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-   -   my first poetry post... (https://thetfp.com/tfp/tilted-literature/97690-my-first-poetry-post.html)

pandafaye 11-19-2005 04:09 PM

my first poetry post...
 
Perhaps I'll begin with a haiku:

Gratification
Oily wet between our legs
Burning like a coal



And some freeform:

fumble, fumble
words without meaning
seep through my lips
and call themselves verse
tit tat
of diversion
crawling into my mouth
overwhelming my brain
and spewing its false credits
out the tips
of these nimble
fingers

tecoyah 11-20-2005 03:18 AM

Gratification
Oily wet between our legs
Burning like a coal


OK.....Now I'm all horny......Damn

Sultana 11-20-2005 07:42 AM

I like them both, a lot. The second one is especially cool, I like the idea of poetry going through the mouth, to the brain instead of the more typical vision of brain to mouth.

HedwigStrange 11-21-2005 09:03 PM

I really like the haiku. In other words... it made me tingly. However, is "oily" really the right word there? Coals and oil are kind of a weird combination of imagery.


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