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-   -   Shadows of my soul - Poetry Chapter One. (https://thetfp.com/tfp/tilted-literature/79559-shadows-my-soul-poetry-chapter-one.html)

Amnesia620 12-25-2004 11:36 PM

Shadows of my soul - Poetry Chapter One.
 
Hello All. Everything posted under my name is original (copyrighted) work by me. Some of it may be good, some of it may suck. It's completely me. Take it or leave it...but at least try to see the beauty within it. Thanks.

Amnesia620 12-25-2004 11:36 PM

Anxious
 
Today I poured my soul,

I write my deepest hope,

Everytime I look to you,

Without you I can't cope.



Yesterday I dreamt far away,

Lost in thought until today,

Unable to hear your voice,

Forced decision without choice.



Now I pray to all above,

For no absence of true love,

Protect me in all I do,

So that I may return to you.

Amnesia620 12-25-2004 11:37 PM

Fairytales of Fiction
 
We build castles in the sky,
Then others tear them down,
They grow tired of the promises,
And burn them to the ground.

Many fairytale pages are written,
And then they're ripped into shreds,
All of those dreams fading away,
Now unraveled like worn-out threads.

Some of us have become tired,
Of all the fake smiles and lies,
A castle is not a home,
When it's beauty is a disguise.

So, the next time you forget,
Or find you just can't make time,
Someone may ruin your Castle,
And be unpunished for the crime.

Their are queens who await in towers,
for their far away Kings to return,
Matches stay lit while thoughts become worse,
Ready to walk away while their castles burn.

Amnesia620 12-25-2004 11:38 PM

Yearning
 
Light shining through glass of a machine running constantly,
words typed onto the screen meaning so much,
loved professed with burning desire of a man unknown,
an inner ache of a world unexplored, yearning for his touch.


Darkness envelopes me with arms of strength and silence,
as the screen has gone dark but the thought of you remains,
lying beneath the covers, my imagination takes over,
and the heat of passion overwhelming me, runs throughout my veins.


As my imagination becomes my momentary reality,
and the waves of orgasmic pleasure overwhelm me,
our moments end with the three words of true devotion,
our souls connected with simultaneous climax, setting us free.

Amnesia620 12-25-2004 11:40 PM

Expectant
 
The waiting of the true love is the longest...but oh!
Patience they cry as she burns slowly inside herself.
She seethes with ache and anger at the unjustice of it all.
When will her true love come forth and take her pain?
Away, diminishing, extinguishing the ache and anger only he can do.

Amnesia620 12-25-2004 11:41 PM

Love's Own Poison
 
As she lay on the satin sheets surrounded by wealth and respect, she wonders, "What do I really own?"
She is answered with nothing. The beauty of riches has gained her nothing but a name well spoken, one whom everyone's heard of. But they whom have heard it shall die one day as she is doing now, and the name like torn shadows will be once forgotten as they were once learned. Like the poison she was given in secret to take her life so soon.
And as she lay there, drowning in her new found misery and pain, she doesn't realize that the love she once gave before accepting the one who gave her riches is still there. The man who accepted that love before her greedy selection to be with one who gave her wealth silently watches over her, with tears in his eyes...each tear a memory.
And where, oh where, is the man who gave her the wealth?

Laying in bed with the cook's eighteen year old daughter, speaking the same words of devotion and desire he once said to his dying wife. The poison she was secretly given...on his fingertips.

Amnesia620 12-25-2004 11:41 PM

Dependent
 
"I love you" he spoke, as he rushed his seed inside her. She smiled, knowing the words were in the midst of lust and passion and were not spoken from the heart.
The days go on. She is now the life support of her flower, a tiny child. She does not see the man anymore, for he claims to never have said the three fragile words to her.
He brags to ignorant friends of the joys of being "free". No extra weight to weigh him down. The responsibility is on her. Ha! He laughs.
Through pain and passion, the child is born and sadly, the woman dies. The man who once boasted, is now the sole caretaker of this tiny human life. Once
finacially steady, now working from day to day to survive.

Amnesia620 12-25-2004 11:43 PM

Like the one just above this...some of these are not the best...some were written many moons ago...some just recently...some when I was a teenager...bear with me.

Amnesia620 12-25-2004 11:50 PM

Footsteps
 
I walk in the night,
alone with silence to guide me,
and I cry my salty tears,
for I have no one.
How long must I walk till I find the one,
and be held in his arms at night,
with tender words to lull me to sleep,
and my heart at rest.
How many tears must I cry,
before my eyes dry,
like deserts of sand,
needy of water like I am of love.
My heartbeat is all I hear,
alone in the silent night,
and it has no echo,
to soothe me.
Then like the rhythm of my heartbeats,
I hear footsteps behind me,
only to see a heart like mine,
to share my passion.

Amnesia620 12-25-2004 11:51 PM

Never
 
I love you,
he whispers in the darkest night,
as he rushes his seed inside her,
sadly she believes this is true love.
Betrayed,
she tells herself as she cries with anger,
as he pretends not to know her,
and her body swells with the seed inside her.
Damn Him,
she swears as the pain becomes overwhelming,
and the tiny child is born,
to take her pain.
The pain of her new life,
so euphoric in itself,
makes her cry,
at her childish anger.
Never,
she swears,
he will never know how it feels,
to give life as I have.

Amnesia620 12-25-2004 11:52 PM

Sweet Silence
 
Whispers in the night,
alone with my thoughts,
I begin to think of you,
and I smile.
Remembering the gentle kisses,
and being held all night long,
happiness is in your arms,
and that is where I am.
In my thoughts,
I am happiest,
for I am with you,
in Sweet Silence.

Amnesia620 12-26-2004 12:07 AM

Here I stand at a mirror,
reflecting as I stare,
I'm trying to see,
why you don't care.

Why am I forced,
to turn my heart away,
when I've grown comfortable,
with you right here to stay.

How am I obsessed,
when what I feel is love,
I'm forced to let go,
now that you've given a shove.

You act like it's nothing,
and walk away unabashed,
my heart is in pieces,
my confidence is trashed.

I dislike you yet I love you,
I'm so torn inside,
Can't stop feeling uneasy,
Suspicious that you lied.

Amnesia620 12-26-2004 12:23 AM

Driven
 
Black leather clasped,
possessive of my neck,
a ring of sorts,
keeping me in check.

