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Old 06-13-2005, 10:12 PM   #1 (permalink)
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I feel like a goddamn kid.

I feel like a goddamn kid. I'm 18, turning 19 here soon in July, and I wish I was an adult. College still feels a little bit like highschool around here, and it seems like many of the students don't take their lives seriously -- which I find both irritating and disturbing. I figure if I was an adult, the people I'm around will have realized that there is more to life than partying and, perhaps, finally understand people like myself. I'll go out with friends and aquaintances, but sometimes I tell them that I have work to do, and that it's important to me. Whenever I do this they just look at me like I'm crazy and tell me to get a life, sometimes jokingly, sometimes not. When I'm at work I also sometimes wonder if people actually listen to what I say, because I feel like I get discredited and written off just because I'm young, regardless of what I have to say. So tell me, does it get better once you're out there and in the "real world"? I'm sure it's the same to some degree. Everyone likes to go out and party once and a while. There will always be office politics. But will anyone every say, "Now I know why that guy refused to party that one night." Or at work will someone ever say, "I like that idea because that guy knows what he is talking about." Will people get off my back for not jumping at every opportunity to get drunk that presents itself? Will the older people I'm around ever actually listen to what I have to say? Will I ever find some understanding and mutual respect? For those of you more experienced than myself, what can I expect?
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Old 06-13-2005, 11:12 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Dude you're still young. Enjoy it.
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Old 06-13-2005, 11:20 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Hey Jesus, I see what you mean, but there are times I don't want to be treated any differently than an adult, if you see where I'm coming from. I think if I act reasonably and responsibly, as I try to do, I should be treated based on those actions. Essentially, I feel that I work like an adult, but that I am still sometimes considered “sub-par” because of my age. Is that just something I should expect, or am I just being naive?
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Old 06-13-2005, 11:38 PM   #4 (permalink)
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I know how it is. I'm 26 and feel I don't get taken seriously by a lot adults because I look really young. All I can say is fuck them really. Most adults are boring anyway.
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Old 06-14-2005, 05:15 AM   #5 (permalink)
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I'm twenty, still getting the same old crap. I work at a job where I do not have to see people face to face, and luckily they think I am older than I actually am. Just enjoy yourself for now, and then later you'll enjoy being older and hassling the younger 'kids.'
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Old 06-14-2005, 05:28 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ryborg
I feel like a goddamn kid. I'm 18, turning 19 here soon in July, and I wish I was an adult.
I hate to sound like a grown-up, but I am -- the only thinKi can say here, is don't wish your life away... you get one shot to be this age... Enjoy it while you are in it, if you spend your time wishing you were older, you'll miss out on some stuff.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ryborg
College still feels a little bit like highschool around here, and it seems like many of the students don't take their lives seriously -- which I find both irritating and disturbing.
Once you hit the working world, you will find that some people still don't take their lives seriously, and still act like they are in high school, it's the person, not the environment. You can't change other people, you can just be true to yourself.

[QUOTE=ryborg]I figure if I was an adult, the people I'm around will have realized that there is more to life than partying and, perhaps, finally understand people like myself. I'll go out with friends and aquaintances, but sometimes I tell them that I have work to do, and that it's important to me. Whenever I do this they just look at me like I'm crazy and tell me to get a life, sometimes jokingly, sometimes not. [.quote]
There are some adults who still haven't figured this out yet. Give yourself a pat on the back for understanding responsibility.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ryborg
When I'm at work I also sometimes wonder if people actually listen to what I say, because I feel like I get discredited and written off just because I'm young, regardless of what I have to say.
Some people might write you off because of your age, it's their loss, they will eventually come around. Other people will write everyone else's opinion's off because those opinions aren't theirs, age is not even a factor, that need to always be right i s what drives that.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ryborg
So tell me, does it get better once you're out there and in the "real world"?
In the real world, you will find the slackers, and the professional partiers and the boys and girls who don't want to grow up, you being responsible will eventually pass them by and they won't matter so much. You will associate with people who are more like you, and those others will kind of dissappear from your view.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ryborg
Will people get off my back for not jumping at every opportunity to get drunk that presents itself?
Yes
Quote:
Originally Posted by ryborg
Will the older people I'm around ever actually listen to what I have to say?
Yes, keep doing what you are doing, and keep your cool when dealing with people and you will eventually be heard
Quote:
Originally Posted by ryborg
Will I ever find some understanding and mutual respect?
I'm more than twice your age and am still looking to find that -- Hopefully you will be more successful than me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ryborg
For those of you more experienced than myself, what can I expect?
You can expect to live your life for yourself, and do what makes you happy. It takes a strong person to not succumb to peer pressure no matter what the age is... It gets easier as you get older, but give yourself a lot of credit for finding your own way now and doing what you want to do.

