thespian86

I have a series of [sort of] narrative poetry called 'Paper and Vinyl'. It's my version of a mix-tape. They are all some sort of love poem. I'll just use this as a thread and post the pieces separately. I'd really like to know what you think, so please let me know. Thanks.

The first piece is titled 'Blackbird/Yesterday'


Blackbird/Yesterday *


I found myself wishing recently,
Reconstructing really,
I’d walk through a door to have you leap on me unexpectedly,
You did it once when we were just kids,
I felt powerful then,
Like a single man conquering a quarrelsome peoples,
An instantly unsatisfied population of creatures,
Fuel to my core I’ll say,
But I wasn’t much of a charmer or person.
And to have you throw your hungry arms around me so dramatically,
To feel your need as you pulled me tight.
So overjoyed I had to support your tiny frame.
And you whispered something so image worthy,
And to me of all things,
So slowly it worked its way through me as you spoke,
Like the Holy Spirit empathetically possessing a broken man.

The words are something I lost along the way back to you,
But Then?
Then, I felt grace.
Yes, I felt powerful Then
Though, I feel I’d appreciate it more now.

Jesus.
It seems like,
All I do is appreciate you lately.



* Title taken from George Martin's mash up of The Beatles' 'Blackbird' and 'Yesterday' from the album LOVE.

---------- Post added at 01:44 AM ---------- Previous post was at 01:41 AM ----------

The Only Living Boy In New York. *

I spend so much.
You have no idea.
I spend so much of my life fucking petrified,
And I’m not sleeping 20 hours a day.
So I shake a lot.

Today I heard more than a couple comments in passing,
People discussing the longer days,
And all I could feel was –
Thank god.
The nighttime is really hard.
There was a mild winter morning a few months ago,
Two hours departed from where I could stand how lonesome I was,
I just rode a streetcar west,
In hopes of finding a little cheap salvation in virgin soil,
To discover pieces of America in Queen West pawn shop fronts,
I almost wanted to white wash the city,
I wanted to set myself of sentimentality,
Like I’d white wash myself,
I swear,
I will.

Sometimes I get so caught up,
I end up spending too much.
Like a communist I spend.
And I spent those hours aching,
Sprawled uncomfortably across the back row,
Displacing the Tuesday barfly who sat three rows up instead,
And when we got to the other end I just sat with my head in my hands,
Praying to you I guess,
‘Please just go away.’
I just felt ill.
I just felt ill with you,
Where before I was drunk,
Now it was pure decline.
And I told myself:
‘this is going to happen forever’

I fashionably chose further deprivation.
Three blocks west of here.
Leaving a coffee shop the next afternoon,
A bitter cold Tuesday,
I bumped into a woman with a dog
A childhood dog that I miss in an unusual way,
But instead I undressed her with my eyes,
And felt soulless.
And I can’t remember where I was walking,
But I know it felt shameful,
I felt so unlike myself when I got on the next streetcar,
Like the negotiation that got me out of house earlier that morning,
I said: “Maybe if I work at it, it’ll change”
Which is all I ever let myself attempt,
Yeah, I longed to feel something wild,
I guess it was meant to remind me of why I love this.
When really,
It really just felt like a poorly timed sexual conquest.

And though I’m not obsessed,
I still think you’re perfection.

* Simon and Garfunkle song from their album 'Bridge Over Troubled Water'.

__________________
EX: Whats new?
ME: I officially love coffee more then you now.
EX: uh...
ME: So, not much.