Long black skirt falls,
just short of the floor,
tight bodice embracing,
my eyes upon the door.

I speak when spoken to,
given pleasure when I'm good,
I'm vowed to my Master,
and do as a good slave should.

My Master finds me beautiful
enticing in inexplicable ways,
pain is soothed with gentleness,
setting my body ablaze.

My captivity is my servitude,
given by permissiveness,
his touch is control,
my body is an altar to bless.

K-Wise 12-26-2004 08:40 AM

I enjoyed reading all of these.

Quote:

Some of us are tired,
Of all the fake smiles and lies,
A castle is not a home,
When it's beauty is a disguise.
I especially like that stanza right there. Wonderful words. I see you've only just begun too. Hope I can keep up haha.

Asta!!

Amnesia620 12-26-2004 08:42 AM

Jester&Echo
 
** Eternally Rest In Peace
My Beloved Ferret, Echo
March 2001 - September 2005
We'll see you again one day
Reunited at The Rainbow Bridge**

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*

Furry little face,
wet tiny little nose,
hanging from your hammock,
this is how it goes.

Hide and go seek,
tag you're it,
these are the games they love,
as I patiently sit.

Kisses and wiggles,
barking and sighs,
getting into something,
are your ultimate highs.

Food and water,
ferretone as a treat,
the things you love,
can't quite be beat.

The biggest of yawns,
on the bed or the floor,
a romp around the room,
is always what you adore.

Never passes a laugh,
without Joy behind,
I love you little fuzzies,
I'm in love with your kind.

Misunderstood and disliked,
such happiness you bring,
you're two little humans,
and not just some "thing".

My two ferrets of Joy,
little partners in crime,
I hope you stay with me,
til the end of time.

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo With love to Jester and Echo xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo Rest In Peace, My Sweet Echo - 09.29.05 xoxoxoxxoxoxoxox

Amnesia620 12-26-2004 08:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by K-Wise
I enjoyed reading all of these.



I especially like that stanza right there. Wonderful words. I see you've only just begun too. Hope I can keep up haha.

Asta!!

Thank you, K-Wise!! When I find my folder of written poetry I will have much more to post. :) Until then, I will write a new poem here and there or post and old one or two I have...hope you keep enjoying them. I'm not as good as some people I know, anymore, but I do have my moments. :lol:

K-Wise 12-26-2004 09:10 AM

Ferrets totally rock. Liked that poem too. I'll try and find time to read as many as I can if not all of your poems yo. Keep em comin homie I'll get to em.

Asta!! :thumbsup:

Amnesia620 12-26-2004 11:16 PM

Thank you! I will do my best.

Amnesia620 12-26-2004 11:25 PM

In Search Of
 
Two and a half years,
your loss, you jerk,
you threw it all away,
don't want to make it work.

You said you loved me,
such a believable lie,
cold and indifferent,
so unwilling to try.

Now I'm left with the pain,
shocked at the way you acted,
suspicious of your reasoning,
wondering who else you've attracted.

Fighting my sadness and torment,
pushing you out of my mind,
looking for my true "soulmate",
unsure of what I will find.

Amnesia620 12-26-2004 11:30 PM

Gem
 
Glistening, glittery,
shining like new,
rare, priceless,
only a few.

Soft, warm and gentle,
like skin made of fleece,
neverending and eternal,
feelings never to cease.

Dark, lonely, empty,
no word, warning or note,
uncertain, panicked, sinking,
struggle to stay afloat.

Amnesia620 12-26-2004 11:31 PM

The above one is unfinished...More to come...

K-Wise 12-26-2004 11:48 PM

Yes good stuff but it's "threw" as in "You threw it all away" :thumbsup:

Asta!!

Amnesia620 12-27-2004 06:47 PM

Thanks, K-Wise, I posted that just before I passed out...

minyn 12-28-2004 09:02 AM

Can relate well to two and a half years. a universal stnaza that many of us want to say to some jerk =)

Seer666 12-28-2004 09:36 PM

Good stuff. Glad to see you posting hon. I can't help but wonder if I just might now the..... insperation.... behind the "Black leather clasped" poem......
Hope you got a good collar for when I come back home;)

Amnesia620 12-29-2004 04:13 PM

The name of it is "Driven", Seer...I wouldn't have read the book if it wasn't for you, so perhaps you ARE my inspiration for that poem...

K-Wise 12-29-2004 04:51 PM

So you two guys know each other eh? Cool.

Asta!!

Amnesia620 12-31-2004 01:18 AM

Yeah, K-wise, Seer and I have known eachother 5 years now...

Amnesia620 01-08-2005 12:26 PM

From The Outside In
 
A tear rolls down your cheek,
pain so deep you can't speak,
anger is the fire behind your eyes,
you're so sick and tired of the lies.

Your lips are so tightly pursed,
his name once loved is now cursed,
you hands gripped in fists of rage,
you're just wishing he'd act his age.

You walk alone so many nights,
you're so tired of all these fights,
you want desire, respect and trust,
not just flirting, sex and lust.

But yet, you walk back to him each time,
giving in, no punishment for his crime,
showing him no backbone, its okay,
not brave enough to run, so you choose to stay.

Here I am, your friend not foe,
I listen to you, your plight, your woe,
However, what is it that you fear,
To my advice you turn a deaf ear.

You're stuck here to bitch, complain and moan,
the way out - you've already been shown,
be brave - I don't have a loser as a friend,
be strong and put this mess to an end.

tecoyah 01-09-2005 06:16 AM

I rather enjoy your work....well worded and clear in message.

Thanx

Amnesia620 01-16-2005 01:18 AM

Thank you very much. You've made my day :D

amonkie 01-16-2005 11:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Amnesia620
I walk in the night,
alone with silence to guide me,
and I cry my salty tears,
for I have no one.
How long must I walk till I find the one,
and be held in his arms at night,
with tender words to lull me to sleep,
and my heart at rest.
How many tears must I cry,
before my eyes dry,
like deserts of sand,
needy of water like I am of love.
My heartbeat is all I hear,
alone in the silent night,
and it has no echo,
to soothe me.
Then like the rhythm of my heartbeats,
I hear footsteps behind me,
only to see a heart like mine,
to share my passion.


