I have an appointment with a psychologist Monday afternoon.

I really should talk stuff over with Grace before obsessing about the details. The psychologist cannot prescribe medications herself, but that doesn't really matter. Most will be working with a consulting psychiatrist or neurologist and will write a referral if it's determined that anti-depressants are warranted, or if I like I can just take the referral to my primary care physician, in my case my gynecologist. I use my gyno as my primary care for simplicity's sake. Most of my health problems tend to be plumbing related, and I have to see her anyway, so why have the hassel of a second doctor for the other stuff?

I'm not ready for this, but I've thrown my hat over the fence, so there's no turning back.

Gilda

Yay for you, Gilda!!! :thumbsup:

Btw, if it makes you feel any better, I am seeing an individual therapist tomorrow for the first time in three years (as opposed to a group, which I had been doing for two years). It's a man, and even though he led my group for the last year and I trust him, I am a little nervous about the change in therapy styles. One-on-one is so intense, and yet I have to remember that this was my choice... and therefore I am determined to get as much out of it as I can. But just wanted to let you know that I am rather intimidated (scared!), too.

Hooray for you! Please let us know how it goes. I am so glad for you. :)

I really think that goals and the journey to reaching your goals are what brings happiness. As I stated in my wacky post above.

Perhaps I am too simple-minded for you guys, you guys seem to be having trouble with happiness on a deeper scale.

My therapist for the last several years was a man, and I always felt very comfortable with him. This will be my first time with a woman.

I tried group counseling twice, but hated it. It's so much harder to open up in a group, so much easier to just sit and listen that it wasn't doing me any good. I was afraid to talk about myself because . . . well, for the usual reasons, because I was embarassed by my past, and because I'm a living cliche. It was easier with just the one person.

Good luck with yours, also. It's a crime for hot babes like us to be sad :).

Gilda

For some people, sure. As I said in my first response to this, I have goals--don't screw up my job, maintain a pleasant and orderly household for my family, make Grace happy, get my arm healed, and working towards those isn't making me happy. I might add trying to be more assertive and social, but both of those have been pretty unpleasant so far.

Today has been a good day. We're all moved in to the new house, and it's prewired for wireless networking everywhere, so I can take my laptop anywhere and still be connected. It's awesome. The novelty will probably wear off soon, and I'll just get used to it, like I have with my car.

My permanent cast comes off next week, and I get to begin physical therapy. Oh joy.

Gilda

Happiness is not a constant state of mind or emotion. I’m happy when I’m happy and sad when I’m sad, and so on. I let myself feel without allowing it to steal my joy, at least, this is what I strive towards. However, I am content and fulfilled.

I consider my life fruitful. I don’t look at life and say, “I have all these things but I wish I had this now and I can’t have it.” I don’t compare one person’s happiness to my own. I don’t have expectations of what happy is “supposed” to look like necessarily for me.

I do know what happiness does not feel like and does not look like. I know life will change, and I am willing to be flexible with those changes, even if sometimes it’s hard, that doesn’t mean that the outcome won’t be an achievement.

Relationships are hard work and people transition and experience seasons in their own personal lives and selves. I knew when I got married that we would both change and grow with each other. I’ve been through a lot so I am at a place in my life where I feel at peace, finally.

I adore my husband and appreciate so deeply his love for me, and his understanding of me. I am close with my daughter, and she knows I love her. I am active in my church and advocacy work, artistic endeavors, singing in a gospel group and being involved in ministry work. All of these things bring me much fulfillment.

I think the key is doing everything I am called to do through the divine relationship I have with my Lord. Everything else is blessings, answered prayers and protection.

random question (not stealing th thread) - anyone find happiness in strange things?

Killing houseflies with a fly swatter, something that makes me happy right there. I can't stand the little buggars...

95% of happiness is the decision to act contented.

IMO--you don't have to be psychotically giddy to be happy--you just deal as things come along. "Just dealing" builds self-confidence and you can trust your own ability to handle situations. Trying to "make" or "keep" someone else happy is FUTILE...You only have control of yourself...choose to be the master of your own perceptions and LET GO of everyone else's shit--you do yourself and them a favor.

Some days I'm great. Some days I'm looking for a postman's uniform and an Uzi. Sometimes I see tomorrow as a new day with new opportunities; sometimes I see tomorrow as lying in ambush.

And on the bad days, I just remember to breathe and that everything, good and bad, is subject to change without notice.

(For the metaphorically challenged, that Uzi reference is a figure of speech. God bless the NSA.)

I'm almost always happy, but I worked for it.

I consider myself to be healthy, I enjoy my job, and I work at managing my money well and not overspending. I don't drink, smoke, or use other drugs because I don't feel the need to "escape reality." My family is awesome and as a result, make enjoying life very easy for me.

My life is good, and if it isn't, I make changes as soon as possible so that it is. I tend to find positives if at all possible, and I love my sense of humor.

The key for me is always being positive. If a negative occurence arises - and they are bound to - I just look for some positives and expand them.

I have pets; I don't currently have a girlfriend. I'd rather be single and content than in a relationship just for the sake of being in a relationship. Until Miss Right comes along, I love being single because it allows me to be and do whatever I want.

Lastly, I rarely stress out. I used to be very stressed in high school and have since realized what a waste of time this state/mindset was. Over time, I have noticeably changed and become much more easy going, humorous, and laid back. Perhaps too laid back, but again, I'd rather enjoy life when at all possible, than stress over stupid shit.

I think it's easy to be depressed/sad in the modern world, and being consistently happy takes work. But the payoff is the best, because realistically, being happy is the foundation for enjoying life. And if you aren't enjoying life, then you aren't truly living IMO.

To me, being happy is more about a mindset, and the way one approaches life, than it is about material possessions or belongings.

For instance, I may love driving around in my Honda, but if I focus on the fact that I can't afford a Porshe instead of enjoying the experience, I won't be happy. I could buy a Porsche and be up to my eyeballs in debt, but that too would stray from happiness.

Another key to being happy is living within one's means, and accepting it. Desiring things that are out of reach will likely lead to depression, sadness, and obviously envy.

Happiness to me is living in the now, and enjoying it completely. And I am.

I've been thinking about happiness lately as well. I will try and pick up a copy of that book!


I think my bout of philosophical thinking was spurred by me being in a transition stage in life. I am moving from a schoolkid (16 years of school kinda puts you in a certain track) to a college graduate and full blown adult with bills and a job and and and....ya...lots of crap.

I find myself questioning a lot of things...things that I thought life was a bout, or at least made me happy....seem to not matter too much anymore. Now that i dont have the distraction of school, I see a little more clearly.

I think you need to do some serious soul searching. I think the reason for your non-contentness is very deep and that ultimately you are going to need to discover it yourself.

Just remember, there are other people in your canoe, you are not traveling alone.

Take Care