disagreement with the fact that many attrocities have been done in the name of religion...whether it is the crusades and slavery in the name of Christianity, the invasions and conquests of Mohammad in the name of Allah, or genocide of a race of people in the name of some other religion. Human-nature sucks but it is definately not solely a characteristic of Modern Christianity...
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Old 07-10-2003, 03:50 PM   #40 (permalink)
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Amen to GrumpyCoder!
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