Maybe it's just because I'm sick and it's really late, but I read this and I got goosebumps ALL over. the "deserts of sand, needy of water" really hit home since I live in the desert. Thanks for sharing so much of you!

Amnesia620 01-22-2005 02:25 PM

:D Thank you Amonkie. I live in the desert also, so we both understand the barren world in which we reside. I'm sure there is more to come soon.

Amnesia620 01-27-2005 04:19 AM

Well, I wish I could find it all but since most of my stuff is packed up in storage...time will only tell...however, I'm about to post some that I found just recently...

Amnesia620 01-27-2005 12:38 PM

What the fuh...?
 
Whining, Nagging,
B*tching, Complaining,
Pissin', Moaning,
Softly Groaning.

Throw a look,
Huff and sigh,
I'm beginning to think,
a computer stole my guy.

Fidget and fuss,
scratch an itch,
think and wonder,
Am I being a B*tch?

Shower, don't dress,
brush out my hair,
stand their naked,
nope, he doesn't care.

Throw on some clothes,
give up and quit,
find something else to do,
so tired of this sh*t.

Organize and move,
clean and repair,
I do all the work,
while he just sits there.

My dear beloved guy,
this is about to end,
I want the other A**hole back,
who I chose as my boyfriend.

Amnesia620 01-27-2005 12:47 PM

Choices
 
Can I do this or can I not?
Is he the person that I thought?

Will his addiction tear us apart?
Can his love mend my broken heart?

Will his laughter fill my ears?
Or his smile dry my tears?

So uncertain, here I stand,
left without a helping hand.

I fight this battle I see each day,
taking all of my friends away.

Do I give in and be with them?
Give up being clean, have it condemned?

That life a struggle I care not lead,
I try to turn a deaf-ear as they beg and plead.

Future in question, won't leave them behind,
If I choose to follow, the sacrifice is my mind.

Amnesia620 01-27-2005 12:58 PM

Silently Weeping
 
Poorly put together,
simple pages of time,
no sense, no answer,
no reason nor rhyme.

Worn pages and torn corners,
blank pages without ink,
void of words and feeling,
no time to question or think.

One rose upon a small grave,
a child's new place to belong,
pages ripped from a book,
is a voice without a song.

Seer666 01-27-2005 02:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Amnesia620
Whining, Nagging,
B*tching, Complaining,
Pissin', Moaning,
Softly Groaning.

Throw a look,
Huff and sigh,
I'm beginning to think,
a computer stole my guy.

HAHAHAHAHA!!! That is great!!! I love it!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Amnesia620
My dear beloved guy,
this is about to end,
I want the other A**hole back,
who I chose as my boyfriend.

:hmm: Something you're trying to tell me?

Amnesia620 01-27-2005 08:51 PM

LOL. Having a paranoid day, love?? ;) Inquiring minds want to know. I would love to hear your take on that poem, Seer.

If I am trying to tell you something, what would it be?

I am, however, very happy that you found the first part of the poem to be funny. I re-read that part and laugh, still, everytime. :)

Amnesia620 01-31-2005 01:21 AM

Identically Opposite
 
Amazing grace should never be played at a wedding,
for her day of light should hold no sorrow,
yet she remains in darkness everyday before that time,
a bitter bride held in the eternal torment of tomorrow.

White train of memories, a veil covering inner beauty,
a dream cursed, continually unfulfilled, tried and true,
waiting each day to fall in love and forget sorrow,
an honor to wear things old, new, borrowed and blue.

...to be continued...

amonkie 01-31-2005 02:21 PM

That's so true about amazing grace - makes me wonder if there's irony in having a funeral march played as a wedding processional/recession. As always, love your stuff :)

Amnesia620 01-31-2005 09:31 PM

Thank you, Amonkie. It's nice to know people enjoy my work...I've often wondered if I'm any good. :)

Amnesia620 02-03-2005 08:28 AM

Disgusting
 
Foul, Gross, Vile,
This isn't worth the while,
Why did I read that story,
It's Reality is really gory.

Actions are so wrong,
not thought about long,
sanity is questioned here,
truth of the post is unclear.

And now we all stand queasy,
discussing this isn't very easy,
how is concern to be shown,
when the truth of it is unknown?

Please don't ever post it again,
not the who, what, why or when,
the post topic needs to be changed,
illness will spread by the deranged.

With this poem I write, I walk away,
hoping to God you see another day,
in your presence I feel I want to flee,
I want nothing that is you around me.

Amnesia620 02-04-2005 10:35 PM

Without Mommy
 
Mommy! Mommy!
I'm scared! I need you!
Why does my daddy answer?
Why only him and not you?

My mommy's gone away,
I think she's forgotten me,
Maybe she'll come back,
Everyday I wait to see.

Daddy has tried to explain to me,
he says that my mommy's very sick,
I pretend to know what he means,
but I don't know words like "alcoholic".

I am too little to get it,
that's what Daddy said,
as I stare at him blankly,
he tucks me in bed.

Each day I look out our window,
imagining her in our portico,
Mommy walks up to our front door,
any minute now Mommy will show.

I miss you much more each day,
memories are trapped in the past,
Daddy is taking good care of me,
all of our time goes by very fast.

Mommy, why are you an alcoholic?
Why does it keep you far away?
Don't you love me anymore, Mommy?
When will you be home to stay?

So each night Daddy tucks me in,
we say a prayer before goodnight,
Daddy always shows me lots of love,
and he knows to leave on the hall light.

My daddy tries to explain,
that Mommy is not well,
I don't say anything to him,
I won't come out of my shell.

All I think about is Mommy,
think about her all day long,
she'll be home tomorrow,
I know I can remain strong.

I still don't get what Daddy says,
I don't know why Mommy's sick,
and I won't ever understand,
a word as big as "alcoholic".

Amnesia620 02-05-2005 12:44 PM

The one above, you can also find on the Writing Challenge #3 thread. I just posted it here so it's added to my collection. :) Hope every enjoys...any requests? ;) lol

tecoyah 02-05-2005 04:27 PM

I am saddened by the above poem...........it is heartwrenching.
Fantastic work...as expected

Amnesia620 02-05-2005 10:41 PM

The poem from the eyes of a 5 year old is totally what I remember at that age...I am glad that it touched you so deeply though, Tecoyah. I have a renewed pride in my work because of you and a few other TFP members who seem to love my poetry...

