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07-24-2006, 08:17 PM
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#1 (permalink) |
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Insane
Location: in a golden garden of grey
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A journey into me.
Rainbow
Today, I saw a rainbow. It was unlike any rainbow I'll ever see. It raced across the sky and blinded into me. stunned from the impact, I stepped back into time, and was left at the threshold of my mercy. Gripping sodomy, I leapt into its clutch. There, I touched the rainbow, and its hues of many colors. Lightly, the pastels danced together, like children at play Boldly, the brighter ones watched with such enthusiasm Proudly, dark images surrounded the entire place. Outlines of black cleansed each and every one. The rainbow had no light. It had trapped all the colors in its infinate abyss. The dancing became morbid, the struggling of monstrosities The watching became sadistic, foreplay of its madness The closeness became the suffocation of where light dominates. Black clouds had shrouded the beauty of light and love Its existance had simply ceased to come forth. Lifted up by currents of color, with essence, sweet as life. Blues, yellows, reds, and greens entwine pleasuring me with exctasy, carried by darkness I am delivered back to my own time with that rainbow in my pocket. _________________________________________________________________ Crazy again... Is it something in the air? Or is it just this life? Am I ever going to feel again? Lifted up by praise and a need>? Or am I just crazy? I feel so depraved of arms tightly clenching. I can hear your breathe upon my neck, but you are not here. I can taste your flesh upon my tongue, but I have never had you. I can see your staring eyes looking up at me, but it is only in my dreams. I can smell your sweet aroma linger near, but it is something I must forget. Or am I just crazy? Forlorn tears bleed their silent pain. Hidden words wail their lonesome song. A sensation of touch dwindles into a memory. Forbidden desire tears at my sanity. An empty heart shatters... Or am I just crazy? A year has passed and everything is still the same. I packed my bags long ago. Still, though, they sit, dusted over, from my want. Another life may be the right time, but can I wait that long? Longing for the moment when all of it seems worthwhile. Eternity has taken on a new form, waiting. I watch myself from a distance. Painful and mute, mourning a loss that never was. Stained and broken, sweeping up the remains. Scared and lonely, confidence is non existant. Suddenly I cant see. I am dying. I must be. Impatient for my fate coming to pass, I whisper goodbye. Then I realize its only a moment of weakness, liquified, pouring from the windows of my soul. Entwined in fantasy, reality can almost be tolerable. Crazy again... _________________________________________________________________ Forsaken. Compelled to see through this haze of grace. Staring at the solid object of imagination. Freaking the correctness of its failure. I fall to my knees, afraid to go on. Nestled in the absence of something, burning sensations of fire flow through me. I cant have the pleasure of it and turn away, pushing back the guilt of only true purity. Its a shame that everything isnt real. Its only an opinionated veiw of faith. Does this mean I cant be among the living? Or does it mean Im already dead? Feeling all, and emptiness, dancing with its embrace, I take back a look at the beauty that I have created. A touch of wonder revives my will but is smashed upon the past. Forsaken lies, soothing to the soul, are reminiscence of greatness. I swallow the seeds of immortal flowers, that bloom, always gorgeous, but the stalks of those dead remain just that, something to throw away. _________________________________________________________________ Reflections. Like broken glass, scattered on the floor, I am in peices. Shattered into millions. Descending into blackness. Coldness envelopes me. Hate rushes up, to replace emotion. I am looking up through every sharpened shard. _________________________________________________________________ Fornaciate Recessd imitations come into veiw, Silentily floating into the thoughts of my head. Recognizing a confusing world filled with lack of care. Riled and ready to destroy all that is dear. Swaying with the rhythm of decision. Rising higher above to veiw ones self. Criminating with hardened eyes, Judging without depth, A toll to pay for all of time. Agreeing without consent, ignorant to the harshness of others. A dead stare fills your eyes with tears. Such a cold embrace to feel after shock. Impressions leaving similar scars. Intelligence seizing to exist. Leaving will helpless to the cruel justice of what is called Life. _________________________________________________________________ Hello. Trust, it bent me over. Love, there is no such thing. Goodbyes is all there is left. The glitter lining around the cloud is suffocating me. Its allright. Its ok. Things are better today. A face still haunts my dreams. I get carried away again, only to awaken with nothing. You were sweet. Sweetness that rotted away my prettiest smile. I died through that, all is left is this body. Yesterday is just a memory, but Ill tell you what I remember... Patience... I waited for nothing. Honesty... I should have lied Love... there is no such thing. Goodbyes is all there is left. I suffocated. _________________________________________________________________ Anticipation. Examining the alternate routes down my path, caution trickles down my spine. Step into the future in an instance. Molding clay becomes the life given. Silohettes of beauty and peace shadow my way. I reach for them in vain. Then my vain becomes my pain. A warmth of kindness tilts my face towards the sun and kisses it with love. Desperation unfolds before me and I shy away, hiding in the darkness. Creeping from the light, I explore the darkened path unaware of the pinpoints of life swirling beyond. Eyes evolve into this world. I see nothing else. Brightness comes through stained glass. Then the pain I got in vain rots away to nothing but a stain. The pollution in my mind reacts as waves of chills wash over my skin. Feeling a touch upon this skin, the horribleness of it turns pleasant. The sun is shining down upon me again. Hardened eyes soften into the illumination. Cold swirls away into chambers unknown. I refrain the pain of vain that was a stain, now washed away by certain rain, cleansed, has become my gain. Suddenly, its not so insane, I wait for the fruit to ripen. _________________________________________________________________ A Shaken Day. take it slow take it fast take it however it helps to get past... all the pain all the joy all the fuzzy times in your life. time is wasting time is wounded it is now your enemy slashing threads tied to your past take it slow take it fast take it however it help to get past, your past never once did i change my mind slavefully devoted never once did i turn back and now, ive been demoted lay back and watch it all drain talk back and it turns to pain stand tall and live in -sane how could it be true? i should have heard from you now its all a memory of distant things turned blue a shaken day
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...absent of everything. Last edited by absence_of_color; 07-24-2006 at 08:50 PM.. Reason: Automerged Doublepost |
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