It gets easier... Hang in there.
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Old 06-14-2005, 05:31 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ryborg
think if I act reasonably and responsibly, as I try to do, I should be treated based on those actions. Essentially, I feel that I work like an adult, but that I am still sometimes considered “sub-par” because of my age. Is that just something I should expect, or am I just being naive?
It's not naive, it's more a stereotype you are working against. Teenagers have a reputation, sometimes deserved, mostly undeserved for being less caring about the work. Or that they aren't working to support a family so the job means less to them. You just have to keep plugging away and keep doing what you are doing to prove them wrong. SOme will never get it, but others will come around.. Patience, grasshopper, patience..
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Old 06-14-2005, 05:56 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maleficent
It's not naive, it's more a stereotype you are working against.
I just want to add a little bit more along this point..

I think there is an expectation that teenagers are to be this whole party-animal, irresponsible, and without reason generalised bunch. There is so much marketing, advertising and media that portrays this type of persona for the teenage/early adult group. And some people never wake from this.

Often, people like yourself, can make those who would prefer to throw off responsibility and reason uncomfortable. Thus, the lack or intolerance to understanding your position and thoughts.

I agree with maleficient.. some will never "get it".. you may find a few, however, that will come around. Just think of it as a life lesson in learning tolerance.. mainly of those who don't seem to "get it"...
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Old 06-14-2005, 06:24 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Most college kids wake up at the end of junior year/start of senior year and know that 'the real world' awaits.

Also once you turn 21, half the fun of drinking is gone

I did more than my share of partying from 18-21 and I wish I would have had your attitude instead of the 'norm'. My grades would have been better, my life would have been easier, and I'd be about 2 years ahead of where I am right now.

In my experience, in the real world, those who can't give up the party aspect become the wage slaves, working jobs that they have to work, not want to work, and never really being happy. Some finally get a clue but it can take a very long time, others never do.

The nice thing is that in college it IS like highschool and you are lumped with people that you normally wouldn't choose to hang out with, after you leave school, people are a lot more spread out and you can do your own thing a lot easier.
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Old 06-14-2005, 06:54 AM   #10 (permalink)
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There's an interesting flipside to that coin. Also being 19, I know exactly what you mean about not being taken seriously and being stereotyped. However, I'm lucky enough to have attended a University where over 70% of the students are commuters, and often older. Additionally, I work at a job where I am valued for my ability with computers rather than my speed at feeding the hungry masses at the drivethru. When I worked fast food, or even as a cashier, I felt a great deal of disrespect for my age. However, working where I do now with salaried 35 year olds testing computer software, I'm suddenly "old." I am held accountable for my actions and respected for my work ethic. And I've got to tell you something.. its really not that great.

Freshman year of college, I was the epitomy of that stereotype: drinking Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and taking a break for Sunday to catch up on homework. I said some pretty asinine things and made an absolute fool out of myself. I enjoyed every minute of it, but I felt like I was destroying my life by being irresponsible.

Sophmore year, I toned back my drinking, got the job I have now AND got a great girlfriend. All of a sudden, I felt responsible. Wait a second, wasn't this what I was waiting for? Its a lot less satisfying then you'd think, often merely because of our age. I almost resent the fact that I can't be spontaneous and do the crazy things teenagers do -- like go shopping at Safeway at 2 am because you're bored. I HAD to work every day and go to school every day. Its nice, but at the same time I miss the "freewheeling spirit." So, in a long story short.. live it while you've got it -- and don't let the idiotic fools above and below you tell you who you are or how you should live.
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Last edited by Jinn; 06-14-2005 at 06:55 AM.. Reason: softmore? bahaha nice typo ;)
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Old 06-14-2005, 07:06 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Respect is something that is earned, not given because of age. Middle age isn't all that wonderful, either, enjoy your youth while you can. The period of time between when you feel a bit young and you feel a bit old, isn't that large.

