04-10-2004, 08:32 PM | #1 (permalink) |
Dumb all over...a little ugly on the side
Location: In the room where the giant fire puffer works, and the torture never stops.
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"Say baby do you wanna lay down by me"
TOMMY THE CAT
"I remember as it were a meal ago" Said Tommy the Cat as he reeled back to clear whatever foreign matter may have nestled its way into his mighty throat. Many a fat alley rat had met its demise while staring point blank down the cavernous barrel of this awesome prowling machine. Truly a wonder of nature this urban predator. Tommy the cat had many a story to tell, But it was a rare occasion such as this that he did. "She came slidin' down the alleyway like butter drippin' off a hot biscuit. The aroma, the mean scent, was enough to arouse suspicion in even the oldest of Tigers that hung around the hot spot in those days. The sight was beyond belief. Many a head snapped for double - even triple - takes as this vivacious feline made her her way into the delta of the alleyway where the most virile of the young tabbys were known to hang out. They hung in droves. Such a multitude of masculinity could only be found in one place... And that was O'malley's Alley. The air was thick with cat calls (no pun intended), But not even a muscle in her neck did twitch as she sauntered up into the heart of the alley. She knew what she wanted. She was lookin' for that stud bull, the he cat. And that was me. Tommy the Cat is my name and I say unto thee... "Say baby do you wanna lay down by me" I love this tune. Tom Waits has such a cool way with words.
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He's the best, of course, of all the worst. Some wrong been done, he done it first. -fz I jus' want ta thank you...falettinme...be mice elf...agin... |
04-10-2004, 09:04 PM | #2 (permalink) |
green
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Tom Waits is the man.
My personal favorite song of his is Step Right Up.... i can't find the lyrics anywhere though. On the new Modest Mouse cd, Good News For People Who Love Bad News, there's a song called This Devil's Workday which sounds very heavily Waits-influenced (minus the signature Waits voice of course). It's very good.
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Your arms are broken! |
04-10-2004, 09:26 PM | #3 (permalink) |
In Your Dreams
Location: City of Lights
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You know that's a Primus song that Tom Waits "speaks" in, right?
That said, I love both Primus and Waits. I actually heard a random song by this techno artist (Rob Dougan) that must have been Waits influenced, as it sounded (almost) exactly like Waits. Found it online (legally): Here Check out Drinking Song. |
04-11-2004, 06:33 AM | #4 (permalink) |
Minion of the scaléd ones
Location: Northeast Jesusland
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I <i>just</i> listened to this!
This is one of the best similies in modern music: "She came slidin' down the alleyway like butter drippin' off a hot biscuit." Kinda Ray Chandler meets Aunt Jemimah.
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Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life. |
04-11-2004, 06:35 AM | #5 (permalink) | |
Minion of the scaléd ones
Location: Northeast Jesusland
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Quote:
Everyone's a winner, bargains galore That's right, you too can be the proud owner Of the quality goes in before the name goes on One-tenth of a dollar, one-tenth of a dollar, we got service after sales You need perfume? we got perfume, how 'bout an engagement ring? Something for the little lady, something for the little lady, Something for the little lady, hmm Three for a dollar We got a year-end clearance, we got a white sale And a smoke-damaged furniture, you can drive it away today Act now, act now, and receive as our gift, our gift to you They come in all colors, one size fits all No muss, no fuss, no spills, you're tired of kitchen drudgery Everything must go, going out of business, going out of business Going out of business sale Fifty percent off original retail price, skip the middle man Don't settle for less How do we do it? how do we do it? volume, volume, turn up the volume Now you've heard it advertised, don't hesitate Don't be caught with your drawers down, Don't be caught with your drawers down You can step right up, step right up That's right, it filets, it chops, it dices, slices, Never stops, lasts a lifetime, mows your lawn And it mows your lawn and it picks up the kids from school It gets rid of unwanted facial hair, it gets rid of embarrassing age spots, It delivers a pizza, and it lengthens, and it strengthens And it finds that slipper that's been at large under the chaise lounge for several weeks And it plays a mean Rhythm Master, It makes excuses for unwanted lipstick on your collar And it's only a dollar, step right up, it's only a dollar, step right up 'Cause it forges your signature If not completely satisfied, mail back unused portion of product For complete refund of price of purchase Step right up Please allow thirty days for delivery, don't be fooled by cheap imitations You can live in it, live in it, laugh in it, love in it Swim in it, sleep in it, Live in it, swim in it, laugh in it, love in it Removes embarrassing stains from contour sheets, that's right And it entertains visiting relatives, it turns a sandwich into a banquet Tired of being the life of the party? Change your shorts, change your life, change your life Change into a nine-year-old Hindu boy, get rid of your wife, And it walks your dog, and it doubles on sax Doubles on sax, you can jump back Jack, see you later alligator See you later alligator And it steals your car It gets rid of your gambling debts, it quits smoking It's a friend, and it's a companion, And it's the only product you will ever need Follow these easy assembly instructions it never needs ironing Well it takes weights off hips, bust, thighs, chin, midriff, Gives you dandruff, and it finds you a job, it is a job And it strips the phone company free take ten for five exchange, And it gives you denture breath And you know it's a friend, and it's a companion And it gets rid of your traveler's checks It's new, it's improved, it's old-fashioned Well it takes care of business, never needs winding, Never needs winding, never needs winding Gets rid of blackheads, the heartbreak of psoriasis, Christ, you don't know the meaning of heartbreak, buddy, C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon 'Cause it's effective, it's defective, it creates household odors, It disinfects, it sanitizes for your protection It gives you an erection, it wins the election Why put up with painful corns any longer? It's a redeemable coupon, no obligation, no salesman will visit your home We got a jackpot, jackpot, jackpot, prizes, prizes, prizes, all work guaranteed How do we do it, how do we do it, how do we do it, how do we do it We need your business, we're going out of business We'll give you the business Get on the business end of our going-out-of-business sale Receive our free brochure, free brochure Read the easy-to-follow assembly instructions, batteries not included Send before midnight tomorrow, terms available, Step right up, step right up, step right up You got it buddy: the large print giveth, and the small print taketh away Step right up, you can step right up, you can step right up C'mon step right up (Get away from me kid, you bother me...) Step right up, step right up, step right up, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon Step right up, you can step right up, c'mon and step right up, C'mon and step right up</center></i> Of course, the lyrics change every time he sings it...
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Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life. Last edited by Tophat665; 04-11-2004 at 06:37 AM.. |
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baby, lay, wanna |
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