Once again, you know how to brighten someones day. :D

Amnesia620 02-10-2005 08:50 PM

You,
have the audacity,
to obsess,
yet I'm neurotic?

You,
have the gall,
to be audacious,
yet I'm impudent?

You,
dare to deceive,
to say I'm false,
yet you lie to me?

You,
have the nerve,
to say I'm too clingy,
yet you can't live without me?

Amnesia620 02-10-2005 11:38 PM

One dark summer night,
way back in the year 1983,
looking at the sky as best friends,
here I chill with Tom beside me.

In the morning my life will change,
my daughter will come to stay,
I've been granted full custody,
my life will start a whole new day.

Now in view is a shooting star,
unique in size and it's very bright,
how lucky are we to see this,
on this very dark and quiet night.

Suddenly it breaks apart in two,
never guessing this was our sign,
each half going in it's own direction,
Tom watched his and I watched mine.

Fast-forward time about 3 or 4 years,
we live far apart, don't speak everyday,
I work a lot and care for my daughter,
touch is lost, yet still a lot to say.

One night I fall asleep in my bedroom,
I begin to dream of Tom, so vividly,
so happy to be driving with him in his car,
rockin' out to the music of AC/DC.

My best friend slips from wake to sleep,
helpless as his passenger I can only sit there,
Tom eventually falls completely asleep as he drives,
an unfortunate event I was chosen to share.


The road ahead shows an altered path of safety,
I can't change our course as we're about to crash,
a large oak is the end of our true and certain path,
I have no time to think as it all happens in a flash.

Suddenly upright in bed, extremely unnerved,
realizing it's a dream, but I'm not reassured,
can't believe it was only a dream and not reality,
so clear was what I saw as were the sounds I heard.

A few days pass and then I'm given the news,
I need to contact Tom's family immediately,
and when I call up to his sister the worst is said,
my dream the few nights before showed a true reality.

Here I sit alone next to your headstone,
amazed at the fact about AC/DC that played,
Hells Bells playing on the tape in the car,
and was the same song that my dream portrayed.

Now I marvel at the memories of the night in 1983,
the purpose in that star we saw a message was hid,
who knew your death was foretold in that moment,
when your part of the star burned out before mine did.

Amnesia620 02-11-2005 01:23 AM

And now for something completely different....

I've got an excellent idea! Let's change the subject!

Amnesia620 02-11-2005 01:38 AM

Beep.bop.ding.bang.
Techno music my speakers sang.
Clink.jingle.ring.ding.
This is the song they sing.

Whizz.Vroom.Doink.Pop.
Infected Mushroom just won't stop.
Zoop.bleep.bong.boom.
Awesome music fills the room.

Coil.Boing.Whirl.Whee.
Electronic music stirs inside of me.
Grind.Zap.Clip.Purr.
My thoughts are such a blur.

Zot.Zip.Bat.Ditt.Ditt.
I just can't get enough of this sh*t.
Whip.Pang.Grizz.Tink.Grend.
Too bad this is the end.

Amnesia620 02-11-2005 01:40 AM

Ok, the one above this is bizarre, I'll admit...some are old, like I said...some are new...again, everyone, try to see the beauty in each one. Thanks.

Amnesia620 02-11-2005 02:43 AM

Out Of Reach
 
Hello again Mr. Operator,
Can you please connect my line,
I hope you are doing well,
yes, today I'm doing just fine.

Please don't ignore me today, sir,
I really must get through,
tomorrow is worse than yesterday,
I just don't what to do.

No, today is fine, Mr. Operator,
I said tomorrow is worse, not today,
connect me as quick as you can,
please listen to what I have to say.

Sir, I need to get through right now,
to prevent tomorrow from its start,
you see, if I don't I'll lose someone,
a person very close to my heart.

Will you be quick now and do it in a rush,
Yes, I'm impatient in my hasty demand,
hurry, I can't explain right this very second,
even though I'm sure you'd never understand.

C'mon now, just put them on,
I don't need to explain to you why,
As soon as they're on the phone,
I can warn them that they're about to die.

Finally, thank you for your help,
no, no, no, it can't be too late,
I've attempted to alter the inevitable,
but there's no persuading Fate.

I only wonder could I have saved your life,
if I reached you just five minutes before,
can I prevent your death from happening,
or would I just prolong it for five minutes more?

Hey, Mr. Operator, try to connect me now,
rewind Time and lets change the end,
I'm sorry, I know we can get it right this time,
I'm just not ready to lose another friend.

tecoyah 02-11-2005 04:01 AM

I developed a song in my head about halfway through that last one......definately lends itself to rythm.

Quite nice....thank you

Amnesia620 02-11-2005 04:13 AM

Those were just thrown out there. I'm about to get into my storage and dig through all of my old folders...the classic stuff is soon to come.

Amnesia620 02-11-2005 04:16 AM

LOL. Mr. Operator makes me think of Hey, Mr. DJ now that I re-read it...lol...oh my...

ironmaiden7o7 02-11-2005 06:25 AM

Your poems are great, I enjoyed reading them. I couldn't help but to notice the originality. Have you ever been published? You should try publishing a book, you definitely have talent.

Amnesia620 02-11-2005 10:30 AM

Thank you, Ironmaiden (awesome name, by the way).

You really think I have talent? I'm very flattered, honestly. I've often thought of becoming a writer - not only in poetry but stories as well. Over the years, I've just felt I've lost my gift...perhaps I'm wrong. :) I never thought I would get such a positive response on my work but I'm very happy that I have. Thank you.

Amnesia620 02-11-2005 07:52 PM

Surreal Realm
 
Tarnished waters softly lap and sway,
liquid silver drifting under candy skies,
where tomorrow meets yesterday,
everything remains ignorant but wise.

Somewhere here leading nowhere there,
truthful deceit waits beyond those steps,
common secrets bottled in modest flair,
floating in stillness upon its watery depths.

Amnesia620 02-14-2005 01:36 AM

The poem above is posted on one of the writing challenges (#4 maybe?). A door, open, surrounded by water...

Amnesia620 02-18-2005 10:06 PM

I found this next one written on a napkin (now copied and filed with the other ones) from 2-5 years ago...I remember I wrote it at Denny's Restaurant one night...Enjoy. :)

Amnesia620 02-18-2005 11:01 PM

A Mind's Eye
 
A simple tear in the time continuum,
A secret glance at the future near,
trying to understand what will occur,
just moments before time will catch up.