Live your own life, take time to have some fun, and do the best you can at everything you do. Things will work out.
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Old 06-14-2005, 07:44 AM   #12 (permalink)
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I get the same, I turned 18 a few months ago and am still in High School...sorta.
I was in a job where I was payed less then a woman who was older then me, which was frusterating, but then I realised how ignorant my employer was, so I quit once I got a higher paying job. At school it seems like a lot of people assume they can walk all over your opinions and thoughts because "you don't know any better yet" which kinda shows how they don't know any better.

Just because you're 18 doesn't mean you have to party. I did all of that when I was 15/16 and got bored of it reaaallly fast. If someone gives you a hard time for not going out and partying brush them off. Maybe you want to look at making some new friends, who are a little bit older perhaps? Sometimes even 2 or 3 years is enough for the whole "LYK OMG EYE LIV AWAY FRUM MAH PAR-RENTALS LEZ GET CRUNK!!!1!1!111" attitude.

There's always going to be people who wanna party and people who discredit you in the "real world". The way to solve it? Find the people who don't and make them your friends.
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Old 06-14-2005, 08:24 AM   #13 (permalink)
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I think I know what you mean, but based on what you're saying, it seems like you're a lot more mature than your peers. Look, you don't have to do the whole partying thing if it's not true to yourself. I did a little of that just to fit in but found out it really wasn't for me. If people can't handle that you don't like to party, that's their problem. It can be tough since a lot of social situations revolve around this and you feel like you're being excluded for not wanting to drink but that's life I guess. It's not always easy.

True, there are a lot of careers/jobs that tend to revolve around drinking as well. I'm in graphic design and that's a big part of the design culture and I hate it. BUT there are a lot of careers that don't revolve around that either. Not *all* design places make drinking a big thing in or outside of the office. But the ones that do don't know how to have fun, IMO. I will be working part-time pretty soon for a studio that just likes watching anime, going to sushi bars and other asian restaurants. Sure, they like to drink, and they keep some beers in the fridge, but I don't see that as being a big issue or centering piece of their work environment. Whereas, an ad agency I interned at all hung out at bars together, and nowhere else.

The point is, you can choose who you want to be around, and what kind of environment you want in a work place. If it just doesn't "fit" for you, then chances are, it isn't for you.
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Old 06-14-2005, 12:02 PM   #14 (permalink)
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I as well felt like I was stuck in high school a lot of the time when I lived on campus. I being 20, didn't know what to do or how to act sometimes. I always wondered if some peoples' immaturity is normal for being in college. I finally decided that the immaturity level spreading around really wasn't for me. So i didn't need to pretend it was. Just like I don't think you need to feel like you should be partying all the time... I say, do whatever makes you happy....

But don't grow up too fast.
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Old 06-14-2005, 12:39 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Ryborg, are there any clubs on campus that might be of interest to you? Spending time with like-minded people may help to balance the sense of alienation that you are experiencing.
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Old 06-14-2005, 02:08 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Goddamn, did I start this thread? This could be my own experience word for word (except I'm a few months older than you, ryborg, sorry ). But yeah, I'm one of the few people my age, being 19, that don't spend all of their fucking time partying and getting drunk. Also, I have the misfortune of working a shit job that people think that teenagers typically work at (dishwasher at Cracker Barrel *pukes*) and alot of my coworkers take the "party animal" label to its limits (I tried to get a relationship going with a server there, and it turned out that she was hugeass drinker/boozer, totally different from me. Needless to say, it didn't go anywhere). The whole concept of partying and drinking at college and not giving a shit about grades is beyond retarded, not to mention that an underage drinking or DUI charge could toss my intended career (law enforcement) out the window. Sadly, as a result, I don't have much of a social life outside of 3 or 4 friends at the most, seeing as most social interaction centers around drinking, but whatever. Anyway, I was just posting to let you know that I can emphasize with you.
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Old 06-14-2005, 04:16 PM   #17 (permalink)
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I'll echo what the others said. You ARE a goddamn kid. This is the last point in your life when you still have a safety net of not getting fired if you don't turn in your assignment. Enjoy it.

