Eowyn_Vala

...to write a few poems for the first time in a long time. There are two, and they are about different people, both of which I'm having a few issues with in my life.

Sweet Dreams Little Liar!

I'm haunted by the memory of you.
Why can't you leave?
I don't want you around.
I hate you!
I hate what you've done.
As long as you aren't here, I'm happy.
But you always come back.
You never stay away.
One of these days, I'll smack that little smile off your face.
What will you say then, what will you do?
I know I'd win, hate gives you strength.
I've never hated anyone before.


Forgive? You? Never!
Once I would have, if you'd asked.
If you'd said you were sorry, then all would have been forgotten.
But you didn't, you just moved right along.
Then you expected me to do the same.
I couldn't, you'd hurt me!
You'd betrayed that friendship we'd had.
Trust takes a while to build again,
and it takes effort from both sides.
Pity you never gave that effort!


Pretty little liar! That's what you are.
Sluttly little bitch! That is also what you are!
You flaunt yourself and throw yourself at men.
When they lose interest before you, they are cruel.
If you lose interest first, it wasn't meant to be.
You think you're sexy?
No you aren't, at all.
It makes me physically ill to see the way you act around men!
I can't stand knowing that at one point I called you friend!


Hate doesn't let go, it grows inside of you.
I've tried to see past all this, to who I thought you were.
It never works.
I'll never forget!
I'll always hate you!
But I'll deal with it, and move on with my life.
I won't wonder when you'll pop back in,
or what you'll say and do.
I'll forget you exist as best I can.
There will be the occasional reminder that you do,
but I can ignore those too.

From this moment on you are dead to me.
Like the friendship we once had is dead.
And if you ever try to change things,
if you ever interfer in my life again,
well all I can say is don't.
Because I hate and hate is a very strong thing.
Sweet Dreams Little Liar!


I felt much better after writing this one. It was almost as if I really did just let it all go. I still have strong feelings towards this person but they aren't bottled up anymore. It feels really good.


Diabetic Death

You're killing yourself and you don't care!
Can't you see what you are doing?
Look at everything you have:
A beautiful 3 month old little boy who's the best baby in the world!
A great boyfriend who is willing to deal with all that extra baggage you've got...
Parent's who will and would do anything for you!
Haven't they already?
Friends who listen and care about you but want you to make your own decisions.

Standing by watching you make some of the decisions you do,
well it truely does test the limit of friendship.
What can I do?
I've thought and thought and thought.
I've done research trying to better understand the whys and hows!
I can't understand why you are doing this!
Do you not care?
Are you just not thinking?
START THINKING! Dammit!

I know as friends we had those rough spots.
And as for friendships, it's only been a little over 2 years.
Some might call this long, but it really isn't.
You have friends that have been around longer.
Maybe they say things to you, maybe they don't.
I feel so helpless everytime you mention things.
Oh how often your blood sugar is too high,
and you always have to stop and tell me.
What am I supposed to do?
Just tell me that!
Tell me how to help you so you don't die!

You don't see death around the corner.
You have all your limbs, your sight,
feeling in your hands and feet,
you even have all your organs!
But living the way you do,
it's only a matter of time.
If there is anything I've learned
in all the research I've done, it's that.
Tell me how to help you so you don't die!

Now this friend I've been worried about for a long time. Before she was pregnant, during, and now after. If anything she's at least being consistent at staying way over the blood sugar level she should. Until she over-compensates with the insulin and goes super low. I honestly can think of only a few times when we first met that she was close to normal levels. But I do feel better writing this out as well. I couldn't seem to organize my thoughts, it was just anger towards her and frustration on my part.

Thanks for reading. Please comment if you wish. I would love to hear anything back whether you liked it or not.

__________________
Cain: I know what you're doing. I've lead troops into battle before.
DG: And, how am I doing?
Cain: Well, there's less *hugging* when I do it