What if this is really how it's supposed to be,
maybe we've all blocked out our abilities and gifts,
although unique, the one's like mine,
may once have a chance to alter the unknown.

Could we and should we interfere in that realm,
has a higher power given us this to use,
is it an intentional gift to strengthen our will,
or a method to test our resistance to insanity?

Some don't believe me when I speak,
others choose to not listen to me,
a few laugh and others pretend to care,
occasionally I'm tested, to see if I'm a liar.

How can you say to a person the words of "I love you",
when they have never met you before,
but you know them in ways unimaginable,
as you've spent long hours with them in many dreams.

It's scary to think there is someone,
out there who knows you intimately,
someone who is there to catch you,
long before you know you will fall.

Am I supposed to catch as many as I can,
or just let them fall into the darkness,
is there a reason for my secret sight,
or is it a gift without explanation?

When in love, how should I forewarn,
think only with my head, never my heart,
for too many mistakes made, I now regret,
while interlocked in moments of passionate love.

Insecure eyes stay blind by a heart questioned,
visions now eternally silenced by still lips,
too unique for a common thing like love,
should I dare a chance once more in time?

To attempt a chance always able to kill,
striving to love and be loved the same,
true sight explained, life lived once before,
perhaps silence is a present virtue.

Amnesia620 02-24-2005 03:39 AM

Unfortunately, I have not been able to get to my storage recently. All of my old work is trapped there so lately I've been trying to write new stuff. However, this is easier said that done but I'm working on it. I appreciate patience, none-the-less. :)

tecoyah 02-24-2005 05:27 AM

In the above work.....(I had to read it twice) the theme is amazing. You have managed to express the turmoil of a wandering soul in such a way to make the reader wonder if they are indeed, a part of your path. I found the underlying question intriguing.

It is rare to get to "Work at" reading poetic verse, and I enjoyed it very much.

Thank You

Amnesia620 02-24-2005 09:17 AM

Awesome, tecoyah. You're very welcome. Another poem is soon to be posted. This one is a bit of a pain but it has impressed one of my best friends (who happens to have a genius-level I.Q. and is being considered for MENSA). Hopefully, when finished in a few hours, it will still live up to his standards...believe me, they're pretty high. :lol:

Amnesia620 02-24-2005 11:03 PM

Alright, I'm about ready to post this next poem...it took me forever. I'm talking over 12 hours...I've been working on it all day. What I'm posting is the rough draft so it may change over the next week +

Hey, everyone, don't let this poem intimidate you or make you feel stupid...It's totally NOT meant to make anyone feel inferior. These are just the ideas I get and I run with them.
If anyone feels it is a good idea i will post the definitions to the words I used in it so you can have a better understanding, don't hesitate to PM me or post on here to ask me or speak your mind. :)

In the poem you will read about a stilted sentence: It's a sentence made of large/complex words where smaller/easy words could have been used to express the same meaning. This happens to be my Stilted Poem.

Again, a poems beauty is shown by the words used...this one is complex.

Amnesia620 02-24-2005 11:32 PM

Stilted In Tilted
 
I'm unable to imagine methods to your madness,
by evaluating actions and assessing their cost,
valuable moments in life you've eschewed and wasted,
many of those memories forever forgotten and lost.

I have not ascertained one single rhyme to your reason,
paronomastic languages are copiously punned,
all stilted sentences without subjects prove worthless,
any attempting linguist stays comprehensively stunned.

Cannot properly identify a spade as a spade,
objurgated opinions can create resentment,
becoming perplexed when you're abused and berated ,
avoid cavillous thoughts in fear of exacerbation.

Who am I to judge you as in a book by it's cover,
such duplicitous behaviour deserves revision,
every attempt to communicate is impious,
yet you're impervious to any threat of castigation.

Those ingrained with the perdurable mind over matter,
have blind faith in celestrial equivocations,
believing in what remains unrevealed and unseen ,
eternally resounding with vocal vindication.

Permanently reflecting that their old habits die hard,
some obscure and others in their own stage's limelight,
both lifestyles proportionate to their comfort level,
their soul's sins kept in secret will forever remain contrite.

Amnesia620 02-25-2005 01:30 AM

  • Eschewed- to shun or avoid; as something distasteful.
  • ascertained - acquired, received, obtained.
  • paronomastic - punned, word play.
  • stilted - a sentence or paragraph consisting of large or complex words whereas a sentence with small/easier words with the same meanings could have been used.
  • linguist - person who speaks languages fluently.
  • comprehension - to understand, pondering; knowledge concepts understood
  • perception - interpretation, recognition based on memory.
  • objurgated - to express strong disapproval of (See also: Cavillous, Exacerbate, Castigate)
  • perplex - to confuse, befuddle, stump.
  • cavillous - to disapprove, show or voice disapproval.
  • berated - censure severely or censure angrily.
  • stifled - to suppress (as in a laugh, cough or yawn) or cover; to hide or temporarily smother.
  • exacerbate - to make worse, to egg on, negatively increase
  • duplicitous - to be hypocritical; two-faced; deceitful, dishonest.
  • impious - lacking due respect, dutifulness.
  • reparation - to repair, fix or correct
  • impervious - incapable of being penetrated or affected.
  • oblivious - completely unaware of, to ignore
  • castigate - to inflict severe punishment or to critize severely.
  • purdurable - very durable, withstanding, long lasting
  • equivocation - a statement not literally false but that clearly avoids unpleasant truth, intentionally vague or ambiguous; false by means of vague/ambiguous language. "to beat around the bush"
  • vindication - the defense to justify a claim or deed, such as in evidence or argument.
  • proportionate - agreeable in amount, magnitude or degree; corresponding.
  • contrite - feeling or expressing pain or sorrow for sins or offenses.

tecoyah 02-25-2005 06:13 AM

I think I have seen this form before....interesting, and complex, but I dont see the pattern in this one. Enlighten me please.

Amnesia620 02-25-2005 11:01 AM

Finally finished with it.
 
Alright...sorry about that, everyone who read that poem when it was first posted. I posted it and I hadn't even edited/revised it. Should be better now. Let me know what you think of it.