And it sounds like you do, and some of your friends don't understand that this is also the time in life when responsibility should eek in somewhere. You DO understand that. You're ahead of the game in my book, and if your friends don't get it, well .. .they're idiots
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Old 06-14-2005, 05:01 PM   #18 (permalink)
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People don't take you seriously beccause of your delicate young age? Guess what. One day people won't take you seriously because you are too OLD.

There are a wide range of bullshit reasons people won't take you seriously:
You went to the wrong school
You got the wrong major
You don't have an advanced degree
You DO have an advanced degree
You have the wrong friends
You have the wrong religion
You don't party
You DO party
You aren't into the right sports
You have the wrong accent.

Welcome to real life, ryborg. Let me give you a little bit of advice. Make the most of your situation. Wherever you are in life, make the most of it. Enjoy the benefits of youth while you have them. I'd give my left nut to be able to mountain-bike, do Jujitsu, and live a life free of the disabilities that I have accumulated with age. (I'd also like to be banging college chicks again, but that's a different story.)

You don't like your crowd of partying friends? Find a different crowd.

You want to be taken seriously? So does everybody. It doesn't always happen. That's life.
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Old 06-14-2005, 10:35 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maleficent
I hate to sound like a grown-up, but I am -- the only thinKi can say here, is don't wish your life away... you get one shot to be this age... Enjoy it while you are in it, if you spend your time wishing you were older, you'll miss out on some stuff.
Don't get the impression that I'm wishing my life away -- my frustration was simply the focus of this post, which does not cover the full spectrum of what I experience day to day. If I'm guilty of anything, I think it would have to be taking myself, and things in general, too seriously.

Quote:
Originally Posted by maleficent
Once you hit the working world, you will find that some people still don't take their lives seriously, and still act like they are in high school, it's the person, not the environment. You can't change other people, you can just be true to yourself.
I used to work in the factory portion where I currently work before moving my programming spot. I have met people in both areas that are similar to what you have described here, although they seem to be more concentrated in the warehouse portion. I have not tried to change the people I conflict with, but I need to find a way to cope with them without getting frustrated.

Quote:
Originally Posted by maleficent
Some people might write you off because of your age, it's their loss, they will eventually come around. Other people will write everyone else's opinion's off because those opinions aren't theirs, age is not even a factor, that need to always be right i s what drives that.
It is possible that I'm confusing "age discrimination" (that term might be a little too strong here) with just general stubborn egos. I will keep this in mind when I am "dealing" with other employees.

Quote:
Originally Posted by maleficent
In the real world, you will find the slackers, and the professional partiers and the boys and girls who don't want to grow up, you being responsible will eventually pass them by and they won't matter so much. You will associate with people who are more like you, and those others will kind of dissappear from your view.
Noted.

Quote:
Originally Posted by maleficent
Yes, keep doing what you are doing, and keep your cool when dealing with people and you will eventually be heard
I keep my cool when I'm around them, but obviously the reality is they drive me crazy sometimes.

Quote:
Originally Posted by maleficent
I'm more than twice your age and am still looking to find that -- Hopefully you will be more successful than me.
At least we can find some mutual internet respect on TFP. Not the same as finding it in reality I suppose.

Quote:
Originally Posted by maleficent
You can expect to live your life for yourself, and do what makes you happy. It takes a strong person to not succumb to peer pressure no matter what the age is... It gets easier as you get older, but give yourself a lot of credit for finding your own way now and doing what you want to do.

It gets easier... Hang in there.
Right now I'm focusing in entirely on what makes me happy. I will take this advice to heart. Thanks Maleficent for your very complete response.
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Old 06-15-2005, 02:17 AM   #20 (permalink)
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As you get older and deeper into your professional career, you will discover that responsibility and authority is given not so much based on know-how and technical ability as it is on a person's ability to socially maneuver through an organization. This isn't so much a "kiss-ass" factor as it is the ability to effectively work with different personalities across different divisions of a company.

