Why am I only finding girls either already married or already in another relationship
 

Hi all
I am living in Orlando doing the Disney College Program thing. I am meeting a TON of new people. I've been here a little over a month and I can't seem to find a freaking girl who I'm interested in who is either not married or not already in another relationship (either back at home or here). :hmm:

Is this just bad luck or am I just doing something wrong? I see a lot of these girls all the time and the feelings I have for these girls are starting to kill me. I meet a girl and get to know her and become friends with her and then BAM, she's either married or has another boyfriend. I feel that if I finally find someone who isn't in another relationship that these other strong feelings for these other girls I know will die down a bit to more of a friendship level. Or something like that. :|

I am not sure, but would it not be wise to state my feeling to a girl who already is in another relationship with someone else? There is this one girl who I have more feelings for, but, like I've been saying, she's in another relationship (back at home). We all go back home at the end of the year to our old lives. I work with her at the same resort and see her everyday.

Any advice would be appreciated. :)

- Undercover_Man

I have the exact same problem. It's not that I only know females who have S/Os or spouses, it's just that i'm only interested in the ones that do. My friend claims that it's just because "I want what I can't have," but I think it's more than that. Every one of these girls has similar qualities that I find very attractive.

I would suggest NOT telling these girls how you feel. I mean, put yourself in the other person's shoes. If some guy told your girlfriend that he liked her, how would you feel? This has already happened to me, by some guy that was supposed to be my friend. And I can tell you, that it feels absolutely awful. Not just that, but you mentioned that you're friends with these girls. Once you tell them how you really feel, you are potentially burning a bridge. A lot of the time, you will no longer be as close as you were before.

Give it some time, I had a crush on a girl for over 4 years. I could've swore that I was in love. Took me those 4 years to realize that I DID love her as I would my sister, but not as a lover.

you guys need to listen to Love Line. Obviously you're only attracted to these girls because they're in relationships. Maybe you had a chaotic family life, or you were molested as a child or something... :p (that was a Love Line joke, for those that don't listen...)

Anyway, yeah, don't tell her. That would be stupid. She's not going to break up with that guy to be with you. It'll only fuck up the relationship you guys have.

You know, they don't always have boyfriends when they say they have boyfriends. Or even husbands. Sometimes a woman feels it's prudent to officially take herself out of the game for a while, especially when she's on her own far from home.

Just keep being your charming self. Someone will come along. Maybe even someone whose "boyfriend" has magically vanished.

I'm glad there is another fan. I have a hard time reading the Sexuality forum after so many years of Loveline. Alarm bells go off whenever I read something like "I'm a very sexual person" or other such euphemisms.

But anyway, it isn't healthy to be attracted solely to unavailable people. You might want to try giving those seemingly boring, single women a chance in spite of your instinct not to.

What is this 'Loveline' and how can I get an earful of it?

Nah, it's simpler than that. It's more of a numbers game, really. Just keep meet gals 'til you find one that's single.

To "screen out" the married women, check for a wedding ring. And if you are becoming good friends with these attached gals, see if they'll introduce you to someone.

And check out LoveLine, it's great.

Well, I hope that isn't my case. As I stated above, they all do have similar qualities that I find attractive.

I am attracted to some girls that aren't taken, but for the most part, they are taken.


This loveline dealy has me curious. Anyone have more info?

Man, I know how you feel. It seems like whenever I'm even remotely interested in a girl and become friends with her, I then find out she's in a relationship already. It kinda bums me out since I think I've finally connected with someone then to find out they're taken. I still remain friends with them, but it's also feels kinda wierd for awhile.

Thank god I'm still in college and can use tools like thefacebook.com to do some preliminary research before making a move. It's saved my ass from awkwardness before :thumbsup:

-Robert

i have a link to Loveline on my other comp. I'll go get it in a little bit and add an "edit" here. So check back in a little bit.
I just wanted to let you guys know it was coming. :p

Go here: http://1077theend.com/ and listen to the stream from 10pm PST to 12am PST and you shall catch Loveline.

Voila.

Just a note: you do have to register to access the streaming content, so be prepared :)

thanks for the link onesnowyowl.

I did some research, and you can get podcasts of loveline here. The 'official homepage' is here

well here's a direct link to the streaming : Loveline
so there, onesnowyowl. :p

Hopefully it works...that whole mms thing is a little wierd sometimes about linking.

all the good ones with the good qualities get gobbled up early.

Exactly. Because the gals you're interested in probably have the qualities that most men are interested in, those back home have already pursued them, or married them.

Here's what I learned after high school, and wish I'd known it then: I started dating those that were interested in me. Very few would have made the cover of VOGUE, but I wasn't a candidate for GQ, either. After dating about 3 dozen young ladies, I was quite comfortable in the dating game, and got where I could spot potential future dates in casual conversations. It led me to where I could ask out my now-wife (of 24 years) with ease.

Bottomline: You have narrowed your field to those that you are interested in; when you do that, you have thinned the herd to a point where you seem to be starving.

LOL I like how you meet them.. they are "single" and then suddenly they transform into "BAM!" gotta a boyfriend or husband.

It happens to be the point in time in your life more than likely...