Amnesia620 03-04-2005 01:46 PM

In dedication to the ferret: Mischeif RIP Apr.04
 
So docile were you,
on that first day I held,
in my arms you rested,
as if somehow compelled.

Thoughts back in time,
to another world's view,
none of us, it seemed,
could get enough of you.

Tiny secret windows,
once displayed your memoir,
each shown as priceless,
when pain seared your core.

Branded in sorrow,
pain fades in time,
bitter hearts still express,
value life lost in its prime.

Enlightened by memories,
and excitement in your breath,
dark silence changes quickly,
to avoid the sad face of death.

Then the time came,
to which you were sure to comply,
in sorrowful hope we cringed,
from our torment of "good-bye".

tecoyah 03-04-2005 02:03 PM

That was extremely well done.
Compelling message and wonderful use of Rhyme....which is rare.
In my experience most Rhyming poems seem contrived, and lose a part of the message to conform. That is not the case here....fantastic.

Amnesia620 03-04-2005 02:08 PM

Thank you, tecoyah. :) Some of my best work is on this thread now...I hope that it continues to get better.

Amnesia620 03-04-2005 05:40 PM

Baby Ashton
 
Kissing tiny fingers,
counting tiny toes,
this is the story,
this is how it goes.

New eyes see,
this new place,
peering upon,
a blurry face.

Time goes fast,
sure does fly,
See two there,
not sure why.

Give me love,
I need this,
Hold me close,
One more kiss.

One's my mom,
other lady - unsure,
lady has denied,
anyone but her.

I'm so little,
few months old,
mommy is warm,
lady is cold.

Oh mom why,
what'd I do,
lady is mean,
I want you.

Now I'm sad,
sob, cry, fuss,
lady hits mom,
she hurts us.

Mom's so lost,
an empty shell,
lady spanks me,
we're in Hell.

Mom's not home,
life almost lost,
late one night,
at my cost.

Mom's worried so,
Doc's only say,
all these rules,
mom's to obey.

I see Mom,
lady is upset,
calm down Mom,
please don't fret.

Few days later,
Grandpa has me,
I'm happy here,
he likes me.

Mom and lady,
discuss the drive,
I'm with Grandpa,
later I'll arrive.

Uh oh Mom,
lady just glared,
did Grandpa see,
Mom is scared.

Oh Grandpa insists,
let me stay,
lady says no,
it's all okay.

Evil lady's anger,
once it's begun,
damage so bad,
can't be undone.

Where am I,
there Mom stands,
she touches me,
I feel her hands.

The future's lost,
a struggle ahead,
where Mom goes,
I'm happily led.

This medical center,
helped me heal,
Mom is numb,
unable to feel.

People are here,
what Mommy why,
a new home
said as a sigh.

I saw Mom,
but not enough,
Mom missed me,
away was rough.

Grandpa and Mom,
love them so,
mine isn't home,
off I go.

Then one day,
Grandpa is here,
I'm looking around,
Mom's absence unclear.

They're both gone,
don't know why,
why'd they leave,
with no goodbye?

Amnesia620 03-05-2005 01:17 PM

Please read my Journal. My post was about the 5 ferrets that my best-friend, Sean, and I have raised - as well as the ferret I got for my ex-roommate, Jennifer. If you are interested in reading about something I hold very near and dear to my heart, please feel free to view my Journal. Otherwise, I hope you continue to read my poetry, other threads of mine, my posts, etc. with enjoyment. :)

Amnesia620 03-10-2005 07:53 PM

Pieces & Parts
 
This is the work I did for Writing Challenge #7:

*inspired* by the very respectable poem "Oh, Captain! My Captain!"
(I mean no disrespect)

Oh Feet! My feet! Our tiresome trip was fun;
the shoes have weathered every rock, the journey we sought is done;
The seat is near, the dogs I hear, the people all exhausted,
While hollow thighs the steady heel, the laces slim and tearing:
But O hurt! hurt! hurt!
O the bleeding dye of red,
Where on the step my Foot lies,
Fallen cold and dead.
________________________________________________

My two bright, precious eyes,
their ability is one I hold dear,
the best two little simple spies,
every truth I see remains clear.

My sight stays sharp and stern,
both continuously work long hours,
visual lessons are theirs to learn,
all richness shown never sours.

Two portals to another time,
glossy until my one last breath,
forever regarded as sublime,
just moments before my death.

Amnesia620 03-10-2005 07:56 PM

My work I did for Writing Challenge #8:

- The picture is black/white photo of an elderly couple, sittin' on the front porch. -


"What's that Ma? Hmm?
Huh? Who? What d'ja say?"
An old couple many years young,
and this funny game they play.

"Howdy there, friendly stranger,
kindly visiting to hear stories of old,
on this porch where our time's spent,"
the place these tales were first told.

"In my day, when I was youngin',"
the man said, forgetting the rest,
beware of lifetime's true tempo,
as it often erases memory's best.

Always walkin' uphill barefoot,
to a schoolhouse in the snow,
later generations roll their eyes,
to the fantastic stories of long ago.

"Now we ain't as young,
as we once use'ta be,"
the old man's hearing's gone,
his aging wife can barely see.

"Now, Jonathan, hush up,
'cause yer mumblin' again,
as my Pa woulda once said,
a quiet man is worth ten."

"Eh, Sarah? What's that now?"
Sarah looks over his way,
his deafness gets annoying,
her expression seemed to say.

"Sometimes, one of our sons,
visits with family in tow,
but youngin's and their energy,
for them, we move too slow."

"Both of our boys' are businessmen,
and they buy lots of nice things,
givin' us new watches or socks,
soft fingers display shiny gold rings."

"Our girls' all have forgotten,
the hardships endured of yore,
avoidin' us 'cause we embarrass,
makin' the truth easier to ignore."

A great time was had that day,
many stories they eagerly shared,
two elderly people were befriended,
by one kind stranger who cared.

In the moment the snapshot was taken,
during that unique and special day,
possessing a story all it's own,
precious words forever frozen this way.

Today, the stranger heard Sarah's news,
the picture the stranger endearly kept,
Johnathan's funeral was held last year,
last night Sarah died while she slept.

The stranger had become a loyal friend,
a vision that life's tempo is unable to erase,
strength empowered by the purity of love,
reflectively held in a kind strangers face.

And as we age and grey with time,
once a kind stranger, now I'm a friend,
friendship helps our old hearts to thrive,
so that their lessons live on without end.