My point isn't that you need to be out drinking with the other students, but don't ignore the value of staying engaged with all types of people and befriending students that may not necessarily align perfectly with your interests and background. It will become as valuable to you as your tech acumen.
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Old 06-16-2005, 08:04 PM   #21 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by chickentribs
As you get older and deeper into your professional career, you will discover that responsibility and authority is given not so much based on know-how and technical ability as it is on a person's ability to socially maneuver through an organization. This isn't so much a "kiss-ass" factor as it is the ability to effectively work with different personalities across different divisions of a company.

My point isn't that you need to be out drinking with the other students, but don't ignore the value of staying engaged with all types of people and befriending students that may not necessarily align perfectly with your interests and background. It will become as valuable to you as your tech acumen.
I can't deny that this is the case in some organizations, but the ones I'm familiar with are geared more toward who's making the company the most money. These would include real estate offices, legal offices, car dealerships, professional lecturers, and pretty-much any other organization heavily driven by sales volume.

On the other hand, I'd say you're spot-on in regard to the military.
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Old 06-17-2005, 02:55 PM   #22 (permalink)
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I also felt like the odd man out when I went to college. All people talked about was drinking, smoking, "dubs", and the whole time I'm thinking, "Ok, we aren't in high school anymore."

People are afraid of being "caught" caring about stuff. Although this is common in college, it is less so than in high school.

We should lower the drinking age to 18, so people can get the party garbage over with before they hit college. Getting Ds and Fs in high school is free!!
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Old 06-18-2005, 10:04 AM   #23 (permalink)
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one of the best threads in a while here.

Ryborg, I'm 18, this fall entering college, and was in the same situation as you during my junior high years and early high school years; and in some aspects, even now. Then, I couldn't cope with it, and was so frustrated with it, along with the fact that I thought the problem with was me, and not them, I was put on medication for depression and anxiety.

A Few things that helped me:

- get involved in extracurriculars and take honors classes [if possible]: granted, there will still be some immature and callow kids in the clubs and harder classes, but you can and will find a better crowd to hang out with. There were quite a few friendships that I've killed in the past, because I realized that I moved on and that they didn't. [In fact, I'm dealing with one of those right now]. Even though you might even live with these immature kids in the dorms, try to do your best to separate yourself from them, but at the same time, keep them open if they do happen to change [and once in a while, a kid will change, so don't burn bridges. By this last sentence, I mean - don't completely ignore them, nor treat them like a 2 year old.
You just realize that certain people have certain coping mechanisms and stress relievers to take them away from the daily grind of work and school: some more refined than others.

And with regard to the others' responses: remember that at our age, those experiences [like spontaneiously going to safeway @ 2 am] are damned good memories, and we can only experience them at our age, due to the lack of commitments and responsiblities that we have. Recently, I've questioned if my medicene has made me become a less spontaneous, creative person....
For me, they [some of my random moments] were going to random ice cream parlors in europe last summer and just walking around coventry and tremont [cleveland] with my friends. [I hope they continue this fall too and beyond]. I feel sometimes, too, when I have free time randomly, to do something like go to see a comedic play, visit the other side of town, go to a cheap concert by indie/local act or something else, but none of my friends feel like joining, at the same time, I don't want to go alone...

- At work, keep on what you're doing, and make your known that you take this job seriously through your actions. I work at the movie theater with a bunch of other kids my age [some are mature, some aren't]. Eventually, coworkers and your boss[es] will see your actions, and respect for you it. For me, it took over a 1.5 years for that. Just last week, a co-worker [my age] sincerely complimented me for being one of the few kids who don't half-ass that much and actually give a shit about their job; and even sincerely asked me why I put that much effort, but I didn't know what response to give him. Reading 'What Would Buddah Do at Work ?' [book] encouraged me to be more patient and develop a better work attitude; I recommend it.

Even though I realize that every school has its parties, what college do you currently attend ? Check into how feasible it would be to see if there's another college that you could transfer to, that promotes an atmosphere more to your liking.

Catcha back on the flipside,
will.
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Old 06-19-2005, 02:33 AM   #24 (permalink)
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Hey Keyshawn. Thanks for your advice. I'll update you all on what has happened so far...

