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Old 05-26-2005, 10:53 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Help getting over someone

How do you disassociate yourself from having feelings for your mate who is of the same sex. I know that I am not you know what but was just wondering if anyone out there can advise on the best way to overcome this predicament.
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Old 05-26-2005, 10:55 AM   #2 (permalink)
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what kind of feelings?

sexual feelings? intimacy feelings? love feelings?
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Old 05-26-2005, 11:11 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Not really sure. It's just that I constantly think about him and I have started to ignore him to see if this helps, but so far, it's not working.
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Old 05-26-2005, 11:14 AM   #4 (permalink)
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how do you think about him? in the same "smitten" or "infatuation" way you think about a girl?

what is it that you are thinking about?

you really need to add more details so that other people can comment on this.
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Old 05-26-2005, 12:12 PM   #5 (permalink)
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What would be so bad if you were "you know what"? Homosexual? Bi-curious? If you keep trying to suppress yourself, you're going to make yourself extremely psychotic in a short amount of time. Please, express yourself more thoroughly so that TFP can help!
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Old 05-26-2005, 12:17 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cynthetiq
you really need to add more details so that other people can comment on this.
Yes. And while you are at it, by "mate" I assume you mean "good friend", as opposed to "spouse"? You didn't enter your location, so I can't hear your accent to determine which slang terms are appropriate.
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Old 05-26-2005, 12:19 PM   #7 (permalink)
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When I am not around him, I often think about what he is up to. When I am around him, his sillyness makes me smile. I constantly wait for him to call . Lately he has hooked up with someone and the fact that he has not bothered to call me to hang out really bums me out. I want to be around him all the time and I envy people that are close to him. Is that love or infatuation?
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Old 05-26-2005, 12:23 PM   #8 (permalink)
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I think it sounds like somewhere between smitten and infatuation. I say find an adult recreational league for a sport you like and get involved with that, or video games, or whatever is your "bag." Spending some time doing things you love to do will make up for that feeling of longing, and who knows, you may meet a really great person!

Cheer up, ojay...we are all pulling for you and that should, at least, make you smile.
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Old 05-26-2005, 12:27 PM   #9 (permalink)
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My bestfriend from HS, I think of him all the time, I wonder what he's up to, when we are together his silliness makes me smile. I constantly wait for him to call. He's been married for a number of years, and I'm quite jealous of her getting to spend so much time with him. I get to spend about 4-5 hours a year with him if I'm lucky.

I know I love him, but it's something I recognized about 5 years into our friendship.

But the ultimate question here... is are you thinking of him as a friend or a potential lover?
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Old 05-26-2005, 12:28 PM   #10 (permalink)
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does he have a sister?
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