Amnesia620 03-11-2005 04:05 AM

And now back to our regularly scheduled programing...

Amnesia620 03-18-2005 03:56 AM

Eternal Yearning
 
It was the final day and final visit
we knew
playing the role of mother and son
me and you
on this day I saw all of myself
my son
in another person whose life
just begun
I couldn't tell the future on that day
truly unjust
for my only child or even myself
lost trust
to know the first true love of my life
my boy
the single shining star in my dark sky
of joy
would stay safe and be truly loved
without me.

I didn't know myself before this moment
could be
a woman standing with her strengths displayed
showing pride
living with the most painful choice left in life
to decide
good or bad or yes or no or right or wrong
too many
decisions of how and where to go from here
if any
roses were ever to bloom in the middle of winter
they were
meant to represent my new hopes and dreams
that reassure
a heart uncertain and doubt intruding upon me
a pattern
interrupting a life in which I'd grown accustomed to
never return.

On this day the words I never thought of saying
good-bye
are the only words at all that I can think of to say
but why
I'm forced saying them to the one person in my life
I'm told
to wait out each day to see how the unseen future
will unfold.

Amnesia620 03-18-2005 05:24 AM

If I knew then what I know now,
I should've said,
what's in my head,
all that our time would allow.

A branch in wind must bend,
if not it'll break
for it's own sake,
certain damage unable to mend.

It's better to give than to receive,
gave my heart,
you tore it apart,
when you suddenly decided to leave.

If you had given me one little clue,
to what you meant,
in our time spent,
I'd still be the one without you.

tecoyah 03-18-2005 03:34 PM

Damn....that hurt even to read....One can only hope it comes from a wonderful imagination, rather than a life lesson.

Extremely well metered and clear in message...well done.

Amnesia620 03-19-2005 04:50 AM

Nice to hear a word of encouragement, Tecoyah. Thank you. Can't help but post what's on my mind at 5 or 6 am, after I wake up from a bad dream...somehow, though, none of my poems lately seem to be as good as they could be...

tecoyah 03-19-2005 06:10 AM

No poem ever written is as good as it could be.
That IMO is what makes art what it is.....imperfection creates something Unique.

We fight within
For perfect Muse
We never win
Instead confuse
The line I thought
But never Use
Is soon Forgot
And wasted.....My muse Abused

Amnesia620 03-24-2005 05:47 PM

From writing challenge #10

Rest your eyes upon my fragile, delicate frame,
I'm alone in the land that I've seen since I was born,
men with guns for my mothers death they blame,
they as in those that fly,
the birds that watched the moments of her death,
those that witnessed her final breath,
they saw her die...

How hard is a life that doesn't know how hard a hard life is?
What was that?
Dangers lurk just beyond the stream, behind a tree,
had I sensed this, I would've been quick to flee,
What was that?
Again!
I freeze, so still,
my hearing, so shrill...
BOOM!!
I hear the sound, I do not wait,
I do not think to hesitate,
my fate,
sealed not this time,
so sublime,
so far, so fast, through the forest I run,
a predator, my killer, just one,
for now, this battle I've won.

I have heard from those with wings,
they that skate the sky,
tales of the world beyond the trees only they can spy,
from their point of view so far, so high
explaining the desire to kill a doe, to redeem what I'm worth,
in danger of all predators since my birth,
to be wary of all until I return to the earth,
below me,
will show me,
no pain, no hurt,
once I'm a part of the dirt,
after these times I must be alert,
to stay alive,
I continue to strive,
peace will be known instead,
once my body is a shell, the earth accepts it's friend,
a deer,
wolf,
even a bird,
any life force, once begun now recycled, comes to live again.

Amnesia620 03-24-2005 06:24 PM

Time
as my watch ticks
my mind's tricks are played
tossed like a spade,
in a game
a game like "Go Fish"
the main course in last night's dinner
fish, ugh, what a winner
in the great race
this marathon we all call existance
we are all a part of a single consciousness
a land where we speak our mind, where we speak so freely
talking like we can do this or that
while on our asses we've only sat
all you're doing is talking the talk
too lazy to walk the walk
around the corner
we're not motivated to go
to the store
we trample across the floor
after the cashier's mopping job just done
we tread with little care
with muddy shoes the proof stays within
the work that the cashier has put into
all that he has done and will strive for
he will continue to strive
because he knows he's alive
are we?
will we ever be?
who are you and who am I?
Is there a reason to live or to die?
You see who I am
how I'm dressed
you make a face in your corduroy vest
the best
money can buy?
Why?

Fuck you
fuck you for making me think about you
your snotty look upon your ugly face
erase
make it disappear before it's my turn
then you'll learn
that a sneer like that is shit
you should've quit
while you were ahead
I don't remember
never to care about what I had to say
no way
were you ever there
so how is it fair?
That you are able
to never lay your cards upon the table
and still succeed
where I have failed in my years
my tears
the tears that ran down my cheeks for weeks
speaks
words you can never say
fuck you
for making me explain it this way.

Amnesia620 03-24-2005 06:45 PM

Upon my lips you lay your kiss,
but a kiss such as this,
is not upon the lips above,
but upon the lips below,
you know,
what kind of kiss,
is this,
such bliss,
I feel,
as I squeal,
with you laying between my knees,
as two young lovers,
explore a piece of humanity,
what makes us free,
is our want and our need,
our internal greed,
that which heals us also makes us bleed...

I giggle and wiggle,
as your tongue moves about,
no doubt,
our desire is strong,
in our song,
they way our bodies move,
as your hardness finds my groove,
parting ways,
my body obeys,
then it tightly clenches,
wrenches,
in waves I cannot say were less than ecstacy,
I expect to be,
you and me this way,
to stay,
ok, well rather, maybe I pray...

I've given you something now exchanging turns,
my hearts afire as it passionately burns,
out of me you slip, spent,
juices lent,
with dread my stomach churns.

But with sudden surprise,
you take me as your prize, your gift,
this, my spirits, does lift,
no drift, not miffed,
I connect with you like none,
a beautiful story has begun...

Amnesia620 03-24-2005 07:55 PM

You see that girl over there
she thinks she's nothing, no one
all her life she's stupid, retarded or dumb
she doesn't care any longer
shes stronger
than she knows
and so it goes
so the story goes...