I've gotten out of the dorms and into a 2 bedroom apartment I'm sharing with an old friend of mine. Ever since escaping the dorms I have felt much happier. No nagging...no knocking on the door. I guess I am one of those people that need their own space. As for extracurricular activities, I signed up to be the website admit for my college's local ACM group. I don't have all the details on it really (professor is really lazy), but given my familiarity with web development I figured it would be something good for me to get involved in, amongst other things. In your post, Keyshawn, you mention coping mechanisms. I have discovered that mine are working constantly and also doing taking time to work on my art. Doing work privately (outside my official employment) has helped keep me busy, and my art just acts as a general dumping ground for whatever I'm feeling at the moment. I discovered that when I get bored is when I start to get upset/discouraged. As far as considering another college, that is too extreme for my current situation, and I intend on staying where I'm at. I probably could take honors classes, but I'm sick of busting my ass for grades, although I still bust my ass for them regardless (oh the irony). I also doubt that honors classes really gain you that much in the long run, but what do I really know? I took them all through high school, and I felt over prepared this first year. As you suggest, maybe I should take them just to meet some new people. At any rate, making new fiends/connections has never been my greatest gift. Throughout most of my life I have had 1, maybe 2 close friends and a collection of acquaintances. Also, it looks like I'll be working more closely with some of the people that have been driving me crazy at work, so I will be exercising many of the points provided in the posts above. Wish me luck.
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Old 06-19-2005, 10:49 AM   #25 (permalink)
A Storm Is Coming
 
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Location: The Great White North
As the saying goes, "Youth is wasted on the young."

Hold on, I don't mean that in a negative way! It just seems that when we are young we want to be older and the reverse is often true when we get older. The people that want you to party don't go away, they just get older and still party, sometimes getting somewhere in life but quite often not.

While you lose your youth as you get alder, there is the possibility for gaining wisdom. One of those things I've learned is that everything in life is a journy....from moving through it yourself, to rasing kids to different aspect of your acreer, to....well, you get the message. It only ends when you do. Many people wish their lives away waiting for their kid to walk, or focusing only on that promotion or not being totally happy with the new house or car they recently aquired.

There is probably something much deepre n your feelings. Perhaps yo want more control over your life, perhaps you're not happy with your friends or your living conditions. Whatever it is, I encourage you to figure that out and then start looking for the good at whatever point you find yourself.
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Old 06-20-2005, 01:01 AM   #26 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ustwo
Most college kids wake up at the end of junior year/start of senior year and know that 'the real world' awaits.

Also once you turn 21, half the fun of drinking is gone

I did more than my share of partying from 18-21 and I wish I would have had your attitude instead of the 'norm'. My grades would have been better, my life would have been easier, and I'd be about 2 years ahead of where I am right now.
That's funny, I'm 21 right now, and I didn't party much at all from freshman year to end of junior year. (Gonna be a senior). Why didn't I party much? Primarily because of my character, but also because I was studying all the time and basically aiming for high grades.
Yes, you are right, I *DO* wake up seeing that the real world is ahead of me.

But guess what, I also wake up regretting that I didn't have more fun, as much fun as other college students usually have. It's hard to make up for it, as now I have senior year left and will be busy with grad school apps, research, etc.

Alot of engineers I know are in the same boat. But there *are* many engineers who also are able to enjoy themselves more (their grades, though, are consequently lower).

It's a hard tradeoff, and I understand that from your perspective had you studied more, you'd be more ahead.
From *my* perspective, had I had more fun, I would have had more memorable experiences for life. I am trying to catch up on the fun, but given my ingrained work ethic to place school above all else, it probably isn't happening.
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Old 07-07-2005, 10:37 PM   #27 (permalink)
Upright
 
I just graduated in april, am 21 right now, and got my first job being a "professional" after undergrad.

In college, I was like you, wishing to be taken more seriously. I felt emotionally older than most people around me. I wanted to distinguish myself from them. I didn't care for most of the people I knew.

But now, I wish I had partied more. I wish did more crap with my friends. About that 2am trip to safeway ... well, it's 11pm and already way past my bedtime. I wish I could stay up that late. My job's in Seattle and my friends are in Michigan. It's not very exciting. I'm not sure what to do on weekends. Everyday, I just think about the time between after work and bedtime. Every night is this slot of time to fill. Most of the time, I think about when work will start (tomorrow / monday / etc) and how I'll have to go and figure out that whatever problem that previously proved itself impossible. If I can't figure out the problem, it's not just a low hw grade or a failed quiz, it's ... I gotta solve the problem. Period. And there's no TA or prof to ask for help. It's me and the code. I just started, so it's not that hard yet, but ... yeah.

Don't get me wrong, I love where I am and feel accomplished in life, but if I could re-live those 4 years, I would have gone out and had fun way more. I hope you do the same.

Last edited by qz103; 07-07-2005 at 10:38 PM.. Reason: grammar!
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Old 07-07-2005, 11:57 PM   #28 (permalink)
Crazy
 
I'm 21 and I feel like I'm 90. My parents said I was born 30. Sometimes I think people took me more seriously when I was 10 years old. Once I hit those teenage years people magically assumed I turned into a punk. Truth is, I don't drink, I don't smoke. I've never been outwardly rebellious or given any reason for people to think of me as a stereotypical young-man.

My only advice is to just live your life and be yourself. Don't worry about being taken seriously. The majority of people are incapable of seeing the truth no matter how you act or how old you are. Just being yourself will make such an impact on the people who actually do take the time to look at you seriously. If you're constantly trying get yourself recognized, it's more likely you'll discourage the important ones you want to understand you.
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Old 07-08-2005, 07:49 AM   #29 (permalink)
Hey Now!
 
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Location: Massachusetts (Redneck, white boy town. I hate it here.)
I'm 24 and I'm still the kid at my job. I felt the same way you do. Don't sweat it. Age is a frame of mind, not a number. Just don't grow up so fast. Stop aging at 21.


At 21, your still a kid, but a kid who can legally drink!
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Old 07-13-2005, 02:57 PM   #30 (permalink)
Upright
 
Ah, I can completely understand where you're coming from....

Personally, I've always considered myself (and been considered by others) much more mature than my peers, so the people I get along with most are either colleagues (at our Univ. newspaper) or people who are at least a year or two older than myself. My parents’ friends are some of the people I can relate to the most at times.

It's not an easy thing to have to deal with, especially if you are particularly good at doing something, yet still have the 'youngster' label at your workplace. I was recognized at work for my achievements at the end of this school year, being 'only a freshman and having gone so far.' As a first year student, working my way up to one of the editor/management positions is just about unheard of, but I somehow pulled it off. It's rewarding, but it doesn't come without that rather stigmatized label.

I'm 18, going on 19, but feel like I'm going on 26, 46, or 56. My parents always told me I had an old soul.

There are times where I've foolishly asked myself why I'm doing the whole college thing and not jumping straight into my most vested interests. The reason? I want to be able to better myself as a well-rounded person by getting a good liberal arts education. College is sure interesting, but there are a whole lot of immaturity issues that I see and deal with on a daily basis. And yes, just like you've mentioned, there is office drama. I'm actually quite happy to be able to learn and recognize the nature of office drama at this age, so that it's not such a surprise to me later on. It's an invaluable life and business lesson.

Hard work and dedication pays off in the long run, but it's also good to have fun while we still can.

Ever notice how this plays into a relationship with someone of the opposite sex? Girls will always want to go around and fuck the sleaziest guy they can find in college, but it's us 'nice' guys who get the short end of the stick for the time being. It's us guys who the girls 'would marry' but won't date for another 8 more years when they've gotten sick of running around and shallowly screwing like rabbits all throughout their college years.
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Old 07-14-2005, 07:11 AM   #31 (permalink)
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Location: Amish-land, PA
I was always the one that was the "old man" in my group. So what? I graduated college with a double major in Economics and Sociology, was a 36-hour per week bakery manager at the store that I worked at, and was sober about 2 out of 7 nights per week. My friends and I partied almost every day, including playing frisbee every day at 4 and poker every day at 9. My GPA was a 3.75.

My point is that you don't have to let the fun go in order to do well. In fact, we HATED people like you - the ones who were more concerned with reading a book than enjoying themselves. I was in the top 10% of my class, and I don't think I saw the inside of the library more than 5 times a year. There needs to be a equal balance between fun and study. In the end, college will be remembered as a time of great friendships and networking - trust me, you won't remember, or care about, most of the junk that you're spending time studying.
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