All the questions in her mind
no answer could she find
time must rewind
make them see
the beauty within me
please stop being so blind.

But yet they chose to persist,
finding faults on their list
enforced with fists,
upon her face,
the bruises trace,
where she tried to resist.

An unaware eye at first glance,
where they choose to dance,
taking their chance
where she lost
at what cost
her pride's confident stance.

Amnesia620 03-25-2005 09:03 AM

So, you want to pretend...
 
*This one's title is actually displayed - chosen inexplicably*

You want to act like you know something?
silence gives others reason to think you're wise,
by opening up your mouth you remove all doubt,
words worth nothing but shit
come out, they just fall out
what do you want now?
I couldn't give less of shit about your sex life,
with details about you "getting some",
please, stop your humming,
and your fingers from drumming,
on my desk and it's table top,
please stop, just stop...

Cause the subject to drop,
make your voice stop,
rattling off in my ear,
is all that you've allowed me to hear,
the outside world noise would surround,
if you weren't around,
around me,
so please let it die,
don't even wonder and ask why,
this subject should die,
you see, that is for me to know,
not for me to spell-out,
scream, shout,
though I've begun to doubt,
my chances to win this debate,
am I too late?
Fate...
Wait...what now?
oh, that's...just great,
can't you hush?
Quiet! Shut Up! Shush!

Hey now, look, I'm sorry,
don't turn away,
don't be so upset,
don't fret,
I've hurt your feelings I bet,
the way I've handled this matter, these things,
I really didn't mean everything I said,
I lost my head,
and in the end,
I know I will regret what I'm now saying,
once again I'll be praying,
oh, how I should've listened to my gut,
and let you go away while...
I kept my mouth shut.

J.R.V.A. 03-25-2005 09:12 AM

Nice work... I like to read your stuff

Amnesia620 03-25-2005 09:59 PM

Thank you, JRVA, I'm glad to hear that. :) Feel free to enjoy it as much and as often as you like. :D

Amnesia620 03-26-2005 09:45 PM

tecoyah - thank you. Thank you for all of your kind words, your support, your friendship, thank you for being you. You've made me realize how much I should appreciate my friends...even more, the ones I have a unique, direct, uninterrupted connection with. You're a great person, friend, and moderator. I'm not the only one that appreciates you, however, I am unique in what I appreciate you for. You've made me smile with your poetry and your honesty about my work...you've answered questions that I had no answers for, you've helped me to think about things I hadn't yet.
Thank you. You've helped me to grow. You will always, regardless of the past, present or future, be considered an ally and friend. And in that, you are great.

tecoyah 03-27-2005 05:29 AM

Bide the Wiccan Law ye must,
In Perfect Love, in Perfect Trust
Eight Words the Wiccan Rede Fulfill:
And Ye Harm None, Do As Ye Will
And Ever Mind the Rule of Three
What Ye Send Out , Comes Back to Thee
Follow This with Mind an Heart
And Merry Ye Meet, And Merry Ye Part

Amnesia620 03-27-2005 10:13 PM

Thank you for displaying that, Tecoyah. That works perfectly here. I wish everyone would live by this. Maybe someday the world will be naturally utopian...it's a hope, I suppose...

tecoyah 03-30-2005 07:19 PM

And a hope worth having.....if ever there was one

Amnesia620 03-31-2005 02:37 PM

To push the thought out
or let the thought die
she's never the one willing
to let sleeping dogs lie.

To not think of tecoyah
she doesn't dare have the nerve
to push these thoughts away
causing them to lose their verve.

To encourage them and to be
to welcome them all into her mind
ensures a good thought to stay there
and a short break from the mental grind

When drinking in vision
of one close to home
accepting of mission
no longer alone
No tears in the offing
or fear in this heart
for though it is daunting
we cant be apart

A connection of importance
friendship made from chance
from this, anyone will ever get
the most memories ever set
in time's hands now they are
only the wind knows how far
as far as the wind ever blows
secrets of one the other knows

And so in this cradle
of safety and care
no reason to worry
no danger is there
I offer no labels
or reasons to cry
I tell you no fables
is pointless to try
If only in wording
A feeling I send
of someone who knows you
a mind loving friend

Any harm to a friend is harm I bind
reflecting smiles so brightly shined
blessed with two minds lovely views
a win win world where no one can lose.

Thank you, Tecoyah. This poem would have been nothing without you.

Amnesia620 04-04-2005 09:01 AM

Fighting with my heart
suffering in my mind
the world around me
everyone is so blind

I'm the one with sight
only I can see
all the things around
all thats before me

tecoyah 04-04-2005 03:37 PM

Tortured.....yet strong....well done Amnesia

Amnesia620 04-07-2005 09:42 AM

Thank you, tec...once again, thank you. :)

Amnesia620 04-07-2005 10:45 AM

I've been awake all night, again,
the darkness has slipped away,
enchanted by the light of my computer,
now dimmed by the light of a new day...

The knowledge within my machine,
held within pages of the internet,
has me compelled to learn more,
it has become a life-long asset...

Each day off and also after work,
this habit of mine has remained so,
I spend hours of time just absorbing,
forever curious is my need to know...

First I search for an explanation,
the reason to it remains undefined,
the purpose to which it exists,
becomes a challenge to find...

Then I suddenly give up on it,
and I decide to take a break,
in just reading my cousin's page,
increases my concern for her sake...

For anyone who cares to hear,
this news now turns my gut,
to know that my cousin's arms,
are what she's chosen to cut...

Then Andy comes home early,
with gossip of someone's life,
our friend's secret is discovered,
an intimate act not with his wife...

One second of time and I deny,
speaking all the reasons for doubt,
giving all the reasons of rationale,
trying to understand and figure it out...

His wife is about to have a baby,
she is equally my dear friend also,
the rumor is bound to be revealed,
this secret is one I'm ashamed to know...

Amnesia620 04-07-2005 11:11 AM

Fade To Black
 
No no let me explain...
wait, now, that's not rain,
each drop is a moment of pain,
it's beginning to flood,
though I am thankful it's not blood,
my conciousness would fade,
before I laid,
in the bed I just made,
my life was once celebrated,
and my face was elated,
now I am no more,
the one thing I abhorr,
right to my own core,
I look upon my empty face,
a placeless person with a place,
now a part of a new space.


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